What is Bhagwa Atheism ?

A hypocritical and privileged form of atheism that is critical against any religion (particularly Islam), but harbours sympathy for his religion in which they were born i.e. Hinduism.

Why is this sympathy?

The answer is simple ...casteism, we shall discuss this later on how this is deeply rooted in caste based privileges that facilitates such thinking. To understand this let me explain from my point of view:

According Marxism, in a feudalist/semi-feudalist/capitalist society there are two types of classes mostly, namely: the Bourgeois (the ruling class who controls the means of production and generates profit from the exploitation of working classes labour power) and The Workers (or Proletariats) (who do not own any means of production and has no power to purchase labour power of others, and they survive solely by selling their own labour power).
These classes emerge only at a certain stage in the development of the productive forces and the social division of labour, when there exists a social surplus of production, which makes it possible for one class to benefit by the expropriation of another. The conflict between classes there begins, founded in the division of the social surplus, and constitutes the fundamental antagonism in all class.

This holds true in case of several capitalist nations such as US, Canada, South Korea, etc. But however in case of India this classification becomes complicated due to yet another form of classification which effectively nullified any form of possible class conflict, 'Casteism'.

What is Casteism in Hinduism ?

Hindu Casteism (from material basis) is a form of hereditary class based on hierarchal order which ensures the flow the capital to the top most caste order and control over modes of production with the help of religious decrees itself.
It's a classification which sets 'permanent classes' based on their 'assigned' modes of production and their position within it's societal superstructures according to their hierarchy set by the 'permanent' ruling classes.
Once you take birth in one of these castes (hereditary classes), you'll be automatically assigned to the forces of production according to the 'order', which you'll do for the rest of your life.
Unlike Class, Casteism severally restricted upward mobility of people belonging to the lower strata of the Caste order, exception being a few handpicked intermediate 'gate keeping' castes loyal to this system. Who were sometimes rewarded by promotion, to become ruling classes itself.

So what changed this ?

Pre-arrival of British colonisation, caste and class were very much indistinguishable. Apart from ruling class there were hand picked bourgeois intermediate classes (vaishya) who were in direct service to the upper caste (sometimes the roles were reversed). The proletarian class (shudra and pariahs) were pretty much same as their european counterparts, lacked capital and hence no control over their means of production, in addition to that they also faced inhumane discrimination because of the caste in which they were born in. Thus were looked down upon as inferior subhumans.
This discriminatory system ensured poverty of the lower caste and prosperity of the top order, despite the lower caste comprising 90% of the population, as well as guaranteed cheap labour and exploitation of the working class 'caste'.
However with the introduction of colonial capitalism by Britishers the modes of production of old feudal order 'fused' with it to become a semi-industrial semi-feudal economy. This is when for the first time the European styled working classes began to take shape in India, parallel to hereditary classes that is casteism. This also introduced new bougeois classes within every community irrespective of their caste, but it's topic for another discussion.
Irrespective of the changes the older hereditary classes still affected this new order, those belonging to upper caste still had access to privileged jobs, better positions and capitals, hence were comparatively in better & prosperous position to that of those belonging to the lower strata of the older caste based order. With the introduction of 'English Education Act 1835' and later 'Macaulay Committee 1854' by Britishers, it further cemented caste order within this new colonial administration, ensuring the hierarchy of the upper caste and exploitation of oppressed castes.

Privileged classes and Caste blind class struggle

In words of Thomas Babington Macaulay:

"We (Britishers) should try to create a class of people, who would work as translators between the people who we are ruling and us, even though they may look like Indians by color; but their likes and dislikes, morals and thinking will be like an Englishman"

As, we can see the British were ok with the casteism as long as it ensured their hold and smooth management of their empire. Sure they helped abolishing the gut wrenching misogynistic practices such as 'Sati' but made almost zero effort to abolish caste system and untouchability (as this would mean they'll loose insubordination of intermediate 'gate keeping' classes that were in service to the British crown.
This new Intermediate urban classes had privileges to several rights within colonial administration in comparison to ordinary classes, however as we have mentioned earlier that with the introduction of colonial capitalism majority of castes further split into binary classes, economically forward and backward classes (note : this was only in case of upper and intermediate castes, majority of oppressed castes were still under poverty). The economically forward classes were infact the privileged classes and the economically backward classes began to fall in the borderline category between Upper-intermediate castes and Lower castes.
And this where 'caste blind' atheism, secularism, and socialism originates from. Who saw capitalism as well as colonialism as cruel system/occupation with respect to their material conditions but failed to emancipate and recognise inhumane treatment faced by those below their classes.
But does this mean that they were barred same as oppressed communities in upward mobility within this colonial capitalism?
No, They still had access to capitalist progress and upward mobility within the society. Simply put,

Casteism filtered oppressed castes from upward mobility within this new capitalist order while capitalism ensured that there will be limited progressiveness within the upper caste friendly circles.

So, whenever an economically backward class member transitioned into economically forward class they carried out his former progressive social ideas to their new found social position within society, while simultaneously giving up their resistance to capitalism. This new default ideology was known liberalism.
British colonial administration in India had many parallels with Apartheid system, but that is debate for another topic.

Consequences of Caste blindness in other '–isms'

With important positions still in access to powerful 'caste blind' and 'casteist' members of the society, they began to clash for power struggle. But they all had one commonality, they didn't gave up their caste identity.
During independence this power struggle began to materialise in two types of ideologies basically – 'caste blind' Leftism and 'meritocracy' based liberalism/conservativism but non of them were seriously against at each others throat as they were getting equal opportunities for their personal betterment.
But, what did the oppressed caste proletariats gain from this? Nothing.
They only got a chance at betterment when Dr. Ambedkar, Jyotiba Phule, Savitri Bai Phule,etc began to make efforts at upliftment of them. However their efforts lacked anti-capitalist approach which emphasized less on capitalist oppression more on caste based emancipation. Which later proved detrimental in their efforts.

Modern day India and caste based wealth inequality

After the ( ½) implementation of Mandal Commission and Naxal Uprising, it began to perturb this harmonic 'clash' between conservatives and progressive left-liberal dynamics as it began to inject more and more political conciousness within the oppressed communities for reservations and political participation.
This is where the concept of savarna meritocracy, comes forth.

Illusion of Meritocracy

Meritocracy is a belief that affirmative actions results in positive results and vise versa in reality is a capitalist hypothesis, a fallacy which fuels the illusion that we are in a merit-based system.

Meritocracies tend to stratify over time. Successful people will pass on their wealth and privileges to their children and can perpetuate a widening inequality of opportunities. It can lead to the misplaced belief that only their talents and hard work account for their success, neglecting the support they have received. — Chan Chun Sing, Min. of Education, Singapore

This meritocratic illusion began to impose predetermined conditions which were biased and opaque on underprivileged candidates, missing to match their criterion in fixed amount of time means ruining of candidate's dreams. In other words it was an underhand tactics to filter out 'representation based/unfavourable candidates' and simply stereotyping them as 'unworthy', disregarding the unequal support the competing candidates got due to their material conditions and pretends that they 'reward the best of the best,' also overlooking the possibility of discrimination faced by oppressed caste students at hands of Upper caste dominant faculties.

After 1960 more and more population of the United States spent more than one-fourth of their entire lifetime in schools, from ages two to twenty-two. As on so many other levels and ways of mass democracy, inflation had set in, diminishing drastically the content and the quality of learning: more and more young people, after twenty years in schools, could not read or write without difficulty. Schools are overcrowded, including colleges and universities. In this increasingly bureaucratized world little more than the possession of various diplomas mattered. Since admission to certain schools-rather than the consequently almost automatic acquisition of degrees-depended on increasingly competitive examinations, the word “ meritocracy“ was coined, meaning that the rising positions to be acquired in society depended on the category of the degree and on the category of the college or university where from one graduate. In reality the term “meritocracy“ was misleading. As in so many of these spheres of life, the rules that govern the practices and functions of schools and universities were bureaucratic rather than meritocratic. It is bureaucracy, not meritocracy, the categorizes the employment of people by their academic degrees. The number and the variation of degrees awarded by higher institutions grew to a fantastic, and nonsensical, extent. Besides being custodial, the purpose of institutional education was now the granting of degrees to provide instant employment. – John Lukacs (At the End of an Age)

Final Conclusion

Provided all factors what we can conclude that Bhagwa Atheism, is form of Hindu upper caste exceptionalism (Agonistic Atheism) which believes in:
•the illusionary meritocracy that their material conditions is due to the (upper) caste in which they were born in.
•hating all religious dogma belonging to all faiths (including hinduism) but still hold dear to their caste based identity, hence the sympathy for hinduism.
•merit based order, refuses to acknowledge caste discrimination and caste wealth gap, sees it as inherited inability.
•convenient switching between Atheism and minimal Hinduism.
•convenient switching between liberalism and conservativism.
Thus, it's a type of agonistic atheism which does more & more damage to gnostic atheist beliefs and their critical thinking potential, making them more and more susceptible towards theism. In case of ex-hindus it's hinduism.

Myself and my husband used to live in another city where we owned an apartment but after having a child 5 years ago we decided to move closer to where we were brought up to be closer to family and so our child could have a closer relationship with their grandparents.
My mom and I were always close but since moving back she's been quite controlling and critical of me, my parenting and how I want to live my life which means around every couple of months she ends up telling me she will never see me again. She always comes back into the fold after a week or so on the premise that she wants to see her grandchild and so the cycle continues. My child doesn't know any of this is going on in the background, we try to keep things normal for them. It's very exhausting but we want them to have a relationship and I would never want to stand in the way of that.
So the AITA question - my husband and I kept our apartment and rented it out because we weren't sure if we would like moving home and also as an investment for our retirement. However with changes in the economic outlook we decided to sell.
My mom knew we were selling but I didn't go into detail in terms of finances or what was agreed because she has very strong opinions (which she believes are always right) and likes to criticise so I thought best to avoid going into detail with her - after all it is our business, not hers and I felt keeping her at a distance from it was better for my mental health.
The sale finally went through after some difficulties which took months. I let her know it had gone through and we had made some money which was great. She seemed happy at first and I said we would find a way to celebrate.
The next day I received messages saying she will never see me again because I was sly. She won't answer calls but I can only imagine this is because she didn't know the details of the sale and how much money we made. She says she feels unwanted and I can only imagine this because I didn't offer to take her on holiday or something to share the wealth but I didn't feel I could say that when I didn't know exactly how much money we would be left with after taxes, paying off loans and contributing to our current house.
She suggested the money was for spending but I see it as a pot for ours and our child's future. I had thought we could go for a holiday with her as a thank you for all she's done for us over the years but didn't mention this because I hadn't spoken to my husband about it - he has little patience for her because of how she treats me. Now she has once again cut me off and said all this about me I am less inclined to give her money or take her on a holiday. AITA for not involving her more or for offering her a share of the money? Within a day she has disowned me for all this.

Wow. It’s been 5 years since the last GRMD. Every year we try to get as many people in the /hongkong community to show up and meet each other in person. This year Reddit admin changed things a bit and turn it into GRMW to give some flexibility. We decided on June 15th (Saturday).
I’d toyed with the idea of just doing a big /hongkong meetup like previous years even without any Reddit endorsement like the Xmas party of 2017 and 2018, but venue prices have gone way up since pre-COVID. So we’d managed to arrange something to keep prices as affordable as possible.
Time: 19:00 -00:00
Venue:
This time we will host at DMZ, a gaming venue run by kwuhkc and pyrosas. We will have video games, board games, and karaoke available. If anyone have games they want to play, feel free to bring them along.
Directions:
Map Link
Unit A1, 7/F, Chuan Yuan Factory Building, 342-344 Kwun Tong Rd, Ngau Tau Kok
From Ngau Tau Kok MTR station, exit B5. Cross Lai yYp Street following Kwun Tong Road until you reach Yan Yip Street. Follow the Yan Yip Street to the first building entrance to the right, this will be Chuan Yuan Factory Building. Take any elevator to the 7th floor, and you have arrived!
Games:
Ranging from Card Against Humanity to Hero Quest, 3 TV setups available for karaoke, Nintendo switch and steam deck hookups, bring your consoles people! Jackbox is available as well.
While the games are fun and all, the important part of GRMD is for people to come out and meet each other and make new friends.
The venue will have a lot of space for people to fan out and hang out, so regardless of if you are new to the scene or a long time veteran/lurker, come on by and make some buddies!
Food:
Buffet style, but not unlimited. If we run out of food and there are still hungry people we can call for take out.
Drinks:
There will be non alcoholic drinks available.
Alcoholic drinks will be BYOB, please bring to share. (Also, I like stouts.)
Group photo:
I plan on having the group photo at around 8:30 or so. I will also be leaving my old cameras around the venue so feel free to pick them up and shoot away. I'd appreciate it if other people take some candid pictures of the event.
Costs:
HK$300 per person flat fee if you prepay by the deadline (June 9th 23:59), HK$350 after the deadline or at the door. This will cover drinks and food.
Why prepay?
This is necessary due to logistic and budget reasons, and more importantly we need to know how much food to order from the catering company (the amount of money we collect by the deadline will determine what and how much we order). Please help us out by pre-paying ASAP!
How to pay:
Please do a FPS/PayMe transfer to 96332968 (WONG H** S** S**** ) $300 (for each person). Send a WhatsApp to +852-96332968 with following info:

• Your name (and/or whatever alias you wish to identify yourself by)
• The number of people coming
• Screenshot of the receipt

Once I confirmed received payment we will put you into the Super Secret Elite WhatsApp group for cool Redditors. Again, past the 6/9 deadline the cost goes up to $350.
And before anyone ask I will not be doing any tiered pricing. Please don't ask if you can just come and play and not eat and pay less money, or if you are going to be late, or if you are going to leave early. It just make things more complicated for us and math is hard. Also, no exception for anyone on paying past the deadline.
If for some reason you do not have FPS/Payme, PM me and we will see if we can arrange something. I will try to do a pub crawl the weekend before and you can try to meet me and pay me in person.

Would super appreciate it if everyone reads this long-ass thesis of a post with an open mind and to the end...its me being vulnerable in an anonymous reddit sub because i think these things matter in the larger framework of a uniquely special show and the larger world we all as humans live in. My last post in this sub was downvoted to hell which btw totally ok...and i dont depend on reddit currency for my livelihood so its all good. I just care about my posts being read...specially this one.
Some context:
I'm very new to this community and the show as well. Currently have time off work and going ham on reddit and venturing very scared into the deep dark of world of rabid fandoms and small niche communities. Getting a little burnt along the way but also learning from some super talented fans with their own eye-opening ideas and funny posts. Im also an aspiring writer and well...some of my best ideas have come from reddit lurking on cool and active subs with bridgerton sub being new for me. Jet lagged, anxious and just a tad bit antsy, I'm trying to go down and deep and maybe open some deeper discussions here.
I am Indian and lived primarily in India my whole life and now for the last 10 years between London and Canada (why am I sharing all this like am I going to tell you my weight, my height etc too...No but hopefully you'll understand this revelation as you read ahead without me spelling it ou)
So I've been trying to figure out why fan wars about this show prick so personally.
I think fandoms anywhere in every country are full of insane people, obsessive chronically online people who find comfort through living through their faves..your beyonce stansm your rihanna stans, your Taylor Swift stans, your harry styles stans, your k pop fans, etc efc..
This show also has some rabid fans..But there is a conversation I want to open up only because I think it's important...Is fighting extra hard for your poc fave because you know their representation in pop culture is limited, their getting jobs is limited, subconscious biases exist even though we have been making great strides and even eradicated overt biases in employment, in accessibility, in government service etc etc ..
Our ideas of beauty are framed by the extensiveness and longevity of colonial rule across the world.
there are shit people across all ethnicities religions and genders and natjonalies. Barbarians, conquerors, invaders, pillaging villages raping women destroying livelihoods suppressing the peasant class, mutilating and diluting cultures exist in Africa, Indian subcontinent, East asia, middle East etc so not just Britain. Basically being brown, black or East Asian and Middle Eastern doesnt grant you moral superiority over white people and you can be racist and casteist and colorist and bigoted and biased and just all around shitty as a black, brown, east asian middle eastern just as much as white people.
So now that thats settled, lets look at specific issues that POC only face because that eventually streams into the show and its politics and its discussion as well.
But for whatever reason ...the British were able to colonize on a scale that the other countries and ethnicities were able to.. African and the Indian subcontinent's conquests and invasions were limited in area and time period...their scale of conquest limited to a small radious around their own countries...and not foreign lands travelled via sea etc. As a result and only as a result and not because and I cannot emphasize enough that black, brown or east asian invaders, rulers etc were morally superior, kinder, less assholes...the culture that became dominant was white british culture..or european culture...if Indians had conquered the world, they would have imposed their culture on the lands and countries rhey invaded, if different african countries invaded the world to the extent of the british colonists, same thing...the dominant culture that would have been forcibly imposed by the people of african ethnicity would be their culture... Black skin would have been considered beautiful, white fair skin would not have been the standard....thats history....thats something we know to be true even through modern wars...the victor dictates...But that simply didnt happen.
it's not because they were Africans or Asians or basically non white people morally superior or I don't know were like we don't invade and conquest, we so good. But because that's history. They just didn't manage it. thats simply our current historical reality. Being that the country that did manage to conquer the world or close to 9/10ths of it were european or more specifically British white nationals..which means as would happen even if another nationality had managed to invade the world, the culture that is dominant across the world is a west/white slanted world..
Colorism as a concept didnt exist until colonization: Why would it? If everyone existed under the same harsh sun, had the same skin color with minor variances...why would they think fair is more beautiful. Its because they wouldnt...the first blond haired blue eyed people would have been introduced to India via early traders of east india company in India and dutch colonists before them...Its like if everyone around you is brown, you assume thats just how everyone else looks like...thats the only reality you know...you simply havent seen anyone look any different..you havent seen blue eyes or anything else....same for africans and within that framework as humans are wont to do you create ideas of beauty.
So yes. POCs across the globe had just as arbitrary ideas of beauty as white people (chiense mutilated young women feet cuz small feet more beautiful, in africa genital mutiliation) because humans are humans and humans mess everything up...and animals are so much better...but color as a construct is a colonial one and one which managed to find deeep deep roots because of the extent of the rule, the sheer longevity, For context, India has been independent for the last 75 years..from over 200 years of colonial british rule...Not even the length of the life of a single human. Not even as long as Britains former queen was alive. It will take some more time for that in fighting and ideas of colorism deeply penetrated from the inheritance of our rulers to get dismanted...and totally thrown own...because you can freee from literall bondage more easily, the mind takes longer to adjust and form independent thought. But it will happen.
White people are not more or less racist than POC. Thats not a thing. There are shit people and you can find shit people anywhere...I have shit people right in my own home country, bigots, destroying the diversity of India by bullshit tactics...
But as it stands...because this cultural superiority of British and white people took over, the framing of beauty, of whats fashionable, of whats cool, of whats civilized is all seen through the lens of white culture...eating with hands which many cultures across the world do uncivilized unhygienic, paris fashions and made in italy...mark of excellence...made in India and China...cheap, low quality, scammers and shit people, (thats not to say shit people and scammers dont exist in India and China and there arent industries of scammers across these poorer nations but there is also denying the equisite craftasmanship across fashion and beauty in both countries-China and India.
Brown skin bad, even darker skin even bad etc etc...We wear clothes that our colonial masters did across the world, you wont find people in china wearing Chinese clothes, same for India, african countries etc...everything from clothing, to beauty, to furniture, to houses everything indigenous was changed to a foreign ideal from our rulers. The same would have happened whoever whichever ethnicity had invaded the world...like i said above..
Now and thanks for reading whoever read till here and I hope a lot of people did-on to to the show...
There is this frequent refrain and accusation of oppression olympics that I read about when it comes to this show, in general online discourse and also this insanely disgusting article fat shaming Nicola Coughlan in The Spectator.
And i really really want to open up this conversation...cuz race gets discussed a lot on this sub and other bridgerton subs and therefore a perfect place to have that conversation...Do Non-POC really believe in the concept of oppression olympics and that all kinds of biases are equally treacherous to navigate?
So I was overweight in my teens...I had a close friend who was wheelchair bound. my life was hard and I was bullied but surely surely I do not think that my plight was the same as my friend in a wheelchair...In class 10th, a close friend's father passed away, the same year my grandmother passed away, surely, surely, I dont think we are experiencing the same pain the same setback to our life...Class 10th in India is akin to A levels in Britain and SAT in the USA..
You know why I didnt think any of this and why if I had i was wrong, because there is a hierarchy to opression, .to loss, to struggles. There simply is. Opression Olympics is rooted in reality.
Pain is pain, loss and bad foundations suck ass...but privilege is a thing and some pains some loads just lighter compared to others. I could lose weight and get over the oppression I was facing because of my weight in school. My wheelchair bound friend didnt have that option..I wouldnt get my grandmother back...but my fathers loss would have a more immediate affect on my life and my friend who lost her father and her loss was just simply deeper. She needed more support, more help, more people crowding around her saying you've got this Niharika..well make sure your life doesnt change permanently cuz youlve lost your dad.
So when show fandom compare Jonathon Baileys struggle to Rege Jean George or say Victor Ali, they are simply pointing out that yes while Jonathon Bailey is gay...there is a difference between being white and gay and being black and gay or simply harder being black. And therefore there is a hierarchy. Why POC are less loath to crticize the average acting of their POC faves because they know the opportunities for them are limited. Lets do an exercise name 5 shows led by a POC in the USA or Britain or Canada-any POC..brown, black i dont care. And im not talking about black or brown actors in a show or film, im talking leads...
Also biases are self perpetuating....When black or brown led films fail, the opportunities immediately dry up because it shows that its just fairness and the numbers dont lie..Except this is not maths.....Maths would be first making equal amount of shows starring black or brown people, and then comparing...Now if the end result is white led shows do better-that would be correct math...but ratios and comparisons and statistics need to first start with an even scale...thats not even me taking about diversity...thats just math formulas...
If lets say there are 500 actors who are white in hollywood and 200 who are Black in hollywood, and lets say all 200 black actors are shit...would you say the statement...god white actors are so much better than black actors...no cuz the maths is not adding up...you compared 500 actors who were white of which 300 were excellent 200 bad and you made that into the conclusion that white actors are better because you were comparing only with 200 black actors to begin with...the actual math formula yieled equal number of bad and good actors..
Why people defend Kanthony harder...or wanted Simone Ashley to be promoted as much as Polin is because (lets go with my Math analogy again) all things being the same) unless Nicola and Luke are really bad actors compared to Simone Ashley, theyll still have it easier in acting...they simply will. they wont have to change their confusingly, long foreign sounding name, they wont have to work at assimilation in other ways, lets say they were muslim they wouldnt have been trying hard to sell themselves as Im just as liberal as you, im not a threat. And I love Luke Newton and Nicola Coughland-both seem like throughly, likable, personable, kind hearted beans..
Now my own experience. I have stated in an earlier post on this sub that I'm a Shonda Rhimes fan...because I have personally benefitted from the diversity she has included so naturally, so elegantly in all her shows. My own ideas of beauty, have been tested and transformed. In fact I know exactly the moment it happened...watching Christina Yang as a 14 year old...and thinking god meredith is so beautiful and I want to see more of HER and Izzie but then seeing christina again and again and again over each episode over hundreds of hours of binging, school, college, masters, big move outside India, my own constant this show..my brain was soft mushy and impressionable and christina yang, korean Sandra Oh became suddenly but actually slowly and then all at once became beautiful to me...I dont know when it happened but like the book Colin telling Penelope I dont know when or how and why others dont see it but you ARE beautiful in the book carriage scene. I found her hot, I found her cool. I cared to learn more about her Korean mother and her Jewish father and it didnt matter that the show never covered that culture..Christina was atheist and could handle her shit..even around racists.. But I still wanted to learn more about HER..a woman I simply didnt think was beautiful comparable to meredith and Izzie..me an impressionable 14 year old..just made that turn because of a show.,..a fluffy...not that deep soapy as hell show.
But it was only possible cuz I saw 24 episodes day in day out,...over many many years....for that to happen. I had many more years of falling asleep to dawsons creek joey and dawson, joey and pacey, gilmore girls rory and jess rory and dean rory and logan..i imagined and dreamt of windswept Mr. Darcy...and of course I luckily had my own countrys pop culture cuz I grew up and lived in a country where I was repped plenty eveywhere... So i found bollwood heroes hot and I found White americans or british people hot...my brain simply didnt have a framework for East Asians hot. And I needed to seem them constantly and frequentlyn and in Hot front and center, desirable covetable-their culture, their families all respected, admired again and again and again over many years for that switch to happen.
So why do we fight for our POV faves.. fight hard (some fight really ugly too which....they are not my people ( as in I dont know them) so sorry for that)....because we know how much more repping they need...we know how much MORE MORE MORE important it is to see POC culture done right...because it simply is not accessible,...cannot be to people outside..
K POP is making waves super..., people love themselves some MANGA and kimchi...so good and progress...but a lot of countries pop culture is in the native tongue...people outside of it cannot access it...in the same way one would English language content-books, podcasts, news, films, shows etc etc. And hollywood does our culture wrong, played up for laughs, stinky curry, stinky indians, scamming Indians, uncivilized heathens, oh so funny that Sofia Vergara and her funny accent (The Ellen Show), niche shows that dont become popular behemoths because it stars all ethnic casts-Fresh Off the Boat.
You simply will not understand how brilliant and gorgeous my country's embroideries, temple art, clothing and fashion, actors and sculptors, museums and writing and authors are...not because YOU are racist..but because you dont speak-my language and my culture isnt dominant or wide spread enough-insert again-my above explanation of colonialism and dominant and suppressed cultures. History made one culture the most widespread...again not because white people, bad and racist...brown and black people good and not racist and benevolent..but they simply were the victors...for centuries...plural.
We want to fight harder for Rege and defend him leaving the show (im not even black but when you live outside of your home country, all POC seem like a united underrepresented group and you find kinship everywhere) because any potential cancellation or quote unquote unlikeability and hes difficult accusations would hurt him far far more than Nicola Coughlan, Luke Thompson, Newton, Phoebe etc. for the same crimes. And there just arent enough of us to begin with to lose even one. For what is quite honestly a mid Netflix show with seeds of promise but a lack of ambition.

I have so far been up all night as I can’t fall asleep for nothing. I have been stressing so much lately and there is nothing that can ease the stress.. on top of the thoughts of what can happen to the baby long term medical wise from all this stress. It’s honestly so much eating away at me and I just don’t know what to do with these thoughts. I am going to just write away everything that’s been eating away at me.. that is why this is going to be very long as it’s been a lot so far… I got off birth control in December as life was going amazing and it was giving me awful migraines as I was rearing my third year being on nexplanon. I knew that there could be a possibility of getting pregnant and honestly with how life was going the thought of potentially getting our boy as we have two girls right now was really exciting me. I have been working from home and recently got a huge raise and things were looking great. A month after getting off the birth control I started feeling weird, that intuition feeling came. Shortly after, my job that I had been with for almost 3 years randomly lays off a lot of employees including me with no notice or anything. I thought it would be a long term job but they eventually grew financial issues. Of course I didn’t want to abort this baby just because my job laid me off. I am a very independent person so of course I would do anything to make sure me and mine are straight. I start back doordashing full time from 9 am to 9 pm and I stay an hour from the nearest city so the stress of wear and tear on my car has always scared me but you gotta do what you gotta do as a parent. Of course they say I’m eligible for unemployment and I’ve tried endless times to file for it and they always denied me due to work searches as I wasn’t applying to the right places when I was applying EVERYWHERE. No matter what I put. Every week would get denied cause of this and the phone number is impossible to reach someone. So I’ve given up on unemployment. We lived off of our tax return plus DoorDashing which I really wanted to save this money. The work search has been so stressful. I got a seasonal job and did amazing at it working up to 18 hours overtime one day but they over hired people so there was way to many people to consider hiring everyone full time so once it ended less then a month of working there that was it. Until I got a call from my dream job which my mom and my bf mom both work there and it pays way higher then what I’ve made on top of providing a hybrid schedule too. I felt it was a stretch applying but my resume looked really good so I went for it. I got an interview with them and the interviewer loved me and said he felt really confident in me and would like to offer me the position. Of course I’m overly excited cause this is my dream job. After filling out the onboarding and going to scheduled onboarding appointments they state there was only one issue stopping my onboarding which was a previous account with them that had restrictions on it that I was not aware of. I trusted the wrong “friends” back in high school 7 YEARS AGO with my personal information not knowing any better and they did fraud with my information and of course it fell back on me. I even paid back every owed penny from the fraud to clear my name to move on from that mistake. They never told me they also proceeded to put restrictions cause of it. So my onboarding was put on hold until I handled the restrictions. Fast forward a month later of struggling making ends meet. We have no more income tax money.. but at least I finally receive a response saying the restrictions would be removed. So finally we receive great news. I let the people know and they proceed to let me know that someone will reach out to me in 5-7 days and it has now surpassed that time frame with no response and I am just so scared that they won’t follow through.. It is now June and I have been struggling to get a full time job since February and I am holding onto the little ounce of hope that this job will follow through like they said… Holding onto that ounce of hope as doordash grew very stressful I decided to pull all of my retirement out from my previous job to put into savings in case we need it for an emergency especially if the car were to go out on us. on top of our apartment lease renewal coming up. We did NOT want to renew the lease because this apartment has treated us HORRIBLY since we moved in. We came from a clean bug free apartment due to the rent randomly increasing twice since we moved in it and moved 30 minutes to be closer to my OLD job and his family. We moved into this apartment because I had a work friend refer it to me saying it was her first apartment and she fell in love with it. Not knowing we were going to get the worst apartment building probably out of the whole complex. Since we moved in we could not look at the apartment until after the lease was signed and given the keys. We moved ONE box into the place and came back days later to move the rest of our stuff. We moved that box and SO MANY roaches scattered from it and we knew instantly we got played and that now all of our things were going to be roach infested now. Fast forward almost a whole year later we have tried endless methods to get rid of them such as boric acid, orthene, endless traps, endless raid bottles, ONTOP of the apartment buildings monthly pest control coming in doing whatever they do and WE STILL HAVE THEM. No matter what we do they are not leaving as I believe even tho we try different methods it won’t matter if everyone else in the building aren’t trying to get rid of them. They are probably being constantly rotated between the other apartments around us so it’s useless. I DO NOT WANT TO BRING MY NEW BORN BABY INTO THIS APARTMENT. On top of all the plugs in the walls has blown in the living room. I let the landlord know about this and they sent there only technician to check it out and they didn’t know what they were doing. They switched the power surge switches on and off and it fixed the plugs but they proceeded to go back out the next day. We haven’t even been there a year and the refrigerator has been tearing up like crazy. The whole bottom of it has ripped off cause apparently the adhesive is so strong when closing and opening that it slowly tore its own frame off. We had to use gorilla glue to glue it back on and it’s so far worked. On top of the rims around the door got so many rips in it. The door holders on the fridge can’t hold anything heavy or else the whole shelf falls off same as the door handles on the freezer so we have to carefully move things around it and put only certain things in those spots or else it’s all going to the floor. The first red flag of the apartment is there are no washer and dryer hook ups and that is honestly the least of our problems with this place.. the bolts on the dish washer are so tiny and unscrewed with time and randomly the whole dish washer completely fell down from being poorly connected to the counter. Whenever you open it to put dishes in you have to hold the racks or else the whole dish washer will fall forward and they will roll out with all the dishes in it. I’m so over this place and we have BEEN ready to move out. So once the 30 days came up I contacted the landlord about the 30 day notice that we were going to move out before the lease renewed. She proceeded to tell me with no emotion that they required a 60 DAY notice in advance prior to our lease end date and that our lease already renewed for another YEAR. She didn’t even try to help us out and did not provide any kind of notice or reminding about the 60 day notice. She just kept repeating that we signed the lease and it is written in the lease. She said if we move out we will be responsible to pay the months rent for each upcoming month until a new tenant moves in and takes over the lease which is very unlikely as they have full control on whether they want to move someone new in or continue to bill us the monthly rent.. So now we are trying to figure out how we are going to work out this New obstacle/road block and I am already halfway through my pregnancy. All of this stress has been eating me alive for the whole beginning of my pregnancy and it ALL came out of the blue. This is not how I pictured being pregnant with my third baby and I feel completely miserable right now. I am struggling doordashing all day just waiting for any kind of good news. We are thinking about ditching this apartment and going to stay with my mom until we find a full time job to afford a new apartment as we just want to start the process of this landlord potentially searching for a new tenant to take this burden off of us. We do not wish to pay two apartment rents as my credit is amazing and I know if they put any of this apartments owed rent when we move out on my collections it will ruin my credit.. we have been growing it for when we are ready to get our first home. So I know not paying it is not an option for me. I’ve just been wishing this ongoing nightmare will finally come to an end and I can finally receive any kind of good news. I was sooo excited about this pregnancy but now I have zero excitement for it as I have been through endless stressing and roadblocks the whole pregnancy so far. I am afraid that this stress and pain will affect the baby long term.. I do not wish to bring this baby into this apartment as I fully wish to be in a new upgraded apartment bug free when the baby comes in October my birthday month.. It’s just super hard holding onto any kind of motivation right now and the pain is slowly eating me up inside.. I just really needed to get all of this off of my chest and hopefully maybe I can finally get some sleep right now. If you read all of this.. thank you for listening and all I can really say is check on your people cause you never know what they could be going through as life can hit so random at times..

TLDR: I want to give you benchmarks and scientific processes to understand the outcome of the 2024 election without any prejudice.
There are many opinion polls and analyses that are giving extreme predictions of 2024 outcome like one from Parakala Prabhakar predicts ~150 seats for BJP and some others predict 375. Coming from a family of politicians .Without any prejudice let me explain how the process works and how to get a correct sense of the election. Thumb rules: I will give a detailed explanation later, but please keep these rules in mind. 1. Elections are won by grassroots cadres who bring voters to the voting booth. You cannot win elections unless that happens.

1. Voters vote in their best interest and they have clarity on that and the illiterate/poorly educated ones have better clarity. Voters are not stupid or could be fooled or people's mandate can be stolen.
   
2. वक़्त करता है परवरिश बरसों, हादसा एक दम नहीं होता : Things doesn’t happen all of a sudden, it happens over a while. Likewise, people don’t change their minds just because X incident has happened. Let's say on a weighing scale while pouring peanuts on one pan, on the 100th peanut scale tilts on its side so we cannot categorically say that the 100th peanut was historic or there is something special about it.
   
3. Media and money cannot buy votes.
   
4. EVMs cannot be hacked/manipulated.
   
5. In God we trust, others bring data.
   

Let’s say you go to a Mercedes showroom and say to the salesman that you have a strong feeling that I should own this Mercedes and even all my friends feel the same. You are not going to get that Mercedes unless the sum total of the money in your bank is more than what the price of the car. If not, then the salesman would ask you to get lost, the same thing you should tell anyone who analyses something based on their feeling. This is why analysis of Parakala P can be dismissed as he has mentioned in the beginning that it is his feeling.
Next in line are charlatans like Yogendra Yadav who with their sweet talk mix data with their feelings. He is taking data from previous elections and mixing his feelings to predict the outcome. I would trust the analysis of Pradeep Gupta or News24 Today’s Chanakya. These people have a very high rate of predicting election outcomes correctly, we need to understand their methods and how they can predict them correctly.
To understand their methods, we must first understand how people arrive at a decision to vote for a specific party.
Every party has 3 distinct types of voters:

1. Core voters: These voters will vote for a given party even if the sun rises in the west. A classic example is BSP. Its core voters are the SC/ST community and without any effort or presence in media or SM in the 2022 UP election, they got ~13% vote. Every major party has 10-20% (of the total eligible voters).

The core voter base will vote for a party even without a leader, even if leaders engage in crimes or corruption, it doesn’t matter. Long back I asked an old man who would vote for in a gram panchayat polls? He said, Indira Gandhi. At that time, I thought the old man was delusional however, I now understand that he voted for Congress because he felt obligated to vote for Indira Gandhi even if she died 3 decades ago. A core voter feels a lifetime obligation towards a specific party for any specific incident that has changed their life. E.g. Core voters of Shiv Sena voters vote because Shiv Sainiks saved their lives in the riots post Babri demolition or BSP voters vote for Kanshi Ram because he educated them about their constitutional rights and gave them a dignified life.

1. Loyal voters: These voters are loyal to a specific party/leader however, they have a defined fault line and if their party/leader crosses that fault line they vote against that party/leader. E.g. a BJP voter has a fault line of Hindutva or nationalism and if they feel that fault line is crossed they would vote against BJP to express their anger because that fault line is crossed. As long as the fault line is not crossed the party/leader engaged in crime or corruption doesn’t matter. The percentage of loyal voters changes each election, but you cannot win unless you have ~15-20% loyal voters. Floating voter: This voter would vote based on his criteria and perception however this kind of voter is usually in the range of 5% of the total voters. Core voters form the bulwark of the party and support the party voraciously even at it’s lowest point, these voters keep the party alive in its bad days, but you cannot win the elections without the support of the loyal voters. These voters along with the floating voters help the party cross the finish line which is usually 30-45%. When an incumbent party loses elections with a major loss, it usually means the loyal voters have voted against them. Floating voters matter when there is regime change because, in that kind of a fight, every vote counts. Bhau Torsekar , a Marathi journalist had accurately predicted 2014 and 2019 results without any survey and wrote books on he arrived at these figures. Let me summarise his methodology. He has identified swing seats, i.e. a constituency where the difference between the 1st and 2nd candidate should be less than 15% or BJP had won that seat in recent part, which he calls fight seats, i.e. seats where a party has a realistic chance of winning. That number was close to 300 and with Modi as PM candidate and Amit Shah as strategist of UP state that swing of 15% was achieved and in some cases even more and that is how the majority was won. Anyone who was closely involved in that election would know what fever was there to elect Modi. I personally remember that my family members who were loyalists of Congress had been angry with Congress since 90s and would say that they would now vote for Vajpayee just before going to vote and for Congress. Despite the disgruntlement and a charismatic leader like Vajpayee, they voted for Congress. The breaking point came when the Congress leadership behaved in a very high-handed manner with my Uncle and refusing to meet him, which was considered as a big insult by his supporters. BJP leadership grabbed the opportunity with both hands, had a series of meeting and scales were titled in 2014 election. 5 lakh voters switched from Congress to BJP and they became loyal voters of BJP. This fever I had seen in my colleagues and neighbours. With all the scandals of the world, bad publicity and wide-scale protests, Modi’s allure, and Shah’s micromanagement, unprecedented rise of 8% in the polls, the BJP’s vote share rose by just 12%. For India alliance to come tilt the scales, they will have to raise their vote share by at least 10% and I see no signs of that happening. Having disgruntled voters is one part, but disgruntled voters are not going to switch parties unless the opposition has addressed all the needs of the voters. Predicting 2024 elections: Please watch this video before making any opinion. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hwnnn1M-T5U . Here Shekhar Gupta speaks his observations on how he saw that Modi was able to deliver social benefit schemes to people( meanwhile he was making videos onhow bad modi's defeat would be in 2014 elections.) .

Most voters in India are directly dependent on the government’s social benefit schemes and it used to be a struggle to get those benefits from Sarkari babu. Modi turned the tables and made the Sarkari Babu struggle to deliver the promised benefit. The voters is mostly voting for his issues like water, food, social justice, and security. He is not bothered by Modi being a dictator or a democracy in danger. For them, issues can range from getting 5 Kg of free rice to road from village to highway. If that is done he is happy to vote for the leader who has done that.
Please take these factors into account.

1. 55 swing seats are there for BJP.
   
2. The vote share of the India alliance will fall. Why? Because the cadre is leaving these parties.
   
3. The vote share of the BJP will rise because the above cadre has come to the BJP. Tag this with streamline and tight control of central leadership.
   

While most people will call Amit Shah as Chanakya, I see him as a top class administrator who has set processes for the BJP karyakartas to execute their task which is mind-boggling. These guidelines come with minute details like font size. There are leaders like Amit Shah or better in other parties however, they have not given a thought of putting down their experience on paper making guidelines, creating a robust feedback system, etc. You can consider BJP like McDonald's which has detailed processes to replicate the success in every franchise, while the other parties are like top restaurants in your city which are top class where they operate but cannot take their success beyond that restaurant because they have not made their restaurant process oriented.
The best-case scenario for BJP is 355 however, 325 would be a rational figure.

I remember when I first heard about Dungeon Meshi. It was just a show that was coming up for Winter this year. I had never heard of the show prior to this, and based on the premise and PVs, I thought it'd just be another fantasy show that didn't really need to be a fantasy. Or one of those shows that use Fantasy like a skin because that's what sells.
I remember expecting it to be something similar to Campfire Cooking in Another world. I mean, the title "Delicious in Dungeon" Doesn't really tell me much.
The only seriously noteworthy thing I found about the show was "Oh, it's by Studio Trigger a pretty famous Studio," also I just realized this is the first Studio Trigger show I've seen. Another thing being during the KV reveal, soooo many people were talking about how this is one of if not their favourite manga of all time. And I was just like... huuuh??? I've never even heard of this manga, but somehow, everyone who's read it holds it on such a high regard. Also the fanbase (prior to the anime blowing up) seemed pretty chill.
I remember watching the first episode and thinking, aw, that's pretty nice.
I thought it had better world building and set designs than Campfire Cooking, but Campfire had the better looking food. Looking back, it's almost nothing like Campfire cooking aside from the food, but back then, I still had that expectation going into it.
By that point, I was also getting a bit of an anime burnout so I was ready to drop it once I got to the halfway 13 episode mark. It was better produced than a lot of other anime out there, but nothing about the story was really gripping.
I forgot what exactly pushed me to continue, but I will say, it's definitely not the Manga Readers who kept half spoiling during every episode discussion. Nevertheless, I kept going.
I think the closest comparison I can think of with my experience with this show is Fullmetal Alchemist. I wasn't really hooked early on, but before I knew it, when I reached a certain episode and looked back, I was already hooked.
Dungeon Meshi is probably my favourite Fantasy Anime the past 2 years. I'm pretty sure Next year's crunchyroll anime awards will have Frieren win, but man- Dungeon Meshi is just a whole different experience.
The world building in this show is phenomenal. It feels so rich and vast and the way they explain the "science" behind everything makes it feel more like a nature's documentary episode than a fantasy show. You forget these things aren't real and it starts to look more like a possibility.
The "food" are also insanely creative. The delicacies they can cook up with pretty much any creature can make you salivate. The frogs having protective skin against poisonous vines, the muscles living inside the hollow armours, the dragon sack containing gas and their mouths having a "click" to spark it. It's brilliant! This show is absolutely brilliant!
And it's not just the world building that makes this show feel so alive. How the author manages to balance out the perspectives of so many interesting characters and give them depth is fascinating to watch. Not just the main character's party, any and all characters introduced, even outside of that adds something. They feel like they can exist in their own story. It makes you think of the "everyone is the protagonist of their story" line. Kabru is- Just talking about it makes me hype! I love how he overanalyses people. The way he deduced a lot of Laois' party's movements were downright scary much like a certain scene in an Episode of Oshi no Ko (OnK watches, you know the episode), it reminded me of that!
I think the moment "world building" becomes just great for me is when I can feel the world existing outside of the characters. I felt this way with Frieren, Mushoku Tensei, Made in Abyss, The Lord of the Rings, Re:Zero, and now ofc, Dungeon Meshi.
But... yeah, I think Dungeon Meshi is my definitive pure fantasy show OAT now. I have not yet read the manga, I'm only an anime watcher, but even if they continue just this quality with the anime, I know I'll be giving this show a good 10/10 in my list.
Also to compare it a bit more with Frieren. I find it really fascinating. I know comparing two shows is generally frowned upon because both shows should be judged with their own merits and whatnot, but since I view these two as absolute 10/10's and both acting as pure fantasy, I can't help but want to compare them seeing how different my experiences were.
For Frieren, I already gave it a 10/10 in my list, but it feels like a completely different type of Fantasy from Dungeon Meshi. If I were to say, Frieren does more in the way of using the fantasy element to tell a human story. It feels more like a life anime using the fantasy setting as a tool. Frieren herself being the best example of this. The author using an elf to explore the long life of Frieren outliving her comrades and how that affects her.
Dungeon Meshi, on the other hand, feels like fantasy is the center of the story. It's not a tool to tell a story, the fantasy world is the story. Every day we just learn more and more about this world in a way that goes deeper than most other fantasies are willing to do. Reading through the pages is enough to tell you that the author loves the world they built, they have so much to say and so many things to share. Instead of the Fantasy being used to serve the characters, here we have the characters feeling like they're here to serve the world.
We also see all the characters serve a different aspect in exploring the world
Laios is here to tell us everything we need to know about the monsters. Marcille Teaches us the magic system. Chilchuck explores the sociopolitical side of the world as well as the "rules" and culture around adventuring. Of course, Senshi is here to tell us all about how to cook good food.
They all work together to teach us more about the world so every episode, we always come out with something new. It's SO FUCKING GOOD!
Anyway, rant over. Dungoen Meshi peak, you should go watch it if you haven't already.
Ah- one more thing, seems like Frieren's usage of its magic system or world building(?) is more on the soft side of the spectrum while Dungeon Meshi goes HARD on it.

Hey everyone, have you noticed that there is no way in most states to actually grow your book? You can buy leads, sell business, renew business, but if you don’t hit VRC in a quarter you’re pretty much done. Not sustainable. ESPECIALLY PAID FOR A BOOK OF BUSINESS.
There’s no way to buy a book and grow book value unless you are a Prime agent yet in order to be Prime you have to be prime in combination with the agency you’re trying to buy. How is that even possible for 98% of the agents stuck with this pile of crap company? If you have any debt then you can forget about it because you’ll always be swimming uphill.
They’ve set it up so that we have to sell at least 5 life and business accounts each quarter in order to make renewal commission that is barely livable.
Even better…if a life policy drops off within the first 13 months then it puts you in the negative for that quarter so you have to dig out of a hole just to make any kind of renewal commissions on polices that you’ve already sold in other lines.
How is anyone affording staff these days? It’s damn near impossible to afford a staff and they keep cutting our pay? Is this even legal to control us like employees and require us to sell and hit quotas?
We’re supposed to be 1099 aren’t we? That’s an independent contractor yet we’re required to sell certain levels of insurance? I don’t understand how this flies. How can we be penalized on our renewal commission on personal lines if we don’t sell enough life and business insurance?
How is this even allowed or acceptable? Looking for someone to help me understand this. It’s crippling us and seems completely wrong.
Any feedback is greatly appreciated if you’ve got something that is working!

Replaying the trilogy for the first time in easily a decade, largely because I found this sub as a matter of fact. Everyone talking about how brutally difficult Jak 2 was, and I was steeling myself for a struggle.
Well, just beat Jak 2, and the sparse checkpoints were a pain in the ass occasionally, but I don't really remember dying more than twice in any particular mission. (Okay, except the palace hoverboard platforming section... that one was indeed pretty rough, I fell to my death like 5 times due to hoverboard-related bullshit lol.)
Overall? Not that bad. I think the skill minimum is much higher than a lot of modern games, how well you have to do to progress. But the skill cap of modern games is much higher, how well you can do and still have it make a difference. Maybe it's because I jumped straight from the first game to the second? I think ironically the canon explanation for the first game is pretty accurate, it was indeed excellent training to prepare myself for the trials of the second game lol.

So I got a kitten for my 17th birthday yesterday (her name is Mitsy and she's the cutest little thing ever!) and she's also my first ever pet so I'm really worried that I'm gonna screw something up and to hopefully avoid that I have a few questions! She's 6 months and 3 weeks btw
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1. How often should I change the litterbox? I've been doing it immediately after my kitten uses it but I'm pretty sure that's not necessary.
2. Is it okay for her to be licking her stitches from her desexing surgery thingy? I assumed it wouldn't be okay but the pet store I got her from didn't seem to care too much about it since she wasn't wearing a cone. Also, I'm not sure how old the stitches are but I have to take her to the vet in two weeks to get them removed if that matters
3. She keeps trying to eat her litter (its absorbing litter) and I keep trying to distract her and/or firmly telling her 'no' and getting her to drop it but I'm not sure how to get her to stop completely or even if this is normal behaviour. It's probably super dangerous though
4. Mitsy keeps randomly making a weird croaking sound and it's probably just a hairball but she also ate a dust ball a few hours ago before I was able to stop her and she ate something crunchy (probably litter) that I couldn't see a little bit after that, but like. I'm still a bit scared.
5. I'm keeping the litterbox and food and water in my bedroom along with Mitsy for now because my Nanna doesn't want her wandering around the house at night, but I'm planning to move it all to the bathroom when she gets accustomed to my house and we get a cat fence for my Nanna's bedroom (she dislikes cats, the absolute monster!), but I was thinking that keeping the litterbox in my room is a bad idea and I feel kind of guilty about having her locked in my room all night and her waking up before me and probably wanting to explore and play
6. Any tips on getting kittens to feel more comfortable around stairs? I want to let her know that downstairs is okay too (she seems to be okay upstairs now) and I've been trying to coax her down one step at a time using treats but its not really working. I also don't want to pick her up because I don't want to accidentally touch her stitches and hurt her.
7. Since Mitsy is already litter trained, its okay for me to give her treats whenever right? And on a similar note, is it normal for kittens to avoid treats when they're in a new home?
8. She hasn't done anything 'bad' yet, but when she does, what's a good way of teaching her not to do that? I don't want to yell at her or spray her with water or anything because that's mean and I want to be a nice cat mum and she doesn't know any better
9. Is getting a cat harness worth it? I'm never going to let her out into the backyard or outside because of how easy it is for her to run into a possibly not so friendly cat or escape the backyard which is literally bordering a road that has a lot of cars and she doesn't know the area so she can't find her way back home. I'm thinking that maybe I can take her on walks like a dog but my family said that's stupid so I'm not sure
10. I've been playing with her a lot with a feather toy (sorta, its actually a star on a string and it had a moon as well with bells but those came off) and she keeps jumping really high and twisting in midair which looks like it should be painful because of the stitches (can you tell I'm really worried about the stitches?) but maybe she's just really good at hiding pain?

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I think that's it, please please please answer even one of these if you can and any assorted kitten raising tips are greatly appreciated!

Red: 7th-4th, possibly higher but unlikely, needs a very specific game order and huge pop offs. I don’t really know what this team’s strengths are, but they definitely will have some under purpled.
Orange: 6th-3rd, possibly higher because I have no idea how good Mogswamp is. This team is very well rounded, with Acho being a strong Pvper and Scott being a strong team game player. They could get top 2 if Scott gets the gay buff and gets top 10.
Yellow: 1st-4th, one of the strongest and most well rounded teams in the event. Mysti and Krinios is a scary duo in most of the individual games and sniff and especially Kara last Mcc have shown they can step up when needed. I think a movement based game order helps them but any order wouldn’t be bad.
Lime: 1st-5th, pretty similar to yellow but maybe a bit more pvp oriented where yellow is more movement oriented. Walli and 5up is a scary duo, this team will probably do very well at bb and meltdown. A bit bigger of a range since 5up can get tilted, but I don’t see that happening today.
Green:10th-6th, sykunno honestly has a pretty solid track record, pulling off some pretty good stuff in his events. Dave has been doing great lately, but this event is going to be very team based. I could see them approaching top half if Dave leads them to a good battle box and meltdown late. They have a big range since I have no idea how good two of the members are.
Cyan: 1st-3rd, this team would be strong in most canon events, let alone a low powered non canon event. They’ve got pretty much everything you could ask for in a team, Jojo is a great leader in team games, Hannah and Jojo are both great at individual games (and are the strongest duo this event), but where they really shine is their two support players in Aimsey and Pearl, who are two of the best support players who can both keep morale and vibes high and have their pop off moments. I don’t see this team placing below 4th in any game unless something very unlucky happens.
Aqua: 7th-4th, possibly higher with a velvet and gem pop off. A bit of a wildcard, but Ant is a great player and leader, and his teammates all have pop off potential into a high placement. Once again I’m not really sure what their strengths are, but they Will definitely have some under ant’s leadership.
Blue: 10th-7th. Another wildcard, mostly due to TapL who could get top 5 or bottom 20. Shubble and Gumi are also very capable of top 15 having achieved so recently. I personally just don’t think they’re gonna sweat it and will focus on fun. Nothing wrong with that
Purple: 10th-7th, I know hrry and itlw are both very good, but I just don’t know enough about the other two. This team could do unexpectedly well, I have no clue.
Pink: 1st-4th. A very strong team, especially at the games that favor having 4 solid players. Battle box and pkt and Tgttos should be great for them. They will probably get a lot of team bonuses. This I the only team where I could see 3 players in the top 10 if they pop off hard.

I’ve been having noticeable low iron issues for about 5 years now and I’m just now starting to go to a hematology appointment on the 18th of June.
Ive never had this much anxiety in my life. Especially the past 3-4 years my anxiety has been through the roof for absolutely no reason. I can’t go out and do anything anymore because my anxiety has me thinking I’m going to pass out (one of my biggest fears) or have a medical emergency due to my low iron (again one of my biggest fears). I get light headed, dizzy, my body starts shaking, my heart starts racing just for being in the grocery store. I’ve always been an extrovert. Now I never want to leave my house. And it’s been ever since my iron has significantly dropped.
Has anyone else experienced anything like this? And if you have and you got iron infusions did you go back to yourself? And if so how long did it take? I just want to be back in my normal always wanting to go out and do things with no fear self and it feels like Im never going to get that back 😥.

The demand for online education has skyrocketed in a society going more and more digital. This is an incredible opportunity for educators and content developers.
In the world of online education, websites like Udemy, LearnWorlds, and Kajabi are well-known.
Every platform has a distinct combination of features that it offers, from powerful tools for creating courses and analytics to marketing and community building capacities.
Whether you’re an academic institution, a creative worker, or an enterprise, the range of platforms caters to varied needs. It is crucial that instructors are knowledgeable about the advantages and disadvantages of each platform.

Best Place To Sell an Online Course

• Learnworlds – Best Place To Sell an Online Course, the default choice
• Udemy – Suitable for large companies
• Kajabi – Suitable for designers

This post seeks to give you a thorough overview of the most well-liked online course selling platforms, illuminating their features, costs, and course kinds that you may offer so that you can choose the best option for your needs and experience.

Learnworlds

LearnWorlds is a feature-rich online course platform that enables instructors to design, market, and sell their courses. The platform has many features out of the box, like customisable certificates, an integrated social network, and interactive video.
In addition, it has several third-party tool integrations, the capacity to generate assignments and quizzes, and the ability to engage students with interactive ebooks.
LearnWorlds provides distinctive features, such as integrated social networking and interactive video, for course developers who prioritize interactive and captivating content. Student happiness and engagement can be greatly increased in this way, which is important for course success.
Course producers may offer a more comprehensive and organized learning experience with its configurable assignments, quizzes, and certificates.
Flexibility in organizing and promoting courses is also made possible by the platform’s broad third-party interfaces.
Important features include tasks, integrations, certificates, interactive films, and quizzes.
Get today Learnworlds

Advantages include

• incredibly engaging course material
• an integrated social network for fostering community.

Cons

• Basic plans have a higher learning curve for new users.
• Monthly and transaction fees.

Selling points include business, technology, health, lifestyle, and education.

Cost

• $299 for the Learning Center,
• $299 for the Pro Trainer, and $29 for the Starter.
• A 30-day free trial is what a free demo trial offers.

In summary, LearnWorlds is a great platform for developers seeking community development and involvement.
Knowing something is not only powerful in the digital era, but it may also lead to profitable commercial ventures. People all across the world are ready to learn, and your knowledge could serve as a lighthouse for countless others. Never allow hesitancy to stop you.
Take the step to create a course and you and the many interested minds waiting for your insights will discover a world of possibilities.
It’s time to spread knowledge, educate, and thrive!
Simply said, you’re in good hands with LearnWorlds.
Get today Learnworlds

Udemy

Advantages of Udemy

• planned, prescriptive process for creating courses
• innate audience on Udemy
• Not much design or editing is required.

Drawbacks of Udemy

• steep revenue-sharing schedule
• Video is necessary.
• To provide paid courses, one must apply and be accepted.

Cost on Udemy

Udemy charges a revenue share of 63% on all other course sales and 3% on courses made through instructor coupons. It is free to publish free courses that include less than two hours of video. (Note: Mobile platform fees for sales of mobile courses, as well as processing costs from PayPal or Payoneer, are not included in revenue sharing.)
Why are you offering your first course on Udemy? due to the platform’s abundance of resources for developing and promoting courses.
For instance, if you’re not sure whether your video courses are up to par, you may send in a sample for evaluation.
You’ll receive comments on the audio and video, as well as equipment recommendations.
Additionally, Udemy offers a helpful Teaching Center with instructions on topics like organizing a course, shooting your first video, and other related subjects.
Udemy’s customized marketing courses can help if you’re having trouble closing your first few transactions.
Take advantage of site-wide discounts, have your course highlighted in their email blasts, or sign up for Udemy’s affiliate marketing program.
Udemy gets a cut of course sales; all of these programs are optional. The promotional channel you select will determine how much they take.
Because of the scale of the marketplace you’re competing with, it’s critical that you choose the ideal course topic and evaluate how it compares to other courses on the site using Udemy’s marketplace insights.
This function, which is akin to Google Analytics, provides information on a topic’s popularity on Udemy, search volume, and related keywords.
Additionally, you may view the quantity of courses that are currently available for a given subject, the category’s highest-earning courses, the monthly revenue earned, and the most effective channels for promotion (Udemy search, Udemy discovery, external sources, and paid ads).

Kajabi

Expert designers would benefit most from using Kajabi, one of the most upscale online course platforms.
Kajabi might not be for you if you are a novice or a small business owner.
On the other hand, this is the ideal location if you are an experienced designer looking to start an online academy. This platform even has Amy Porterfield’s endorsement!

Kajabi’s features

• Infinite landing sites
• Advertising emails without limit
• 1000 active members and 10,000 contacts
• One website Usable templates
• Automations
• Assessments (tests and questionnaires)

cost

• Basic, which costs $119
• Growth, which costs $159
• Procosts $319 per month (annual memberships are also an option)

The ability to build webinar pipelines is an intriguing feature shared by all of the options.
It also has fantastic marketing options, like expertly branded messaging, because it caters to huge edupreneurs.
The cost is somewhat more than that of the other platforms on this list, but for some users, the attentive, knowledgeable support staff can make up for it.
They could have made the digital offering more varied for the price they ask by including some possibilities, such as vFair’s event gamification tool, but they don’t.
The website may seem overly technical because it was designed with specialists in mind, which may discourage novice course developers from using it.
Overall, it is a costly and comprehensive LMS supplier, according to its reputation.

Greetings. First, I must admit that I am playing since the release of the app, but I am still very confused on how to be somewhat decent regarding everything related to dishes, ingredients and ingredient Pokémon. I have many questions.
Let's say a new week rolls in and I'm given a type of dishes. I am not sure of the following question because I don't remember being explicitly stated by the game, but some dishes give more power than others, right? But how do I determine which ones are the more valuable ones? Is it simply the ones who need the most base ingredients? By that I mean, even if I am to fully fill the pot with ingredients, would a dish that asks for 30 apples be stronger than one with 5 apples? (Making up recipes for the sake of argument)
After that, the next question becomes: how do I build a team around specific dishes? Do I go with a full ingredient team? Is it okay to really build something around dishes in spite of berry/skill Pokémon? I don't know how to plan around it, let alone if I have to plan it.
Regardless of the previous question's answer, the biggest question for me is: what makes a good ingredient Pokémon? By now, I pretty much know what subskills are good on each type of Pokémon, but it is unclear to me what I should be looking for when it comes to ingredients, because most Pokémon can have up to 3 different ingredients. What to do here? Should I try to get ingredient Pokémon with "solo" ingredients, that way I am sure to get that specific ingredient? Or should they be as diverse as possible? I am confused. For info, I know that lv60 has yet to be unlocked, but I want to count the lv60 ingredient because we're not too far off from getting it...
I have so many questions and I probably even forgot some but that's the gist of it, I hope I have been clear enough with my questions. Thank you very much for helping me.

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Intro (Timestamp: 1:47) - Rachel: Welcome back to another episode of Rachel Goes Rogue. This is your host, Rachel Savannah Leviss. Today, we are talking about part three of the Vanderpump Rules reunion. - Rachel: It has finally come to an end, season 11. It's been a long time coming, and we're here to react. I have my producers with me, and as usual, they will be asking me some questions to get my perspective on what we just watched during the reunion.
Well, first of all, I want to start off with asking you just your overall thoughts on the reunion, watching it. How do you feel? (Timestamp: 2:19) - Rachel: Overall, I just feel tired at this point. I don't enjoy watching this show, and (Rachel starts to get emotional) I'm just happy that it's over. It was good that they didn't talk about me very much this last episode, part three. - Rachel: That's great, but it's been really difficult watching each week. And I feel like I can finally start to move on from all of this, because it's been really difficult. It was really heavy and sad. - Rachel: And I think everyone on that cast is struggling. And I would be too if I was there. I mean, I'm struggling just watching it from the sidelines, so I can only imagine what it's like being on that stage.
So you're getting really emotional right now. Where is this emotion coming from? (Timestamp: 3:28) - Rachel: It's coming from a place of feeling like I haven't had much room to go. Feeling like stuck between a rock and a hard place, so to speak. Because this entire time, I have been preparing for them to slander my name, to paint me in the worst light. - Rachel: And my goal with this podcast was to be able to represent myself, to defend myself, to share what I've learned through my time that I took away and my recovery, and just to shed more light on the situation. - Rachel: And it hasn't been easy. It's been an extreme rollercoaster of emotions in a lot of different phases, getting sucked back into it, and then feeling like all consumed by all the comments and everything, and then completely cutting off communication with the outside world and living in my own reality in the moment. It's all about that balance, and it has not been easy to move on. - Rachel: I don't think it's been easy for any of the cast to move on rehashing it and talking about it and having other people tune in. It's not typical. It's not normal. And the day has finally come that the show, season 11, is over, and it's a relief to me because I don't have to keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. - Rachel: I don't have to think about what lies they're going to spread about me, and I don't have to think about what I need to defend myself about. And then following week, I feel like I can finally start to live my life again.
And so you're kind of talking about the boundaries that you've been setting by staying away and cutting people off, which obviously boundaries was a really big topic at the reunion. You obviously set some really strong ones by not returning to the show. What's your take on this discussion of boundaries? Do you agree with Lala or do you side more with Ariana when it comes to boundaries when it's in regard to filming the show? (Timestamp: 5:40) - Rachel: I could see both of their points of view. Setting a boundary for yourself is not an easy thing to do. And when other people are upset that you set a boundary for yourself, that's usually a telltale sign that that person is using you in some way and is not happy that you have this new boundary because it's not serving them. - Rachel: So, I can see why Ariana upholded her boundaries by not speaking to Tom, even though she actually did film with Tom this whole season, or for the later part anyway. But she refused to have that conversation with Tom at the end of the show, and I commend her for it because it would have been a fake conversation. You could tell that Tom, his only motive to having that conversation with her is for camera purposes and storyline purposes. - Rachel: Therefore, it's not an authentic conversation. It would have been crocodile tears, the whole thing. And I completely understand Ariana walking away. I walked away too, and people weren't happy about that either. - Rachel: For Lala's point of view, I can understand her perspective in wanting to have a good TV show for her livelihood and the longevity of her career. If you're going to commit to filming, then I can see why Lala is upset, because you are not only committing to filming with this person, I can see her point in that she is living under the same roof as Tom. - Rachel: They're living together, they're filming together, yet in Lala's eyes, Ariana is being stubborn by not filming with Tom, or that one scene. Who even cares about that one scene? I don't know. - Rachel: It's all so silly to me, but boundaries are important. I was in a place where I didn't have boundaries, and I was really trying to appease production and put on a good show. That became my priority season 10.
And where do you think the line needs to be drawn, you know? When at the end of the day, this is a paycheck and this is a job, versus this is someone's real life. You've talked a lot about wanting to live in reality. Where do you think that line should be drawn? (Timestamp: 8:32) - Rachel: I think that's an impossible question to answer when you're filming a reality TV show, because the line is so blurry, it's impossible to know what's real and what's not. And the more I'm out of it, the clearer I can see that. We see it with Tom Sandoval when he talked about production. - Rachel: He did the New York Times article, and he stopped talking mid sentence when a plane flew over or a truck drove by, whatever it was, because the audio, typically when we're filming a show and a plane flies by, you stop talking so that the audio can pick up normally without the distraction in the background. - Rachel: So it's like programmed in your mind to think a certain way, to act a certain way, to talk a certain way, to pursue certain things, where it becomes a part of your patterning. We also see the lines get blurred with Scheana and the comment section, and what is real life and what is not, what is her own true motivation for doing certain things, and what is influenced by outside commentary. - Rachel: That gets so blurry, and when you're all consumed in the perception of yourself, how can you really be sure that you're operating from a place of an inner knowing? That's a boundary that's blurred. With Lala, she clearly prioritizes the success of the show because she wants to secure her paycheck, and when people are setting boundaries for themselves and it's conflicting with what she wants and what is successful in her eyes, that sparks an anger within her. - Rachel: And it's all fabricated to a certain point because the bottom line is this show. So, I think it truly is impossible to live a real life and be on a reality TV show.
So, do you think it's fair for Lala to direct that anger towards Ariana? Or do you think she should be directing it more towards the show? (Timestamp: 11:12) - Rachel: Oh, no, not at all. I don't think that it's fair that Lala is directing that anger towards Ariana because Ariana has been very clear with her boundaries since the very beginning and…
I guess if she's feeling this way, do you think maybe she should have upheld her boundaries more if she was feeling so resentful towards someone doing the same? Do you think she's feeling like she regrets things that she had said in the past? (Timestamp: 11:35) - Rachel: I think she did uphold her boundaries. I think that she feels like she hasn't been supported the same way that Ariana is being supported. And it's probably not a good feeling, but she maneuvered differently than Ariana has. And Lala doesn't extend the same empathy towards others. So it's harder to support her, I believe.
She does make a point to say, many times, that she feels like things are not being honest on camera. She points out Tom and Ariana’s relationship being one of those things. Katie has a flashback moment where she also calls it out. Do you agree that things are not always honest on camera? (Timestamp: 12:12) - Rachel: Totally. Yeah. I think the point that Lala is making is that Tom and Ariana haven't been honest about their relationship on camera. - Rachel: And I think people are getting caught up in Lala being hypocritical because she wasn't honest about her relationship with Randall. Okay, yes, that might be true. But the point is that Tom and Ariana haven't been good for quite some time. - Rachel: And their relationship that was portrayed on camera for fans to see was not an accurate representation of their relationship. I see the frustration because I agree with that too.
Even on your part, how does it affect you as someone on the show when people aren't fully honest on camera? How does that affect the rest of the cast? (Timestamp: 13:21) - Rachel: Yeah, it affects everyone when people aren't fully honest on the show. I mean, I wasn't fully honest the season 10 reunion. I was still covering up for Tom Schwartz. - Rachel: I was still covering up for Tom Sandoval. I was still going along with that narrative, and it would have been much better to just be open and honest about it. But of course, Tom was like, no, that wouldn't be good for business. - Rachel: It wouldn't be good for Schwartz and Sandys if people knew that the Schwartz kiss wasn't authentic and we need that to seem real. So it does affect everyone when you're not being honest, because it portrays a certain picture that isn't reality, and the whole point of reality TV supposedly is to be real, following these real people's lives. - Rachel: So honesty would be like the most important value characteristic you would think that everyone on this show should have. But it seems like nobody does.
Well, speaking of honesty, Ariana kind of called out Tom and his motives behind wanting to apologize on camera. He finally does get that moment during the reunion to apologize to Ariana. He has some words when he does, he calls the affair something he regrets every day. He says that he wears it like a badge of shame. On your end, how did that feel watching that? (Timestamp: 14:46) - Rachel: It's hard to tell if Tom is being honest or not. Even in the Secrets Revealed episode, when he was asked how many girls he had sex with since me, and he had to pause and think about if he was going to be honest or not, he's just been caught in so many lies that it's hard to tell if he's being truthful. - Rachel: But hearing Tom say that he regrets getting involved with me every single day, I regret it too, so it is a little bit painful, but it's also like maybe something is registering for him. - Rachel: I don't know. But then again, his actions speak a lot louder than his words. He knows what words to say, and then it seems that he fails to follow through with meaningful action. And that's where true amends come into play.
There was just, I feel like, a lot of pain in the room all around. You kind of acknowledged that at the beginning of this episode. What do you think that this pain, and even Lala saying that she was okay seeing some of those friendships end, what do you think that means for the future of this group? (Timestamp: 16:07) - Rachel: I don't see much of the future for this group. It looks pretty shattered. It looks like these friendships are not healthy friendships. - Rachel: The dynamic between Lala and Scheana is not a healthy dynamic. It seems to be like a power imbalance. It seems like Scheana is trying to appease Lala to make sure she's secure, and she's getting certain needs met in that friendship because Ariana hasn't been around for Scheana the way that she's used to. - Rachel: Yeah, you could tell that Scheana’s struggling with coping with that. It seems like Lala's really on a wavelength of not effing with anybody on the cast right now. It seems like her friendship with Katie isn't strong because Katie's gotten really close with Ariana. - Rachel: It seems like even her friendship with Scheana is a little rocky. I think she sees Scheana as someone that's not...How do I want to say this? - Rachel: And I hate saying this word, because I don't want to like categorize somebody as something, especially because I've been called this before too. But I think seeing how Lala reacted to everything and how Scheana was trying to be the fixer and appease Lala, and it just didn't seem like enough for Lala. I think Lala sees Scheana as someone who is weak, perceived weakness. - Rachel: I'm not saying that Scheana is weak. And I think that there's a lot of alliances and manipulation happening, and none of that is healthy for our friendship dynamic. I can see why the show is taking a hiatus, because it just seems so fractured
Well, it definitely seems like at the very end of the episode, Scheana was very sure to get that last word in. I felt like she was looking directly at Lala and almost begging for her to hear her out that she was on her side. And it really did seem like the very end, Scheana had to choose. Is she Team Ariana or Team Lala? Do you think she made the right choice? Do you think she needed to make a choice, or do you think that she's putting this pressure on herself? (Timestamp: 18:21) - Rachel: Ooh, that's a good question. I think she feels a lot of pressure from the outside perspective, and she doesn't want to, obviously, like burn bridges with Ariana or anything. And I think Ariana has been very gracious towards Scheana. Do I think that she needed to choose sides? I don't think so. I don't know. - Rachel: I can see Lala's frustration probably because I'm sure Sheena and Lala have had conversations about the whole situation. And without Ariana there, I'm sure Sheena's singing a much different tune than what we're hearing at the reunion, and that's sparking some frustration in Lala. And I'm sure that was a similar feeling when she called out Katie about it too. - Rachel: So yeah, I think that Lala feels pretty isolated, I want to say, in her feelings. And now that it's aired, and I did check Reddit for the first time in a very, very long time, it seems like the majority of people are hating on Lala right now. I'm human. - Rachel: I do hold some resentment towards Lala for the way that she's treated me over the years. I do empathize with her a little bit because all the hate online is just a little bit ridiculous. And I think also people are afraid to speak a differing opinion than the team Ariana side because people are just ruthless online and they don't want to hear a differing opinion. - Rachel: And if you do, then you get shunned out, too. It's very, my therapist calls it tribal shaming, where if you're not following the rules of the tribe, spoken or unspoken, then you're cast out and you're shunned.
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I mean, it does feel like the fans have had more of an impact on this season than ever. Would you agree with that? (Timestamp: 23:24) - Rachel: Yeah, especially because as they were filming this show, the fans were boots on the ground. We're going to production, we're going to filming, and we're going to take photos and document what we saw and all that stuff. Like it was very interactive in a way. - Rachel: I think with after show this year, it was a little bit different because some things have changed since the ending of filming last summer. One of the things was me starting my own podcast and speaking freely about my experience and my opinion and the after show gave the cast an opportunity to rebut what I was saying and it provided more of a context. - Rachel: And I think with more time passing from the end of filming last summer to, you know, early January, February of this year, when they filmed the after shows, cast dynamics shifted because as we all know, now watching the finale, Lala and Ariana did not end on a good note whatsoever. - Rachel: And so, you know, she had some choice of words to say during the after shows. And it seemed like she really got Sheena to support her with that.
Speaking about the fracturing of this cast, something about her did recently open. Not many cast members were in attendance to this opening. What's your take on that? (Timestamp: 24:56) - Rachel: Interesting. Do you know who went? - iHeart Lady: I know Schwartz went - Rachel: It seems a little telling that maybe Sheena and Lala aren't on the best terms with Ariana right now, because they went to like the Broadway opening that Ariana did for Chicago. And they also went to Dancing with the Stars. But this is all before they knew that she didn't watch the show. And so that was all before the reunion and everything. So yeah, it seems like maybe they're not on the best of terms right now.
What are your thoughts on production holding the last five minutes until the reunion to show to everyone? (Timestamp: 25:47) - Rachel: I wonder if they got word that Ariana wasn't watching the season. And they did that as a way to ensure that they would get a reaction from her, kind of like forcing her hand a little bit, forcing her into a situation that she did not want to be in. It was very strategic in that way. And it was something new. Like, we've never done that before. It was creative, for sure, on production's part.
Do you think it was fair to Ariana? (Timestamp: 26:27) - Rachel: There's a commitment, and part of that is watching the show and having an opinion on what's happening besides your own story that you're sharing. So in a way, it's like ensuring that Ariana did have an opinion on it. So very eye opening, to say the least.
I want your take on Tom's final words. He says, I love it. It's good for me. A lot of people in the room were very shocked by that. Tom even has a reaction to it, where he shakes his head no. They didn't even really press him on what he meant by that either. What's your take on all of that? (Timestamp: 26:49) - Rachel: I wish they pressed him on what he meant by that a little bit more. And Ariana was pretty much the only person that called him out on it too. She caught it. - Rachel: She was like, that exactly proves my point, that you are doing things for the audience, for the production value, and for his own story purposes. I guess in Tom's eyes, having Ariana refuse to film and walk off was good for him because he felt like he completed his job and fulfilled his duty with what production was asking from him. And Ariana was not. - Rachel: And I think selfishly, he probably thought that it would give him a better chance of having more of a redemption story. - Rachel: Because, ultimately, production is the one picking and choosing what they're going to share on the show and edit and put certain music behind certain scenes to make it seem even more of a certain way. Tom knows how to play into that. But I would have loved to hear what his explanation for that comment would be.
Why do you think they didn't press him? (Timestamp: 28:34) - Rachel: I think that they're protecting him, like they always have been.
We did see something interesting at the very end with Lisa stepping up and taking Ariana's side, which is kind of a different tune. You've talked about this before, where she seems to protect the guys a lot of the time, but then she changes her tune at the very end of the episode and takes Ariana's side. What are your thoughts on that? (Timestamp: 28:39) - Rachel: I think Lisa is very strategic with what she puts out there as well. And she knows what people are saying about her, with her always supporting the guys. So that could have been a motivation behind her changing her tune and supporting Ariana in that way. Yeah, I don't know. It's hard because I think also Lisa is very aware of who the fan favorites are. It's her show. - Rachel: She's an executive producer on this show. So she's not a dummy when it's coming to that. I think it helps her if she is supporting Ariana because she'll praise Ariana for walking away and end up holding her boundaries. - Rachel: But then when it comes to me, I don't even remember what she said about me. But when it comes to me walking away and setting a boundary for myself, I've been told that I'm a coward and I'm running away from my problems. - Rachel: So that part for me gets a little frustrating because it's like, and also the fans praising Ariana for upholding her boundaries and walking away and supporting her and telling her like, you know, she's outgrown this show. - Rachel: She should move on and do something even better with her life. And she's finding out now that these aren't her true friends and like good for her for upholding her boundaries and walking away from this situation. And I've done the same thing and it has been met with scrutiny.
Lala compares her situation with Randall to Ariana a lot throughout this reunion. Do you think the two are similar at all? (Timestamp: 30:37) - Rachel: I don't think that the relationship that Lala had with Randall is comparable to the situation that Tom and Ariana were in. It's hard to get on Lala's side with some of the things that she's saying, because the way that she spoke about her relationship with Randall is like bragging about doing BJs for PJs and getting gifted a Range Rover very early in their relationship and not being honest about who she was seeing and the situation that was happening basically. And it just seemed like she was in it for the money and like to secure her success and fame. - Rachel: So it's hard to get behind that, especially when she's been so outright about it. Unfortunately, Randall wasn't the stand up guy that she was selling him to be. We weren't buying it. - Rachel: In Ariana's case, viewers got to see that relationship develop over the years, whereas with Lala's, he wasn't around, like it was secret for a while. And, you know, it's harder to develop feelings towards a person or a relationship when you're not seeing it play out on camera. I think Lala has a lot of anger, maybe even towards herself, for the situation that she allowed herself to be in. And I think she might be taking that out on Ariana.
How hard is it to be really honest when you're in this position? And do you think certain cast members have an easier time doing this? (Timestamp: 32:22) - Rachel: So this is like where your own values come in. Like, are you an honest person or are you not? Because there are people in this cast that are not, and we know who they are, and they have no problem lying, and it doesn't bother them when they lie. - Rachel: And for me, I'm working towards living a more authentic, honest life. And part of that is being honest with my emotions, thoughts, and feelings, and expressing that, and doing that in a way that is still respectful, because I'm not trying to hurt people in the process. And I am trying to express myself honestly and be true to myself. - Rachel: So I think it just depends on who you're asking. I mean, it's definitely not easy. It's definitely hard because you're on this platform, this public arena where you're opening yourself up to scrutiny. - Rachel: And if other people have differing opinions than you do, or if your opinion is the minority, you're basically going to be harassed and scrutinized. And so sometimes for people, it's easier to not be fully honest with their thoughts and feelings in order to save face or in order to go with more popular opinion because it's perceived to be safer that way. But I don't know. - Rachel: At this point, it's like your words aren't going to hurt me. You can say whatever you want to say about me online, and I've survived this far. So whatever else you say about me is not going to affect me any more than it already has. - Rachel: I've developed thick skin through this process, and I've come to the point where I value my friendships that are real in the sense of I interact with these people in real life. I care more about people's perception of me when they actually meet me and interact with me and the vibes I give off that way. So you get to a certain point where it's almost your duty to show up for yourself and be honest with how you feel and how you think about a certain thing in that moment. - Rachel: And your opinions can change with time too and with more information. It's not like I'm going to say this one thing and I'm always going to feel this way. It's always changing, it's always developing, we're always getting more information, and we're always experiencing new things that change our perspective on life. - Rachel: So it's just your duty to represent yourself in the most authentic way so that your people will find you.
***ads play and podcast resumes at 38:08
Well, I think there was one kind of shining moment, I'll say, even though it was a really emotional moment. But the moment between, and this is a little bit of a pivot, but the moment between Schwartz and Katie, I found really interesting, where Andy was asking about their relationship. It seemed like this season, they had a little bit more of a playful dynamic. But Schwartz gets really emotional, saying that he doesn't regret how their relationship ended. But you can kind of see in his eyes that he tears well up. He gets really emotional. What did you make of that moment? (Timestamp: 38:08) - Rachel: We don't think we've really seen a moment like that between Tom, Schwartz, and Katie. It really seems like they've come to terms with how the relationship ended, and that it was for the best. But it seemed like there was a lot of fond memories and just appreciation for one another, that I don't think I've really seen that dynamic between them before. - iHeart Lady: To me, it seemed like in a season where there was a lot of hurt, that seemed like the one moment of maybe seeing two people that are going through the process of healing. - Rachel: Viewing that, it did seem like they were both coming from a place of healing, because they weren't throwing insults at each other or trying to bring each other down. It was very respecting one another and appreciating the moments that they did have together while it lasted. And that's refreshing to see on this show.
Lala said something at the very end where she said it was really hard for her to show up to season nine reunion, I believe it was. You know, she didn't want to talk about certain things, but she showed up. Ariana said the same thing where she could say the same about the season 10 reunion. She didn't want to be there. You could probably say the same thing about the season 10 reunion. You didn't want to be there as well. Is it fair to say everyone's been in a position where they didn't want to be somewhere, but they did anyway? (Timestamp: 39:44) - Rachel: 100%. Yeah, totally. And that's like the part of committing to this show. It's a commitment. And even though you don't quite know what you're signing up for, you know that it's not going to be necessarily easy. And there's a challenge in that. - Rachel: And I think, just speaking for myself, there was an opportunity for growth for me in that. Yeah, I think we've all been in a situation where we didn't want to show up for something and felt, I don't think obligated is the right word, but we made a commitment to being there, and we followed through with our commitment. And it's hard.
You started this episode off by acknowledging that there was a lot of healing that this cast needs to do. As someone who has taken a step back from filming, you've had this time to kind of come back to your own reality. What can this cast expect when you have that moment to kind of breathe and have that separation and you rejoin reality for a minute? (Timestamp: 41:07) - Rachel: Oh, okay. That is a loaded question. Because I think that there's a little bit of fear with not being the current topic of conversation. - Rachel: I think addiction is the wrong word, but there's a little bit of the dopamine hits that you get when you're being talked about on a reality TV show and the fear of that going away permanently could be a scary thing. But taking time off and re-centering with yourself, I think is like the best thing for this cast right now, because we don't want to be forced into situations that we don't want to be in. That's not living an authentic life. - Rachel: I mean, I've been worrying about scenes and storylines, and I haven't even been a part of this show, but now it feels good not to worry about that. And I do have to say, just like reading all the comments on Reddit right now, it's like hardly anybody is talking about me, which is a great feeling. It's just so much more freeing when you're not living your life for somebody else's entertainment anymore. - Rachel: It just feels like you get your life back a little bit. It's so complex, and I think it's hard to understand if you haven't been through being on a TV show for millions of people to comment on and judge your life. I don't think humans are meant for that, and there's no way that that's healthy. - Rachel: Yeah, I said that I think the cast, we have a lot of healing to do. We, as in, I still do too, and part of that is coming back to reality. And I really don't think that we've had a minute this whole season. I think it's going to be good for everyone.
Has this year though felt different to you? I feel like you're like half in, half out (Timestamp: 43:42) - Rachel: Oh, yeah, it's felt so different. But I think like a large part of that has to do with going to the meadows and really reconnecting with myself and learning about my issues and how it was showing up for me and really coming to terms with like, what is this piece of external validation and how is that motivating me? And is it even real? - Rachel: And just like really re centering back into myself and gaining a lot more perspective with that. Without the meadows, I would not be where I am right now. There's no freaking way. So it is. I'm living a new life. I really am. - Rachel: And I feel like I haven't really been able to truly have the opportunity to live my new life to the fullest because this show has been holding me back. And I know that that's partially my fault too because I'm indulging and speaking about it, but I'm really looking forward to the days when I can truly move forward and evolve into something even more magnificent.
Outro (Timestamp: 45:02) - Rachel: Thank you so much for listening to Rachel Goes Rogue. Follow us on Instagram and TikTok for exclusive video content at Rachel Goes Rogue Podcast.
***end

Just a bit of contect he was never involved in my pregnancy since we broke up when I was 10 weeks pregnant I let him know when we was born and he message me when can I see her.
I arrange for him to see her when she was 5 days old he didnt seem that interested in her at all he never looked at her he held her one during the few hours he saw her. He came again when she was about 2 weeks old and that when the problems started.
He constantly picked fights saying I wasn't allowing him to see her and I was a horrible mother that she's not his as she looks nothing like him etc.
When she was 3 weeks old he tried to end it twice it go that bad the police had to drag him back to the hospital, I said thats since his mental health isnt the best that's its not the best idea for him to be seeing her and we can arrange somthing for when his mental health was better I still messaged him sent in photos and we still ft when he could.
2 weeks later I got a letter though for mediation I message him and he said that his mental health was better and that even if he and said anything I would allow him to see her ( which I never did the planning wasn't the best as when he was buzy I was free amd when I was buzy he was free so him seeing her was difficult to arrange) after I decline he stopped messaging me
8 months later I put in for child support he got his sister to message me to tell me I'm a horrible person for putting in for CS when I don't allow him to see her (i never said he couldnt see her) so I message him to see if he wanted to see her and I would arrange somthing so that he wasn't on his own with her so like at a visitation centre.
We went back and forth for a few days then I asked him it not message me everyday (as all it was is him asking is she was OK and constantly comparing her to his family but when i said oh she gets that from my side of the family he would accuse me of pushing him and his family out and that im trying to turn her against him she was 9 months old at the time) he flipped out on me.
Saying how can I help and support my child if you don't allow me to message. I put back I'm not saying not message just not every day and I might be the arsehole for this but I said that asking how she is amd comparing her to your family isn't helping or supporting her.
Then he went on a rant about how much of a horrible person I am and then demanded to see her or he would take me to court to I Just put fine see you in court then during the conversation he kept trying to argue with me but I had tried to remain civil
A day later I got a call from CS as he had denied being her dad and we had to go wait for a DNA test and I had to answer some question. His family however kept messaging me about the case it was like a message or two a day which I had ignore I ended up closed the CS case as his family kept on harassing me about the DNA test
So aita for stopping him from seeing his child?

I don’t know where to start, this will be a long post. If you read through, thank you!
I first stopped speaking to my mother in 2019, I would now describe her as a covert narcissist but at the time I was just fed up with feeling like I was parenting an emotionally volatile teenager every time I spoke to her, every conversation ended in an argument and I was always to blame, always “breaking her heart”. I was an emotional (and on a few occasions as a teen, physical) punching bag and I just couldn’t take it anymore. For a few months her texts would switch between loving, heartbroken and scorned, getting meaner and meaner the longer I left them without a reply. She then started texting my boyfriend (now husband) to tell him how the no-contact was tearing her apart and giving him messages to pass on to me.
Fast forward, I fell pregnant at the end of 2021 and felt that she needed to hear the news from me. Less out of any actual desire to speak to her and more because I didn’t know what she would do if I let her hear it through the grapevine. I had read a couple of books about narcissistic parents by this point and set very clear boundaries for her. I would send her pregnancy updates and ultrasounds but I didn’t want unsolicited advice or constant phone calls and I was absolutely not prepared to hash out our “differences”. This was fine for a couple of months until is wasn’t and she stopped respecting my boundaries, called me non-stop until I answered and told me I was selfish if I didn’t want to talk. I pushed back and she told me to “have a nice life” and blocked me.
Our daughter was born 4 months later and at 4 days post-partum I got a text from her saying “I’m flying to name of my town on Friday, I don’t care if you don’t want to see me. You will show me my granddaughter through the window if you’re still not speaking to me”, I called her in hormonal hysterics while she was with friends and she answered the phone with this unnatural, sickly sweet voice and said “darling, you sound so upset what’s wrong? Do you have support at home?” It was like talking to a stranger, the thought of that phone call still sends a chill down my spine. My dad (they have been divorced for many years) eventually talked her out of the visit and she blocked me again.
This pattern has repeated itself multiple times over the past 2 years since my daughter was born, I set a boundary and she disregards it. I am selfish and she is heartbroken, she blocks me and I don’t hear anything for a couple of months. Then she begs me to unblock her so I can send pictures of her granddaughter. For clarity’s sake, I have never blocked her.
That brings us more or less to today. My family (husband, daughter, dog and I) will be moving overseas for work in about 2 months, this happened suddenly as is the nature of my husband’s job. We found out yesterday and my dad was the first person I told (we have a great relationship), he told his mom (my grandmother) and she told my mother. This morning I received multiple calls followed by a text from her telling me she’d like to have a “little chat”, reluctantly I worked up the courage to call her and she asked me straight away if we were moving overseas, I said yes. She told me “I will be coming to stay before you go” I told her that wouldn’t work, I have a lot on my plate preparing for the move and I would be lying if I said that a visit for her wouldn’t add more stress, she started to yell immediately asking “are you really so selfish that you can’t make time for your own mother?” I asked her to calm down and she said “now you’ve fucking done it, that’s it we’re done” and hung up, the whole call was less than two minutes and I hardly got a word in.
I couldn’t help it, I sat and cried for a while. As much distance as I have tried to put between us, hearing my mother speak to me that way still triggers this feeling inside of me and I revert back to this little child hiding in the corner of my room from my mom’s big feelings. I called her back and asked if we could talk calmly, my exact words were “I think your emotions are controlling you right now and I don’t want to leave things like that” unfortunately, she did not stay calm. She told me her heart was broken for me because one day my daughter would cut me off too and I’ll have regrets about the way I’ve treated my own mother, she said I am a my father’s surname through and through, that I’ve always been a selfish bitch who never thinks about anyone else’s feelings, she then told me to have a nice life (again) and that she never wants to speak to me again. She hung up after that.
I guess I just don’t know where to go from here. I feel sick and anxious and I’m not completely convinced that she won’t just turn up to my house anyway. The words “no-contact” sound so clear cut and linear but I feel like my journey has been anything but. Sometimes I think she’s right and I really am selfish for wanting distance, but accomodating her feelings constantly and mentally preparing for her next emotional tirade every few months is also affecting my ability to be present and healthy in my relationships with my own family.
I should mention that she has made no effort to take accountability for our relationship breakdown in the past 5 years. She will ask if I’m “over it yet” or resort to a disingenuous “fine, I was a terrible mother and I never did anything right” type of apology, she also laughed at me when I asked her to seek therapy if she wants any kind of real relationship in the future.
If you’ve read this far and you’re comfortable sharing, please tell me how you cope with the turbulence of no-contact or with emotionally immature parents in general. I would be so grateful to just know that I’m not alone in this.

To be clear, I did jump in near the top. I did not fully understand and was caught up in the hype. I did not really know anything about the stock, but it seemed that the momentum was unstoppable. Then it bottomed out...at .95 cents when I saw it again. Everyone rallied and kept it above a dollar. Even though I was down BIG, I held on. The more I learned thru Reddit the more I questioned what I had done. FOMO? I see that now. When the stock bottomed at 37 cents, I wondered how I could have lost 30 years of savings? If I cashed out now, I could at least have almost a years salary left. That was better than nothing. Then the price moved up to 55 cents. That was a little better. Then I started trying to find anything to convince me not to sell, but knew it was not likely. Thankfully I saw that life preserver when I saw Maximum Purpose's posts while watching Omar Gosh's last live post. I figured I owed it to myself to listen to the whole 2 and a half hours before I finally threw in the towel and sold everything I had.
THANK GOODNESS I DID WATCH IT!!! 2 and a half hours later, I knew I would not sell. If I did, I would forever regret it. After watching the video and getting a more detailed explaination, I knew I needed to HOLD and ride this out. I saw everyones positive posts, but that was not enough when combined with all the negativity everyone was pushing.
BEFORE YOU GIVE UP,...you owe it to yourself to look at the information MAXIMUM PURPOSE and OMAR GOSH put out in that last live video. If at the end of the 2 and a half hours, you still are convinced to sell, then you were never holding for the bigger purpose. HOLDING NOW WILL MAKE YOUR MONEY BACK AND MORE!!!! I understand people ARE SCARED, but PLEASE LOOK AT THE LATEST INFORMATION provided from the ones who are still holding. NOT the HATERS!!! I believe in the movement now. If you can honestly not see the bigger picture of why this squeeze will work if everyone HOLDS, then I hope you made a profit or at least didnt lose too much, so that you can look back and NOT regret selling early, and I wish you the best. But you owe it to yourself to look at the OMAR GOSH's LIVE YOUTUBE video and MAXIMUM PURPOSE's posts from FRIDAY 5/31/2024, before you give in to the negative information that has been pushed. IT IS NOT ABOUT THE VALUE OF THE STOCK AT THIS POINT.....IT IS HOLDING TO MAKE THE HEDGIES PAY FOR THE DAMAGE THEY ARE CAUSING TO EVERYONE WHO HAS INVESTED ANY MONEY AND LOST ........HOLD STRONG.

FFIE CEO Exposes Short Sellers !!! OMAR GOSH LIVE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W0qqzBAlY0o

Hey! I have 2022 Kia Seltos lease with an annual mileage limit of 15k for 3 years. However, I drive a lot due to my commute and recreation, so I am at around 42k miles with a year left. I also am not in love with the car. I knew a lease didn't fit my needs, but my dad, who has been in the car service industry for over 30 years, told me it would be fine. Now being 26 years old, I am realizing it is fine as long as I want to continually being in car debt by rolling the excess mileage costs into a new lease, which is not my end goal. That is why I am trying to get a 2nd opinion that isn't my dad nor the dealership he works for.
The current residual value is $16,637.75, and I have $5,423 left to pay in 12 lease payments. The buyout amount for this car is $22.8K. This is information I've gathered from the Kia financing website. I currently have ~730 credit score, make around 62k/yr, and can comfortably put a 5-8K down payment on something new or used. So, for the questions:
Would buying the lease be the best option? I know I would be buying out the car with 30K miles, but it actually has 42k.
If I were to get out of the lease, how much equity would I have? Would I be negative, positive or even?
I do tend to like bigger cars, although may not be realistic as of now. I have been eyeing both certified used sedans/suvs between 16,000-22,000. Would getting a 2016 larger Honda suv w/ 100,000 miles for the same price as my seltos be a decent buy? Assuming Hondas have a better track record for lasting vs. Kia.
I am hoping for a payment of $200-320/mo, but I am currently paying 451/mo. So, if that its not realistic, I have some wiggle room in the budget.
Thank you for the help and advice!

1) I hate restrictions. I hate things and relationships that make me unable to act naturally and freely. 2) I am suspicious of most things, and cannot quickly trust people or information, even if it is from fairly reliable sources, etc. 3) Confidentiality. 4) I love to learn a lot, especially if it is related to topics that interest me. 5) I always like to think rationally and logically, and I always try to be logical. 6) I am able to relate events well. 7) I don't like to depend on anyone or anything. I like to rely only on myself. 8) I prefer to be alone and do the things I love alone. 9) I like to learn through my previous experiences. 10) My style of discussion is: I listen to the other party and wait for him to complete his point of view, even if his point of view conflicts with mine. I try to understand his point of view and see the evidence and arguments. If I am convinced, this is normal, and if I am not convinced, this is normal. I am one of the calmest people in the debate and the type who does not attack, does not rush, or gets angry because the other party does not resemble my point of view. 11) The first impression of me is always that I am quiet, I don't talk much, and I am somewhat serious, and people almost avoid me at first because of my semi-serious appearance. 12) People call me cold.. 13) I don't take the initiative. 14) If I'm with people I care about, I'll talk and laugh normally, but if I don't like people, they'll see me as cold and not talking much. 15) I ignore a lot. 16) I do not like for anyone to praise me because I do not know what to do or what is the appropriate reaction to give, so I try to ignore the praise and treat myself as if I do not hear it, and if I want to say something, I will just say thank you. 17) I always hide my feelings, I do not like to show them to anyone, and I always suppress them. 18) I value personal space very much, and I do not like anyone to enter my life, nor do I like to enter people’s lives. 19) I like to help people I care about. 20) I am afraid to show people facts about me because I am afraid that people will use them against me 21) I do not like to be a leader, but if there is no leader and I see that everyone is not good at assuming the leadership position, then I donate and take it and be strict and harsh because I believe that the quality of strictness should be in a leader. 22) Care a lot about how some things work. 23) I love sports. For example, I love martial arts, I love running, I love playing football, etc., but I do not practice them because circumstances do not allow me. 24) I love scientific things such as mathematics and physics, and I love learning them and delving into them. 25) I don't make detailed long-term plans for the future. If I want to make plans, I'll make plans with bullet points or simple details, but more often than not I make plans with bullet points to the point that it's very natural for me to keep them in my head, and not have to write them down on notes or paper so I can remember them. 26) I hate emotional talk. 27) I hate physical contact. 28) I like to take things apart to see how they work and what they are made of. I don't fix it, but I would like to know how it works. 29) I don’t like compliments, so I don’t always compliment and be honest. 30) I get bored quickly sometimes. 31) I don't care about people leaving my life, this is very normal for me and I get over it very quickly. 32) I don't think about the future or the past much. Mostly, I focus on the present. 33) To be honest, sometimes I like rules and follow them, but not always. 34) I always like to search for the exact meaning of words. 35) I am always interested in developing myself scientifically. 36) I like deep and realistic thoughts. 37) I love and appreciate respect, and if I respect someone and he does not respect me, I will get angry and perhaps hurt him. 38) I do not like when others underestimate my abilities, and if someone underestimates my abilities, I try to prove my abilities to him. 39) I show my interest in a person through actions, not words. I show this by encouraging and supporting him with what he does, sharing tips, sharing my knowledge with him, asking how he is doing, helping him when he needs me, but I never like emotional talk. 40) I'm not a bit of a nervous person. 41) I know a lot about my surroundings without any effort on my part, but I do not talk about it. 42) I like to go to the library and read books there, but circumstances do not allow me to read books on the Internet. 43) I can do things even if I don't know how. I mean I can draw even though I don't know. I mean my senses are almost ready to do anything, even if I don't know. 44) I prefer to learn by myself. 45) At first people are always afraid to approach me because I look serious and sharp, but only when you get to know me. If people I feel comfortable with and care about. I will be helpful, I can be kind, I will joke with them and laugh. I'm the exact opposite when I'm with people I don't feel comfortable with and I don't care about them. 46) If someone asks for an opinion on something, I will give him my advice based on my previous experiences, analysis of the situation, and the information I have on this topic. 47) I hate being controlled by people. 48) I have good self-confidence. 49) I love realistic and tangible things, and I can use my senses with them, and I love applying them to reality if they can be applied to reality. 50) I like isolation and do not like meeting people. 51) I don't laugh a lot, but I smile and not a lot either. 52) Almost everyone around me says I'm complicated. 53) I do not like noise, loud voices, and screaming. 54) I don't cry much and it's rare for me to do so. 55) I have a kind of apathy. 56) When I am with myself, I feel comfortable, entertained, and happy, unlike when I am with others. 57) I don't care about the things that surround me if they don't interest me. 58) I hate memories, and if people give me a memory, I will throw it away. The thing is, I hate memories and I hate making memories in general. 59) I have a fairly good sense of humor, but it doesn't show to anyone and doesn't always show. 60) I don't complain, I hate complaining, and I hate people who complain a lot. 61) I have an obsession with education and knowledge. I'm literally afraid that I won't be able to think logically and correctly because I don't have enough knowledge, so I love learning and I love knowledge. 62) Maybe I am mysterious and I keep many things in my life and do not reveal them. 63) Not committed most of the time. 64) I don't care about criticism. 65) I never, ever give up, whenever I fail, I try again. 66) I have a little bit of narcissism and a little bit of paranoia to a degree that is not always obvious. 67) One time a family member told me that you always answer me (it's normal, it's not a problem, I don't know....) My answers are like this because the topic does not interest me. This means that if something doesn't matter to me, I can't pretend that I do. 68) I was described as not caring about people’s feelings, cold and very frank, not interested in relationships, quiet, mysterious, flexible in speech, with a courageous personality, good at school, intelligent and introverted.
Note: I will take your opinions as a guess only because no one knows themselves better than themselves.