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I think it’s obvious that, while I’ve never lied to my dad and my brother about something big before, I haven’t told either of them about the animals at the zoo and I’m not planning on it. Even if they believed me, that would actually be worse than thinking I was being foolish by working here. If my dad knew what kind of animals the zoo had, he’d freak out, whether or not there were invisible walls to protect me. In and of itself, my father would demand I quit on the spot if he found out about my hourly rate because it was obvious that there was something about this job that warranted it.
So, I opened a savings account at the bank, and when I deposited the check, I put half in that account. That lowered the chances of my dad finding out how much money I was pulling in.
It wasn’t as if I had anything huge to spend the money on anyway, though. Dad had been thrilled with $25/hr. when I got the job, and we’d already started spending some of that first paycheck on new clothes and little house repairs and such. Money has always been tight, and we live in a three-bedroom house, with my dad graciously having taken the smallest room (which was kind of a catchall storage room up until then) once my brother and I wanted separate rooms when we hit our teenage years.
My mom isn’t in the picture, if you’re curious. She worked as a wildlife photographer, and was so good at it that she’d get paid to go off to remote places in Africa. For months at a time. As if we don’t have animals in America, right? But even when she was here, it always felt like she was distracted, wanting to go back to work. Like she cared more about the animals than about us. Say what you want about me, but I like animals more than people, I don’t love them more. I don’t even think of her as mom anymore; in my brain, she’s Patricia.
When I was nine and my brother Stanley was two, she basically left and never came back. Doesn’t even send postcards. For all I know, she’s dead, and the most meaningful thing I ever got from her was my passion for caring about other animals. I got into it early because of Patricia, and then practically every birthday or Christmas present was some book or movie or toy about wildlife. But that’s all she did for us besides financial support. My dad is a real rock in my life, and I count myself lucky I got at least one good parent.
When Patricia ditched us, I started to help out financially when I was younger by working odd jobs, and then real jobs when I hit sixteen. Stanley is sixteen now, and he’s been working at Hanks Hardware for a few months, which meant now it was all three of us pulling in money. But Stanley only makes $10/hr., working four hours after school and then eight hours on Saturday, so my $25/hr. literally doubled our household income. When I’d gotten the job, I told Dad and Stanley that I wanted Stanley to quit his job, and that I’d give him an allowance, $80 a week, which was what he'd be using for pocket money if he’d still been working.
Getting that time back would be huge for Stanley, because it would let him spend more time on his schoolwork. Not just to bring up his grades; he would literally be learning more. And he’s a junior now, doing things like taking a computer class to learn Microsoft Office. Living in a small town limits your options, and knowledge broadens them. I know that much for sure.
Not to mention, he could actually be a teenager, do the stuff kids did. Go see a movie, hang out with his friends at the bleachers and smoke pot, and head out to the lake to swim when the weather warmed up and have a genuinely fun summer instead of having a forty hour work week. And most important, playing video games. I know that sounds strange, but Stanley loves video games and plays online on the TV in the living room. But he hardly ever has time to play, which means sometimes he’ll stay up too late enjoying himself and fall asleep the next day during his first period class. Dad and I never have the heart to tell him to go to bed, though.
My father was uneasy about Stanley quitting, mostly because of the hypothetical of my job falling through. And Dad didn’t even know about the possibility of there being some terrifying incident with an animal, which might cause me such anxiety that I wouldn’t be able to push past it and would end up needing to quit. I really didn’t think that was likely after I’d managed to mostly get over my paralyzing fear of Yui, but I yielded to his logic and we negotiated. Stanley decided to switch to three hours three days a week and four hours on Saturdays.
Little did they know that not only was I was saving up for my own impending student loan payments, but my savings account would cover a most or maybe all of the cost of any college or trade school Stanley wanted to attend when he graduated. I was so happy about that, I don’t have the words. Half of my income is $25/hr. and for eight hours a day will be $52k a year, all of it put in my savings account. Before taxes, but still, that is fantastic money. I’ll have to come clean eventually, when Stanley started filling out FAFSA forms next year, and I’ll probably tell my dad that I was pretty sure they’re running drugs out of the back of the zoo or something. He’ll be so pissed, but that’s over a year away and I’ll burn that bridge when I came to it.
So, in general, I’ve been enjoying working at the zoo and depositing those paychecks. Call me a cynic, but inevitably, that meant something had to go wrong.
After settling in for my shift a few minutes before 9 p.m., Andrew bid me farewell and headed home. He’d just done one last walk of the zoo, so I took out a book and resumed where I’d left off, planning to do a sweep in an hour. I do have some enrichment planned for one of the animals, but I’d had to order something online and it won’t arrive for a few days.
Shortly after my second ramble around on my route to check every enclosure at the zoo, however, I got a text from my brother.

Gary and Shaun are going to the zoo. They want to try to see the animals.

I closed my eyes in annoyance. Gary and Shaun were two sort-of friends of Stanley’s, the middling kind of friend that you sit with at lunch and hang out with at parties but you’ve never actually been to their home. I knew Stanley had been bragging to his friends about my new job. Well, I guessed. He’d told me and Dad at the dinner table that his friends were impressed with my job, and I figured the fact that his sister had a college degree and had started work at $25/hr. was bragging material, especially when it meant Stanley could work fewer hours.
The idea that some of his friends would want to come check out the zoo hadn’t occurred to me, because I’d come at it logically: The zoo was closed to outsiders. Appointment only. And none of them would ever get an appointment, because they were human. But if anything, the rules that restricted them had probably made it a more enticing idea. Also, Stanley said it the zoo on Google Maps at this point, but that it was blurred out. Andrew told me that had been by request (anyone can do it actually), but I’m sure that made the temptation even worse.
Obviously I wasn’t going to let them in, but I didn’t want them to cause trouble, and they were teenagers. Teenagers tend to cause trouble as a general rule. The last thing I wanted was to have to tell Andrew that they’d shown up at the gate intent on visiting the zoo because my brother had talked it up so much. Not that Stanley knew what this place really housed, but still, Andrew had been so stern on no photography of Leila that I would’ve been embarrassed if I had to call the cops because of something like this.
My reply was curt.

Tell those dipshits the place is closed to walk-ins. I’m not letting them in.
I did. They want to go anyway.

I facepalmed and sighed before replying.

If you can’t talk them out of it, just don’t go with them. I’ll deal with it.

There was a long silence, then some ellipses as he typed, then another long silence. I got antsy and sent a follow-up.

Stanley, I mean it. I do not want you here if I have to call the cops to get them to leave. Stay home. If you show up here with them, I’m cutting off the money I give you.

I wasn’t the type to play fast and loose with threats about money, so that probably surprised him. There was the briefest of pauses.

Geez, no need to be a bitch about it. Fine. I’ll stay here. Good luck dealing with those assholes without me.

That was indeed exactly what I wanted, and he must have known that. Hell, I had pepper spray and a taser, so it’s not like I couldn’t keep them out if I really wanted to. But when it came down to it, I figured, what were they going to do? I wasn’t going to open the door or the front gate. The fence was ten feet high, the kind with spaced bars that had decorative spikes at the top, and it was brand new. It wasn’t as if they were going to take bolt-cutters to a barbed wire fence like in a movie.
In the end, I sat back in my chair and just fell back on my regular routine. I wonder now, if I’d called Andrew and told him, maybe asked him to come hang out for a while, whether things would’ve turned out different. But I wasn’t very well going to wake him up for something that essentially sounded like a minor irritation.
At 10:41 p.m., a beep, beep, beep, alert sounded, and I know the exact time because I picked my phone up off the desk out of habit, assuming it was what was making the noise. But it wasn’t. Looking up to the screen of cameras, one was outlined in red, pulling my focus to it. It was an exterior camera with a wide view that panned back and forth, but was now stopped on movement that it had detected and had deemed sufficient to audibly alert me. I later learned that it was in conjunction with a motion detector on the fence. On the screen, I saw two boys, one on the outside of the fence to the left of the entrance gate and one on the inside.
“What the fuck?” I breathed, standing up and putting my book aside. My fingers went to the mouse and keyboard, and I expanded the view from the camera and zoomed in. It seemed I’d underestimated the boredom and curiosity of two small-town teenage boys.
I saw how the first boy had gotten in when the second boy used the same technique, which was to climb a rope that had knots tied in it about a foot apart, a rope that had been hooked onto one of the spikes at the top, presumably with a loop that had been lassoed and tightened. He made it to the top, shifted and dropped to hang from the top by his hands, then let himself fall to the ground, his knees bending and absorbing the shock of the impact before falling on his butt.
One of the boys had hit a growth spurt, topping out at 5’11” now, all gangly limbs. He had short brown hair and I could see him wearing a sweatshirt with the logo of his school on it. That’s the best outfit to wear when breaking in, apparently: something that shows what high school you go to. The other one was a little more built and half a foot shorter, with long blonde hair that he probably thought made him look like Chris Hemsworth. It didn’t.
“I cannot believe this,” I growled, my anger flaring. Heading quickly out of the office, slamming the door behind me, I was out the door and walking toward the entrance, driven by my anger.
Already walking into the park at a speed driven by their interest in the forbidden areas, they started on the path that went toward enclosure one and rounded the zoo. “Hey!” I barked.
“Ripley!” Gary exclaimed. “Your brother said you wouldn’t open the gate, so we let ourselves in.”
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I asked, keeping pace beside them, rage bubbling up inside me. They slowed but didn’t stop. “Do you think this is a joke? There’s a reason I told my brother not to come with you. That alarm you set off goes to the owner of the park, and they’ll definitely be pressing charges. You really want ‘breaking and entering’ on your rap sheet?”
They gave me long-suffering looks, the kind only someone under twenty is capable of. The kind that imply you’re neurotic, or pushy, or self-centered. The kind that say you don’t know what you’re talking about, that they know so much more than you, and that all you are is an annoyance.
“Come on. What is with this place? It sounds awesome, some private zoo, but Stanley didn’t know anything about it,” Shaun told me. Glancing at my belt, where my pepper spray and taser were, he asked, “Is it that top secret? Everything here could sell on the black market for a million bucks or something?”
“They’re expensive animals if poachers get their hands on them, yes,” I said tightly.
“Why would they hire someone fresh out of college for that?” Gary asked, his eyes continuing to take in his surroundings, the path and everything in sight bathed in their standard eerie red glow. “And what’s with the lights?”
“It’s for night vision,” I told him, skipping over the part implying I wasn’t qualified for this job. “Hey, stop.” Moving in front of them, I forced the issue, moving to stand in front of them and forcing them to either stumble to a stop or run into me. “If you climb back over the fence and leave now, before anyone gets here, I’ll lie and say I didn’t know your faces.”
“Jesus Christ, you’re uptight,” Shaun chuckled. “What’s the big deal? I mean, we might not even see anything, since it’s nighttime and the animals are sleeping. It’s not like we’re stealing a tour.”
Honestly, I have no idea how our species has survived this long when our formative years make us so confidently stupid. “So, why are you even here then?” I asked, folding my arms.
“Why not?” Gary asked.
With that, they were quickly walking around me, toward enclosure one. I hadn’t yet seen the animal in enclosure one, but what I did know was I didn’t want to see it for the first time tonight. Roger’s short and snappy description described it as Bear - Steve. According to procedure in the small manual Andrew had given me, I was supposed to deter any intruders with fact that they were on camera and threaten to call the police. It didn’t say what to do if that didn’t work, but I assume I was supposed to…call the police. And also call Andrew, of course. That didn’t solve my urgent problem though, which was two teenagers who wanted to see something cool.
“That’s it,” I growled, taking my taser in one hand and my pepper spray in the other, hoping the sight of me being armed would deter them. Heading after them, I snapped, “If you guys do not leave, I will make you leave.”
Shaun turned and walked backwards so he could speak to me. “Just because you’ve got a complex since they hired you to look after a place like this, doesn’t mean you have any real authority,” he told me. “Look, call the cops if you want. Tell them some teenagers broke in. Response time around here is probably fifteen minutes, so we’ve got ten minutes, minimum. We just want to see something cool, and then we’ll leave.”
I hate that he called my bluff on the weapons, especially in hindsight. I’m not a confrontational person, and my instincts are always to avoid a fight if possible. So, in this case, my instincts were telling me to call in someone else to help get these clowns out of the zoo, not to use the weapons I had for just such a purpose. It makes me feel helpless and angry knowing that I back down from fights, but I balked at the idea of getting physical with them. Only the fact that that wasn’t supposed to be part of my job kept me from feeling like a complete failure as security.
“The animals here are not puppies,” I finally exclaimed. “Some of them are territorial. They could seriously hurt you.”
They finally slowed their pace as they closed in on the gate to the wooden fence. “What are you talking about, territorial? They’re zoo animals,” Gary said.
“This is a huge zoo, and it’s more like a preserve,” I sighed. “It backs up into the forest. These animals build their homes here, scent mark the boundaries, and regularly eat small animals that come in through the bars of the fence to explore. So, like I said. These. Are not. Puppies.”
The two of them finally came to a stop at the gate, looking at me warily. “With this fence, how dangerous could they be?” Gary asked. I didn’t answer. Shaun scanned the expanse behind the gate and Gary looked around, making it clear what he was looking for when he said, “Where are all the signs and shit?”
“There’s a tour guide,” I said. “They don’t need signs.”
“Okay, so, what’s in here?”
Shaking my head, I let out a sigh. “It’s time to leave. I’m serious.”
Gary glared at me for a beat and then said the worst word possible. “Whatever.” Then he turned and unlatched the gate, walking through.
“Gary!” I shouted, stopping short at the threshold. Shaun walked past me, and I made a grab for him, but was too slow. I’ll regret that until the day I die.
Halted at the gate like there was an invisible force field keeping me out in just as it kept the animals in, I officially started panicking. I’d messed up, and now I couldn’t even hit them with either the pepper spray or the taser unless I wanted them to be easy prey.
My eyes scanned the smaller plants along the fence, which slowly grew in average height the closer you got to the tree line. The trees were surprisingly close to the fence, only a few yards in. Also, there were no footprints, no path that only grew small weeds from an animal that often paced back and forth, so I wasn’t sure how often it came out of the trees. Maybe it didn’t.
I wondered if there was another lake, maybe a small pond, that I didn’t know about further in, if the animal lived there. Or maybe this one was relatively reclusive, so I might have time to get the boys out. It could be that it had heard the ruckus of voices and decided to investigate, as it did during tours, but it would take a while to get here. Or I could get lucky and whatever it was could have just had a great meal, deciding to pass up the humans within its grasp.
But I was not lucky.
Putting my pepper spray and taser back in their holsters, I took a couple steps back as I pulled out my cell phone and called 911.
There was a brief pause before I heard someone pick up, and a calm female voice spoke, “911, what is your emergency?”
“Yes, I work at a private zoo, address 11842 Lincoln Road,” I spoke, drawing the shocked gazes of both boys. “Two teenage boys broke in, and they’re refusing to leave the property.”
“For real, Ripley?” Gary exclaimed, as if genuinely offended at my actions.
That’s when all hell broke loose.
Gary was standing near enough to the tall trees that he was under the branches, and something dropped on him, its weight crushing him to the ground. He didn’t even have time to scream. Shaun did, though, crying, “What the fuck?” as he stumbled backwards.
“Get out of there!” I screamed, grabbing my taser from its holster and pointing it at the animal.
On top of Gary’s body was something that looked like a koala. The only thing was, it must have been almost twice as big and had an orange, spotted pattern on its fur. The kicker was the teeth. Koalas eat eucalyptus leaves, most people know, so they don’t have much use for many teeth or even sharp teeth. They’re equipped with a pretty pathetic set of chompers.
Whatever this was, I knew it had a full set of teeth made for a meat-eater, because it had bitten down on Gary’s neck and ripped out a chunk of flesh, arterial blood spraying from the wound.
Shaun, unfortunately, did not take the opportunity to run. He stared at his downed friend, just as I did, in horrified fear. And then ran to him. “Gary!” he screamed. “Hey, get the fuck off him!”
“Shaun, don’t!” I shouted.
Whatever Shaun was thinking, it was less about the potential of him being attacked versus the fact of his friend being attacked right at that moment. I’ll say that about him at least: he didn’t just leave his friend to die. Unfortunately, if he had, it might’ve saved him. Throwing himself at the animal, Shaun shoved it off, an impressive show of strength, before grabbing Gary by the arm and trying to pull him to his feet. “Come on!”
I could see that Gary was barely conscious, though. A gash in an artery that was profusely bleeding will do that to a person. I attempted to aim my taser at the animal, but only a split-second passed before it turned and leapt once more, slamming into Shaun and biting his neck. I stumbled back in fear, adrenaline now pumping through me in earnest, as Shaun cried out in terror and fell to the ground before the animal ripped out his throat.
My vision swam at the sight of a copious amount of blood and the sound of Shaun choking on it. Thick chewing sounds came from the animal before it swallowed and then turned to me.
I only realized I’d dropped my cell phone when I heard a faint, panicked voice ask, “Ma’am? Ma’am, are you there?”
Lowering the taser, I slowly took a couple steps forward, picked up the phone, and I quietly said, “Yeah. I’m here.”
It felt like she was speaking from the other end of a long tunnel when I heard, “I’m sending police and EMT right now. What happened? Was someone injured?”
Swallowing hard, I grimaced as tears came to my eyes. Staring at the animal, which was still meeting my gaze unwaveringly, I simply answered, “Yeah. They’re dead.” At that point, the animal grabbed one of the boys by the throat, then the other, and started dragging them into the trees.
She hesitated before asking some more questions, and I replied to them all absently. Eventually, the animal was gone from my sight, but I still walked backwards as I retraced my steps to the security office, exactly like the first time I’d seen Yui. Eventually I arrived at the security room, and my shaky hand swiped the key card to get in. Shutting the door, I told the 911 operator, “I’m safe.”
“Good. The police should be there in ten minutes.”
My brain thought it was funny that it turned out the boys had been right about the timing, but filed it under ‘things to think about later’. “Okay. I have to call my boss.”
“Just stay on the line with me until the police arrive, okay?”
“It’s okay. I’m fine,” I said quietly. “I just really need to call my boss.”
In spite of her protests, I hung up. The silence of the room rang in my ears and I slowly sat down in my chair, pulling up Andrew’s number.
After four rings, he picked up, his voice drowsy but tense, knowing I’d only call if something had happened. “Ripley? What’s wrong?”
It took me a moment to find my voice. “Two teenagers broke in. They’re dead. Steve killed them.”
“Oh, fuck,” he breathed. After a few beats, he said, “Okay, all right, I’ll, ah, I’ll be there as soon as I can. Did you call the police already?”
“I was on the phone before it even happened, saying they broke in.” I grimaced at that. I was supposed to call my boss first, not the police. That let him determine what actions to take.
Andrew let out a breath. “Okay. I’m assuming Steve took the bodies?”
“Yeah.”
“All right, I’ll call Suzanne and have her put Steve down for a nap, and then get the bodies back to where the EMTs can get them.”
That confused me, and I didn’t really know what to say, so I went with, “I’m sorry, Andrew. I should’ve tried harder to get them to leave. Even tasing and pepper spraying them would’ve-”
“Ripley, this is not your fault,” he said firmly. “I’ll be there soon as I can, all right?”
We ended the conversation and I glanced at the screen of cameras, which was how I’d left it, focused on that section of the fence where the boys had climbed in, with the view enlarged to take up most of the screen. I stared at it until the police arrived.
When the motorcade of flashing lights were visible at the end of the road through one of the cameras, I pressed the button to open the front gate. Fielding the police officers and the EMTs and their questions, I brought them to the enclosure, and right at the edge of the tree line were the two bodies, looking exactly as I’d last seen them. So, I guess Suzanne knows how to run her zoo and handle things when the worst happens.
Both boys were put into body bags and lifted onto gurneys, and then each one was put into one of the two waiting ambulances. Andrew arrived before too long and answered all the questions the police had for him, the ones I didn’t know how to answer. Also the questions that I didn’t really feel comfortable answering, like, “What species of bear is it exactly? And why is there just this flimsy fence here?” I watched from a distance as they took his statement and, I determined by watching their facial expressions, Andrew seemed to answer their questions to their satisfaction.
The long, exhausting experience ended when the last of them left, and Andrew and I went back to the main building, going to his office. Instead of sitting in his desk chair, my boss vied for the couch that sat against one wall, used occasionally by visitors. I sat at the other end, leaning back heavily into the cushions.
Andrew spoke first, echoing his earlier sentiments and immediately making it clear that what occurred wasn’t my fault. I felt some anger at myself, mostly because I knew that if I’d used one of my weapons on one of them, they’d still be alive. But I hadn’t wanted to go to such extremes just because they’d climbed over a fence. They were dumb teenagers, right? I’ve never been tased or pepper sprayed, but I’d seen videos on YouTube and it didn’t look like a fun time.
“Look, you said it that first day in your interview, that people are stupid,” he told me. “Teenagers especially. You know that’s a fact. You did the best you could in that moment, so don’t look back and think of what you could’ve done to fix things, because solutions always seem obvious in hindsight. All right?”
“Yeah,” I muttered.
Andrew sent me home at that point, saying he’d take the rest of the shift. I was too weary to object, so I left.
Stanley was still sleeping safely in his bed, and that’s one thing I’m so grateful for. If this job took my brother from me, I’d be done with it. Still, I don’t relish waking up tomorrow and having to face him. I don’t know exactly how he’s going to react to the news, but it’s going to be the worst thing in the world that’s happened to him, mostly because of the guilt of not being able to talk them out of going. The same way I couldn’t talk them out of staying out of an enclosure.
My schedule is still nocturnal, so I’m not tired enough to sleep right now. Hopefully I’ll get sleepy soon. For now, I’ll play one of Stanley’s mindless old school video games with the sound muted. My main goal is to get the image of all that blood out of my head.
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First / Previous
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/storiesbykaren

I would be shocked if no one else has made this connection yet, but I have searched and I can't find it. So, I present to you the facts - a key literary influence in Taylor Swift's magnum opus, The Tortured Poets Department, is none other than our own Rocky Flintstone. While some speculate that the album is about Swift's relationships, I'm here to show you that the album actually takes us on a journey through the Belinda Blinked canon. Thematically, the songs often switch genres and styles, much like we experience in Belinda Blinked - but there are direct lyrical homages as well as musical ones.
If you haven't heard the album yet, perhaps this will change your mind... listen to Guilty as Sin and tell me I'm wrong.

• THE EVIDENCE -

1. Fortnight (feat. Post Malone) - The opening title track of the album sets up a key parallel between TTPD and the Belinda Blinked universe. Swift herself has said this song holds the key to unlocking the rest of the album. The song details a serious love affair, almost impossibly taking place over only a fortnight. The sense of time in this and across the album tests the listener's belief and asks us to suspend logic - could all this possibly happen in such a short stretch of time? isn't that about how long it takes from book 1 - book 3??
This, dear readers, is the key that tells us to look out for the Belinda of it all.
2. The Tortured Poets Department - we have glimpses of the Steeles crew here, but they're not the main focus - hints remain though. "I thought some things I never say - like who uses typewriters anyway?" - classic Belinda, a catty little internal monologue, while staring blankly at someone.
'We're modern idiots' - if this isn't the Glee Team I don't know what to tell you.
'You smoked then ate 7 bars of chocolate' (Bella) / 'tattooed golden retriever' - it's giving Belinda and Clint.
3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys - this is from Helga's perspective, deep undercover - exploring her complex relationship with Pietr Robbins / Wayne Burt as suspect / boss / lover:
We start with her being sick of Robbins' weird behaviour 'Oh, here we go again, /the voices in his head'
Then referring to how she's constantly having to play a part - 'I'm queen of sandcastles he destroys'. Helga recounts how she started to put the evidence together to build a case: 'Cause it fit too right / Puzzle pieces in the dead of night / Should've known it was a matter of time'
'Cause I knew too much / there was danger in the heat of my touch' - alluding to Helga's investigation, she's in real danger if Robbins catches on.
'Once I fix me, he's gonna miss me / Once I fix me / he's gonna miss me' - Robbins takes Helga for granted as the woollen wrapped assistant - but hoo boy when he sees she's a hot FBI agent... being undercover is complicated for Helga though, and bleeds into her other relationships: 'I felt more when we played pretend / Than with all the Kens...' - that's why she's so excited to meet Belinda.
4. Down Bad - this and the next few tracks really take a deep dive into the world of Belinda Blinked.
The opening lines clearly reference Belinda's journey in Book 4 - the suggestions she was the special one, expanding her world from the sales director at Steeles to spy training with James Spooner and fighting evil with C.O.C.K.:
'Did you really beam me up / In a cloud of sparkling dust / Just to do experiments on / Tell me I was the chosen one / Show me that this world is bigger than us / Then sent me back where I came from' - this could also be her visit to heaven then coming back down to Earth (also, the alien references referring to Belinda just being an 'earth resident' perhaps)
'I might just die, it would make no difference / Down bad, waking up in blood / Staring at the sky, come back and pick me up' - Belinda's car crash / near death bomb incident
We move onto the Bisch bit - here we see that it's really the business side of things that motivates Belinda:
'I loved your hostile takeovers / Encounters closer and closer / All your indecent exposures / How dare you say that it's -/' As much as she hates Bisch, she loved the thrill of it all! Being back at Steele's Pots and Pans rounding up RSMs feels mundane in comparison to all the corporate espionage / life and death escapades.
5. So Long, London - this is penned at Belinda's lowest ebb, the point when she thinks she won't get her bonus - this is her imagined resignation letter as she contemplaties packing it all in and moving over to Bisch:
'I stopped CPR, after all it's no use / The spirit was gone, we would never come to / And I'm pissed off you let me give you all that youth for free' - she's reached a point where she can't keep giving it her all with no sign of the big bonus - she's turning 30 soon (??) and she's rethinking what has she got to show for it. She's willing to give up London, her friends, her Glee team for a darker future with Bish: 'For so long, London / Stitches undone / Two graves, one gun / I'll find someone... / And you say I abandoned the ship / But I was going down with it'
'Two graves, one gun' feels a little out of place for a song that at first listen seems to be about a break up - yet it perfectly foreshadows the entwined fates of Spooner and George...
As Rocky uses erotica often as a vehicle for business, here Swift is using the imagery of marriage as an allegory for a stagnating career: 'Just how low did you think I'd go? / Before I'd self-implode / Before I'd have to go be free/ You swore that you loved me but where were the clues? / I died on the altar waiting for the proof ... I'm just mad as hell cause I loved this place'
6. But Daddy I Love Him - at this point in the narrative where Belinda is reaching a professional crisis point, time seems to slip and contract, as it often does with Rocky. She thinks back to a younger self, thinking back to her parents and their disapproval of a relationship, perhaps Clint..
then we slip back into the present dilemma - should she leave Steeles with all the drama that would ensue? her frustration is real: 'I'd rather burn my whole life down / Than listen to one more second of all this bitching and moaning / I'll tell you something about my good name / It's mine alone to disgrace' - that's the Belinda we know and love (shut up Des).
A little later we get more clarity on how Belinda views her many relationships - thinking about the 'judgemental creeps' who claim to want the best for her, and will get it through lecturing her - she knows that external factors can't 'change the beat / Of my heart when he touches me / And counteract the chemistry / And undo the destiny' - this could be all of Belinda's relationships - she follows what she wants, with somehow a thread of destiny running through it all... God nodded indeed.
7. Fresh Out The Slammer - we're jumping around in time again - Belinda's out of the clink babyyy - but plot twist - Bella and Belinda are reunited with Giselle!
Fresh Out The Slammer is basically a chicago style number from the Glee Team girls - Bella and Belinda are just excited to be out: 'Fresh out the slammer / I know who my first call will be to...' but mostly reflects Giselle sharing why she did what she did, and being ready to change: 'And no matter what I've done / It wouldn't matter anyway / Ain't no way I'm gonna screw up / Now that I know what's at stake'
8. Florida!!! (feat Florence + the Machine) - this feels like a glimpse into a future book we haven't read yet. This has Glee Team crime spree / girls trip written all over it. The exclamation points are clearly Rocky inspired - this could absolutely be a chapter title. Jjust picture Bella screaming 'Florida!!!. The whole song could be a new glee team anthem:
Bella: 'I need to forget so / Take me to Florida'
Giselle: 'I got some regrets / I'll bury them in Florida'
all sing: 'Tell me I'm despicable / Say it's unforgivable / At least the dolls are beautiful'
Bella: 'Fuck me up Floridaaa!'
9. Guilty as Sin? - here we go. this is it - the piece de resistance. This song is all about fantasising about a lover - but there are some striking elements that place us in a very specific point in Belinda's life.
The scene: a tombola. All proceeds to support the asses and donkeys trust.
The location: a literal hedge maze.
The seducer: Peter Rouse, writer of strange runes on women's bodies.
Belinda is thinking back to that saturday afternoon - it's like she's still handcuffed to that trellis:
'What if he's written 'mine' on my upper thigh / Only in my mind? / One slip and falling back into the hedge maze / Oh what a way to die' - I'm here to tell you 'written 'mine' on my upper thigh is not a metaphor. It's Peter Rouse, in a black thong, drawing mystical runes that have brought Belinda under his spell. But she's finding it hard to believe it really happened - was it all in her head?
It was such a strange, thrilling experience, and she seems to have genuine feelings for Peter it's now ruining everyday encounters, perhaps even her job: 'My boredom's bone deep / This cage was once just fine / Am I allowed to cry?' - it's changed her whole perspective.
'I keep recalling things we never did / Messy top lip kiss / How I long for our trysts' - a girl just wants to be covered in mud runes again and she cannot stop thinking about it.
'I'm seeing visions, am I bad? / Or mad? Or wise?' - still unclear, she's probably not wise though.
10. Who's Afraid of Little Old Me - time is doing funny things again. We're back with Belinda later in the future timeline- she's gone through the sad phase thinking about leaving Steele's - now she's picturing crashing a company party - with moving to Bish up her sleeve:
'So I leap from the gallows and I levitate down your street / Crash the party like a record scratch as I scream:/ Who's afraid of little old me?!.....Well you should be'
She's contemplating still what the lack of bonus could mean - 'So tell me everything is not about me. / But what if it is? / Then say they didn't do it to hurt me / But what if they did? / I want to snarl and show you / just how disturbed this has made me / You wouldn't last an hour / In the asylum where they raised me' - the asylum = the leather room
The next few songs take us through Giselle's arc:
11. I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) - we've switched plots / gears / locations:
POV: Giselle
Him: George Sylvester
She's trying to tell herself there's a way out of the situation, she can fix him, maybe she can seduce her way out: 'Come close, I'll show you heaven / If you'll be an angel all night / Trust me I can handle me a dangerous man / No really I can...'
but eventually realises she might be in over head:'No really I can / Woah - maybe I can't.' - but at least she gets the last laugh.
12. loml
POV: Giselle / Tony
Post break up - Giselle is coming back into the Steele's fold and navigating things with Tony: 'We embroidered the memories / Of the time I was away' - 'I said, "I don't mind, it takes time" / I thought I was better safe than starry-eyed'
Thinking back on speed of the engagement and wedding: 'You and I go from one kiss to gettin married'
Verse 2 - we switch to Tony's perspective:
'Who's gonna tell me the truth / When you blew in with the winds of fate / And told me I reformed you ... Well you took me to hell, too / And all at once, the ink bleeds / A con man sells a fool a get-love-quick scheme'
'What we thought was for all time / Was momentary'
'All those plot twists and dynamite' - this refers very literally to the twists and turns around the special one plot, and obviously to the bomb.
We hear Tony's hurt on being conned into marriage: 'You shit-talked me under the table / Talking rings and talking cradles / I wish I could un-recall / How we almost had it all...Are they second-hand embarrassed / That I can't get out of bed / Cause something counterfeit's dead'. ouch :(
13. I Can Do It With A Broken Heart
POV: Giselle
We're back with Giselle - doing what she had to do to Tony / Steele's broke her heart - but she had to put on a brave face even while working for Bisch: ''I was grinning like I'm winning, I was hitting my marks - cause I can do it with a broken heart'
She's back in the office, trying to make it up to Tony but putting all her energy into her work: 'I'm so obsessed with him but he avoids me / like the plague / I cry a lot but I am so productive / It's an art / You know you're good when you can even do it with a broken heart'
Belinda and Bella take Giselle back into the Glee team, and give her support: 'They said 'babe you gotta fake it til you make it' / and I did / Lights, camera, bitch smile / In stilettos for miles '
And she really nails it without letting on: 'Cause I'm MISERABLE! And nobody even knows! ' - the closing line? 'Try and come for my job.' - Giselle literally betrayed the whole company, ditched the MD - and still got rehired. That's pots and pans baby.
14. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived - I know, the smallish man who ever lived - but Alfie doesn'r deserve this. It's all about Bisch:
'You hung me on your wall / stabbed me with your push pins' - you just know he pinned up a little picture of Belinda and her CV in that damp schloss.
She's pissed off he's ruined her hot business summer, losing Spooner in the process - but she also can't quite leave it alone, and ultimately he was a disappointing foe: 'You didn't measure up / In any measure of a man / I just want to know / If rusting my sparkling summer was the goal'
She's still wrestling with the batshit bananas of it all - 'were you writing a book? / were you a sleeper cell spy? / in 50 years will all this be declassified?' - at least we have the bean papers to understand the criminal hijinks - but Belinda doesn't have that luxury.
15. The Alchemy - this is Belinda back on top business form. She's giving a speech to the RSMs:
'I circled you on a map / I haven't come around in so long / But I'm coming back so strong' - she's checking in on the regional sales performance and she will be asking the tough questions.
'So when I touch down' (and get a taxi from heathrow, obvs) 'Call the amateurs and / Cut 'em from the team / Ditch the clowns, get the crown / Baby I'm the one to beat' - Belinda is the best. She expects the best from her team, and she will fire anyone who's not bringing it.
'These blokes warm the benches / We been on a winning streak' - 'These blokes' is 100% the RSMs. Let's be honest, the RSMs are just sat around, Belinda's making all the sales but the team gets some credit for the 'winning streak' she's been on.
'Shirts off, and your friends lift you up over their heads / Beer sticking to the floor' - it's happy hour in the Pentra - and Belinda's finally earned her bonus.
'These chemicals hit me like white wine' - The excitement of the sale is as good as a glass of chards.
16. Clara Bow - this is all about the comparisons Belinda gets from her partners, with the obvious implication that Belinda is the new it girl of her time: 'Beauty is a beast that roars / Down on all fours / Demanding "more"' - it's soooo Belinda coded!!
CASE CLOSED.
Honestly though I cannot hear 'back into the hedge maze' without thinking of Belinda. <3

Hi! The queer community in my area is very small and I personally don't see a lot of lgbt people around, much less lesbians, so I decided to give long distance dating a shot. I'm not trying to rush into anything but to be clear, I'm looking for something that might develop into a romantic relationship.
Even though that's what I'm looking for, I don't have an urgency to be in a relationship with just anyone and I hope you don't have one either, if we don't click, it's all good, we can just move on :-). I'd say I'm open to casual relationships too but only in person, I'm not into sexting.
This is me---I'm 31, 5'4 and I'm hispanic and I speak English and Spanish. I'm really into artsy stuff and most of my interests revolve around art. I like to paint, draw, sew and make miniatures; I've recently started learning how to engrave wood for printmaking. I love watching horror movies and I mostly watch them when I'm making things or sewing. I just watched Talk To Me and I really liked it. I'm also really into being a clown and having a sense of humor is important to me. Style wise, I'm mostly femme but lately I just wear baggy, oversized clothes.
I don't have any preferences except these:
Masc/Butch (I mean masculine in style/appearance, I don't have expectations about relationship roles or personality types.) I can explain more if you have questions.
Monogamous
30 or older
No kids currently
I hope this post doesn't sound too robotic but It's honestly so hard to write one, I tried to keep it short and clear. I haven't shared much but we can talk and get to know each other.
*Please only message me if you're okay with sharing pictures of yourself, since I've shared what I look like.
Thank you for reading! If you think we'd be a good match, feel free to message me :-)

Hi , I am a 23 f living in my family home with my boyfriend 25m . I am writing this as I don’t know if my feelings are valid , and if so, what I need to do . But if not, how I need to look at myself.
I’ve struggled my whole life with mental health and self esteem, however even writing that makes me feel like a prick, as I know others have it worse.
Ever since I was little, I remember being screamed and shouted at for the most simple things- dropping orange juice , not being able to get my maths right. I just remember being teased and called names :stupid, a clown , idiot, sometimes even slapped a little. Thinking back to that even now, I still feel cold and scared. I would be moaned at for absolutely everything! Not wanting to wear dresses, or go out , or having my shoes up to loose. I just remember being stressed all of the time. I would hide behind buildings and trees to escape them as I had no where else to go at the age of 4-10. To this day, I’m still made fun of for having doing this. I started developing weird fears because of the stress: I was deeply traumatised by the idea of batteries running out, or being late and the worst of all (still to this day) high ceilings. I remember feeling very alone, and I would cry to try and get love and affection, to stop their anger , anything to make it stop for a moment ! If the crying didn’t work, I would cry louder and louder , but it always resulted in headaches and being left on the floor alone.
There was always these weird self image threats and issues . If I misbehaved, my mum would threaten to cut all of my hair off … which is kinda ducked up as it taught me that beauty is measured by hair length . Also that I had to straighten my hair for events and that I shouldn’t eat too much or I’ll get fat and ugly.
My parents would also search through my room every single moment, in every single corner. Secretly putting spyware on my phones . They would never tell me this but make suspicious comments and like jokes at topics I’d researched or messages I sent … which made me very on edge and embarrassed !
My dad was quite emotionally up and down also, you never knew what thing would spark what reaction or the classic “you kids took up all my time and made me fat”. But when I was little he would play with me and talk to me lots ! Which was great, he was my safe space
Then when I hit around 11, it all got much much much worse. My dad would, self admittedly “not know how to talk to me, and completely emotionally abandon me. My mother, would be always like a hot and cold firework, I never felt comfortable around her trigger.
So, I started looking to other adult figures and role models. Absorbing their personalities and style to an unhealthy degree. Most of these role models were men, as the only female role model I had would critique herself and me in the most negative way… so why would I want to be that? !
So I started not eating lunch and binding my hips so that they wouldn’t grow. I didn’t want to become that. This got worse and worse and worse as the years went on , becoming more depressed and finding new ways to destroy myself. But I still felt this urge to HAVE TO ACT NORMAL and KEEP up my grades . My biggest focus was art, as when I was little my mum would big me up and boast to all the other mums about how great my art was. It made me feel important, and if I wasn’t the best in the school, then I was any use , not good enough.
As my weight dropped to 5 stone at the age of 15 , I was so so so poorly. I thought that it would be the cry for help that my parents needed , much like my childhood crying, it need to get louder until I was heard. But it wasn’t, much like my crying it was just met with an even bigger and angrier RAGE ! My mum would hit me and call me a freak , threatening to call for me to be taken to “the mad house” … but weirdly never did call anyone. She would secretly take pictures of my body to keep on her phone, and compare photos of me then , to the previous year . She would grab me and belittle me , really psychopathically calling me too weak to fight her , and to just “let her win”, as she tried to pin me down. She would always tell me that “she didn’t do anything to deserve this” and “all of the other mums are talking about you and it’s embarrassing” and the constant CLASSIC “how do you think this makes me feel”
On one particular morning , I remember it being so bad , that I climbed out of my window and ran to school when she tried to lock me in. I went upstairs to the mental health room. For the first time, adults didn’t ask about my weight, they just treated me like a real human and not a possession/freak. That was the first time I felt comfortable eating in months and months.
This continued on up until a few years ago. I was Still looking to role male models and was obsessed with the idea of having an older boyfriend to look after me and care for me. It’s all I would dream about and write about. But of course , this lead to a lot of male mental and physical abuse and being with narcissistic men.
Basically to sum this all up, I’m moving out with my current partner into a house soon (woo) and whilst I’m still living at home, I feel fucking miserable, an anxious shell. I’m a tattoo artist now , and I can’t focus on my drawings during the day , In fear of the door swinging open and being screamed at for simple things. My dad doesn’t talk to me , he gets all weird and jittery when I’m near. My mother continues to belittle me and control everything I do, but more from just a traumatised Brain. She makes me feel ugly for every tattoo that I get , yet demands that I tattoo her whenever she feels like it. All because “she helped me get the job” . She ruined my 21st birthday as we share a birthday and it was “her big day” …. Just everything is about how she feels !!!!!!!!!!!!.!:!!;:)£:,):£:)2£:2)):£/&:
I feel deeply on edge as uncomfortable around them both , I feel like a Shell of a human myself and I am absolutely sick and tired of it all. I’m not perfect , but fuck me im THEIR CHILD. Whenever I try to speak to her about anything that she doesn’t agree with (about herself or things that I want to do/ make me unhappy) she just shouts louder than I can calmly explain.
Should I ditch them ? When I move out should I stop contact . She already said that she wants a key and to come over lots , and to have a tracker on my phone . She also got angry when I said no . I just don’t think that I can live my own life and feel free until she’s dead or blocked honestly… I just feel so tired and broken, like a bird in a cage
What should I do ? Thank you

Just a list of Gangs/crews in melb that I've compiled into a list Not all of this info is gonna be correct so if any of this is wrong just call me a Fed or sumshit
QAC/9ners//9 Nation based in Tarneit Notable members:M6,Zinomulla,Twobizz,SY,Herbo,JP,M1,MJ,Amac,Montana,Yango,HMHoodz,Ysav,AC Beefs:H-town,OGK,STG,OTK,003z,051,SBG,BDK,Cali🇸🇴,6side,500'365',FOE,M19,97z,Hrs,GMG Allies:07,KBS,33rd They're a mixed race gang. Alot of there members are locked up and get bullied alot in Parky and Cherry Creek with Herbo getting bashed by OGK members in lockup and then Snitching. The reason they repped 9ners is due too Tarneits postcode which is 3029. Of there fallen members,1 was killed by an opp, another killed by another 9ner and 4 died in a car crash. They're known for stabbings. They often rep 3×3, they also go by Gaza. Fallen Members:Memo,Droy,Hashim,
Eastside Drillas/ESD based mainly in Ringwood Notable members: Beefs:SSO,BDKSTG Allies:3977/77,710,FLG
06 based in Berwick Notable members:Abs,Bucks Beefs:003z,38,77 BH28,500(365) Allies:SVB,02z
02z who are based in Endeavour hills Notable members:None Beefs:003z,38,77,RDS, Allies:06
97z/23z who are based in Deer Park Notable members:Kefo,Victory Beefs:BH28,9ners Allies:M19
21st based in St Albans Notable members: None Beefs None Allies:BDK,OGK,STG,SSO Not sure if it a gang or if it's an alliance of gangs all Ik is that it's from St Albans and have ties to 051 in Adelaide
Blood Drill Killers(BDK)/Tookavillanz/400 based in Kings Park Notable members:Tsap,Fredo Allies:051,OGK,SSO,21st,Vc 🦅, Beefs:KBS,710,BBG,FOE,RDS Description:Made up of mostly South Sudo youths,had up to 100 member at one point, have been linked to a murder over in ADL of a KBS member aswell as a murder in Vic, believed to of been formed by Ex Apex members often repped 400 Inactive
Stain Gang/STG/400 who are based in St Albans (Stain gang are BDK's younger's) Notable members:LilK,88Dayoungin,Talibandz,TK Beefs:KBS,710,9ners,RDS,ESD,M19 Allies:BDK,OGK,051, Mainly South Sudos,they bully pretty much all there opps weather it's in lock up or outside. They've been involved in a number of high profile incidents including the murder of a basketballer in the CBD,the shooting death of 2 men in Wyndham Vale,multiple bashings and stabbings. They also make music. There opps often rep SGK or Stain Gang Killer.
Squad Shit Only/SSO/400 based in St Albans Notable members:SSO Lil Apex, Beefs:ESD,FLG,RDS,500(365) Allies:BDK,STG,OGK
Original Gangster Killers/🅾️GK/300 based in Melton Notable Members:ZK,Kutta,Woosky, Duwopp Beefs:9ners,RDS,KBS,M19,FLG/ALG,500 '365', Allies:BDK,STG,SBG,051 Based mainly around Melton, were involved in a fatal clash at St Kilda beach which left 18 yr old Hashim Mohammed dead, he was a member of the 9ners. AllegedlyWere also involved in the riot at Malmesbury YJC in which they bashed a 500 '365' member pretty badly
Reds based in Frankston Notable members: None Beefs:None Allies:None Were just a bunch of Islander,white and Sudo boys pretending to be bloods Not active anymore
Asian Boyz 36/ABZ-36 based in Croydon Notable members: Beefs:NBD Allies:BBZ,BH28
Noble Park called 74/NPBZ(Noble Park Boys) Notable members:Sav-e,Locs Beefs:M37,EBK Allies:
Black Bally Gang/BBG 45 based in the Collingwood flats Notable:BBG Smokey,Double M,TK45,Baby T Beefs:BDK,710,GMG,BH28 Allies: Description: Used to rep Menace To Society, changed to BBG at sometime, made up of boys from the Collingwood flats mostly African youths
BrotherHood28/BH28 based in Werribee south Notable members:28 Reaper Beefs:HP Boyz,97z,SVB,BBG,06 Allies: ABZ-36,BBZ
N×N/3076/6side based in Epping Notable Members:Mr C, Lanks Fallen Members:Djay Beefs:9ners Allies:HTB(H-Town Brothers)
3977/77 🚷based in Cranbourne Notable members:Double G,Flaccø Beefs:02z,06,BDK,STG Allies:38,710,RDS Description: Mainly Africans youths, with some white,afagan and few other races. Have a very serious beef with STG and have been linked too numerous assaults and bashings Also goes by Steppa Squad Members of use 🚷 on snapchat and insta
In sunshine theres 3020
Also in Preston there a clique called 72
OTK/Ozone based in Heidelberg Heights Notable members:HK,Ruger,Pinky,Ksoo,Zak,Tizzy Beefs:47,9ners,RTS,Hrs Allies: OGK,STG,BDK,H-Town(possiblely allied with ABZ as alot of there members rep 3136 which is Croydon)
Everybody Killers based in Dandenong(mainly the housing commission units Notable members:Kush Mink Beefs:74 Allies:None More of a flop set
Vava'u Brothers/VB based in St Albans Notable members:The rap group named after Them Beefs:BH28,M37 Allies:None
Oakleigh Wogs based in Oakleigh Notable members:None Beefs:NGS/710,77 Allies:HP Boyz Used too be very big back in the 90s but in recent years reemerged due too tensions between them and 710
HP Boyz based in Hampton Park Notable members:Mwayz,the rest of the rap group Beefs:NGS/710,BH28,MLBRN,M37 Allies: Oakleigh Wogs The gang HP Boyz isn't really that active anymore, they were very active back in 2018/2019 back when there beef with 710 and BH28 was hot but now days it's not that active, there is another gang in Hampton Park called 76 tho that mainly steals Cars
Get Money Gang/GMG possiblely based in Wyndham Vale/Manors park and or Manor lakes as Ive seen members rep 3024 insta they also have territory in ADL Notable members:Dusa Beefs:BBG 45 Allies:710,9ners,KBS, Finesse Gang Once again Ik fuck all about them other then GMG could also stand for Gay Man Gang cos they recently bashed then stripped BBG smokey of he's pants. Pretty sure they recruit from all over melb and started after the gangs member were rejected from joining BBG
47 Based in Broadmeadows Notable members: Bsav Beefs:OTK,M19,RTS Allies:003z
All the info about M19 is coming frm a member himself M19 based in Saint Albans(up until Ginifer) and Deer Park mainly around the Macca's Notable members:Norms,AK,Opphunter,Nizzy Beefs:47,64,OTK,Hr,Stain Gang,OGK,77,06,9ners,800 Allies:RTS(Ready To Score),97,SSG Fallen members:Bando Apparently the Mstands for Madhouse and the 19 stands 2019 the year they started(this is coming from a member)
Ready To Score/RTS/R2S based in Ascot Vale Notable members:Js,Lekks,Hayden Beefs:60,3030,28,800 Allies:SSG,BBS,M19
SSG based in Fitzroy Notable members: Beefs:800,60 Allies:RTS,M19,ABZ
Section60/60 based in Fawkner Notable members:Chino,Jinx Beefs:TTK,RTS,SSG Allies:
800/8Hunna based in Clayton Notable members:C1 Beefs:SSG Allies:
Hunnid Racks Spartans/HRS based outta Caroline Springs Notable members:Tugga,Perry,Trappy,Jreenchy,ZK Beefs:OTK,M19 Allies:
037 based outta Hillside Beefs:M19 Allies:
Southsiders No Outsiders/SNO based in Dandy Beefs:02 Allies:
Southeast Viti Boyz/SVB Beefs:BH28 Allies:06,KVT Are the Melbourne set of KVT
Credit for info on these gangs goes too Swimming-Astronaut95
358 based around the East and Southeast Notable members:Hk,Pops Beefs:Beef pretty much most of the southeast and Eastside Allies:Stain gang/400,06 Not really a thing anymore but there are still afew members who still rep it The guy who created it(Pops)had alot of connections to the Westside and Stain gang with him also bring mates wiv Lilk
38Babyz based in Weir Views Notable members: Beefs:GDG Allies:
Gangs which exist but I don't have now there area A1 38 Southeast VT Boyz 6Side(pretty sure there based outta Epping/Croydon) C4 Kill To Survive(KTS) Credit for info on these gangs goes to Otherwise-Skirt-7475
Family Over Everything(FOE) based in Pakenham Notable members: Torretto, LK, SosaSav. Beef: 06, BDK, STG, 400, 051, OGK, 9 Nation (9ners), 21st, SSO. Allies:38, 300, 600, 500, 365, 1038, 710NGS, 003z. Description, This group emerged after many mentions from 2x in his songs. They have been very active making songs every week. They have scored many points on their opps. (Stabbings, Drills etc
500 '365' based in Cranbourne notable members: Double G, Bsav, MP, Cj, Shooks aka Skrilla, Mox, SosaSav, G6. Beefs: 003z, 06, BDK, STG, 400, 051, OGK, 9 Nation (9ners), 21st, SSO, BH28, BDK, 02. Allies:, RDS, 77, 300, 600, 710, 38, FOE. Description: Originally called Steppa Squad, 500 is a mainly south Sudanese gang with some Somali and Samoans They are very active and have been releasing music under the label 2Proper. Most of the members have been getting locked up due to the involvement to stabbings and criminal behavior, some of them have received attempted murder charges at the ages of 11 - 13. They have killed many opps. They have access to guns and have shot at many opps
(Double G ran thru P1 and P2s House when their family was home he ended up stabbing P1, also i've heard multiple songs between Double G and Flaaco. "Flaaco likes talking on the net when I catch him call me the grim reaper." "Double G stop wit the chit chat." I'm pretty sure this is how this beef started.)
003z Based in Hallam Notable members Flaaco, JP, Nuski, P1, P2, HBK, Double K, Rsav Beefs:500, 06, 02, 9 Nation Allies: 38, FOE,47 Description: 003z is a mixed gang with Arabs, Africans, Whites, etc. They are some what active manly stealing cars or making music, They don't release yet but they have many files. They score many points on 06 dissing them on basically on every song. Most of southeast knows about this gang.
NGS(Next Generation Shooters),300,600,710 based in Cranbourne(but also draws members frm Pakenham) Notable members: 4Hundo 🕊️, 2x 🕊️, Peezynem, PQ, Double K, Jimmy Carta, G6, Samuel$hmurda, SprintaSantana, JayQ, MoneyMo Beef: BDK, STG, 400, 21st Allies: RDS, 77, 38, 003z, FOE Description: African gang they been active for a while. They have killed many of their opposition. Been getting active a lot. They have many songs right now and they continue to release music on SoundCloud or Youtube. Most members don't rep NGS anymore with most repping 710 Also the reason they are called 710 is due to the 7 being from Cranbournes postcode(3977) and the 10 being from Pakenhams postcode(3910) Fallen Members:4Hundo, 2x
Real deal skeng(RD7/RDS) based in Cranbourne North Notable members:YDK Tha Faceless,77 Dippa and 2Trappy Beefs: 003z, 06, BDK, STG, 400, 051, OGK, 9 Nation (9ners), 21st, SSO, BDK, 02 Allies: 300, 600, 365, 710NGS, 500, 38, FOE, HP Boyz Description: This gang is mainly African descent and Arab. They are known to make music and for their stabbings. Been active since 2020.
Credit for info on these gangs goes to U/sosak4mi
Cali🇸🇴(5Side) based out of the Carlton Housing Commission towers Notable members: Beefs:9ners Allies: Not much about this gang other then they are made up of mostly Somalians and beef the 9ners heavy
Never Back Down(NBD) based out of Hoppers crossing Notable members: Beefs:BBZ Allies:
Woodlum based out of Collingwood Notable members: Beefs: Allies: BBG youngins
Credit for info on these gangs goes to North_Flight6831
Front Line Gang/FLG/ALG based in Cranbourne North and East Notable members:Drilla,herbo,peezy,tglizz,double o tsav,wunna Beefs:Stg,358,ogk,bbg,71 Allies:710,ESD There the younger's to 710
Inactive gangs in melb Wezza Bloods(Werribee) Footscray Boys(Footscray) Sunshine Boys(Sunshine) Sunshine Crips(Sunshine) HCB/Hoppers crossing Boys(Hoppers crossing) KPC/Kings Park Crew(Kings Park) D-Block(Deer Park) Laverton Boys(Laverton) YRB/Young Richmond Boys(Richmond) H2K/Hard 2 Kill(Richmond) AVB/Ascot Vale Boys(Ascot Vale) Flemington Boys(Flemington) NMB/North Melb Boys(North Melb) C-Town Soldiers(Cranbourne) Reservoir Bloods(Reservoir) Braybrook Boys(Braybrook) Tottenham Crew(Tottenham) Altown Boys(Altona) Yellow Klique(Richmond but territory was only Elizabeth St housing towers) Bout The Cash/BTC(Footscray)

I just need to vent.
What the fuck is up with these clowns thinking they're qualified to be mentors? I learned and honed my trade skills on my own "bootstrap style". After almost 15 years in, I can hold my own...
Why in God's name does every place I go to have some gray haired freaks that thinks they can out perform me or knows something I don't? That entire generation can be replaced by two books and a youtube video. How do I know this? Because that's how I came to learn what I know.
I don't care about your "experience" and years in blah blah blah. Your life has been wasted and you are now irrelevant. Whatever identity you draw from your professional is nothing short of sad and inspires me not to take vainglorious pride in something I am forced to do to make ends meet.

All original pressings unless noted.
Grading is sleeve/vinyl.
$6 flat shipping
photos / https://imgur.com/a/Ra0wYTk
-ROCK / COUNTRY
Blackfoot - Blackfoot (VG/VG+) w/ inner $10
David Bowie - Station To Station (VG+/VG) w/ inner $20
Johnny Cash - The Fabulous Johnny Cash (VG/VG) $10
Deep Purple - Machine Head (VG+/VG+) w/ lyric insert $30
Derek & The Dominoes - Derek & The Dominoes (VG+/VG) RSO labels, sides 1,3, & 4 VG, side 2 VG $10
Doors - The Soft Parade (VG/VG+) 1970 club press, RL $15
Bob Dylan - Highway 61 Revisited (VG/VG-) $20
Bob Dylan - White Wonder WWII (G+/G+) unofficial 1970 boot $30
Peter Gabriel - So (VG+/VG+) w/ inner $20
George Harrison - All Things Must Pass (VG-/VG+) w/ all inners & minty poster, box lays flat $55
George Harrison - Cloud Nine (NM-/NM-) in shrink, w/ inner $10
Grand Funk Railroad - Grand Funk (VG/VG) $10
Iron Maiden - Powerslave (VG/VG+) club press, w/ inner $45
James Gang - Rides Again (VG+/VG+) $10
Elton John - Honky Chateau (VG+/NM-) enevlope cover $10
Judas Priest - Sin After Sin (VG/VG+) $15
Kiss - Paul Stanley (VG/VG) w/ inner, signed $85
Led Zeppelin - II (VG+/VG+) $25
Led Zeppelin - IV (VG+/NM-) w/ inner sleeve, 1971 club pressing $25
Lynyrd Skynyrd - One More For The Road (VG+/strong VG) w/ poster $15
John Cougar Mellencamp (VG+/VG+) $7
Modern Sounds - Hank Williams (In Modern Rock-Acid Sound) (VG/VG) $35
Buck Owens - Ruby (NM-/M) sealed $10
Bruce Springsteen - Born In The USA (VG+/VG+) w/ inner & insert $10
Van Morrison - Tupleo Honey (VG+/NM-) palm tree labels, w/ company sleeve $20 SOLD
Pink Floyd - Dark Side Of The Moon (VG/VG+) w/ 1 poster $40
Elvis Presley - Elvis' Golden Records (VG/VG) mono $10
Steely Dan - Countdown To Ecstacy (VG+/VG+) 77 press, w/ insert & company sleeve $20
Steely Dan - Can't Buy A Thrill (VG+/strong VG) 74 press $20
Steely Dan - Pretzel Logic (VG/VG+) yellow label, w/ company inner $15
Steely Dan - Gaucho (VG+/VG+) w/ inner $20
Steppenwolf - The Second (strong VG/strong VG) uk press $20
Jerry Jeff Walker - Five Years Gone (VG/VG+) drawing on cover $20
Neil Young - Journey Through The Past (VG+/VG+) $10 SOLD
Frank Zappa & The Mothers Of Invention - Ruben & The Jets (strong VG/VG) $10
Zoo - Zoo (VG+/VG+) $35 SOLD
WWF - The Wrestling Album (VG+/VG+) $30
Very Special Christmas (VG/VG) $10
Cat Power - The Covers Record (VG+/VG+) $15
-HIP HOP / R&B
Brother Ali - The Truth Is Here (NM-/NM-) $85
D'Angelo - Voodoo (VG+/VG+) $120
DJ Babu - The Beat Tape (VG/VG+) $25
J Dilla - The Shinning (VG+/NM) $40
Freddie Gibbs - Pinata (Alex Goose Remix) (VG+/M) unopened, unplayed #347/500 $170
Madvillian - Four Tet Remixes (VG+/VG+) in shrink $20
Maxwell - Maxwell's Urban Hang Suite (VG/VG) $50
Jill Scott - Who Is Jill Scott (VG/VG) $40
Outkast - SpootieOttieDopalisicious 12" (VG/VG+) pink marble promo $45
Jay Z - American Gangster - Acapellas (VG+/VG+) in shrink, w/ hype $50
Jay Z - Black Album - Acapellas (VG+/VG+) $15
-FUNK / SOUL / GOSPEL / LATIN
Rance Allen Group - Rance Allen Group (VG-/VG+) promo $20
Joe Bataan - Salsoul (VG+/strong VG) $70
Joe Bataan - Saint Latin's Day Massacre (VG/VG) mono $170
Chet Baker - Live In Chateauvallon in 1978 (VG+/NM-) $40
James Brown - Live At The Apollo (VG/VG) 66 press $25
Donald Byrd - At The Half Note Cafe (VG+/NM) 2015 press, in shrink $10
Joe Cuba Sextet - Wanted Dead Or Alive (VG-/VG) mono $10
Gil Evans - Out Of The Cool (VG+/strong VG) blue/green labels $15
Gil Evans - Into The Hot (VG/strong VG) blue/green labels $10
Richard Evans - Dealing With Hard Times (VG+/VG+) mono promo $40
Impressions - Check Out Your Mind! (VG/VG+) $20
Howard Lemon Singers - Message For Today (VG+/VG+) promo, Gospel Truth Label $9
Gorgio Moroder - Son Of My Father (strong VG/VG+) white label promo $70
Music Inc. - Abscretions 7" (VG+/NM) promo, deadstock, multiple copies available $35
Ralph Robles - Taking Over / Conquistando (VG+/strong VG) mono, in shrink $220
Objective Exotic Directions (funk comp - Galt McDermot, Ambassadors, Animated Egg) (VG+/VG) UK press $20
Otis Redding - The Otis Redding Dictionary Of Soul (VG+/strong VG) $25
Staple Singers - Be Altitude : Respect Yourself (NM/VG+) $25
Larry Saunders - Free Angela (VG+/VG+) 2013 Secret Stash reissue, #249/350, in shrink, no 7" $20
Donna Summer - This Time I Know It's For Real (NM-/M) sealed $10
Carla Thomas - Memphis Queen (VG+/VG+) $20
Gabor Szabo - Dreams (VG+/VG) $85
Cecil Taylor - In Transition (VG-/VG+) $10
Andrea Vereen & The St. Marks Choir - Oh, Say Can You See (VG+/VG+) in shrink, mca rainbow label $175
La Wanda Page - Mutha (VG+/VG) hilarious raunchy comedy $10
Denny Zeitlin - Carnival (VG+/VG+) $10
Songs Of Meter Park (VG+/NM) partially sealed - shrink torn, $10
Music De Wolfe - Meeting Point (VG/VG) $30

I'm looking for book recommendations for reading for yourself with a focus on self discovery.
I've been doing a daily 1-card draw for 2 months. I'm learning a lot and growing more confident in my interpretations. I have two books* that provide good overviews of each card's meaning, but both books tend to be focused on interpreting the card for someone else. I have also used Mary Greer's Tarot for Your Self, and it is sometimes helpful, but some of her options feel like a stretch; for instance, how can the Two of Pentacles mean journalism, out of balance, clowning around, and computer crash (as well as 20 other possible interpretations)?
* The two books I'm using regularly are Kristoffer Hughes' companion for the Celtic Tarot deck (the deck I'm using) and Jack Chanek's Tarot for Real Life.

Welcome back to my running series of WWF PPV Reviews from a ‘blind’ perspective (I have no idea what’s going to happen; the results, the feuds or how good any of the matches will be). I have always heard stories of the attitude era and golden age but never watched it myself so I set myself to watching every single PPV event chronologically. I am also watching Wrestling Bios ‘reliving the war’ series to keep me updated inbetween the events with the feuds, and to get excited about upcoming matches.
Before I review the matches, based on the past few episodes of raw and last PPVs I’ll let you know, going into the event, which match I’m most excited for and which feud I’m most excited to see.
The match and feud I’m most excited to see is Shawn vs undertaker. I mean what needs to be said their feud is absolutely legendary, and with my favourite match of all time coming in the future between these two I cant wait to see how they perform together in these early years.
WWF In Your House - Ground Zero 1997 Match Ratings
Goldust vs Brian Pillman 2/5
Scott putski vs Brian Christopher 1/5
Savio vega vs Faarooq vs Crush 0.25/5
El torito vs Max Mini 1.5/5
Tag Fatal 4 way elimination match 1.75/5
The patriot vs Bret Hart 3.25/5
Shawn Michaels vs Undertaker 4.75/5
I cannot believe they pulled the “she’s my love child” story it’s so funny to look back on these storylines. Goldust and Pillman are set to fight and there’s a huge grudge for Goldust here so I’m hoping to see a physical bout.
Which it wasn’t… while it was a good bout with no botched or anything, and it was better than their Summerslam match. I saw pillman was limited due to an ankle problem he had, which is kinda weird with the amount of running around he did, but they still had a decent match. Honestly though this draw of this match was where the story was going and it definitely went 😂 Pillman managed to win the match by whacking Goldust with a brick concealed in marlenas bag, and literally drags marlena to his car where he drove off with her. Classic wwf is so hilarious.
The next match was the first time I’m seeing putski and Christopher wrestle and it was actually going well until that ending. I thought they pulled off some very clean looking spots but the crowd was completely dead for almost all of this match, especially after the match, just no one seemed to care. I didn’t really care for this Brian Christopher he was laughing like a clown or something, not even a figure of speech it was literally like a clown. He might’ve been trying to impersonate Lawler but it was just weird. I’m not sure if putski was actually injured or not it was pretty hard to tell but this match seemed like it was 3 or 4 minutes long of pretty dull action.
Going into the next match and honestly I’m pretty bored of these pointless gang wars but let’s see if it can deliver. Maybe rock will get involved and liven it up but all three competitors in this triple threat have yet to put on a good show during my journey through the new gen/attitude era. Also I feel like this is the first triple threat match I’ve seen since KOTR 1996 so there’s some level of excitement for me as it can make for a really entertaining match when done right.
I was surprised to see crush get a pop as I hadn’t heard one before when he made his entrance, but a big biker dude coming in on a massive Harley will get an American crowd going I suppose 😂. But oh man once the match got going there was actually boos going throughout the stadium for the last 1/3 of it. They were trying some weird thing where they played on the fact that they both used to be part of the NOD in which they’d team with farooq on sadio vega but oh my lord it didn’t work at all, it just came off like they had no idea what they were doing. There were no highlights at all, and the last 5 minutes was crush throwing vega out the ring to use moves solo on farooq to which he’d come back in the ring, break the pin and repeat the process. Then he randomly wants to team with crush after all that?? It made no sense at all and was just a bad match, the crowd wasn’t into it and booed during quite a bit of the match, big miss.
I’m just gunna call it a ‘mini-match’ and I’m sure you’ll know what I’m talking about but it ended up being entertaining for what it was in all fairness, much better than the match I’d just seen anyway. It was more of a funny performance than a match; they both end up biting everyone’s asses? Including the referee, and mini goes and steals lawyers crown too. El torito is bloody nuts, his character is basically to act like a bull so he chases refs and officials around trying to headbutt them, fu**ing nuts 😂. I do think it went on a little too long though, if they’re going to book this kind of match then it should be short and sweet filler rather than dragging it on. There was however a pretty good looking springboard move close to the end so that was cool. There were some impressive moves and the crowd was getting involved but It’s just some filler while the show gets going in the end.
Very good idea having dude love and Austin come out inbetween the matches to relinquish the titles as this crowd REALLY needed some livening up after the past hour of the show. And when Steve starts his promo the crowd eats up every second of it and it’s no surprise because he kills it as usual, what a breath of fresh air SCSA is in the WWF during this era. He’s throwing insults to Vince, to the sergeant to JR and it’s f***ing brilliant. It’s cool seeing dude love backing him up as well I think they actually make a really cool looking tag team. And then out of god damn nowhere he delivers a stunner to JR and the crowd absolutely loses it. I would say at this point he is truly the face of the WWF and it really does suck that he suffered that neck injury and couldn’t wrestle properly for a while, having to change his entire wrestling style because of it, but it was never to his detriment, we’re truly in the stone cold era now.
Before the fatal four way, while the LOD get interviewed I couldn’t help but notice how young Michael Cole looks, I mean obviously it’s over 25 years ago but still cool seeing how long he’s been involved.
I really don’t understand these fatal four way tag matches, they always come off weirdly as you can have two people from the same team in the ring that have to wrestle… but it makes no sense because why not just tag someone else in? I don’t know it’s a weird dynamic and I’m not surprised they dropped this type of match in the future.
It’s a shame LOD was the first to be eliminated because they randomly started beating the godwinns with a metal bucket? It makes 0 sense for them to blindly DQ themselves from getting the tag titles since they were crowd favourites, but okay you do you Vince. I wanted them to win too. I know a few people don’t care for LOD but they’re top 2 tag teams in the wwf right now beside Owen and bulldog. The godwinns get eliminated next (thank god), and they just feel like the most filler tag team I’ve ever seen they’re SOOO bland and basic, they don’t even play up to their hillbilly characters anymore which is a new level of bad I won’t lie. I was really REALLY surprised that headbangers took away the belts though, with the massive push of the hart foundation I thought it was a no brainer. It was awesome seeing Austin come in and disrupt the match, he absolutely brings the whole arena completely alive whenever he does anything. Overall though the match was bad and it went on far too long even with four teams. I think the ending was pretty fun but that was only about 2 minutes of the match that was entertaining the rest just felt veryyyy slow.
Man this event has really gotta pull out some f***ing 5/5 main events for it to be worth watching because we’re 1 hour 45 minutes in without a match over 2/5 at most.
When I hear Kurt angles theme playing I was so happy, excited, confused, and then disappointed when I realised it was 3 or 4 years too early. I had no idea they kept this theme and used it for Kurt angle as well as patriot.
I have a small inkling that Bret hart didn’t perform as well as he could’ve in this match because he was annoyed about Shawn getting the top spot after everything that’s gone down and him working more regularly recently than Shawn. Patriot wasn’t a bad wrestler but his character was extremely bland, what would happen after this feud? He’d just be a guy that’s proud to be from America that looks like a Mexican wrestler… in the time of big characters making the main events he unfortunately doesn’t really fit in that well. His in ring ability was good though, no botches or anything but I just couldn’t really feel myself getting into this match. I didn’t really know if they’d book patriot in to take the wwf title as I was pretty sure they wouldn’t want hart to lose his title being such a huge name in the business right now. It was pretty fun when Vader and bulldog came out for some extra drama with them interfering with each of the wrestlers but it’s not a good sign when a match needs drama like that to elevate it. It’s better than what we’ve seen tonight but not particularly worth watching. If you love Bret hart give it a watch as he was his usual fantastic in ring performer but it’s not one of his best for sure. The crowd was really into it, making the hard camera shake chanting “USA USA”, so that was cool, but I’m not entirely sure if it’s because of the crowd or because it was such a small venue. Also worth noting Bret hart is a perfect heel character, he’s a massive star with a character that works perfectly as a heel because he sprinkles some IRL elements into everything he does. The move of breaking the American flag pole and the strangling patriot with the flag is just brilliant, makes it that extra bit more believable and I love it, Americans however must’ve hated it!
Shawn Michaels entrance was so hilarious, he gets hit by a… idk what that even was, a brown cabbage? He makes BJ notions to the crowd, his pyro doesn’t go off properly in the ring like it usually does, and he still pulled it off because he’s HBK, fantastic. This FEELS like main event material though and I’m really excited for it. Sometimes main events don’t really build up properly and just haven’t got that hype behind it but this match should be great. The first of many times we’d see these legends in the ring together.
Starting off the match right too with undertaker taking out the referee and allowing undertaker to take it to the outside and absolutely lay into Michael’s without a count out. I absolutely loved Shawn’s selling during this match too, it’s so over the top that it’s brilliant, with one of his famous vertical presses while he gets kicked in the belly whilst in the corner, love it. Him begging to the ref to dq undertaker, trying to escape through the door of the set and banging on the door, it all works really well and he plays up undertakers character perfectly. I hate when wrestlers forget they’re supposed to play up this undertaker being very scary it really takes away immersion but Shawn does it perfectly. The boos for undertaker seem to be from the women only and the cheers for Shawn seem to be from the women only, of course 😂. I also love seeing the origins of d generation x, one of my all time favourite tag teams as I’m sure is the same with everyone else. HHH makes his way down to the ring with a referee to replace the numerous ones that have been taken out during this match, and they are just the perfect team together I love it.
The actual match I thought was really really fun. It was absolute chaos and maybe not a wrestling masterclass but you can’t deny it was fun. From start to finish we go through 3 referees, we get strangling with power chords, we get triple H and HBK telling the crowd to suck it, and an amazing back and forth showcase from Michael’s and undertaker. I think this match did an absolutely fantastic job and reinstating the undertaker as the most intimidating wrestler in the wwf. The poor referees during this match though, they got absolutely abused. The only thing I didn’t like about this match was the ending. Another random referee comes to the ring to end the match as a DQ, which is a really stupid ending because illegal stuff had already happened when the other referees came to the ring so why wouldn’t they have ended it then? The action continues after the match with undertaker almost soloing Michael’s and HHH. More officials come to the ring as Michael’s beats the hell out of them. And then other wrestlers are forced to come to the ring to try and break the two up which was awesome to see. This really sets up further matches between the two, and I think that’s was the whole idea of the match which worked well, it’s just that I hate these random DQ endings to main events. We see the undertaker flying over the top rope for… I think the first time? Correct me if I’m wrong but I’m pretty sure that’s the first time I’ve seen it in this era which was of course AWESOME!! Overall a really fun match that sets up for further main events but it’s held back by its weird and stupid decision. It’s still well worth a watch if you enjoy this feud however.
Overall, whilst the main event hit all the right places for me I just don’t think the WWF was ready for a 3 hour event yet. They simply didn’t have the roster for it to be enjoyable and so many of these matches went way longer than they had any business doing. I think Bret hart is always gunna deliver so he was fun to watch but it just want one of his best but the main event hit in every single way apart from the finish which I understand is setting up for further matches but ughhhh it was done weirdly and poorly. If you’re gunna watch this event, skip everything but the main event it’s just not worth sitting through everything else.
Overall rating 2.75/5

[First] [Previous] [Next]
A good shower helps temper my feelings a little bit. I don’t usually take multiple showers on a single day but, after the close encounter with Mom… I really felt like I needed one. I can’t help but feel a little guilty about it too, considering she would feel so terrible if she knew the distress talking with her caused me.

“She tries her best to be good to you and you answer with such contempt. You always find ways to be worse, huh?”

Ignoring myself is easier in the shower. The warm water makes it all feel so distant, after all… but eventually, I have to go out. I can’t just stay here until I die. There’s still work to be done, after all.

When the water stops running, I get out of the shower and dry myself up, get in my pajamas (as I don’t plan to go out or talk to any more people today) and then walk over to the living room’s table. My latest acquisition, ‘The Bastard’s Guide to Magic’, is resting right beside my computer and “The Butterflies of Creation”. To be honest, I am quite excited to start reading and practicing.

Or, well, I was pretty excited. Right now I am more like, neutral towards it. Neutral towards everything. I honestly am just going through the motions of life, and the more I think about that fact, the more bitter I become.

I am seriously considering just throwing the rest of the day in the garbage bin and just dedicating myself to playing and sleeping (again), when suddenly the computer dings. A message?

UndeadVito: hey.
UndeadVito: what’s your favorite kind of engine?

My eyes are glued to the screen for a solid three minutes, as my brain races to try and understand the question. Engine? As in, a car’s engine? Knowing Vito, it had to be a car’s engine. That boy has always been very into cars even at his young age… I remember telling him he was ‘obsessed’ with the stuff…

…To this day I regret saying that. I am sure it has contributed to him being cagey about his interests with others.

No, no time to get lost in guilt. Focus. He’s reaching out, that means he has an idea he wants to share, or he’s bored. Either way, I want to be there for him.

Time to push all that depression deep inside and ignore it for a bit.

xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: I dunno o.o hmm…
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Never really thought of it! uwu Are V-Engines still a thing?
UndeadVito: V-Engines are very much still a thing, ye.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Then that! n.n
UndeadVito: normie.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Bitch! UndeadVito: hey dude there’s nothing wrong with being a normie.
UndeadVito: I have normie friends.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Why are you even asking about this? =w=
UndeadVito: I am designing a new car, wanted to make one for ya.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Awww! n.n That’s very nice, remember to show me when you make the blueprints.
UndeadVito: how many cylinders?
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Shit, uhhhh o.o is 8 a good number?
UndeadVito: it’s an expensive number that’s what it is.
UndeadVito: but hey it’s your car.
UndeadVito: what’s with you and 8 tho?
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: I dunno, I like 8! ewe Sue me!
UndeadVito: I will, don’t think I wont.

I can’t help but smile a little bit. The boy seems to be in a good mood and, really, that got me in a better mood too. Though I know he is also very prone to lying these days… I just hope he is keeping himself out of trouble.

UndeadVito: stuff going well on your side, bro?
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: I… actually have some stuff on my mind. u.u
UndeadVito: oh?
UndeadVito: tell me man, Im here for ya.

Maybe it would be a good example for him to show some vulnerability…

xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: … I’m…
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: … thinking of changing careers.
UndeadVito: called it.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Fuck you UndeadVito: I dont mean it in a bad way dude.
UndeadVito: but as far as I can remember, you’ve looked miserable going to Uni.
UndeadVito: Ive never dared to really question you because, well.
UndeadVito: you’re an oldass man now, you know what you doing.
UndeadVito: but I was worried.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: So it really shows huh? u.u Yeah I’ve… never really felt at home here.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Don’t tell Mom and Dad <.< I wanna tell them myself, when I come to the decision.
UndeadVito: I wont, no worries.
UndeadVito: but thanks for telling me dude.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Thank YOU for listening n.n

This is where I could take the chance to actually ask him about stuff, but then everything would feel a little performative now, wouldn’t it?

xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Do you think I should tell them soon? u.u
UndeadVito: the sooner the better, bro.
UndeadVito: but take your time with things, don’t rush it if you don’t feel like it.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: … I’ll do it after vacation.
UndeadVito: good.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: But I will visit this next weekend n.n
UndeadVito: oh hell yea.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: Do you have vacations too? o.o
UndeadVito: yea.
UndeadVito: oh that reminds me.
UndeadVito: should I tell mom and dad that you’re comin?
UndeadVito: they’re assuming you wont.
xXxCallMeBigCookiexXx: … Yeah, tell’em. uwu I want to spend time with the family at least for a week.
UndeadVito: hell yea.
UndeadVito: alrite, gonna go draw.
UndeadVito: smell ya later.

I sigh for a moment, closing my eyes, feeling myself smiling. This kid… he seems to be trying, at least. Trying to keep the light alive, trying to keep a smiling facade. I should do it as well, no?

My mood is still not fully back up, so I can’t really push myself to open the mysterious Guide… instead, I connect back to Dejima to check the topics I started posting on. Just a few silly conversations about life in the Sleeper World (as they call it), talks about anime and videogames, nothing truly serious.

It reminds me of my old times on VirtualZone, back when I spent my afternoons writing fanfic and participating in collective writing (basically roleplay, really). I was never super popular or anything but, people knew my name from the many works I kept pushing back then. It felt nice to be known, at least a little bit… maybe I could start writing again, posting it here and all?

“I think it’s a wonderful idea. If there is a place to post, of course.”

“Please don’t act like a clown in front of the other mages.”

Sigh.

Checking on the Chatbox, I see two people in. Jeep creep is in there! The guy has always made me curious, maybe this is as good a time as any to talk to him. The problem is that the other person in the chat was souseiseki.

From what I gathered, it was Canny who kept that one under control, but there were no signs of the cool kid of the block here…

“Don’t let her intimidate you. Just go in as usual! Focus on Jeep creep!”

Right!

After taking a few deep breaths and trying to mentally prepare myself, I enter the chatbox.

Tav has connected to the Chatbox
Tav: Hey hey everyone n.n
souseiseki: Hi.
@ Jeep creep: well if it isn’t the person of the hour!
@ Jeep creep: how’s it going Tav? enjoying your time in the forum, I hope?
Tav: Yeah yeah, thanks for asking though =u=b Everyone has been nice!
souseiseki: I haven’t o.o
Tav: Ok, almost everyone eweUu
@ Jeep creep: don’t be a bully, Sou.
souseiseki: don’t tell me what to do old man o.o
souseiseki: just because you got the @ doesn’t mean you can tell me what to do
@ Jeep creep: that’s exactly what it means though.
souseiseki: you people cuddle this guy way too much, it’s disgusting o.o
souseiseki: I’m just being real o.o I don’t know him, I don’t have to be nice.
Tav: It’s fine, really! n.nUu I got used to mean girls in school.
@ Jeep creep: MEAN GIRLS xDDDD
souseiseki: bitch.
souseiseki: I’m the meanest girl.

That gets a chuckle out of me. I hope it was in good humor, at least…

The conversation continues from here, at least for a bit. I ask how they are doing. Souseiseki seems to be having a ‘rotten day’ in her own words, with her teacher giving her ‘the eye’ at college. I can’t believe it, but I find myself kind of empathizing with this bitch about that. I know what it is like to gain the negative attention of a teacher.

Jeep creep, whom Sou calls ‘Mort’ and he insisted I do the same, seemed to have a regular day working at a car repair shop. Now this gets my attention.

Tav: Ah! You work with cars then? n.n
souseiseki: that’s what he said o.o
@ Jeep creep: yep yep!
Tav: Oh nice, my brother is super into cars! o.o he hasn’t taught me much but, I’m curious…
Tav: Today he asked me what my favorite engine was xD
@ Jeep creep: oh yeah? and what did you say?
Tav: Oh shit, not this again OwO
Tav. I said V-engine! V8!
@ Jeep creep: ah hah, a classic!
souseiseki: normie o.o
Tav: That’s what he said! ;w; But what was I supposed to say!? I don’t know zilch about cars!
souseiseki: me neither and even I know that’s a normie one o.o
@ Jeep creep: nothing wrong with liking a popular choice, they’re popular for a reason after all!

Well the man seems mature after all, nice and kind. Although, now that Sou has pointed out they were ‘coddling me’, I am wondering if all this kindness from them was just a front…

No. There is no need to start doubting everyone now, that would only make things more unpleasant. I honestly rather think people are being sincere.

I am thinking when suddenly, a new person pops in.

Canned Tea has joined the Chatbox.
Canned Tea: sup bitches, bros and non-binary hoes
souseiseki: hey canny
@ Jeep creep: hello there cancan
Tav: Hey Canny! n.n!
Canned Tea: what are we talking about?
@ Jeep creep: cars
Canned Tea: my favorite, let’s go

It’s incredible how much Sou mellows when Canny is around. She’s like a completely different person! Attentive, calm, may I even say happy? The conversation devolves into nonsense real soon, but that’s alright by me. I am used to nonsense being thrown around, no real problem…

“Feeling better?”

I think so… I think.

I think I am finally ready to open that first page of the book.

Tav: Alright everyone, I am leaving for now :c I have work to do!
Canned Tea: ah hah, so you found it huh?
Tav: I did, I did! >w< it was hard but, I did!
souseiseki: what are we talking about now?

I doubt for a second. Can I even talk about this book in the chatbox? Considering it is supposed to be a secret…

Canned Tea: things
Canned Tea: and stuff
Canned Tea: nunya biz
souseiseki: o.o
souseiseki: you’re getting awfully chummy with this one.

Is that jealousy I feel in the air? I can’t help but smirk a little bit there. But I shake it off immediately. No, don’t start trouble!

“Homewrecker.”

We don’t even know if those two are a thing! Not to mention, it is not even like that. We’re just…

… Can I really say we’re friends this early?

Acquaintances. We’re acquaintances.

Canned Tea: no idea what you talkin about here
Canned Tea: it’s nothing
souseiseki: o.o
souseiseki: if you say so.
@ Jeep creep: ahhh children these days
@ Jeep creep: it’s so cute
souseiseki: shut the fuck up mort.
Tav: lol Anyways, see you all! n.n/
Tav has disconnected from the Chatbox.

With a satisfied sigh, I turn to check on the book, carefully opening the old thing and whispering the keywords once again, this time watching the ink swirl and shift around the page like the waters in a rowdy river.

So me and some of my classmates were group studying online since may upcoming exam. halfway through our study session we took a break, nagkwentuhan, birubiruan, and draw some memes sa shared white board. while nag kwekwentuhan, a topic about one of our classmate who weren’t able to join our session (since nasa labas siya at the time) was brought up. It was a brief exchange of conversations, basically they talked about how cool his sibling is using a calculator as if his using a phone from the 2000s like yung nokia, yung kapatid kasi niya is the same course as us which is engineering pero higher year. one of my classmates( lets call him dude 1 for less confusion) asks my other classmate (this is dude 2) on the session, dude 2 isthe one close to the guy being talked about. basically dude 1 asked kung sino better looking sa two siblings, and dude 2 replied “no comment, ako pa masisisi”. Our group clown (and lastly this is dude 3) jokingly bantered “bat ka masisisi, edi iniimply mo na better looking kapatid niya?”
they then mention the guy on our gc, to tell what happened, this is the only moment i spoke out of this shenanigans and I jokingly said “panget ka daw pre sabi ni dude 2.” Surprisingly he lashed out, left the gc, then minutes after dm me saying “ano problema niyo pre? trip mo ba ako?” Explain to him the whole details and apologized saying that we weren’t making fun of him or his sibling. we’re specifically making fun of dude 2 for kind of slipping on the question.
it was just kind of absurd to me knowing na he’s been our friend throughout college and we’re making this kind of jokes all the time, and all of the sudden he’s getting offensive to me specifically. just because they were talking about him without his knowledge and i made a joke about it. I know it was kind of an offensive joke on my part, but come on, it’s not like I have an issue with him. why did he have to come at me like that. he could’ve said he was hurt by what I said and I’ll empathized with him. I feel bad now saying what i said, and I beat myself up knowing that I made a mistake double it with the fact that he went a bit aggressive there so now I feel extra bad.

I can see why it is everyone’s favorite. After a rollercoaster of an ending to Red Priest, I was quite apprehensive of Klein’s survival. Being stuck with Amon seems like a fate worse than death, but our boy pulled through with a bit divine intervention. Truly a wielder of good luck. But Amon definitely comes out the winner in this volume, trolling Pallaz with trap, and stealing the blasphemy slate.
Got to see Hermit and Justice take on Botis. Hermit’s myth magic is kind of crazy. Drawing power from myths and fairytales is just as powerful as it sounds. Being able to maintain a mythical creature state for 15 seconds at her sequence is really an unfair advantage. Justice’s mind fuckery is so subtle but powerful, thank god she’s one of the good guys because I would not want Audrey as an enemy. During the war, we see Justice take on the whole army of beyonders. So bad ass.
Fors willing to be the bait, just to repay her teacher whom she has already outgrown really says a lot about her. She’s someone who is motivated by gratitude. I actually think she might have feelings for Dorian, she really goes above and beyond for her mentor. I mean she doesn’t even really need anything from Botis, she’s just doing it because he hurt Dorian and his family sometime before she even met him.
Emlyn/moon seems to be a rising star among his race, finding common ground with Sharron and Maric to take down a shaman king.
Star being assigned the task of investigating the TC is just the height of irony. Him flipping up a “random” star card as an example was one of my favorite moments in the volume. What a troll.
Alger given a mission by the elf queen was kind of random. Seems like this will be a long term mission, if only Klein kept the book of catastrophes then this mission would be done by now.
Klein wandering the forsaken lands helping moon city and spreading the religion of the fool while hunting Kotar was interesting. But the actual fight with Kotar was anticlimactic. That puppy just ran away…. I thought he had a good chance of winning so I didn’t really get it.
Little Sun, Lovia, Colin and World working together to take on Sasrir was definitely the highlight of the volume. Finally meeting Derrick in person, but in his clown persona and in half mythical creature form. I really miss the lunatic Klein, just going full tilt. Lovia’s and Colin’s death was expected but still sad but the payoff was that their people finally escaped the cursed land. Finally, some real hope!

(Hi! This is the first time I've posted a long text about the society of keys. I hope you like it. It about Edward and Erin. I know long texts don't usually work here. But I made this from the heart and I wanted to share it with you. Without further ado, let's get started!)
Out of Continuity: Lair of the Society of Keys
The basement/clinic was completely silent, only disturbed by the occasional beeping of one of the Medical Teams. Suddenly the 5 members of the society entered, all carrying Erin, who was in a very weak state of health, black marks came out of her mouth, and spread across her skin.
Elizabeth: Leave her on the bed, carefully…
They gently placed her on her bed, while they hooked her up to monitors to view her vital signs. Which were at worryingly low levels. The 5 members left all their keys on top of Edward's desk. Next to a small black device similar to a wristwatch.
Eechiro: Damn, what did they inject herwith?
Eric: No idea, that guy came out of nowhere, although he left this syringe behind.
Elizabeth: We have more important issues right now. Her signs are stable but they are declining at a worrying speed, we have to find a way to cure her...
Edward moves away a little to lean against one of the laboratory counters. His mind was still racing, Erin's voice began to hit his psyche. Repeating her name over and over again. Until his mind decided to take him to THAT night. He could feel like Erin was hugging him...
"Please…"
His pupils shrank, turning into small black dots. His arms had the reflex of trying to hug the air in front of him. The only thing that could bring him back to reality was Eechiro's clicking noises. Which was in front of him, trying to get his attention, while he repeated his name.
“Edward! Edward! Richter!” Eechiro gave up and returned to the rest of the society, who were surrounding Erin “Nothing! "He's like in Shock, I can't get him out of there!"
Edelgard: “Leave it, we have to do something soon! If we don't find a way to cure her, she's going to die."
Those last words gave Edward the boost he needed, without saying a single word. He approached his desk and took 5 keys next to the strange clock. After this, he began to leave the basement. While he put the watch on his wrist.
“We have to make a plan to get into his base, Edward, do you have any ideas…?” Eric noticed that Edward was leaving the basement, and after a quick glance he also saw that he had taken the keys. “Get him, it’s trying to leave the house!”
The four members of the society followed Edward who walked determinedly towards the door to leave the society base. Just a few meters away, Elizabeth and Eechiro began to pull his arms. While Edelgard held him by the back of the neck.
Eechiro: “You're not leaving!”
Edward quickly crouched and performed a roundhouse kick to knock down the three who were trying to pin him down. Eric placed himself between Edward and the door to prevent him from leaving.
Eric: “Edward, No! We need a plan!" He said as he held on to the door frame to prevent Edward from pushing him.
“ERIC, I KNOW YOU HAVE GOOD INTENTION. BUT I ASK YOU TO GET OUT OF THE WAY” Edward said as he looked at the floor. Eric remained immovable in place.
“I can't do that Edward, I know you're angry. But going like this is…” Eric didn't finish his sentence, because Edward put his hand on his shoulder, after which he made eye contact with him. Eric looked closely into the eyes of forensic. It wasn't the look of someone angry, but of someone scared and determined. For the first time, he could see a look on Edward that wasn't one of indifference. But of absolute concern. After which, the young diver take his decision, getting out of the way. Edward just nodded his head and walked out the door. When Elizabeth, Edelgard and Eechiro stood up they went directly to face Eric.
Eechiro: “What did you do Eric? You went crazy. He ran away and take the keys!”
Elizabeth: “He didn't take everything… he lefts Erin's key. Although Eechiro is right, what were you thinking? Did you let him go alone to face an army? What were you thinking?”
Eric: “You didn't see it… that look was relentless. I'm afraid of what will happen..."
Edelgard: “If you were afraid, why did you let him go?”
Eric: “I'm not afraid for Edward... I'm afraid for whoever decides to stand in his way. Although that is secondary now, We have to make sure we keep her alive.... Come on, let's get moving!”
Universe 18-24-53: Lair of the Steelwater.
Edward arrived at the outskirts of a bar, from outside he could see multiple men sitting at the tables. Most of them had baseball bats or brass knuckles. At the centre table there were four men playing poker. After a few seconds of thinking, he decided to go inside.
“Look and cry gentlemen, I have Full House,” said a man as he slammed the table hard. Another responded to him, as he revealed his cards, “Very interesting, but…”
"What!? An R-Royal straight!? “That's impossible, you bastard,” said the first, while he looked at his partner's letters in astonishment. The lucky gangster was about to say something, until suddenly, Edward grabbed his sleeve, causing multiple hidden cards to fall out.
The gangster was surprised by the presence of Edward standing next to them. "Where the hell did it come from?" Wait… you cheated!?” The gangster replied, now addressing his partner.
“O-Of course not… and also who the hell is this blue-haired?” Said the other man who was still sitting. A dead silence was maintained until multiple windows were heard breaking. When Edward turned around he saw a man at another table, with the bat in his hand. He had dropped his beer on the floor in shock. “Idiots! That blue-haired is one of those multiverse travellers! The Forensic Killer! You let the enemy in!
"What!?" The Full House man lunged at Edward, who simply dodged him. Placing his leg to cause the gangster to fall to the ground, the man's forehead collided with one of the wooden chairs. The other men launched themselves at Edward, who limited himself to Dodge, and responded to them with the furniture of the place. He attacked them with chairs, plates. Even with the same poker cards. “Why don't you die!?” It was probably the phrase that was repeated the most in that fight.
When there were only two men left, they both decided to distance themselves from Edward, and tried to go to the back of the bar. Quickly, Edward took out a pair of sharp metal scissors from his pocket and threw them hard, aiming for the head of one of the men. Which remained nailed to the wall next to the door, while his companion managed to escape. Edward followed at a fast pace, but without running, maintaining unwavering composure. Which only generated more fear in the man who ran.
Edward followed the man to some underground warehouses. The contrast with the bar was clear, while the first looked like a stereotypical 80s movie, this was more like an apocalypse bunker. The man continued running down the long hallway, until he reached a huge room at the end. Due to the distance he had managed to get from the coroner. He had time to activate the Security system. Edward saw three huge metal doors close between him and the man. At this, Edward said nothing. He just approached and tapped the metal plate in front of him, after which he took out of his pocket one of the keys that he had taken from the base. It had a drawing of a dragon. And small burn marks. Edward took the key and inserted it into a small slot in the device on his wrist, suddenly a flash of orange light invaded the tunnel…
On the other side of the door the Gangster is celebrating — “Let's see how you get through that, Four Eyes!” Until he felt 2 presence behind him “What the hell are you doing?” The man turned around to see his boss, a man in a beige suit, with his hair combed back with gel. Next to him was a woman with red hair and green eyes. She dressed in a trench coat, shirt and black pants.
"Boss! Miss Octavia! “He is the coroner, he is here, and he has eliminated everyone in the bar!” The man said as his legs trembled. The boss hardly flinched. While the woman only managed to murmur a phrase, “I was already wondering when we would see each other again, Edward.”
The man guided his boss and the redhead to a screen, which showed the security camera in the hallway. “You don't need to worry anyway, there are three metal doors between him and us. Look… there is no way he can pass- WHAT?”
The three of them were stunned. The metal on the doors was melting. Edward, dressed in a black and orange kimono, shooting a burst of fire. Making a circle to melt the door. The boss rushed towards his minion, holding him by the shoulders. “You told me he was the coroner, not the arsonist!”
“He's the coroner, I don't have the slightest idea how he's throwing fire.” The boss released his minion and approached the redhead. “Listen to me, Octavia. You told me that if he eliminated one of those crazy people, The Guardians would fulfil a wish of mine. But you didn't tell me that they would come to try to destroy me.” The woman broke her silence and said, “Calm down, Tragliatore. Our pact still stands. The guardians will fulfil your greatest wish. You have my word as a Detective” The redhead said as she put her hand on his shoulder.
"Boss! He already went through 2 of the doors! Look” The henchman shouted at his boss, while he pointed at the door that was turning increasingly reddish. The boss removed Octavia's hand from his shoulder. “Quickly, you lazy bunch, everyone pointing at the door.” all the soldiers pointed directly towards the door. “I want anyone who walks through that door with more holes than a damn sieve.”
Multiple men stood at a safe distance from the melting door. Everyone was waiting for what was about to happen. The sound of the flame on the other side of the door invaded the environment, until suddenly... Brain. Causing chills to almost all the people present there. A yellow glow could be seen from under the door that was melting…
The silence was interrupted by the sudden ejection of the door, which was thrown directly towards the soldiers in front. A large amount of smoke came out of the hole that was left. And a couple of yellow dots lit up. Edward ran out of the smoke, wearing a black trench coat, the inside of which shone bright yellow. In his face there was a pair of Goggles, also yellow, which emitted an intense light.
"There is! “Shoot him!” He shouted loudly, as Octavia dragged him towards a door to get him away from the shooting. The henchmen fired volleys of bullets at Edward, who was blocking the shots with Edelgard's trench coat.
Edward tackled one of the men and took cover behind some wooden boxes. He took the gun from the anklet, knocked out the guard next to him and took his gun from him. To start responding to shots. Taking advantage of the lens aiming system. After several minutes, Edward realized that he needed to increase speed... He removed the key that was inserted into the device. Which had the symbol of a Sniper sight, I inserted another one that had the symbol of skates.
After this, he threw his pistol into the air, while a green light enveloped him. The gangsters were perplexed, watching as the gun transformed into a UZI with neon green markings. They were even more perplexed, when Edward jumped out from behind the box... Dressed in a black one-piece suit, with silver lines. In large white letters it was written "Ritcher" and a number 3 in large.
Edward caught the UZI out of the air, and it clicked on his heels. The white soles began to glow, and he levitated a few centimetres from the floor. The next thing the gangsters saw was this blue-haired boy attacking them while he fired with the UZI.
“Quickly, Tragliatore. Over here!” She told Octavia to the mafia leader, As she dragged him through one of the doors, and she kept crouched down so as not to be seen.
Edward continued to dodge bullets while he in turn returned fire. He quickly positioned himself in the centre of the room, and began to spin on its axis at high speed, while he continued shooting with the UZI and one of the gangsters' weapons. Generating a storm of bullets, which filled the room. When he stopped, Edward realized that he had made holes in all the walls, covers and enemies in the place. He began to walk towards the hallway that Tragliatore left down. With all the calm in the world, he removed the key from the device, and placed a different one with the symbol of an Oxygen mask and a Sickle.
“Come in! Come in! Quick!" Octavia shouted at Tragliatore, while holding the door of a small laboratory, which had a small window with a curtain, inside was another of the henchmen, dressed in a white coat. After entering, Octavia's attention was quickly caught by a shelf with some books. Tragliatore watched as his protector began to search the bookshelf. “What's happening, boss? I heard a lot of gunshots and-” Quickly, the scientist's words were interrupted by the screams of their leader. “That doesn't matter now! We are under attack, scan the bunker. I want to see how many of my men are still alive!” The henchman typed something on a nearby computer. While Tragliatore was still confused by what Octavia was doing. He was about to ask her, when his employee's surprised moan distracted him. “Bo-boss, there are only four living beings left in the Building…” Tragliatore raised his hands to his face, passing them all over his face, while he let out a long sigh through his mouth.
“Okay, okay, it's manageable, it's manageable… Octavia, we need a plan, can you think of it… Octavia!?” The gangster was surprised when he saw the red-haired girl, with a book from which a white glow came out. And a white circle surrounded her. “I'm sorry, boy, but our deal is going to have to end here…” When Tragliatore tried to stop her, he realized that he couldn't get through the circle. “This was not what was agreed upon, you said that The Guardians were going to fulfil my wish…” Octavia tore the pages from the book, and held them up. “I told you that they were going to grant your wish…” He released her leaves, which began to orbit around her. “If you survived…” Tragliatore was about to reply, until his minion shouted at him, with a tone of perennial terror in his voice. "MISTER! “She's coming down the hallway, she's coming this way.” Tragliatore's shock was evident in his eyes. And when he turned around to look to Octavia for a solution, he saw that she had disappeared, and the circle on the floor was on fire.
The scientist quickly approached Tragliatore, holding him by the shoulders, his body aligned with the door. On the other side of which footsteps could be heard in the distance. “What do we do now, boss? There are only the two of us left, I don't want to die! My notes are still on the table, if he finds out that I designed that poison, I don't know what he'll do to me!” Tragliatore quickly slapped the soldier away from him. “We're not going to give up, listen this is what we're going to-”
Before Tragliatore could finish the sentence, a metal sickle came flying through the door window. The sickle hit the scientist directly and stuck into the wall. Blood began to drip from the inert body. Tragliatore recoiled in shock, blood had splattered on his face.
The bottom of the Sickle opened and a small stream of water came out, which floated forming a hand. Which I grab the sickle and take it out of the wall. Causing the man to fall to the floor, Tragliatore watched in shock as his hand stopped in front of the door and slammed hard against the handle. Causing the door to open.
Edward entered through the door, dressed in a black jacket with grey sleeves, accompanied by black neoprene pants. The footsteps of his boots broke the silence of the room like thunder in the night. His face was covered by a hood, accompanied by a black oxygen mask. Tragliatore tried to pull the gun from him, but was quickly restrained by Edward. Which he held against the wall.
“What the fuck do you want? If you're going to kill me, do it now!" Tragliatore tried to say with the most threatening tone he could. Edward remained silent, taking one of his scissors out of his pocket, beginning to run it across the neck of the mafia leader. "Wait! Wait! You want money? “I can give you money.” At the offer, Edward stuck the scissors into Tragliatore's leg. Causing blood to flow out, along with a gasp of pain “Uh… Okay, Okay, no money. What do you want?"
Edward took out the syringe with a black liquid from his pocket. And he shook it in front of him. "The poison? Do you want to know how the poison is made? Why do you think I would tell you?” Tragliatore said, finishing his sentence by spitting at Edward. Which was Stoic, took another scissors from his pocket, and stuck it in Tragliatore's hand. Leaving it nailed to the wall. The scream of pain was even louder. “Ugh! In the table! In the notebook on the table!” Edward alone tragliatore, letting the scissors support him. While he went towards what he had come for. He took the leather-bound notebook, and opened it to the page that was marked with a red ribbon. On the same page, the process with which the poison had been made was detailed.
After seeing this, Edward began to walk towards the exit door. A white glow enveloped him and his clothes returned to his usual trench coat. Tragliatore couldn't contain his frustration and shouted at Edward, “Really? You entered my base, you killed all my staff, that's why? All this for that Bea-” Before he could finish the sentence, Edward turned on his heel. Throwing a pair of scissors directly at Tragliatore's forehead. The scissors remained stuck in the wall. Leaving a hole in Tragliatore's face. “DON'T YOU DARE TALK BADLY ABOUT HER IN MY PRESENCE, EVER!" After this, Edward adjusts his bangs, and begins to walk out of the underground base. Willing to achieve it.
Out of Continuity: Lair of the Key Society / One week later…
Erin woke up on the morgue gurney, her eyes slowly opening as her senses began to return. She looked around her, recognizing the medical equipment and monitors that were still beeping softly. She sat up on the bed with some effort, and her gaze fell on Edward, who was sitting next to her.
Edward was completely disheveled, with deep circles under his eyes that marked his tired face. He tapped his foot on the floor at high speed, clearly nervous. Next to him, the table was littered with empty coffee cups and a stopwatch
"Edward?" Erin asked in a weak voice. Edward looked up quickly, his eyes filled with a mix of surprise and relief. Realizing that he hadn't imagined the sound of Erin's voice, he jumped up and hugged her with strength.
"Are you OK!" he exclaimed, he words filled with emotion. Edward moved away from her a little, holding Erin's face with her hands under her cheeks.
"Yeah...I'm fine," Erin responded, still a little disoriented. She noticed the black marks under Edward's eyes and frowned in concern. "My God...Edward, are your eyes okay?"
Edward couldn't help but let out a small laugh. "You wake up from a coma, and the first thing you ask me is if I'm okay?" After that, Edward hugged her again, resting hid jaw on top of her head. Erin just enjoyed the hug, feeling the warmth and security that he gave her.
Suddenly, she felt drops falling on her head. Erin looked up and saw the tears falling from Edward's eyes. "Edward? What's wrong?" she asked in a soft voice.
Edward grabbed her chin again and brought her face closer to his, causing Erin to blush. "That What's going on?" Edward moved forward, planting a kiss on Erin's lips. The shock to Erin's mind was brutal, but soon she began to enjoy it. After several minutes, Edward broke the kiss and looked at Erin with a look he'd never had before. "That's what happens," Edward said softly, hugging her again. "I Love you"

This song is the song where I have the most issue with when it comes to the fans' interpretation of it. Their biggest argument for this is the football references, but they fail to consider that the football metaphors were just a way for Taylor Swift to draw parallels between the (American) football world and her situation.
In this analysis, I'll be doing a line-by-line breakdown of why this is not a Travis Kelce song, but is instead a song that she wrote where she is directly addressing her fans, much like how "But Daddy I Love Him", and "Who's Afraid of Little Old Me" were written.
Here it goes. Please bear with me!
This happens once every few lifetimes

• Suggests a rare and significant event. Taylor's comeback after a major public backlash (Kim Kardashian's Snakegate incident) and hiatus was a unique moment in her career, and in anyone's public career, really.

These chemicals hit me like white wine

• The "chemicals" symbolize the rush of emotions and excitement, akin to the thrill she feels from reconnecting with her fans by organising the Eras Tour.
• "White wine" can imply a pleasant, intoxicating experience, like the support she gets from her fans (look up her sales and streaming charts).

What if I told you I'm back?

• The "you" here directly addresses her fans, announcing her return to the public eye after a period of "absence".
• IMO this line is not at all a shade to Joe, but directly references the line "but I come back stronger than a 90s trend" in willow.

The hospital was a drag / Worst sleep that I ever had

• This song is a direct reference to epiphany, and, on a bigger picture, the pandemic. We must remember that her plans ("Loverfest") were all cancelled thanks to Covid.
• The line also metaphorically refers to her time in "hiding" or dealing with the aftermath of the public fallout, which was a difficult and restless period.

I circled you on a map

• This is the easiest line - she always plans her tour ahead and would choose the locations that she would be performing at.
• This symbolises her plan to reconnect with her fans, targeting them, in each location, specifically as her focus upon her return to touring.

I haven't come around in so long / But I'm coming back so strong

• This line once again emphasises her "hiatus" and assures her fans of her strong comeback.

So when I touch down / Call the amateurs and / Cut 'em from the team / Ditch the clowns, get the crown / Baby I'm the one to beat

• "Touch down" signifies her reentry into the music industry. "Call the amateurs and cut 'em from the team" represents reclaiming her position, emphasizing that she is the top artist and dismissing those who doubted her or tried to take her place.
• "Baby I'm the one to beat" represents her thoughts that she's the one "ahead of the curve" (this is me trying). Now, couple that with her AOTY award for her albums "folklore" and "Midnights", despite the strong competition she had (SZA, Harry Styles, Dua Lipa) - no, folks, Taylor Swift is the one to beat.

Cause the sign on your heart / Said it's still reserved for me

• Indicates the unwavering loyalty of her fans who kept a place for her in their hearts despite her absence and the controversies surrounding her (in general)
• .

Honestly, who are we to fight the alchemy?

• "Alchemy" symbolizes the magical, transformative bond.
• Taylor thinks that the bond between her and her fans is a magical one, one that withstands challenges and changes.
• The Alchemy is what makes her bejeweled.

Hey you, what if I told you we're cool? / That child's play back in school / Is forgiven under my rule

• Now, this line is where she addresses her fans directly. In this line, she is suggesting that she forgave all that drama ("child's play") back during the snakegate. (disclaimer: we know she forgives, she forgets, but she never let's it go -- so let's move on from this one lol)
• But basically, between her and the general fans, she's saying that she's 'moved past' what she thought was her fans' reaction to the the public feuds and media drama.

Now, let's move on to the bridge!
Shirts off, and your friends lift you up over their heads / Beer sticking to the floor / Cheers chanted, cause they said

• This is where she uses the football metaphor to describe the celebratory atmosphere of her concerts, the unity, and the joy her fans experience together.

There was no chance, trying to be / The greatest in the league / Where's the trophy? / He just comes running over to me

• This line! Basically reflects on how she defied the odds and criticism to become the "greatest" with the support of her fans, symbolizing victory and recognition.
• By all means she is currently "the greatest".
  • She is, afterall, the first person in Grammy history to win album of the year four times.
  • Her name is definitely up there as one the greatest of all time, according to Billboard.
  • There's more but I mean, it's like repeating the same points basically.

These blokes warm the benches / We been on a winning streak

• In this line, she is trying to say that everyone else are just warming the benches, while she's the one who's been out there on a winning streak with folklore, midnights, and the eras tour.
• Her usage of "we" here indicates not only "her", but everyone involved, including her fans. This reinforces the alchemy that she has with her fans, and that all of this is a mutual success, i.e. she would not be here without the support of her fans.

He jokes that it's heroin but this time with an "E" / Cause the sign on your heart said it's still reserved for me

• This line is a controversial line, because of her usage of the word "he". Now, who is "he"? Is it Travis Kelce? Or could it be Matty Healy, considering his history with the pills? In this song, this actually does not matter. Why?
  • The point of this line is to symbolise the feeling she feels when she's performing, bejeweled, in glittery skirts, and the feeling insider of her when her fans giving her a standing ovation. To her, this feeling is euphoric. It's like taking heroin.
  • Because she is a female artist, she feels like a heroine in her show. Everyone pays attention to her, and only her. As with all heroines in movies (specifically, those movies with no heroes).
  • Combining both together, "Heroin with an 'E'" signifies as a powerful, euphoric connection (her and her fans) that's not destructive (unlike Heroin), but rather, a positive, euphoric, and uplifting feeling.
• Again, the "sign on your heart" symbolizes fans' loyalty.

and finally, this line....

• Where's the trophy? He just comes running over to me.
  • Before I do a deep dive on this, let's establish the definition of the "trophy". The "trophy" symbolizes ultimate success, victory, or recognition in a competitive field.
  • This line is a rhetorical question. There is no actual "trophy". Taylor Swift is the trophy.
  • Any dudes dating her should recognise that. That she's the trophy.

Addressing the (American) football references in this song:

As mentioned before, the football references in this song are simply metaphors to help illustrate the themes of competition, triumph, and teamwork.

• "So when I touch down"
  
  • While "Touchdown" is a direct reference to scoring in American football, it also, in a literal sense, means refers to when she has landed in her private jet. At this point, we all already know about her and her private jet "news" - I do not need to elaborate on this.
  • "Touching down" symbolizes a notable return after her hiatus and public controversies, Taylor Swift’s "touch down" represents her re-emergence into the public eye with a strong, confident, and elevated status.
  • In the context of the song, it symbolizes Taylor's return to the public eye and re-establishing her position in the music industry.
• "Call the amateurs and / Cut 'em from the team"
  
  • This phrase uses the concept of a sports team to signify separating the less dedicated or less talented (the "amateurs") from the main group. It implies that only the best and most loyal (fans) shall remain, akin to a team selection process in sports.
• "Shirts off, and your friends lift you up over their heads / Beer sticking to the floor / Cheers chanted, cause they said"
  
  • This imagery is reminiscent of celebratory scenes in sports, particularly football games where fans celebrate their team's victories with loud cheers, lifting people in celebration, and the chaotic but joyful atmosphere, very much like the Eras tour.
• "There was no chance, trying to be / The greatest in the league / Where's the trophy?"
  
  • Directly references sports league competition and winning a trophy, which signifies achieving the highest honor or success. And who is she? The Billboard Woman of the Decade. The first person in history to win the AOTY 4 times. One with one of the highest grossing tour of all time. Yes by all accounts she's the music industry.

TLDR: If you switched the "you" in this song to reference "the fans", this song will make complete sense. Now, try giving this song a listen, and think of "you" as "yourself" (the fans).
Taylor Swift's song "The Alchemy," is basically a powerful ode to her fans, chronicling her journey through public scrutiny and her triumphant return to the music industry. It draws parallels to her tumultuous period following the "snake gate" incident with Kim Kardashian and her subsequent hiatus before the release of "Reputation," the lyrics reflect a narrative of resilience, redemption, and the unwavering bond between Swift and her fans.
Once you are able to interpret "you" as "the fans", you'll be able to see, without having to do too much mental gymnastics, that the song is about the transformative and enduring connection Swift shares with her loyal supporters.
If you've made it this far, thank you for reading. Sorry for any typos or grammatical errors - but I hope I helped you made sense of the song!