That unblocks everything

Strap in, this will be a long one.
I was with my ex for 7 months when I was 17. I had a crush on him for so long before that when we go together it was like a dream come true. For the most part, the relationship was great but he was pretty toxic towards the end and it was a slow, dragged out breakup.
We kept in contact on and off for the next 3 years, occasionally hooking up.
The last time we spoke (almost 5 years ago) he told me he loved me and he wanted us to be together. At the time I told him we wanted different things from life and we haven’t spoken since, he blocked me on everything.
I am in a relationship and have been for 4 years with the most amazing, supportive partner. We have a child together. Our relationship isn’t the same since our child was born and I don’t feel as close to him as I did.
A couple of weeks ago, a Facebook memory came up and I noticed that I was no longer blocked by my ex. Obviously I went onto his profile and since then I haven’t stopped thinking about him.
It’s driving me crazy that he unblocked me, I want to know why but I know I can’t speak to him because it feels unfair on my partner and it could potentially ruin my life (not an exaggeration)
I don’t know what I want people to reply to this, I guess I just needed to get it out and make sense of why I feel like this. I feel full of anxiety and guilt, even though I’ve done nothing wrong.
H e l p

Hi I (21, female) to get closure from my ex best friend. I was best friends with her since high school. I had a group of friends that we created in high school. Okay so full story is that, there was a guy who liked to flirt and harassed people to the point they were uncomfortable. My ex best friend came to me about this and we had our paragraphs moments back and forth. She started to trauma dump me about everything. I told her I’ll talk to this guy about it and make him apologize to the people he has harassed and set up boundaries. When she trauma dump me I felt overwhelmed because yes I want to help out my friends who are being harassed by this person. He a grown ass guy that should know what are the wrong and rights. Then I had friends leaving me because I was “friends” with the guy who liked to harassed people. I never said I was friends with him. But any ways I wanted to know that part of this semi story. To know the full context.
My best friend and I would talk about everything. The thing is everyone knew she was a bit toxic in her way but I didn’t see it. (Just to let you know I suck recognizing at who bad or good at people.) Until my boyfriend pointed it out to me what she been doing to me and making me feel. Every time I was near her I would feel drained or I would be upset because I felt stressed around her. The group we had were kind of like hypocrites, can’t say that but they can. Like if the gay can say the f word but other gay can’t say it because it wrong. Bad example, but we been having her and I problems. That I haven’t been hanging out with her but when I want to hang out with her she would cancel last minute. She would have a problem with my boyfriend. Saying that he bickering at her or other things. To the point she wrote me so many paragraphs, saying that her and I been taking our path. She saw me as her sister but now she doesn’t. She ended up blocking me for two months and then unblocked me like a couple weeks ago. I just need other perspective. There are other things forgot to mention but please don’t come to get me for it. I can post the screenshot to understand the situation. It just I needed to know if I was the ass in this story. Thank you for listening and I’m really sorry for my bad grammar.

My ex-girlfriend and I were together for a year and a half, and I was her first everything. Two months ago, she broke up with me for the second time. The first breakup, she regretted it and we got back together the next day. Two weeks later, she broke up with me again. She used the “it’s not you, it’s me” line and told me I was a great boyfriend. She said she just felt like she couldn’t be in a relationship anymore, but she still wanted to be friends.
Looking back, I realize that she sometimes acted cold and distant when we went out, barely speaking to me. This was likely due to her having doubts about our relationship. She even brought up breaking up after minor arguments but never communicated her issues with me. She admitted she had problems with communication. This didn’t happen very often, but it did happen.
After the breakup, she said she wanted to be friends, but her slow responses to my messages confused me. This led me into a downward spiral where I drank heavily and begged her to come back and she rejected. We did see each other once during all this, most likely because she felt bad about how she went about the breakup. During our conversation, she said that she felt she made the right choice and felt relieved, saying she loves me but isn’t in love with me. Despite this, we ended up making out, which left me feeling confused.
Our last and final time we talked, we talked on the phone and it got bad because when she found out that I was drunk she hung up and I kept trying to call her back multiple times.(I know how bad that is and it’s inexcusable) She blocked me on everything saying she was sorry about having to block me and that maybe we could talk once I was sober. Three weeks after that, she unblocked me. I haven’t contacted her since because I’ve accepted that she doesn’t want to be with me anymore. I also sought help for my drinking problem and have been sober ever since. Also I’ve reflected on our relationship and maybe I wasn’t the boyfriend she said I was. Maybe it could’ve been better, who knows.

2-3 months ago me and her broke up but we started in the same gc with our mutual friends and agreed to be friends. I did fuck that up by bringing up the future of us many times all because straight after we broke up i asked her is there a chance in the future and she said maybe.
After i got blocked for doing that i didn't know why she i contacted her many more times the first few being me apologizing which she accepted and all the other times i contacted for comfort of mind she ignored.
She did say after we broke up she did truly love me and i made her the most comfortable out of all her relationships and never treated her toxic. aswell as we both promised not to block each other or hate on each others name etc. which i agreed to.
Obviously that promise got broken and a few weeks ago i was questioning the break up again asking myself if there was another guy and how i felt used and she never really loved me as she looked fine after the break up like nothing happened. i was talking to a mutual friend about it who did let her know what i was thinking she she told him to tell me i'm getting over my head and not to accuse her of cheating which i apologized for again.
But recently it been more complicated Yes she did save me from committing. which i truly thank her for completely. But i talked to multiple people about it and most of them said she doesn't care anymore and doesn't want me in her life. (context because i had questions i wasn't getting answers too after the breakup and after i got blocked. i did try reaching out just to get comfort multiple times to no avail. which i did tell them about.)
It's just so confusing to me that she's staying in the same friend group i showed her too even talking/typing like me still. though it feels like she wants nothing to do with me. in my head i keep saying i'm over her but deep down i know she will always have a spot in my heart as she genuinely treated me very good and we only broke up due to distance, family issues she was going through and her being really busy not being available to help me whenever i did vent to her.
i'm not sure what to really do. Do i unblock her and see where stuff go? or do i keep her blocked and keep ignoring her like she did to me for a month straight.
but what's more confusing is that apparently she doesn't wanna mix online and irl? yes i did meet her online but we did meet irl for a couple times and was doing long distance. It's just confusing to me how after our breakup she says that as during it she consider me irl as i seen her body and everything and met her family.
Aswell as she said after the breakup she isn't looking for any relationships and wasn't looking but she got into one with me which i questioned her about and all she said was sorry. Yet now it seems like she likes one of my friends and she's doing everything she used to do with me when she liked me with him now.

TLDR: ex friend trying to get back into my life after I stopped talking to him and I need advice on what to do
I’ll try not to make this super long. So I 29F had this friend who now I believe is. 30m. He used to be my best friend and we crossed that line in our friendship which shouldn’t have happened. We had a rocky friend relationship because he would only talk to me whenever he wasn’t in a relationship and would only want to hook up with me so I decided I wanted better than that and stop talking to him and blocked him. Fast forward my dad ended up dying close to two years ago and I unblocked him because he knew my dad and helped him out as well with rides. I had flown into town because I was living out of town at the time and decided to try to talk and patch things up with him. Anyways all he wanted to do was hook up with me even though I was like no but did it anyway get it over with. I blocked him on everything the following day because who hooks up with someone day after their parent dying. So fast forward to recently where I unlocked people on social media including him and he tried to follow me but my accounts are private and he messaged me saying how he missed me and wanted to take me out and he apologize but blamed it on being young and dumb which is a load of crap.
So I just don’t know if I should give him the light of day and tell him how I feel or keep ignoring him. Low key I do miss our friendship because we actually did fun things together but I don’t think I can do that to myself again because it just brought up memories I don’t want to relive

Hi! I tried writing it all out, but it was too long so I am going to try to keep bulletpoints and keep a timeline.
Junior year, 15 years old:

• Did not have friends til this point, met this one guy in class though
• first relationship, first kiss, first everything until one month later when he left me for someone else (also cheated on me)
• anxiety latched onto losing him, kept sending messages trying to get him back for two months until it was no contact for 4 months, he knows that i struggled with losing him though heavily
• I notice people he knows keeping tabs on me, I didnt realize until I sent him a message asking to get back together and one of them starts laughing at me + i think one of them took a photo in class but not sure, just suspicion

Senior Year, 16 years old;

• Our classes are close so we see each other again
• he tried to message me before the year started though but went silent afterwards and backed out
• I offered to be friends with benefits, he agreed, the first night he wanted a BJ so I did a little bit but didn't want to do anymore
• he locked in his car until I agreed to date him again
• broke up the next day with him because the anxiety of worrying if he was cheating was too much
• tried to get him back the same night, it was the last time I was emotionally intimate with anyone like that as I confessed how I missed him, how it was hard moving on, etc. and he agreed to get back together
• we hooked up and he ghosted me (hard block and everything)

Still Senior year but here is where the cycle starts

• he unblocks me and tries to get another hookup, i say no, he begs and I give in, it was just a hookup
• He does this again, begs for sex, I say no but give in
• at this point, my anxiety is kicking in hard, i block his accounts and he makes more to get to me anyways, it just becomes a chore to give in
• He calls up my phone at 3 am repeatedly, I say no but he threatens to make a scene, I give in, he is drunk and I am starting on antidepressants so I am nauseas, when I can't give him a BJ, he gets mad and berates me saying that he found "badder bitches" and telling me everything wrong with me
• When I tried to leave, he just said "leave like you always do" and I always wondered if it was his revenge for leaving the first night
• Cycle continues, I get anxiety seeing his name on the phone (like instant nausea and disassociation with my body)
• one time he threatens to knock my door down when i stood my ground and talked about reporting, saying he didn't care, deleted everything when I started taking screenshots, he just came back again the next day
• I keep going back though, mainly because he gave me validation and attention and it felt like he was the only person that saw me (at this point, no relatable friends and no family support system, he was the only person who shared my experiences)

Post Graduation 2023

• I moved to another side of town, all my friends left the state or just went silent, had to leave my job, i went to him for comfort for the first time because he was the only person I knew so i started embracing him
• we still had moments where I didn't want to but he did so I felt like I had to
• I tried dating but each time, I couldn't trust them; i was so afraid that they just wanted my body that I started treating it like that, which ended in only one night stands
• Met this new guy D that was his opposite in november, changed my usernames, we went on for three months until he left me because I had too much intimacy issues (emotional mainly) and didn't let him past my walls, so i tried to go back to the first guy
• first guy moved to cali, admitted to wanting to reach out to me (pretty sure he tried but couldn't find me anymore), we relied on communication and he would be pressing on for photos and video calls, one time he said that it'll be better next time because this time we will both want it this time, not just him
• until we had a conversation on how he really saw me
• I romantized it all as a complicated relationship, to a friendship, and I think that was just to protect myself from the truth because he admitted that he only cared about the sex with me, never beyond that. I asked if he ever felt guilty and he just said that he didnt, we were young and we didn't understand anything
• I ended it and he tried to make another account, I accepted but he didn't say anything. I think its either because there really isnt any use since he is in another state, but also maybe to see if I would take him back still.

I am still processing it. I left it behind in March. I am not sure what to make of it. Calling him an abuser feels so dirty, like I am shitting on everything that happened and every tiny detail that mattered to me. I am just confused. Some times it feels like it fits and he is a bad guy but other times, like now, I feel like I am just overreacting and it really was just us being young, which feels wierd cause half of it was barely a year ago. I don't know . I am just confused and would love insight from others.

If anyone could give me advice on what to say about this situation or just their input me and my best friend would appreciate the thoughts of others. I’ve known my best friend who we’ll call April (18F) for nearly 15 years now. Back in August of 2022 right before our senior year she started talking to one of our close friend’s cousin who we’ll call Diego (16M). They started dating January 2023 and everything seemed to be going fine. However recently on one of her family trips that she brought him on she found out that he was flirting with this girl (20? F)and she would give him money. It isn’t some random chick either it’s his dad’s girlfriend’s daughter so I guess you could say his stepsister. He had apparently been doing this from October of last year up until January of this year. April never found out because Diego kept on deleting the messages he would send her. To make matters worse this was a girl my best friend expressed discomfort in so Diego on his own accord blocked her but when all this went down he admitted that he would block her when April and Diego would meet up then unblock her afterwards. There is kind of a lot of different things that I’m too lazy to get into so I’ll sum up what I think is important: 1) Diego would flirt with his stepsister so she would send him money 2) They meet up a couple times without my best friend knowing 3) Diego would block and unblock the stepsister so April wouldn’t find out 4) when Diego texted stepsister about it with my best friend on screen share she said something along the lines of you didn’t delete it and tell her the truth your not gonna make it seem like it was just me 5) Diego admitted that he liked his stepsister when April and him were together at some point in the relationship but I think he now denies this There is probably more that I just don’t remember but this is basically it off of memory. Also before any of y’all say flirting is not cheating we are not one hundred percent sure he didn’t do anything else when they would meet up so I just still put it as cheating. I don’t know if it matters but Diego is younger then us he is currently a junior in high school. To me the obvious choice would be to leave him but I want to point out that they are both very attached to each other and have a big bond I guess. I mean like if me and her are on FaceTime fifty percent of the time he would be on face time too but on another device. He was always invited to any family activity she had. They went to prom together, a lot of firsts together, so knowing her I dont think she would want to leave him. (She broke up with him already I mean completely cut off) I personally think she should leave him but I guess what I’m telling her isn’t really helping her in that as she is quite literally still texting/seeing him everyday (partly due to their jobs). So I’f y’all could give me advice on what to tell her or straight up give your opinions about it I would appreciate it. Also last thing I will most likely be showing her the comments as she knows I’m posting this and does not know what to do so if any of y’all want to leave something directly at her.

Me and my ex where dating for about 7-8 months and we would argue a lot over little stuff that she didn’t like me doing like taking a shower then going to something to eat or when I go out to grab some food for my self but I also had my downfall she told me I didn’t make her feel like a women and she felt like the man in the relationship because every time we would argue I wouldn’t bring up the situation or I wouldn’t address it and she would always have to address stuff and I used to tell childish jokes to her about other females she said she didn’t like it so I stop but the last straw was when we was together and she found text messages in between my co worker and said she we was not flirting but I guess she was upset that I was texting another girl and didn’t let her know but we went out the dinner and she couldn’t look me in the face and she was so pissed and it was storming so hard so it wasn’t safe for me to drive so she asked did I wanna stay at her place for the night and she would be hot and cold all night she would kiss me and then try to slap my face right after so then the next day she wakes up and she’s pissed at me and she told me my hoodie that she always love to wear, but she kept all the other stuff that I bought her so then that day she was being hot and cold all day again then As I was driving home, she blocked me on everything and then she sent me a long paragraph and then she unblocked me, and after a bunch of talking and stuff, she decided to give me another chance to redeem myself, and then she took the chance back then 2 weeks later she kept so then I stop begging and started no contact it’s been 11 days and she still views my story from time to time

we havnt been "together" for a while (trying to work on the relationship). she lets it be known that she has dating apps and things like that or when she's talking to a girl which i've never really been upset about because ik we're not together.
i was stressed out about my birthday and i wanted to feel better about myself. prove im not a bad person. i flirted with this girl for one night and then i blocked her. me and my fp got into an argument on my birthday and said she'd block me i unblocked the girl again and did the same thing. i blocked her the next day.
a few weeks later she looked through my phone and found the messages. they weren't on the main page so i'm guessing she searched for it. she woke me up and asked what it was and i told her the whole truth. she was made that i didn't tell her but and said that i betrayed her and lied to her. I told her that i was sorry for not telling her but that i thought there was nothing to tell seeing as i had blocked her weeks ago now.
I was at work today and i came home to her telling me she doesn't want to do this anymore. she's blocked me on everything. i feel like i can't live on anymore and i have work tomorrow . i don't know what to do without her, she's been the only person that cares about me and now im just alone with nothing and no one. i've been crying since she hung up like 6hrs ago. i can't do this

Basically, I was introduced to this guy by my closest childhood friend. We've started talking for some time and at the start, everything seemed to go swimmingly well. Conversations flowed smoothly and it was dreamlike. There seemed to be some tension there: Staring into each other eyes, the whole world got quiet, etc. The friendship was initiated by the guy and he started texting me a lot and he would call me for hours on end. After only around a week of knowing me, he started pestering me for my phone number and he was extremely persistent. I ended up giving it to him. He started texting me every single day, morning till night, no matter whether if I replied or not. He would send me updates about his life like his outfit, etc. He decided to introduce me to his close friend and that went...well. In short, it was a call with his friends and the girl, who seemed obsessed with the guy as he kept putting me down and comparing herself to me in terms of closeness to the said guy.
He started asking about me at school, like he would ask my childhood best friend about how I was, if I was okay, how I was and all those sorts of stuff. Allegedly, my childhood best friend, let's call him M, always sounded really enthusiastic when he was talking about me. "His voice softens." He initiated everything, as I was not really interested. He would always beg me to call and I ended up giving in. We started having all these late night conversations about any topic that we were into. During these calls, he would always be a little flirtatious. He would always look at me really intimately, as if I was his world. He would say things like, "I like to see your face, stop hiding your beauty." "Oh my gosh, I love talking to you. You're so enchanting." He would always be flirting about how he would be a great boyfriend and constantly asked what my type of guys was. He even had the audacity to question why I was not into him. He did many other things to seem like he genuinely cared for me. For example, he had several lessons in a day. Yes, he's a rather busy lad. However, he would always make time for me and to reply to me, even if it was a text to inform me that he was busy and not purposely ignoring me. He knew that I had trust issues, so he would even send a picture that he was busy to prove that he wasn't purposely avoiding me. Every single time he and I were online on Whatsapp, he would always text me to ensure me that he wasn't ignoring me. Lastly, he is an extremely religious guy, and he never listened to music because of that. However, ever since he met me, he started to listen to the music that I liked and replied to it in detail. He never liked texting, but he would talk to me on Whatsapp all of the time. This is extremely untypical of him, as he is an unemotional guy. In addition to that, the effort put into that should mean something?
The guy kept trying to meet me in person. Since I have extreme trust issues, I didn't want to do that. He was a guy that I met online, and I had let's just say, unpleasant experiences with guys. This was after six months of knowing me. I told him to leave and that he was creep and a pervert due to my personal defense mechanism. He then left me alone and didn't talk to me for a full day. We then talked about it and I told him that I didn't want to talk about why as it was really personal to me. He said that it was fine and I could just tell him when I felt like it.
We were fine after this for another 7 - 8 months. He just really wanted to know and that he wanted me to be honest with him. I kept yelling at him and starting unnecessary fights due to that. Childish, I know. I regret that now, but that's just what I felt and acted upon at that point of time. After all of that, he left and refused to talk to me forever.
I tried to explain to him but he just pushed me away and said that it was fine. I know, I got a taste of my own medicine. He seemed really hurt about the fact that I called him a creep and a pervert and I kept saying that I cared about him when I wasn't willing to be honest with him about why I said those hurtful words in the first place. I tried everything from calling him, to sending him texts, whether it was messages to check up on him or paragraphs explaining and apologising for treating him like garbage. What was even more inhuman of me was that I deliberately called him a creep and a pervert due to me knowing that it was something that would shake him up as it was something that he was called before by many others.
I was about to leave him and the situation alone when he started picking up my calls. He would pick them up and he would say nothing and just leave the call running. I don't know why he did that, and that confuses me thoroughly. When he unblocked me on Whatsapp, he asked me deliberately for something sexual which I am not going to specify due to privacy reasons. He knew that due to my history with guys, that has left long lasting emotional scares.
I regret everything. I realized that I love him deeply. What should I do? He blocked me everywhere and he won't pick up my phone. I'm thinking about showing up at his house. The whole point is not to get him back, but to explain myself. To truly apologise for hurting him. I want to know how he truly feels. Whether he loved me before, still loves me or if it was a whole joke. I sincerely regret my actions, and I want to make up for them. The what if's are burning freshly into my wounds, and I would really appreciate to know the answers.

I posted this in a different sub I thought I would share here as well
Edit: in the Title it is Taking not talking
Throw away the account.
I (26F) & my Brother (34M) Let's call him Ben have always had somewhat of a rocky relationship because I believe he is entitled & a narcissist. He had issues with Substance abuse & would steal & pawn everything that he would get his hands on.
When I was 22 Ben called me & asked for a favor. He wanted me to help him sign for a car. I have always been a people pleaser & since at the time he seemed to be getting better & more responsible I agreed to be the Co-Signer for the car. His payment ended up being $260 every month. The only catch was I would be the only signer meaning the car would be just under my name. Ben looked at me very excitedly & told me that this would make the payments more manageable. I ended up agreeing thinking that he was turning his life around & because he promised that he would refinance the car under his name in 6 months.
The problems started 3 months into Ben having the car. In the first 2 months, he gave the payments on time but on the 3rd month, the payment bounced from his account. Ben proceeded to tell me that he didn't know why it bounced & showed me a screenshot of money being in the account. His continued to happen for the next 4 months until I Ended up just paying it out of my account. after we hit the 6-month mark I told him I was giving him to figure things out I asked him when he would go refinance the care under his name. Ben Told me he wasn't ready & that he needed more time. I told him that he had promised & I had told him the reason that I needed the car out of my name. He Got upset & the conversation quickly turned into a screaming match before he hung up on me.
Within the 1st year, he Missed 6 car payments after I begged him for the money. He started paying me again but only the monthly car payment there were a couple of times he would give me extra to pay me what he owed. Everything was going smoothly Until He started to miss payments again. He owed me almost $2k when I told him to let me file his taxes he was behind on so that He could get some money back. I told him that it would be going into my account to pay for what he owed me & pay off most of the car. He ended up getting a couple of grand. When the Money was deposited I took what he owed me & gave a big chunk to the car. When I let Him know He was Irrate & upset with what I did because he "Needed the Money" I told him he had agreed to it when We filed but he said that didn't matter. I gave the State Return to him plus an extra Stimulus that he had received. After paying off most of the car. He was still missing payments here & there but it didn't affect me as much because he was paid up for 7 months.
Everything was fine Until Last July the last time he gave me a car payment. Ben would come up with excuses about why he couldn't give me the car payment. I paid the car off & I still haven't gotten anything from him. Ben Told me I was just waiting for a Tax check in the mail that has been supposedly coming but it's been almost 2 months & nothing yet. Everything hit the fan about 2 weeks ago.
Ben called my husband & me to Buy him oil because the car broke down. I told him I couldn't take him & to ask our Younger brother to take him to buy the oil. My younger brother told me that he ended up paying for the oil because Ben had no money. Ben left the car on the side of the road for 5 days. I did not know that the car was on the side of the road 5 blocks from my house because it wouldn't start until I texted him to ask him when the check would be arriving.
When I asked for the Where's My Refund screenshot he got upset & told me He wasn't going to give me all the money because he needed to fix the car. Ben told me I only cared about myself & he hadn't been working. I'm already done with the BS & I wanted everything to be over. I told him that it had been almost a year since he had paid me anything for the car & I wanted the car out of my name or I was taking it back. Ben called my bluff & told me where the Keys were. I decided to Grow a backbone & I went for the car keys that were at our sister's house. I talked to my parents to make sure they had my back. That’s when my mom told Ben was using again. That further solidified my decision. With the help of my in-laws, we towed the car to my house & everything was fine for about 3 days
After 3 days Ben went to my sister's house to get his keys & that’s when he realized that I had kept my word & took the car back. He. Went. Off. On. EVERYONE. He called my sister a Bitch & told her never to speak to him again. He went over to my parent's house to get the key & went off on my dad for being on my side. Ben told my dad to shove the car up his ass. My mom confronted him about using it again & he said some things to my mom as well & stormed off with the Car key. Ben called me yelling at me about how much of a bitch I was & that we never gave a shit about him. He demanded I give him $9k for the car & when I refused he told me He would see me in court. When I asked him for the key back to told me to send my dad for it. I told him I was not involving my dad in our issues & he told me that was too bad because he already did & he blocked me. I called my Younger brother crying asking if he could go pick up the key & I told him everything that was going on. My younger brother was upset & texted Ben telling him he was picking up the key. Ben unblocked me & started texting me Saying I didn’t have to act the way I was acting & that he told me that he was going to give me half of the tax money to pay for some of what he owes me. He told me I was “fucked up” for taking what little he has left & only caring about money. Ben continued to demand $9k for the car & when I told him no & I was Keeping the car he told me “Talk to Dad & he will tell you.” He called my dad yelling & crying about how we never cared about him, How we were taking what he had left, & that he was going to go to NC with the family. Ben told my dad that I never told him how much he owed me When I stated it 4 separate times in the messages. My parents have tried to give me the money he owes me to keep the peace but I refused to take it because it's not their mess to clean up.
I Feel like the asshole because this has started arguments between me & my husband & as well as my parents & me. I hate being a Bitch & mean. It makes me feel sick & it drains me completely. My dad also has health issues, & the stress is making him sick. I’m on the verge of giving in just so I can Save my dad some head & heartache. I love my parents & everything they do for me but I'm just so sick of watching them help Ben out of every situation.
TLDR: My brother owes me money for a car and he is upset that I took the car back.

So guys, after more than years spent with him , ( excuse my english ) , filled with laughter , tears , success and fails , we broke up a lot then we came back , we were so close like people would say guys if you didn’t marry then we don’t know who deserves to . After everything, and i can’t tell u how much he means to me , like a pierce of my fuckin heart , we had a fight few months ago like three , and yesterday i discover that he is in a relationship with the girl he told me to not worry about …. I can’t express how much i wished that this would be a joke , he told me that yesterday literally after i unblocked him , texted me asking why did i unblock him , and then acted like we’re friends, when every time this happened we used to come back as if nothing happened, he came telling me his problems with his new gf , i thought he was kidding, and telling me am sure u wont go tell her we’re talking, and then again i thought he was kidding just to make me jealous or idk , later i discover he wasn’t joking and he’s afraid to lose her, and i felt like shocked ? Sad ? Mad ? I wanna end my life ? Everything ????? I feel like am never gonna trust anybody’s love again, because u guys can’t believe how he was with me , how he used to hug me and kiss me , how he used to be my relief and my safe side in this cruel world , and after seeing this , and he blamed it on me , i still didn’t cry, ig am in shock , i work so much and am so busy during the day yet he didn’t leave my mind any fuckin second , i don’t know how would i let myself express this rage inside me , its like a mountain in my chest but i can’t cru for some reason , i want to so bad but i cant. After i had a believe that he was my safe side in this world , that he would never let me go , never give up on me , on us , on what we had , guys he literally did ! I am writing this with feelings i can’t ever express, it was my birthday today , it’s the worst day ever. I want to move on , love , and live again despite all of this , and i know i will move on , because life never stops over anyone,but i need to heal and live every second of this grief so it ends .

Recently, a couple of weeks ago the woman I’ve been seeing (Emily 22F) kept pressing the issue on knowing more about my commitment issues and why I was not ready to make things official.
For some context in the past I have been cheated on, used as a rebound without my knowledge and used for my money. I will call this previous girlfriend Nikki (24F).
She messed me up for a while, it’s been 4 years since we broke up and it still hurts to think about, so I avoid it entirely. I haven’t been able to be serious about another women since.
I met Emily 11 months ago and at first this was purely sexual however we have a lot in common and get along very well, we have been going on dates, spending almost every day together and falling asleep on the phone with one another. We have spent so much time together she started to think we were dating and I had to let her know that this was still purely a FWB relationship.
I like her but I am not ready to enter the dating stage yet. She got really upset, cried and we didn’t talk for a couple of days. I did everything I could to get her back into my life again so that everything could go back to normal. When we had a chance to talk I let her know that I’ve been hurt before and that now I struggle with commitment issues. I didn’t go too deep but she said she understood and we agreed to take things slow.
The problem comes in when she asked me about Nikki and if she was the reason I had commitment issues. I panicked when I heard my exes name and I was really upset that she would look into my past without my permission. We have mutual friends so I know she had to ask around. I let her know how violated I felt and that not only was that wrong for her to look into but it was borderline stalker behavior. Long story short, after I left her place I blocked her number, and gave her the silent treatment for a couple of days.
When I was ready to talk to her again and unblocked her she’s now blocked me, on all platforms and completely gives me the cold shoulder. It’s been about a week and a half now and she can’t even look at me when we cross paths. I feel nauseated and scared because I don’t want to lose her.
Will this take time before she’s over it or is she never speaking to me again? What can I do to fix this.
TLDR: My best friend/situation-ship looked into my past without my permission, I got upset and distanced myself. She blocked me and won’t talk to me.

Um. I'm just kind of at a loss right now?
I (25F) just got out a relationship with my boyfriend (31M) - but also, kind of not really (explained below). We were together for almost 2 years and lived together for over 1 year. Our relationship went through A LOT in this time. He also has 3 young children whom he has split custody of, which put a lot of strain on us. The dynamics in the home got so toxic that I decided I needed out. (I now have an apartment I will be moving into in July.)
I attempted to have conversations with him to try to mediate and fix the relationship, but it often went nowhere. Finally, I told him that I was looking for a place to live and wanted to move out. He was somewhat upset at first, but then eventually felt it was a good idea and that I should go. It was very back and forth, and finally about 3 weeks ago we got into an argument where he said he wanted to break up. I was fed up, and despite us sleeping in the same bed that same night, I took the day off work and moved all of my stuff out and went to stay with a family member.
We've been back and forth via text and hooking up at this time. He says he still loves me and just wants the best for me, for me to go and be happy, for me to find what I deserve because he doesn't deserve me. A few days after I moved out he already was hooking up with people, though, which he admitted to me. He has been blocking and unblocking my number.
Last night, we winded up texting where he explained that he has been in long-term relationships since he was 20 years old and never had a chance to be on his own. That he has always had to take care of other people and never himself; his kids, his girlfriends. He also explained that he never truly got to process the death of his mother, which had taken a huge toll on him mentally and emotionally. He told me he loved me and that we're going to be together, just not right now. He said being separate had nothing to do with him wanting to hook up with other women, but that he couldn't guarantee he wouldn't be hooking up with other people if it were to happen. He told me to do the same, to go have fun and meet new people and be taken on dates like I deserved.
I winded up going to his place, and we spent the night together. Talking, laughing, cuddling - it felt like old times.
He said he's broken as a person and needs to heal himself, and that he needs to be alone in order to do it. He kept saying that we are going to be together but he can't say when. He apologized for all the hurt he caused and thanked me for everything I did for him.
I'm not naive, and I'm not dumb. I love him deeply, but I told him I'm not sitting around waiting for him. He told me he would never ask that, that if I found love in this time then to go be happy.
My question is, is this truly genuine? Does he actually need space to figure himself out, or is he just trying to let me down gently? I know men tend to do this when they have life issues/problems; push people away, especially their partners.
I know he has been through a lot in his life, as have I, and I can respect that he needs to be on his own. I'm kind of in the same boat, back-to-back relationships since I was 15 and never on my own. I do have my own work to do on myself, a lot of it actually.
It takes two to tango and there were times I was a bad partner too. I can acknowledge that.
TL;DR: My boyfriend and I separated, but he is telling me that he wants me and that we are going to be together in the future? Should I wait, or should I leave?

It is late 2022, my fiancée of 5 years was breaking up with me, and me and my best friend had tickets to see a concert on her birthday. Her boyfriend had bought them with the plan that I would pay him back before the show.
I was having financial hardship at that time and wasn’t able to pay him. This meant I wasn’t allowed to go. frustrating, but understandable since we made an agreement.
At this time I’m having a breakdown because of the breakup with my partner. My whole world feels like it’s collapsing, along with financial problems and issues with my infertility. I’m losing my mind. I’m trying to explain all of this to my best friend, she can’t focus on anything other than the $200 I owe her boyfriend. She tells me in no uncertain terms that she has no sympathy for me.
This is devastating, more-so as the year before this, our friendship was withering away as she grew closer to her partner and distanced herself from her friends.
Then I’m Stupid, I blow up on her and block her. My partner during the same day breaks up with me, and I go into in-patient care because it’s better than my plan of jumping off a bridge. A week later I unblock her and apologize
Four months later, We haven’t spoken much since. I’m trying to rebuild my life. I had lost my fiancée, my home, my best friend, and my job.
I reach out to her to apologize again and say I’d like to meet up and talk about things. She agrees, she explains how hurt she was. I do nothing but apologize. We cry together and resolve to try again.
Since then (early 2023) we hang out and chat over text. I even make it a point to go see her every Sunday at her job to say hello and catch up. Our friendship appears to be improving and stable.
A month ago, I’m realizing that I have feelings for her friend. She’s recently out of a LTR with this guy who cheated on her multiple times. I’ve had a thing for her for years and I think, well, let’s see where this goes. I talk many times with my friend about it, she says she doesn’t know where her friend is at, but I can certainly try. I chat with her best friend a bit, we agree to meet up just to catch up. It’s not a date.
The day arrives and She sits down and begins to lay into me for blocking her friend in 2022 and tells me how bad of a friend I am for about 20 minutes and then leaves. I’m stunned and feel like an asshole. I message my best friend again apologizing for everything that happened before and tell her that I’ll do better. I’m left on read.
We haven’t spoken. Then I learn more yesterday from a friend who’s been texting her. Basically, she’s never trusted me since the falling out. She and her friend were weirded out about my crush, but instead of telling me it, there is basically this plan to humiliate me.
I don’t understand what we’ve been doing. I thought we were rebuilding our friendship all this time. It feels like she did all of this out of revenge.
What more could I have done to repair our friendship? Should I still try to be her friend? Did I deserve this?

You HOPEFULLY won’t see this one. But if you do know I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about this.
I have no idea what you’re doing in life other than what you went to school for. I hope it suits you the way you dreamed of. I hope you’re happy, content and prospering. I went fishing by your house where the lakes are, and all I could think about is the one time you showed it to me. I never wanted to be so distant, I think it was a mix of complacency, fatigue from my brain trying to think of a way out of the same circle everyday (if you would like to know I went on my first solo bicycle ride the other day with self motivation the first of its kind and hopefully not the last) But I think with me trying to better myself I shut you out. And I did so without thinking about it and I really can’t forgive myself looking back but I do thank you for doing everything you could to try and save us. I was trying in my own way. I noticed I lacked a lot of communication skills, we didn’t talk to eachother that often because my work schedule and your daily life schedule become so separate. I was too consumed by my video games. And I’m trying minimise screen time atleast for games so I can still be a human. It’s gonna hurt to say this but this is it. This is what I have to say. I am sorry, I think I loved you, I know I wanted to love you. I feel I did love you. And I still have feelings for you but do not want anything reciprocated unless it’s what you want.(I pray you don’t see this) I’ve been 100% honest about how our trust issues started and what I did when anybody asks. Because at the end it was mutual and cordial, but I know I was the reason for it all coming to a stop. I really did see the rest of my life with you, Regardless of how we stood relationship wise. Because one thing I did and still do think is that out of the millions of people, you’re a very VERY rare person and that made you special. I never really expressed it because I’m absolutely terrible at expressing feelings (think I might be becoming a sociopath and it makes me wanna cry) I hope you don’t think about the negatives and look at the positives. Can’t listen to paramore without hearing you scream singing it in my passenger seat. Still get chills to this day because you can sing. But anyway I’m yapping now. I do still have feelings for you. Would it stop me from moving on, no, but I’ll wait until whoever comes to me. Last but CERTAINLY not least…..
still think about you to this day hoping you’ll unblock me and let me say goodbye. To have that closure would mean everything to me.
To any readers thank you for hearing me open my temporary heart.

It's been 2 months since the break up and about 12 days of no contact from me. Yeah everyone says NC and that's what I should have done, I've basically just prolonged my healing. Even though I'm the one in constant contact I did get a lot of things done. I've been seeing a therapist and I've been on anti depressants. I got a promotion and I've been seeing family more. I have him blocked but I still check snapchat because it's easy to block and unblock 😕. I know I sound crazy and I should have just did the no contact it's just been hard after 3 years. I guess I wasn't ready to accept it even though we ended it for real that one day. I couldn't grasp how someone I loved for 3 years could just end it once and for all. I'm trying to do the no contact for good this time and see if time changes things. I feel like I messed up as most people think NC will bring them back. Maybe it does maybe it doesn't but my healing is what's important now. I accept the fact I didn't go about this at all the right way but is their even a right way to get over a break up. The more you put in the more you feel you're owed or at least thats how I felt. I felt if I didn't at least keep trying keep begging he'd forget about me. I realize now yeah he was messaging me back but I was the one reaching out. I'm done reaching now and it's not like I have his friends anywhere on social media or talk to them. I thought they were my friends too I feel like I messed things up with them too. They never once texted me though or asked how I was and after about a month I got tired of it. Maybe it's not too late to get this whole NC right, maybe I'm still holding out for hope though. Silently hoping this NC will finally either make him realize he does miss me. Or maybe it'll make him realize we were never good for each other and thank God she stopped contacting me. Either way my therapist wants me to be kind to myself like I would be kind to a friend. So here's hoping I can actually do everything I'm setting out to do from now on!

some backstory: (sorry it’s so long)
me and my ex bf were together for 4 year. ofc we had our fights but a lot of our fights were due to our (especially my) mental state. we would break up and be talking again within 3-4 days. we loved each other. i woke up to “good morning”’s and “i love you”’s every single day..even the times when we were on “breaks” we were crazy for each other. i was there for him and he was there for me. he always joked that if we did ever break up and if he ever got with someone else they would never be bettereplace me and how i’ll always be on his mind. we had plans for the future and everything. we were each others firsts for alotta things and we loved that about eachother
these past 5 months have been the worse months of my life, due to personal/mental health problems (i have borderline personality disorder and bipolar) as well family problems and deaths i’ve become distant to him. i loved him a lot, but i would find myself going through randomly periods of hating him, being very rude and never wanting to speak to him again and even times ghosting him for days. but i never once left him and when those episodes were over i apologised and we would just start over again like nothing happened. he loved me for ME
a few months ago we were calling and i wanted to watch tiktoks with him, so he screen shafted and we watched them. i asked to see his dms and he was hesitant at first but showed me. i seen him sending flirty messages/tiktoks to a girl let’s call her C. he would send her the same tiktoks he would send me. i got mad and left the call he apologised and said he was sorry for “being overly nice” and wasn’t attracted to her at all and she was merely a friend. i was hesitant but forgave him and he said he stopped messaging her and i believed him. but i would always bring up that night to him to simply mess with him lol and he would always reassure me
now. present. this month i’ve been under a lot of stress and went through that random episode of ghosting him again (i hate myself every time i do it and idk why i do) i realised yes i loved him but i didn’t want a relationship with him for now.so i broke up with him, i told him the plans for us in the future will happen and how ill always love him and he responded with a big paragraph saying he doesn’t want to be with anyone else and essentially i’m the only girl he wants in his life. and ofc us being us we were back talking about a few days later lol he sent me a flirty insta video may 21st and i replied “im not C silly” and replied saying ofc not and reassured me again even though we were broken up
we’ve been broken up now for say 2 weeks now and weren’t rlly in high contact with each and i just found out 3 days ago he’s with C not by him telling me but by him having a shared playlist with her called “<3” and leaving the one we shared, i messaged him and he was being dry. he then told me yes he was with him and she’s his gf now and “wished me all the best” and said he would have to unfollow me on everything. and he did. i’m unfollowed on everything and he even unfollowed the artists we loved and shared together (music was very important in our relationship). i’m so hurt and heartbroken by all this. yes I broke up with him but like many other times we were ofc going to get back together. i’m so numb idk if i want to cry or laugh at how ridiculous this all is. i can’t believe im experiencing one of those “he got with the girl he told me not to worry about” scenarios. he’s gone completely cold shoulder. i seen he still followed me on Pinterest and when i was going through our chat i accidentally sent a “❤️” i screamed, blocked him and threw my phone then 5 mins later i unblocked him and saw he seen the ❤️ but didn’t say anything. i’m so lost. i at least want to talk to him one last time and explain and tell him everything..i rlly can’t believe he rlly just up and left me after everything we have been through
the pain and heaviness in my chest is too much to handle and he’s constantly in my mind but ofc he is!! ive been talking to him almost every day for the past 4 years! i miss him and love him so much i cant bare this! i’ve never been truly broken up with before so this is so hard.. pls someone help i need advice on what to do

Hello everyone.
Last month I posted in the bridezillas sub, complaining about the bride, my best friend, because I felt she was being very nasty unfair and unreasonable. After month after a huge falling out, I realized that I was the one being nasty, unfair, and unreasonable, and I want to make it up to her somehow.
For context (as I deleted the last post): There were a lot of changes with her wedding planning; at first it had been August of this year with a full ceremony and reception, then they decided to elope, then they moved it up to April. They also asked me to officiate instead of the other officiant they had had. I was doing a lot for her and her wedding, but not what she needed from me. I didn’t live up to any of the made of honor expectations. I dropped the ball on planning a bachelorette, (I tried, but it was too last-minute and not much of a party at all), I didn’t attend the bridal shower because I was sick. But I had felt that with constantly talking to her about everything regarding the ceremony and helping her make decisions, I was doing what I needed. Because of my own insecurity, I was constantly worried about doing, but I was not putting any energy into what she wanted from me, only what I thought she needed.
For the night before the reception, we were all supposed to stay with her sister-in-law, and I asked her sister-in-law if my fiancé could stay with us, and she said yes, she had already said it was fine if partners stayed, just as long as we asked first. Then the bride texted me later, saying that her brother was upset and did not want my fiancé to stay there, but that she didn’t want to be involved. I asked her to please get them to contact me so I can figure it out because I did feel like it was my place to ask her sister-in-law about an argument she had with her husband that she didn’t even directly tell me about. The bride refused saying she has enough to worry about and that this is not her priority. That flipped a switch in me and I said “ive bent over backwards for you for this and you can’t even ask her to text me?” This resulted in a huge fight. She eventually told me that she felt like I had done absolutely none of my made of honor duties, and that she was really upset and disappointed, so the fact that I had said, I’ve bent over backwards for her really hurt her and struck a nerve. At the time I was very ery shocked and hurt because I had really felt like I did so much for her and it felt like she was completely ungrateful for it. We had a falling out at this point. She told me she did not want me at the reception, so I didn’t go and we haven’t spoken since then.
A couple days ago, I reread the text she had sent me about how I had not carried out any of my made of honor duties and how hurt she was. I was trying to reread it to get closure, I guess to reassure myself that she hurt me and I don’t want her as a friend anymore. But when I reread it, I felt completely differently about everything. She was right, I didn’t carry anything out, and she had swallowed her feelings to save mine, and then when she came out with those feelings, I felt betrayed, but I had really betrayed her. I’m so upset and angry with myself that I just realized this now and I’ve probably thrown away our friendship because I couldn’t see past my own feelings to see her perspective. I sent her an apology on Tuesday, but I wasn’t sure if it sent correctly because I had had her number blocked when I sent it and only unblocked her after, and it had sent as a text message instead of iMessage, so I wasn’t sure if you because I couldn’t see past my own feelings to see her perspective. I sent her an apology on Tuesday, but I wasn’t sure if it sent correctly because I had had her number blocked when I sent it and only unblocked her after, and it had sent as a text message instead of iMessage, so I wasn’t sure if she received it. Today I sent her another message saying that of course she does not owe me a response, but I just wanted to make sure that she received my apology because she deserved to have it. That one sent as an iMessage and she read it immediately. I didn’t want to bother her or force her to respond, but I wanted to make it clear that I really want the chance to be her friend again and to be a better friend, and even though I know I can’t make it up to her, I want to do as much as I can to try. I’m getting married next May and if I could give up my bachelorette party and bridal shower for her I would. It hurts to not be her friend, but it hurts to know that she didn’t get any of what she wanted and she didn’t even want to tell me until I was an asshole about it.
I just want to make it up to her somehow if I do even get the chance to be her friend again. I have no idea how I’d even start doing that but I want to do anything and if anybody knows or has any clue as to what would be the best course of action I would really appreciate it. I’m open to any thoughts, opinions and responses, I just want to know how to could possibly start to make this up to her.
Thank you.

Hey friends of Forhonor Reddit. I deeply apologize if this is the wrong place to post this but, I just wanted to show my idea. I don’t know if anyone has said this before but this is my idea for a possibly new hero.
“The Harvester”
They would be a legit farmer using a scythe as their main weapon (maybe have the ability to completely switch weapons to a pitchfork) . Their “fashion” would be that of a peasant or related clothing such as a fisherman. This may not seem all that “cool” fashion wise nor does it seem to fit all the Brutes and elegant knights of this world..but, it somehow feels like they would fit too. (I mean we legit have an Aztec warrior and a pirate, so not too far fetched)
The lore behind the Harvester will as so, The Wars between factions have gone on for several years, reaping the hard work of the civilians that exist within the world. (I’m assuming so) burning down houses, taking resources of those who have worked years for it, being forced to live a life of fear, and finally a few unlikely heros has risen. A few meek peasant farmers pick up their tools and now use them as weapons. They want to unite the civilians and peasants who can not defend themselves, and establish a safe haven for those who are oppressed by all factions. Even taking those who have retired their weapons from war. They believe they are the last line of defense before this continent succumbed to eternal war. (Yes this directly defies everything Apolloyon worked hard for)
Their moveset: They would move erratically and rather inexperienced with the scythe. Because they were never properly trained in their weapon, like other heroes who have years of experience with their weapons. Yet- they have quite fast lights but their heavies vary in speed, they can delay it or let it fly faster. Each charged heavy causes massive bleed. The charged heavies are not unblockable but have a second or two of uninterrupted stance when the heavy becomes charged. They don’t have side dodge attacks but they have a massive superior block that covers there entire dodge, leading to a parry in the direction of such attack, opening them to an attack that can be used during any chain (square and back left with the left stick) they would then do an uppercut type motion and impale the victim before flipping them over and landing behind the farmer. Causing bleed once again. They have an unblockable attack they can do by pressing square after a forward dodge. It makes the user swing 360 and causes bleed, if parried, if causes the user to fall back and stagger.
Feats and Emotes will come to a second post. What do you guys think about this?

After over 5 years saving money my wife(36F) and I(37M) bought an apartment in Spain for us to move in the near future, we were super happy and planning how we would renew few things for long time, and 5 months later...
Last year my wife suggested opening the marriage for the duration of February, the month that I went to a surgery in my home country, I first rejected as it's not my thing and after she said that was what she wanted I ended up accepting (maybe for fear of loosing her), and I put some rules on place.
1 can't be someone around us 2 can be at our house 3 can't repeat 4 we would never talk about what happened.
First week off the month I did had a chance of having Sex with someone else and I just didn't want to, I didn't feel like doing that, not to mention that I was finding out a lot of health issues like, kidneys showing signals of failure, lumbar disk damage for life, checking for a problem on my knee and doing all the medical preparation for the surgery, and that same week she had friends that came over so she didn't do anything...
On second week about 2 days before my surgery she told me that her friend from work had friends over his house and she offered our house for him to stay. (I didn't like that, but didn't say anything to not sound jealous). I first heard about this friend December whe she went to his house, they invited me but I was meeting a friend and didn't go, their friendship went up very fast, January they already were like BFF.
On my surgery day 10 of February this guy comes to my house, after my surgery we messaged each other and she mentioned he was in my house with her and said me to not worry about and I said her I wasn't worried saying "I trust you blindly" not to mention I was with the anesthesia getting out of the body, full of morphine and pain killers going through a lot of pain, so, that wasn't something I was worried about.
11 of February, I go to my parents house and after a day where everything went wrong I broke down and started to message her telling that I don't want to keep the agreement, that is not something I want, that I'm happy with her and I don't want to be with anyone else and she got kinda of angry about all that conversation telling me that she does not see her having Sex with only one person for the rest of her life and now that I don't let her anything she can't do what she wants and when I come back home we talk about that, and I explained her that I accept that because I was afraid of losing her, to be complacent and things like that.
During this conversation I'm asking her for stop the agreement they kissed each other.
After the kiss she got a bit shocked and went to our room alone.
Next day I woke up and because I was afraid/confused, I apologize her about last night conversation and told her we could keep the marriage opened as she wanted, but I added a new rule, that was I wanted to know everything she did, she gets in to angry like texting saying she's confused about me blocking the agreement, unblocking it again, but adding more rules... She sent me voice note saying that's not a big deal as was for the month, I told her that was my right and she had the obligation of telling me, she said that makes no sense because we both know that I wouldn't handle that well, and I said that was my right , if I could not handle we break up or whatever, she ends this afternoon conversation saying she does not want to talk about that.
On that same night she went to a party with friends and coworkers, she came back home and we are chatting by message for quite a while and I asked her if someone had come to our house to sleep (she's traumatized about be on her own overnight, so I was worried) and she told me her friend came home, we kept some more conversation and gave good night to each other, and they start to have Sex in the sofa and end in the guest room.
Somewhere in middle of February we had a conversation by phone were we spoke about the opening of the marriage and I told her I didn't want to and I wasn't comfortable with all of that, she asked me if I had done something and I told her I had the chance but didn't do anything, she said she didn't do anything, this conversation goes anywhere...
Somewhere around the end of February we had a phone call where she brings up this subject again and we had an argument about she saying that telling me about the adventures was an absurd and after few justification from my side I get angry and tell her to do whatever she wants and don't tell me anything because I didn't care anymore and when I get back home we talk about the future of our relationship.
Few days later on 23 February she went to a company dinner and they all end up in the pub, she came back home alone because the friends stayed on the street close to my home, she sent me a text message saying she got home we chatted for about 40 minutes and gave good night that was about 4:30am, after that she rang this guy and ask him to come to our house, they stayed in the sofa talking and touching each other until fall asleep, few hours later they wake up and went to the guest room for have sex again, after that she text me as usual around 12:30 afternoon.
After that I came back to our home and our relationship was desgracefull for about 1 month, she didn't want to have sex with me at all, when we can handle this situation anymore I open the conversation about divorce and after I stated to cry a lot and she suggests us to give another chance.
After that our relationship went up very fast and stayed in a level that we never experienced before.
Few months later she brings me to meet friends and introduce me to this friend who she had sex with, it's a very friendly and way handsome than me, he's almost 10 years younger than me, we spoke quite a lot only 2 of us.
After that my wife and I went out 2 more times where this guy was present.
Middle August she went to his house once for bbq with all friends from work in a day that I was working, at this time this guy is starting a relationship with another woman from work.
End of September after I had my an emergency surgery of gallbladder removal and was recovering she invited me to go with her to his house for a BBQ, this guy gave me a hand shake so long looking deeply in to my eyes that I felt very uncomfortable with, so much that I never forgot.
Their friendship started to get complicated as they have a lot of values differences, and she is the manager and had to report him, they ended up meeting in a pub for "break up" their friendship.
End of November we decide go for a baby. (No doubt it's mine, we had fertile tests and pregnancy test for the whole month while doing a lot of sex while she was fertile)
End of December this guy leave the company and we get to know she's pregnant.
6 weeks ago I involuntarily made few connections in my head and confronted her about what happened between them in February and she confess to me everything.
Now I'm struggling a lot to deal with all this.
She showed me her texts with him, January they had some conversation where he was calling her milf (she's about 7 years older than him) where she just laughed, they didn't need talk over messages they worked together and whe things was happening he was in my house. She deleted all Instagram messages from February and back, only thing left was irelevant conversation.
she asked for open the marriage, against my heart I accepted and not satisfied with that she broke all the rules except the "no disclosure one" (the only one that was convenient to her).
In the same day I basically begged to stop all this story was the day she did something while telling me she wasn't going to do anything.
Next day she reaffirmed that she wasn't going to do anything and she had sex few hours later.
She introduced me to him, she brought me to his house.
She was going to keep this hidden from me forever.
She is in a tremendous pain seeing my suffering.
She told me she experienced that in a different way as didn't remember the rules, so she accepts the blame but didn't see that she cheated on me, she recognized that after few weeks of we arguing about.
I love her a lot
After all this we improved our communication skills a lot..
She's way more lovely to me now
We are having loads of sex now and better than never with her starting things sometimes.
We are 3 months away from having our first baby.
My life for the past 5 weeks is cry, have nightmares every night, feeling insecure about so many different things, have anxiety attacks quite often, I can't sleep without medication, sometimes I feel better and we do can do things.
I'm struggling a lot to get over all this story staying with her and afraid of if I leaving her and I regret as I feel she's the love of my life.
I'm struggling to accept her version of the story where she says that the guy was only in the right place in the right time, she says that was only those 2 days and they never spoke about that anymore.
As she's only 3 months from giving birth if we break up or give a time she will need to move to her country to have some family support, what will makes me lose the child birth and I'll be away from the baby basically forever being an absent father.
I'm trying really hard to forgive her, we had couple therapy last Saturday and the therapist said that she wants to treat me first.

I USED MY NEWER ACCOUNT FOR THIS POST ON ACCIDENT BUT I HAVE ANOTHER OLDER ACCOUNT I USED LAST MONTH.
Hello everyone.
Last month I posted in the sub, Reddit complaining about the bride because I felt she was being very nasty unfair and unreasonable. After month after a huge falling out, I realized that I was the one being nasty, unfair, and unreasonable, and I want to make it up to her somehow.
For context (as I deleted the last post): There were a lot of changes with her wedding planning; at first it had been August of this year with a full ceremony and reception, then they decided to elope, then they moved it up to April. They also asked me to officiate instead of the other officiant they had had. I was doing a lot for her and her wedding, but not what she needed from me. I didn’t live up to any of the made of honor expectations. I dropped the ball on planning a bachelorette, (I tried, but it was too last-minute and not much of a party at all), I didn’t attend the bridal shower because I was sick. But I had felt that with constantly talking to her about everything regarding the ceremony and helping her make decisions, I was doing what I needed. Because of my own insecurity, I was constantly worried about doing, but I was not putting any energy into what she wanted from me, only what I thought she needed.
For the night before the reception, we were all supposed to stay with her sister-in-law, and I asked her sister-in-law if my fiancé could stay with us, and she said yes, she had already said it was fine if partners stayed, just as long as we asked first. Then the bride texted me later, saying that her brother was upset and did not want my fiancé to stay there, but that she didn’t want to be involved. I asked her to please get them to contact me so I can figure it out because I did feel like it was my place to ask her sister-in-law about an argument she had with her husband that she didn’t even directly tell me about. The bride refused saying she has enough to worry about and that this is not her priority. That flipped a switch in me and I said “ive bent over backwards for you for this and you can’t even ask her to text me?” This resulted in a huge fight. She eventually told me that she felt like I had done absolutely none of my made of honor duties, and that she was really upset and disappointed, so the fact that I had said, I’ve bent over backwards for her really hurt her and struck a nerve. At the time I was very ery shocked and hurt because I had really felt like I did so much for her and it felt like she was completely ungrateful for it. We had a falling out at this point. She told me she did not want me at the reception, so I didn’t go and we haven’t spoken since then.
A couple days ago, I reread the text she had sent me about how I had not carried out any of my made of honor duties and how hurt she was. I was trying to reread it to get closure, I guess to reassure myself that she hurt me and I don’t want her as a friend anymore. But when I reread it, I felt completely differently about everything. She was right, I didn’t carry anything out, and she had swallowed her feelings to save mine, and then when she came out with those feelings, I felt betrayed, but I had really betrayed her. I’m so upset and angry with myself that I just realized this now and I’ve probably thrown away our friendship because I couldn’t see past my own feelings to see her perspective. I sent her an apology on Tuesday, but I wasn’t sure if it sent correctly because I had had her number blocked when I sent it and only unblocked her after, and it had sent as a text message instead of iMessage, so I wasn’t sure if you because I couldn’t see past my own feelings to see her perspective. I sent her an apology on Tuesday, but I wasn’t sure if it sent correctly because I had had her number blocked when I sent it and only unblocked her after, and it had sent as a text message instead of iMessage, so I wasn’t sure if she received it. Today I sent her another message saying that of course she does not owe me a response, but I just wanted to make sure that she received my apology because she deserved to have it. That one sent as an iMessage and she read it immediately. I didn’t want to bother her or force her to respond, but I wanted to make it clear that I really want the chance to be her friend again and to be a better friend, and even though I know I can’t make it up to her, I want to do as much as I can to try. I’m getting married next May and if I could give up my bachelorette party and bridal shower for her I would. It hurts to not be her friend, but it hurts to know that she didn’t get any of what she wanted and she didn’t even want to tell me until I was an asshole about it.
I just want to make it up to her somehow if I do even get the chance to be her friend again. I have no idea how I’d even start doing that but I want to do anything and if anybody knows or has any clue as to what would be the best course of action I would really appreciate it. I’m open to any thoughts, opinions and responses, I just want to know how to could possibly start to make this up to her.
Thank you.