Hi guys, I am a non-American and I want to admit, I learned a lot about America from non-Americans, especially on the internet. We have Brits like John Oliver, Dutch-Canadians like Not Just Bikes, Scots like The Critical Drinker, even Malaysians like Ian Miles Cheong on Twitter, and plenty of other examples on YouTube, TikTok, etc.
Except for John Oliver who works in America, none of the examples I mentioned above live in America, yet they seem to dedicate their careers to discussing mainly America-centered issues. I even thought the Canadian YouTubers I watched were American due to how well-versed they were in American history and politics.
But, as Americans living and breathing in the US of A, how do you feel about these people? Do you think their criticisms have merit even if they only look at America from an outsider's perspective?
For me personally, if someone from another country did the same to mine, I wouldn't mind. If anything, listening to a foreigner's perspective on my country's issues is beneficial since these people aren't clouded by the cultural biases formed by locals growing up in their own country. After all, it's natural that you tend to be more defensive toward your own country's problems, especially if you live under authoritarian governments that do their best to hide their shitty practices from you.
That said, I do think some of these critiques become so overblown that they end up becoming annoying. I think what some of these YouTubers fail to do sometimes is that they don't take into account the complex cultural differences and nuances that each country has and just apply their cultural viewpoints and assume Americans will follow them. Every time someone says, "God, why can't America just do this, are they stupid!?" they often treat Americans as an extension of their own country's citizens, rather than a separate nation with different histories, beliefs, etc.
What annoys me as well is that some of these people are so good at America-grifting but get uber-defensive when the opposite is being done, i.e., when an American criticizes their nation, often.
At the end of the day though, I want to be nice and say most of these YouTubers, TikTokers, etc. do have America's best interest in mind. Ironically, many of them are big Americophiles considering how much they love consuming from the Hollywood juggernaut. But, if you want to help another country, try to offer solutions that best fit the cultural and societal norms of that country, and be open to your own country's faults as well. We are all humans here, trying to help each other out.
So yeah, as Americans, how do you feel about these people? Do you think their criticisms have merit even if they only look at America from an outsider's perspective?

The sun-dappled forest exuded a serene yet peaceful tranquility, remaining undisturbed from common occurrences. Trees motionless stood unperturbed by the elements of the weather. Gentle rivers meandered, carrying tiny fish and pebbles in their currents. Birds serenaded each other from atop their nests, singing songs to their young and to their lovers.
The peaceful landscape remained undisturbed until a deafening roar suddenly shattered the tranquility. The powerful eruption shook the trees, rippled the waters, and startled flocks of birds into a panicked flight. Contrary to the ominous disruption, the source of the booming sound was not from a fearsome predator that roamed the land nor a monstrous creature that invoked fear and terror to the wildlife, but rather a small, orange-haired girl with horns as long as her arms, tipsy as she walked down through the woods with a gourd in hand and chains dragging from behind. The roar itself wasn’t even a roar, but an alcohol-breath burp right after she took a swig from her gourd.
“Ah, nothing says it like strolling around the forest with sake in hand.” She said to herself. “With wind in my face, grass beneath my feet, and basking in the warmth of that big ball of fire up in the blue sky.”
She spread her arms out like a bird ready to take flight. “The surface is great! It’s nothing like the dull dark depths of the Former Capital, I don’t know what everyone was thinking telling me coming up here was a bad idea. It’s so much fun! Ahahaha~”
As she ventured deeper into the forest, her laughter rang out boisterously, reminiscent of a foolish, drunken man stumbling from a bar or an overjoyed child finding amusement in the simplest things. However, this mirth gradually subsided, dwindling to mere chuckles before fading to complete silence as she approached a large, strangely-shaped tree with a trunk that resembled a natural seat. Settling down, her expression shifted to one of boredom. A long sigh escaped her lips, and she blinked a couple times facing towards the ground.
After a few minutes of sobering up, she spoke, “Who am I kidding? The surface sucks. None of the animals pose a challenge, the human villagers don’t show fear since they don’t recognize what I am, and the youkai don’t take me seriously. Us oni haven’t been gone that long, so why aren’t we threatening?”
She picked up a nearby rock and threw it a good distance away from her. The rock struck a tree, ripping through its bark and left behind a hand-sized wound for the innocent timber.
“Not like I can go back down and admit to everyone I was wrong. I’d be a coward. No oni of any stature would dare return weak.”
A brief moment of silence, as though she expected a response. But no, it was quiet and lonesome.
“Sigh…I wish I had someone to talk to at the very least. If only I knew how to contact Yukari.” She slumped further down the tree’s stump, filled with a hint of sorrow beneath her aloof demeanor.
That’s when she heard something close by. She raised her head and looked towards the direction of the sound from behind the tree, a voice being that of a young girl with some gruffness in her tone.
“Haven’t checked here yet, hopefully there’s something roaming here. Maybe I’ll find a new insect to catch along the way. Wouldn’t it be nice to have another bug for our collection Mimi?”
The figure soon walked around the tree and revealed herself to the oni. It was a girl with long black messy hair, with a face that had a couple bandages, and a red-black outfit that resembled more like boy’s clothing than a girl’s. In her hand was a small stuffed shrine maiden doll. The two stared at one another blankly with surprised faces, but neither one spoke for what felt like ages.
“Who are you?” The tomboyish girl asked. The other felt nervous to speak suddenly, she didn’t expect to encounter anyone far deep in the woods. Her mind raced with a million options, and she settled with one.
“Well well well, if it isn’t a naive innocent human, coming all the way to my domain!” She said, standing upright with a dominant nature. “To think someone as brave as you dare come face-to-face with an oni such as myself! I commend you, but don’t think you can leave now.” She said, showing her teeth in order to be threatening.
“An oni?” The girl asked. “You mean the youkai from the stories I’ve been told?”
“Why yes. A member of a powerful race that humans feared for centuries. With our tremendous strength and staggering height, we are superior to you in every way. You have every right to be afraid.”
She expected her to be trembling, shaken down to her shoes. Yet she wasn’t, she simply stood in front of her, looking down a little.
“Aren’t you…a little short to be an oni?”
All that dominating confidence swayed from that statement, a red blush formed on her face to show.
“T-That’s not important. What is important is that you need to fear me.”
“Why?”
“W-Why? She’s asking why?” She thought. “How do I respond to that? Dammit, why can’t people just be scared for no reason?”
She wondered how to get her to fear her, when a growl from her stomach interrupted her thoughts.
“Oh, are you hungry? I brought a couple of onigiris with me; you can have one if you want.” The other girl offered, pulling out a fresh triangular ball of rice in front of the oni.
She looked at the food presented, her mouth watering with hunger. She at first wanted to refuse, denying herself the pleasure of food she did not earn. But her stomach redetermined her values so she hastily took the onigiri and shoved it in her mouth without a second thought. The taste of something that wasn’t stale or raw filled her tongue with pleasure, allowing something other than alcoholic intoxication.
“You better?” The tomboyish girl asked.
“Yeah. Much better.” She said, relieved she no longer felt empty as she patted her tummy.
“So, what’s your name?”
“My name? It’s uh…Suika.” Suika said.
“Cool. My name’s Minako. And this lil maiden right here is Mimi.” Minako held up the shrine maiden doll up closer so Suika could see. She thought it was cute, yet contrasting to Minako’s rougher appearance.
“Hm…Well then, I ask again: What’s a human like you doing all the way out here in the woods?” Suika asked.
“Easy, I’m looking for something big to fight. My mom told me the best way to get stronger is by taking down something bigger than you, so I figured I try my luck around here. Have you seen any big creatures nearby?”
“Something to fight you say? Well, I think I fit that description. I don’t look like it, but I’ve won more fights than the number of times you’ve eaten rice.” Suika boasted, attempting to taunt Minako. The latter however let out a short laugh.
“Yeah, sorry Suika, I said I’m looking for something big, tall, tremendous in stature.” She raised her arms up wide to further show what she meant.
“H-hey, I can be big if I want!” Suika expressed her annoyance at the girl’s lack of fright. She could easily grow twice her size and pick her up like how she picks up her own doll. But she didn’t feel like wanting to harm her; instead another idea came to mind.
“Actually, I think I know one that’s close.”
Soon after, Suika led Minako to an open part of the woods belonging to a creature she knew of. There they both witnessed a large bear, minding itself to a berry bush. The bear was quite large, massive compared to most bears that roamed Gensokyo. Though gentle in the way it nibbled on the bush of berries, its hulking body made it appear to be fearsome.
“Okay, you see that bear there?” Suika pointed while she and Minako hid behind the trees. “You think you can handle 'em?”
“I-I’m not sure. I never fought a bear before.” Minako said with slight anxiety.
“Relax, if anything goes wrong I’ll pull you out, trust me, I’m an oni, we’re always honest.”
“If you say so.” Minako said, placing her Mimi doll safely beside the tree, telling it to stay put. She then began to approach the bear slowly, creeping towards it. Suika meanwhile laughed to herself, thinking of what she expected the outcome to be.
“Hehe, she probably has no idea how dangerous bears really are. All it’ll take is one roar and she’ll be cowering beneath, then I’ll swoop in, give the bear a one-two, and have her honor me as her superior.”
The bear quickly took notice of Minako’s approach. It rose up on its back legs, growling loudly as it made its warning clear to the girl, before moving to strike with its massive paws. Minako however, did not cower, nor scream with fear like Suika expected; rather she took a firm stance, clenched her fist, and jump-spun-uppercutted the bear by the chin, hitting so hard the bear flew up by a couple meters, and crashed back down the ground out cold.
Suika was stunned, her eyes wide as dinner plates and her mouth slightly open from what she witnessed.
“D…Did…you just…uppercut a bear!?” Suika asked, seeing Minako return and pick back up her doll.
“I did. Didn’t expect the bear to go down so easily.” Minako said.
“But I thought you said you never fought a bear before!”
“I haven’t. Though, I do have experience fighting wolves. And Kappa. And Tengu. And at least 20 different species of youkai. Though my mom has fought much more threatening creatures…Oh, that reminds me, I need to head home soon for dinner, it’s starting to get late!”
Minako began to float up from the ground, an act that would make Suika even more surprised than ever. What she thought was a normal adventurous girl turned out to be a human who exceeded all expectations. Meeting such a person presenting such strength made her feel not as lonely as she did earlier.
“Wait!” She called out before Minako could take off. Minako looked over at Suika with a curious glance.
“Um…If you want, I know some other areas with creatures as strong as the bear. If you come visit again I can show you where they are.”
Minako stayed silent for a second, “...Sure, I like that actually. I’ll be sure to return tomorrow.”
And like that she left, and Suika watched her fly off east, now with a smile she didn’t have before.
The next day Minako came as she said she would, and Suika showed her where they could find more creatures to fight. Once again Minako proved to be quite strong and took down the creature with ease, before heading home that same evening. Overtime Minako came to visit Suika to find more beings to fight; sometimes it was a big beast, other times a mischievous youkai, and oftentimes a young fairy of ice trying to prove itself over and over.
Not all days consisted of finding something to fight. On certain occasions the two would go explore, find places they have yet to discover. Other days they would catch insects, something Minako herself was fond of and gladly showed Suika how to do herself. On a particular day, Suika let Minako try sake for the first time; long story short it did not sit well with her. Regardless, they became close friends.
On a certain day, when the sky was a nice evening orange, the two sat by the edge of the forest, talking to one another about their concerns, their worries. Suika told Minako about how she came from the underworld after a bold claim that she could make everyone recall the legacy the oni race left behind, only to come up short and be alone. Mianko told Suika about her mother, and how strict she could be with her training and who she’s allowed to socialize with, resulting in her not having as many friends as she hoped. Her closest friend for the longest time was her doll Mimi, who she always took with her whenever she left the house for the day, because Mimi always kept her company. They realized they have more in common than they first thought.
Eventually like all days, their time to hang out came to an end, and Minako had to return home. She got up and was set to leave again, when she decided on something she hadn’t done before. She turned to Suika, handing her her Mimi doll.
“Eh? You’re giving this to me?” Suika asked. “But this is your precious doll, are you sure?”
“Of course I’m sure. Mimi always kept me company, now it’s her turn to keep you company.” Minako said.
Suika appreciated the act. She looked at the little shrine maiden doll, looking at its dotted eyes and sewed-on smile. A small tear formed in her eye, one she wiped away quickly and returned a thankful smile to her friend.

Python is a commonly used programming language for a variety of purposes. It was created with the intention of being a general-purpose language that could be used for almost anything. More importantly, this language was created to simplify the coding syntax. Whereas many other languages at the time had, and still have, a very complex syntax that is difficult to learn. That’s why Python’s popularity significantly increased over the years.

According to the Stack Overflow 2022 Developer Survey, 48.07% of developers prefer using Python over other programming languages.

The Python programming language is used in varied programs and automated tasks. With this language, developing websites, software, and task automation can be done easily which many businesses prefer. The feasibility of Python comes because of its various tools and frameworks that help developers achieve their goals with fewer lines of code. Django is one such framework that supports rapid web development and design.

As per Stack Overflow 2022 Developer Survey, Django is preferred by 14.65% of developers as a flexible web framework of Python.

This fast, secure, and versatile framework provides adequate support to Python, enhancing its usability. Therefore, let’s delve deeper into understanding the major reasons why Python and Django became as popular as it is today. Along with that, let’s also evaluate why you should hire efficient Python developers and best django developers for your business.

Reasons why Python is so popular:

Python’s simple syntax was designed to make coding accessible to everybody. It is now utilized in nearly every aspect of software development, from automation scripts to full-fledged software such as websites and games.

According to the TIOBE Index, Python has achieved a rating of 12.20%, ranking as the top programming language of 2022. The PYPL PopularitY of Programming Language Index also indicates Python as the topmost programming language.

There’s no denying the popularity of Python. The current trends indicate that this language is likely to grow in demand in the upcoming years. Now, let’s break down the top reasons why Python is so popular.

1. Easy To Learn

Python is one of the programming languages that are fairly easy to learn. For newcomers and beginners, this language is relatively simple to use and understand. Python is one of the most accessible programming languages since it has a simple syntax and is not overly technical, allowing natural language to take center stage. That’s why it provides an easier learning curve for beginners.
Because of the nature of Python, most developers prefer using it, making it easier for businesses to hire Python developers for their business growth.
One of the significant aspects of Python is that it is free to use and is supported by a large ecosystem of libraries and packages. It is a major reason behind the increasing popularity of this open-source programming language.
Most importantly, Python is an interpreted language and can be readily experimented with, by simply modifying the code base. This further elevates the usage of this programming language, making it even more popular among all types of developers.

2. Libraries And Frameworks

A significant advantage that comes along with Python is its free libraries and frameworks. A programming language library is a module that includes pre-written code that allows the user to perform several actions with the same functionality.
Python includes libraries that save developers time by eliminating the need to start from scratch. Moreover, Python’s community provides developers with the ability to save time and effort on every development cycle.
AI and machine learning algorithms can be implemented more readily with the help of these libraries. Data analysis, deep learning, machine learning, computer vision, and advanced computing can all benefit from these libraries. This allows for faster product development because developers can now handle complicated problems without having to rewrite code lines.
Python is also equipped with several core frameworks such as Django. Web2Py, Flask, Bottle, CherryPy. Frameworks are the collection of modules or packages used for writing web applications. It can be used to automate the implementation process making it easier for the overall development process. Due to this, m

3. Flexibility

Python is one of the most relevant and versatile programming languages to exist. It is used by many IT giants like Google, Facebook, and Netflix. Because of its flexible nature, it can be combined with other languages to reach the required result. It provides the developer with the choice of using Object-Oriented Programming (OOPs) or scripting.
An expert developer can build numerous things using this programming language. This kind of freedom and flexibility is not available in other programming languages as it is with Python, making it highly popular.
A business can benefit from implementing a language like Python since it is efficient, reliable, and faster than other programming languages. It can be used in almost any product with reduced chances of any issue or performance loss. This programming language also does not necessitate recompilation of the source code, making the findings easier to view.
It provides a safe environment for developers and decreases the likelihood of errors due to its versatility. Therefore, hiring expert Python developers from a company like AIMLEAP is recommended if a business wants to experience the full potential of this language.

4. Automation Capabilities

Python is also the best performance booster for software testing automation. Writing codes for automation tools takes a fraction of the time and requires a little number of lines.
Its library of plugins has further aided this language to become an automation standard in the industry. Even when programmers are using other languages, they would utilize Python when crafting automation scripts.

5. Active Community Support

Python has a large number of active programming communities all over the world. People can discuss their code issues with one another, and other programmers can offer solutions. This language was created 30 years ago which has provided it with the scope of evolving into a community of beginner to experienced developers.
Such communities provide a great deal of assistance to programmers as they work on new applications. They can talk about coding problems with other members of the community and come up with effective solutions. With such a supportive community, developers can execute simple to complex tasks with ease.

6. Corporate Support

When a company sponsors a programming language, it expands more quickly. For example, Facebook supports PHP, and Python; Microsoft supports Visual Basic and C#. Facebook, Amazon Web Services, and, most notably, Google all support the Python programming language. This has led to the incredible popularity of Python as a programming language over the years.
Google began using Python in 2006 and has subsequently utilized it in a variety of applications and platforms. In the developer world, the list of support tools and documentation for the Python language continues to grow.

Around 48.07% of developers around the world prefer using Python for their programming tasks, making it the top-most used language.

This indicates the growth and further increase in its popularity in the upcoming years.

7. Versatility

This general-purpose programming language is not only easy to learn but is efficient, reliable, and provides adequate speed. Python can be utilized in almost any environment, and regardless of the platform on which it is employed, there will be no performance loss. Another advantage of the Python language is its adaptability. It can be utilized in a wide range of situations, including mobile apps, desktop apps, web development, and hardware programming, among others.
Python’s adaptability makes it more appealing to use because of its wide range of applications. Its versatile nature allows Python to be readily used in the Internet of Things (IoT) to develop a wide range of devices that can be controlled with this language and IoT libraries. Opting for Python provides businesses with the added boost of seamless development. Choose top Python developers from AIMLEAP to enhance your business development.

8. Machine Learning & Data Science

After R, Python is the second most widely used language for data science and analytics. The programming language is used to fuel a large number of data processing workloads in the company. Because of its various applications, including the simplicity of analyzing and arranging usable data, the majority of research and development is done in Python.
Not only that but hundreds of Python modules, such as TensorFlow for neural networks and OpenCV for computer vision, are utilized in thousands of machine learning projects every day. The data packages available with Python have further made it easier to handle complex Machine Learning and Data Science projects easily, resulting in its immense popularity.

How did Django become an extremely popular framework?

In 2022, there are more than 7000 Django users around the world and the number is predicted to keep on increasing.

This open-source framework of Python gained rapid popularity because of its versatile, fast, and secure usage. Django is a high-level web framework that supports Python, resulting in fast web development and design. Its use can be observed in many tech companies since it provides a feasible process of development, adding to its popularity. Therefore, let’s delve in detail into the top reasons that have resulted in its significant growth and demand.

1. Based On Python

One of the foremost reasons behind this framework’s popularity is that it is built with Python. Python is one of the most popular languages in the world so there is always a demand for Django as a framework. It becomes significantly easier for a developer to learn Django who understands the basics of Python. Moreover, this framework is easy to use and helps developers execute diverse tasks at a fast pace. Thus, get Django development services from the best Django developers to ensure the required result.

2. Community Support

It is often remarked that one of the best elements of the Python world is the community, and this is even more true in the Django world. Most open-source projects have a great community of users and backers, which is true for Django. Due to this, a massive amount of resources are readily available for developers. From tutorial videos and articles to workshops, the vast community provides a wide range of support, leading to this framework’s popularity.
The Django Software Foundation, or DSF, is in charge of Django. Every Django-related event has a code of conduct. Accordingly, a developer gets proper support when looking out how to solve any issue. Recruit the best Django developers from AIMLEAP to elevate a business’s development process.

3. SEO Friendly

The Django framework for Python encourages the use of human-readable website URLs, which is beneficial to search engines. Its advantage can be understood not only from the standpoint of the user but also because search engines use the keywords in the URL when ranking sites. Therefore, when a business opts for Django development services, it can hire Django developers who can perform cross-purpose jobs of both development and optimization with ease.

4. Highly Scalable

Scalability is one of the core factors that elevate smooth development, resulting in its immense popularity. Since the Django framework is highly scalable, it makes it easier for developing a wide range of web apps. Django is, at its core, a collection of pre-wired and ready-to-use components. Now that these components are decoupled, or independent of one another, they may be unplugged and replaced as a business grows and requires more specialized solutions. Outsource the best Django developers for versatile Django development services for efficient development.

5. Highly Portable

Django, like Python, operates on almost any platform, including Mac, PC, and Linux. As a result, no development or production environment is left without assistance. On top of that, Django also includes ORM (object-relational mapper). It is a layer between the developer and the database that makes it possible to move projects between databases by merely changing a line of code. Hire a Django programmer from a reliable company like AIMLEAP to access effortless Django development services. With the best Django developers onboard, an organization can smoothly develop and design various web applications to meet its business objective.

6. Highly Secure

One of the highest selling points of the Django framework is that it is highly secure. The best Django developers across the globe prefer this framework the most because of this very reason. By default, Django guards against a slew of frequent security blunders and provides secure cookie support.
To begin, Django camouflages or hides the site’s source code from direct Internet inspection by dynamically producing web pages and transmitting information to web browsers via templates. It has strong encryption packages and protects against common attacks like Clickjacking and XSS attacks. When a business selects Django development services, they are completely able to use the framework’s advantages for their benefit.

7. Excellent Documentation

This web framework possesses a higher standard of documentation for open-source projects which has only gotten better with time. It provides excellent functionality for documentation which makes collaboration easier between teams working on Django. It was one of the first frameworks to have an alphabetical list of modules and all the methods and attributes. Although this system has now been introduced to other frameworks, Django sets the finest example for accessible documentation. Work with the best Django developers in the industry by choosing affordable Django development services from AIMLEAP.

Conclusion:

Python programming language is one of the most accessible programming languages available. It is not complicated, has a simplified syntax, and helps in easy code writing that can be executed much faster as compared to other programming languages. This has led to the significant popularity of this programming language over the years. Most businesses look for developers skilled in the Python language for its numerous advantages. It has a vast category of libraries and frameworks, a supportive community, and automation capability. The increasing rise in its demand is because of its flexible and versatile nature that helps immensely aid businesses in development.
Similarly, like Python, its web framework known as Django is extremely popular. This framework brings a lot of things to the table such as it is secure, scalable, as well as SEO friendly. Thus, for efficient development, hire the best Django developers from AIMLEAP and secure the pre-eminent Django development services.

hello all! this is my first reddit post so i am a bit nervous but would love to hear some advice from people who graduated and had an unconventional post-graduate experience (not going to grad school or getting a job/internship immediately and taking a gap year abroad). i am a 22 year old muslim woman and recently graduated with two STEM degrees after 5 years in university, i also served on my university's NSBE board, studied abroad, and did an internship during my time in university. i spent the last 2 years of my high school career taking college courses + engaging in numerous extracurriculars, so i have been working really hard the last 7 years of my life. i am also the eldest daughter of my immigrant family and have had a very difficult family life, so all of this combined over the last 7 years has significantly deteriorated my physical and mental health. now that im graduated, i don’t know what to do with myself. i don’t have a job or internship lined up, and i am so ridiculously burnt out and exhausted. i feel so much pressure to secure a job/internship, go get my masters, or do something else that’s worthwhile. there's so much people are telling me that i can and should be doing right now. however, all i want to do is just go abroad for a year and focus on my physical and mental health as it’s in shambles and because my burn out is so intense. i don't want to just rush into a job i hate or a masters program im unsure of, especially in this economy. in my immigrant community/culture though, gap years aren’t really seen and understood. i worry that taking a year off will really jeopardize my career and my life’s trajectory, however, my body really is exhausted and i know in my heart that i need and deserve a break.redditers, has anyone dealt with this? ive been struggling as i feel like a failure and like im behind my friends/peers as i dont have a job/internship/masters or im not like getting married or moving onward w my life (as a muslim woman looool lots of my age mates have been getting married) or taking the conventional path society/community/family are telling me to take. my entire life there’s been so much pressure on me to succeed + excel, and i have always been a gifted child and an overachiever, so this burnout and confusion is very nerve wracking, unfamiliar, and anxiety inducing. to anyone who’s taken a gap year and gone abroad to find themselves/rest/rejuvenate and gain some clarity postgrad, did it benefit you? did you regret taking one, and for the others, do you regret not taking that time to rest? how was it like coming back and re-establishing yourself and kickstarting your career after your gap year? id love to hear some insight. im also worried about how ill fund my gap year and myself while im abroad. please give any insight, i would really appreciate it!!

Hi everyone. I'm just trying to make a friend, but trying to find people who are exactly like me is very hard. I am different from most "normal" people, and not in a good way. I have a lot of flaws. But I am not looking for someone to accept me. I am looking for someone who is just like me. So that there is nothing that needs tolerating or accepting at each other. Is it possible to find such a person? I don't know, but I know the only way I might is if I am an open book from the beginning. So here I am, and here is my story.
I am an autistic person, been diagnosed since I was a kid. Unfortunately I never got any help, support, or anyone who could understand me. I live in Eastern Europe. Not the best environment for autistic people, or for anyone too different really, especially when I was a child. Everyone I've ever met treated me like a weirdo. But from their perspective I really was one, not being sufficiently like everyone else.
My childhood has been pretty abusive. As a kid, after my parents noticed many times that I act and react in ways different from other people, they took me to a psychologist. I was diagnosed with autism, but that didn't change anything. Like most parents in Eastern Europe, especially back then, my parents had traditional mindsets. In their mind any deviancy, anything that made me different, could be fixed with sufficient discipline. It was common for my father to beat me, a few times to the point of drawing blood. Eventually my parents divorced, but the effects still linger. I am fearful, paranoiac and afraid to be truthful in real life.
For most of my life I didn't have any friends, only a very few people I could say came somewhat close that came and went. I was just too different. I didn't share any "normal" interests, and the way I behaved was too "unnatural". Unsurprisingly I never had a romantic partner either.
My biggest interest by far is video games. Escapism. Throughout my life they saved me, allowed me to lose myself into those fake worlds and forget the real world. But naturally, what I wanted the most became what my parents took away the most often, whenever I didn't act sufficiently normal. But this only served to increase my longing. I became obsessed with games, spending every tiny bit of free time when I wasn't grounded in front of my PC. It is something that carries on to this day. Even now I spend literally all day at my PC, browsing or gaming. To the point that I eliminated anything except sleeping and eating from my schedule just to stay at my PC more. My second interest is learning new things, which I also do at my PC.
I have a huge number of flaws originating from the combination of my upbringing and autism. I'm not talking about autistic traits, for those are only flaws from the eyes of regular people. I have a huge number of genuine flaws and I do not even want to fix them, even as I know this makes it worse - knowing exactly what are the flaws but having no intention to.
I isolate myself from others, knowing I am too different. But I want to find someone who is like me. Who has the same story, who has the same mindset, possibly the same flaws. If you are like me, I would love to talk more in private.

Good morning from England!
To preface I write this as a 30F, no spring chicken and very recently gave myself a huge confidence boost discovering this label. Also this post will be rather ramble-y, sorry!
This post is a description of my own experiences growing up, feeling alienated and unable to talk about my own dating experiences for fear of the same responses I have been given time and time again. I wanted to write something out, because if this resonates with even a single person and helps them feel a little more "normal" then I feel it's done its job.
Firstly, you AREN'T weird, your dating style and relationship style is VALID. Maybe, like me, this is the first time you've thought this in your whole dating life.
I know this may sound basic, but this is exactly how I felt stumbling onto the "demi" term. A sudden switch in my mind has been flipped and I realize I can stop pretending that "the next guy" will be the one I want to suddenly hold hands with, or kiss, or jump into bed with. That I just haven't found someone that has the perfect look or vibe for me to want to dive on. That my fear after the third date if I am not physical with them it just wasn't meant to be and I should either force it and see, or drop it there and then. That flirting is the biggest turn off for me and that's ok! No-one else I spoke could understand why and thought it was cute, so I just stopped talking about it. My friends constantly would advise me to just keep pushing. That I was just too picky. That I need to just settle already and give guys a chance. I love them but lord, it felt so tiring.
So lets go back, throughout the years. I was brought up in a small town. A lot of close minded people, labels weren't a thing. Hell, we had never heard of autism, or spectrums, it was just "weird." Me and my friends all had a typical upbringing, one day you'll get married and buy a house and have kids. Thats the way of the world! (Not for me, never wanted kids and still don't!)
I have had... a handful of relationships. Always with people I knew beforehand over time. I would gain a crush, we would become a thing, and as soon as things got more physical I would be very suddenly repulsed by them and end it. I knew this was toxic behaviour and hated myself for it but just could NOT get past that boundary. Even when I forced myself past those boundaries, it was never enjoyable. I was never comfortable. Albeit this is also all before I turned about 25? before pandemic years, I was an overweight, unconfident gamer girl. You won't believe how many times my family (and I) have joked about sending me off to First Dates because I've really just never been interested much in finding a partner.
Friends would discuss their crushes, who they thought was hot, who they'd bang. For me, if I could name celebrities.. it was always a character they played, not them themselves. It was book characters or game characters who we had time to watch develop their personality - of course I'd never admit most of my crushes were fictional. Even now, as a 30 year old, friends will show me pictures of band members or celebs or men they think I would be good dating.. and I'd always shy away. Or think, yeah, they're technically attractive? I am not attracted myself... how can I be? I don't know these people. I don't get the sentiment of them being "hot" even if topless or posed. But I'd just nod and agree because I guess yeah, they're techincally good looking.
I pondered the idea if I was asexual, but I always knew that didn't fit.
I found major confidence moving to the city. Meeting friends who are confident in themselves, who don't judge but listen. I lost a tonne of weight, got a job I love, was very happy and had plenty going on. But still I wanted to date. But every time I tried it was disastrous, tedious and exhausting.
Online dating: I will swipe on 99.9 percent of guys, and swipe right on the VERY few that I could see were happy. I didn't swiped because"damn they're hot" but I'd think "yeah, they look like they take care of themselves and are happy, nice dress sense. Not dead in the eyes. Have friends and go outside." but on top of that their profile HAD to resonate with me. Then we would meet and I'd usually come away not wanting to see them again, always expecting that you need the date to feel atleast positive at the end. But I just... never had that. They were fine. They were meh. I could never see them again and it's no skin off my back. Everyone would tell me "you just need to give them more time" which is technically true. But the thought of "three dates and you'll absolutely know" always plagued my mind. After the first to date they'd become flirty. I'd say I need to take it slow, but usually the cute emojiis, the hand holding on the second date and pressure to be more physical would all be too much and I'd just shut it down. I hated that I felt like this every damn time.
Now, I realise, I have a label that resonates and people who are the same minded! I think. I have no idea how much this'll actually help going forward, but it makes it a lot easier to communicate that I need FRIENDSHIP first. I need time, and if they can't handle that then there's no point trying. I'd rather remain single for my days than be with someone who doesn't understand.
And guess what I now tell myself? that's ok! You don't need to feel wrong anymore. Like I will suddenly become attracted when the right person comes along. Like you just need to force through or take up that random guys offer that flirted on the street. Like I need to be flattered when someone compliments me.
I can make it about getting to know eachother. It's more about time, boundaries, communication and patience. A deep dive into knowing eachother before snuggling up.
I find myself more excited knowing I now don't have to rush, and can spend time taking it easy. Maybe go to more meetups rather than dating apps, and just keep enjoying life.
I can say I recently moved to a smaller town again thinking maybe I just need to find somewhere to settle. But being back here makes me feel like I have regressed back and I once again have itchy feet to move back to a city. However it has also caused me to do more soul searching, eventually discovering this term and suddenly, for the first time in 15-ish years.. I feel comfortable with myself. Like finding the last missing piece to the jigsaw of my brain.
Stay safe and happy, beautiful people :) My ramble is over, but if you did read it, thanks for reading!

First night in Paris with my wife, a baby, and a toddler. Landed at CDG around 5:40 walked through customs which took less than 10 mins. Followed the line for taxi and 1 hour and 10 mins later we arrived in the 15th, gave the taxi driver 70E. We got situated in our Airbnb, very French apartment, windows had no curtains and creaky hardwood floors.
We got ready and it was nearly 8pm and the sun was still out. We walked down the street to find a place to eat, we saw a roundabout with 3 bistros and settled with one. Sat down and 10 mins later they took our order, they had one server that spoke English. We had French onion soup, escargot, steak, veal risotto, and kids chicken w/ frites. Everything came out in 10 mins which was crazy fast. All the food was good but I suspect it was because we were hungry from traveling all day. Only observation was my son kept asking 'what's that smell' and being a bistro with outdoor seating it was people smoking of course.
We left and walked towards the Eiffel Tower which was about 30 min walk but we had views of it because we walked along the river. We got there and I noticed there were gates now, I don't remember seeing those when I was there years ago. But they have a metal detector and bag check to go inside. We went in and waited for the light show. We found a nice bench and took in the view. It was pretty nice to be with the family and enjoying the view. The light show was nice and we left and tried to cab back home, it was 11pm by now. All the cabs were asking for 40e for a 1 mile ride. So we tried to take the bus and the wait time kept changing and went from 10 to 25 mins. We ended up walking back through the park and it felt completely safe with 2 kids past 11pm.
Nothing else to add but Paris felt pretty safe, did see signs for pickpockets while leaving the Eiffel Tower. There were a lot of people selling statues for 1e or had iPad to take your pics. We just walked by them.

Looking for people's opinions on my Rowan "turbo" list: https://www.archidekt.com/decks/5948101/cedh_rowan_selfpain
This is the first deck im trying to power up to cEDH levels. My playgroup is playing alot of off-meta commanders and there's going to be a cEDH tourny in our local gamestore soon, my goal is to make the deck stronger and faster if possible while making it viable to compete with strong decks.
The deck usually wins by turboing out rowan + an x cost spell , by going infinite with some combo lines or ad naus/necro/abyss draw. Ive played around 25 games with the deck and ive won around 1/4th of the games in my group while them being a mostly blue centered pod.
I don't have a budget and the cards i have on "Sideboard" is cards im considering putting in, while cards in "Maybeboard" are cards i tried or taken out due to them not being good enough.
What would you guys add/remove from the list? And why?

I’m going to be honest I think a good chunk of these posts are people letting other peoples pets into their home and trapping them there or having pets approach them in the street and bringing them home.
I totally get when you find a kitten in an engine or a dumpster or a stray approaches you in the street
Or if it’s an alternative, healthier looking cat and you’ve posted about them for 4 weeks, checked for microchips asked neighbours & local vets then fair enough.
But when a very well looked after cat shows up in your home and you instantly say CDS you COULD but not always be stealing someone’s beloved cat. And not all cats are loyal some will leave and never look back but there could be a devastated owner somewhere.
My neighbours cat would walk in here like he owns the place and as much as I love him always guide him out which his owner is very grateful for. Also I personally think it’s wrong to ever feed another persons cat 1. Cats will go where there is food not always because they like someone 2. You don’t know if they have any dietary requirements/allergies etc and it’s also a form of coercion again IMO of course.
I just think a lot of these cases on here look way too healthy to be strays if I was a mod I’d ensure every post was prefaced with something along the lines of we’ve posted for 4 weeks, checked with vets , scanned for chips etc but some of you’s are finding cats on day 1 and have them fully moved in by day 2 🤷‍♀️

This Is my first ever reddit post, and maybe my only one. I 25/M and my Girlfriend 24/F have been together for 6 years and living together for about 3 or 4. At thr beginning it was tough hut we managed to keep it pretty ok. At the end of 2019 she decided to go to college and get a Degree, and I supported her as best as I could. She even got a part time job and helped out with the finances, I handling most of them. After a year or two there's been a steady decline in my metal health due to my previous job being overly toxic and physically challenging, I wasn't sleeping right, we were told we were the best team and then not a day later that our boss wanted to fire us all and just replace us, this was a constant occurance. My mental health decline and I started stress therapy and such, with my girlfriends help. That started around 2020, and we were happy. Soon not long after she got the part time job, my girlfriend quit it due to the toxic environment there, it was pretty much a waitressing job and they paid her minimum tip wage. I was ok with it, as she was having anxiety attacks and such about it. I would do my best from here to support her, and she decided she would focus on school more and I again was ok with it, I was making enough money and finances were not a big issue in the house, and when she got her refunds from school she would help out here and there. Afterwards, I started noticing that we were both slacking in chores at home and we needed to keep the place clean so our Landlord, who has been a very kind woman, but a little strict on cleanliness, would not evict us, even though she hasn't done an inspection herself since the very beginning. I talk to my girlfriend and we tried to work out how to get stuff done, and let me preface this that by no means did I want her to do all the work, but she was home more and I asked if she could atleaat handle the dishes and I handle pickup up any trash around the house. And this worked for about a month. I still ended up doing the dishes here and there, but I then began to do them more frequently. To avoid doing dishes though, she would want to purchase plastic ware, which is fine and ever now and then we did but dishes still would begin to pile up. We'll because of my decline mental health I began to slack, and it came to a head last year in 2023, when I had such a bad panic attack, that I thought I was having a heart attack, I had chest pains for 4 hours and had to go to the hospital. I was fine and only spent 3 hours there. I had thoughts of suicide and many other mental problems and I couldn't take the job anymore. I was searching and searching and thanks to a friend I got a much better job with pay and better benefits. I even started seeing a psychiatrist and started back on ADHD medication, and all this time I had the support of my girlfriend but at home... nothing would get done. When I got home, she would usually be on the couch, on TikTok or Facebook. I started having to do more and more stuff at home while also working, and if I asked her "Hey can you handle these few things for the house while I'm at work since your home with no classes today?" I would come home to her still being on the couch, and if I sighed and let it be and I started doing the chore I had asked her to do, she would get upset with me. She kept telling me that she doesn't know why she doesn't do anything, how she has bad anxiety, and it is bad, how she's depressed and she can't afford to go to her therapist, and I've offered to pay for her stuff when I can but she doesn't make an appointment. I try my best to endure and let her rest, I tried talking to her, and yes we have had fights aswell, because I feel at this point and time that I'm the only one doing anything to take care of the house, and when I talk to her about it she apologizes constantly and says she will do better, and then I end up feeling like a huge asshole if we had fought, and it wouldn't do anything, she would be back on her phone the next day, and sometimes when I got home she would be just starting the chore... and then give up 30 mins in having to always take a break and never finish. Don't get me wrong, there were times when she did complete the chore, or she did a good bit and I would take over to be fair to her. It's not that I want her to do everything, I have my problems, I leave stuff out to, and wait last minute to clean up my trash, but I atleast clean it up. She will eat and then leave a dish where it was until I got home the next day and picked it up to put into the dishes myself. When I come home she's always just there on the couch, and she would procratsinate doing her homework too. An example would be she would wait until the night it's due, panic around 8pm, it being due either tomorrow morning or at 11:59 that night. I would calm her, but in my stupidity after multiple times, I have chastised her about constantly doing this to herself. Well she graduated Cum Laude recently, so she did good enough and kept her grades up. And now we come to recently. Starting in the beginning of May 2024, I woke up one morning to feel, indifferent. I didnt feel anything. And I knew it was a depression episode. That same week she graduated and I bought a second vehicle, which we are having seperate issues with the previous owner about, kinda as a gift but also because she had been telling me she feels trapped due to her not having a vehicle and having to rely on people for rides, mainly her dad, a completely different problem, not a bad guy, but not the best guy either. I didn't want her to feel trapped. We bought the vehicle and right now we can't really drive it due to needing to get the title so we can get the tag. And whenever I get a call from the previous owner or find out a single thing about the jeep she starts panicking, freaking out and I would calm her but... I also wouldn't sometimes because most of the time the problem is very trivial, like we found out there was a lien, but the lien was from when the previous owner had bought the jeep from a friend, so it was a personal lean and she had proof she had paid it off and just never had the title fixed. But during this time, my depression got worse, and worse, and worse. When I would come home, I couldn't feel anything. There was one day on my way home that as I was driving in silence, my eyes began to slowly close, like I was a little sleepy but I wasn't trying to sleep, I guess my best explanation would be Road Hynosis, which is where the constant driving of a road and the focusing on it can cause delirium, unattentiveness, and almost block out your senses, it's a strange phenomenon that I only experienced this one time. I pulled onto my road way too fast and thankfully was okay, it shook me out of it. But I got home and I felt nothing still. I felt a pit in me just there. I don't believe it was my meds, though they can cause depression, but this feeling started before I had taken my meds on the first day. Well my gf graduated Saturday, we had a party and I faked a lot of smiling because I wanted her to be happy, and her dad ended up ruining that day, that's another story. After that day she was very adamant on wanting to get the jeep ready and I did my best to do so. I got insurance and out her on mine. But we still are waiting for the title. We now come to recent events. After the first week of the Depression episode, I did feel better and by the end of the work day on a Friday I was pumped up. I was happy, and probably a little crazy but it was great to feel something again, and my job was what made me feel better. I went home and the weekend went by, my mom had come by tl help us clean the house. We did pretty ok. But after that weekend the depression returned and hit worse. I started not eating as much, and I started feeling like nothing mattered anymore, and as I write this the, the suicidal thoughts started back again a day ago, and I told my girlfriend about it the first time. But the house has come undone again, and I am still trying to keep it maintained, but all I want to do is climb in bed and sometimes hope I don't wake up, I think it's thr house, I am usually fine at work. Well my girlfriend still hasn't changed since ahe graduated and she is looking for a job but... only in her area of her degree, which is fine, I want her to succeed but... I asked her to try to get another job in the meantime while she waits for those others to respond. She was upset with me, believing she it would be a waste of her degree, and I told her it wouldn't be if it's temporary to just help is get by, because my job has a wierd pay schedule and it would help us better than care of the house, maybe higher an Exterminator to fumigate the house. She did relent a little and did broaden her search and that made me feel a little more at ease. And I did ask her to try to take care of the house a little since she would be home, and still nothing gets done. My question I guess to boil this down is, is this relationship worth saving, or tryung to salvage, I asked some people and most opinions have been that my girlfriend needs to grow up, but that's not the right mentality for someone with her anxiety problems. I just don't know what I can do anymore, I feel trapped, I'm writing this at 3am in the morning because I feel terrible and don't know where to start. I have tried talking to her, begging her, to please be better and she doesn't change. I can't handle everything at home anymore, especially now that I'm back in the heat of summer in a warehouse. My trucks water pump just went out, so I used the jeep for two days and now I need a ride because one of the brakes decided to lock up. I'm falling apart and I'm wondering if maybe, I need to do better. I don't want to say my girlfriend is a bad person, she's not, but she acts like a child sometimes, and is always on the verge of being upset at a pin drop over trivial matters. She's supposed to be taking meds too for all of her problems and she refuses to remember to take them. I just don't know if this relationship can go any longer or if my depression episode is clouding my judgement. And with my adhd, it feels better to actually talk through my problem with someone, but I want this to be somewhat anonymous so I came here to reddit. I'm doing my best to get to my next psychiatrist appointment and discuss this with her too. If I'm in the wrong here I want to better myself, I want to make an effort to be a better person, I just don't feel like I have the strength anymore to go on though.
Edit: If this is at all biased, since I am only writing my perspective, I will do my best to answer any questions on her unbiased.

Sometimes you wanna be done with it all. I said no way. Not this time. I won't have it...
Just asking Gd for more clarity. And I'm getting it you know. One of the hardest things to have to face is all those people who spit in my face repeatedly... Who cursed me to no end in sight. Who thought the worst of me. Walking around not knowing anything or the reasons. I've dealt with people who have been nothing but disappointed in me since that time 28 years ago. The cringe on their faces. The lack of respect.
Asking a friend... Who is this person in this picture only to be met with the look of a cringeful disgust... Not to mention labeled as insane by that time. But it carried through. Those feelings of worthlessness. The looks of disappointment. Everywhere I turned I felt it never leave. Walking as a blind person but never really understanding why people hated me so much.
It's an awful feeling to walk up to someone with nothing but kind words and be spit at for things you were never aware of.
In my car I saw you behind me and I've asked people what do you think he was trying to say? No one could figure it out. And I'm really tired of assumptions when it comes to you. I was thinking perhaps he read the letters i wrote and it's done. That's it.
What I have learned from living with the malignant narcs is once they infect your surroundings it's impossible to decontaminate the stench. It lingers. It's meant to be embedded deep inside whomever succumbs. In my situation the only people who never have is my childhood friends and my family.
So it makes you wonder why? Was it that they live to far into ego to not really see? Although you are unaware... were they more so?
All those scenarios have applied to different areas of my life. I recently thought, you know I just need to get rejected and get it over and done with. Spit in my face one last time M. Oh, and here's a painting of some of my memories that came back. Everyone from that professional go around despised me so deeply. Would anything I said at this point even matter anymore? I would never be accepted. Not even as a friend. The stench is too deeply embedded. I caused you too much pain. You suffered so so much. How dare I. Even if I explained they would think i was lying... Mostly bc it's harder to admit you were an asshole to an underserving person for no reason. Let's just believe the lie instead. Maybe that's how it goes after so much time.
And I've been wondering why I've had really interesting things fall on my lap. How everything is lining up. Almost like Gd is saying I won't have you humiliate yourself anymore. I've given you tools that will help with what you're trying to achieve. I think as my memories have been coming back more and more clearly about the choices I made it really is hard. I've also built up my self worth and esteem as well. It brings me a lot of discomfort to be further subjected to be humiliated. I just realized though, if in fact M knows now, if he got my messages why would he want me to continually embarrass myself? Why not say I heard what really happened
You see me and M knew each other afterwards... but I didn't "know" him anymore the way he knew me. I didn't know him bc I was tortured/hypnotized... the people who knew M... well they knew more about me than I did. They knew what happened .. they decided to spit at me, cursed me most likely and make me feel like the scum of the Earth.
So I thought, Why would I do such a thing to myself, when I chose your life over my own, but I never chose for people who you knew to come at me... So much so I wanted to take my own life at one point bc nothing made sense to me anymore. The constant degrading and rejection.
I didn't realize to think that perhaps these letters have made you feel guilty over your own actions and against me bc you were unaware of the truth. It must be a hard pill to swallow when you thought I chose him. It must have been hard for you to know how badly I was tortured/hypnotized and raped by him repeatedly. And now it must be even harder to know that I chose to save you. It's a lot to take in. Especially, bc having been around everyone and having experienced how aggressive everyone became you told people. And they acted accordingly. They acted with spite .. and the acted unknowingly... And I forgive them all. Your friends, relatives, bro, mother, father, whomever you ever told... Whomever you told the story to... The part you were only aware of.
So it's like why is it so hard for me to see you? I'm not afraid of JE. After all those memories surfaced and I thought about everything I'm just afraid of being spit at, humiliated, embarrassed for existing, hated, despised...
I never knew that when I chose you over myself, it would turn into what it did. Me being completely unaware, still loving you without the knowledge or history of everything that happened... Repeatedly getting traumatized for not remembering what happened.
I got it pretty bad from anyone who sees this from an outside perspective. One thing though that I learned is that when a malignant person starts to spread rumors and lies about you they permeate deeply. So much so it doesn't matter what you say or do. You'll always be despised and hated. There's no way around it. And that's what I accept. I accept that you never respected me or would ever want anything to do with me. I accept that JE really did what he set out to do in destroying our relationship... So we could never tell our story. So that you would always hate me thinking I betrayed you.
It was the furthest thing from what I ever felt about you. And that's the part that I wanted you to know. That I never wanted you to carry any of this hate unknowingly. I forgive you for not knowing the extent of what really happened and having to deal with so many confusing issues or thoughts that would arise. I'm sorry you also had to endure what he did to you. We both got it pretty badly.
So that's what I think you were trying to say. You understand. And you have moved on. If you wanted more you would have reached out. Unlike you though his stench never penetrated through to my soul. And that's love. He never could reach and destroy that part I held onto. The part he really wanted to crush. Throughout this journey I said I would never go to that dark place and think any less of you. I understood how everyone was manipulated by him. I understood how his stench infected so many people who unknowingly fell into his traps. And I'm so proud of myself that despite getting spit at so much and looked down I just accepted it as life. Where some people are just not going to like you.
So no fear sweet person whom I still love and care about. There is no reason to make amends or paint you a picture or apologize. We both didn't do anything wrong. We don't need to apologize for having been victims of his like so many in our circles whom were affected bc of it.
And I think that was what the message was. It was always hard to figure you out. You kept your promise though. So thank you. You did your part when you didn't have to. And another reason I didn't give you my username and if you found my letters it's bc you wanted to at this point. But it was clear you understood. And I'm sorry that you had to learn about how severe it was and the choice I had to make in the end could possibly make you feel bad about the 2nd go around.
Anyway, I have these pretty cool things I've been learning recently. And it goes that were never really helpless in changing things. Even when the stench of negativity has preheated through... We have ways of clearing all that. We're not helpless and we can still have really good lives. That's my plan... Gd Willing...

GM HEGE FAM. (copy paste from Telegram)
It’s May 23rd here in Europe and you deserve your daily update.
MARKET: After the pump two days ago, we had a bit of a correction and building back up from there. 5M territory is where we are trying to build our floor now. Let’s see what today brings. Macro crypto has big news coming up. ETH ETF (dis)approval could be a catalyst here, too.
DEVELOPMENTS:
// SPACES RECAP// :
* went through the marketing push plan. Details are being worked out atm. Start probably mid next week. Rollout on a lot of areas at once.
* shorter 2-3 sec animations / gifs are being worked on to get people in before they take he time to focus on the longer ones and the HEGE story. DEV found animators that work great in DEVs style
* donated HEGE will be used slowly or OTC to not cause any dumps in price
* focus on CEXs after the marketing push
* IG and TikTok will be focused on more
* looking into YTbers for the marketing push. Suggestions welcome. Tag team in main.
/
* according to u/xcryptotracker the hege x account was top 26th in social media follower gainers in the last 24h
NUMBERS in 24h (as of writing):
Holders: 4811 > 4813
TG: 3756 > 3757
DIALOGUE OF THE DAY:
u/meathead25 “… Many communities are absolute shitholes. Like, legit disgusting stuff. Everyone here is chill, friendly, wants to build something together. A sense of building something with others and watching it grow. That's why I'm here.”
u/Alex “When lambo”
SONG REFERENCE OF THE WEEK:
u/Pyppyk “I don't care if Monday's blue
Tuesday's grey and Wednesday too
Thursday I am pumping you
It's Friday, I'm a Hog”

• Great song. If you don’t know it, google the first two lines and enjoy.

COMMENT OF THE DAY:
u/Ryan “Every other meme coin, wen lambo? hege fam.. wen Castle? we're just on another level”
Thanks for reading. Have a very hegy day!

hey!
here’s what I look like
I’m in the midwest, in the middle of my phd, using the sacred few hours of sleep I got to scroll reddit while binging on the trashiest reality TV and early 00s MTV music videos
tbh, since moving here I’ve been aching to meet people that aren’t related to my professional or academic sphere, and rarely got the time to do much outside the lab, so, here I am, it seems meeting people online could be good bet :o
some random trivia

• my work is on machine learning and proteins
• love running and cycling, pretty much any heavy cardio activity
• love playing soccer but suck at it
• love signing but suck at it
• love drawing but suck at it
• I only sing in spanish, because I got a thiccc accent and feel a bit self-conscious singing in english
• expert in early 00s shitty pop music
• best disney movie is ratatouille
• most overrated disney movie is up
• love dancing cumbia and bachata… and actually do not suck at it! lmao
• can move my ears on command
• have lived in 4 countries, 6 cities, 2 continents
• I’m trying to get into video games. help? I have a swtich, xbox, and pc
• not a fan of scifi or fantasy :(
• once got jump-scared by a possum while riding my bike
• knows two and a half languages
• love crafts (specially origami) and playing the accordion

here are two truths and a lie

• I was personally invited to a fancy rooftop party by a google hotshot, but bailed on it
• a mexican bill saved my life while I was stranded in serbia
• I was suspended from middle school for burning a whiteboard with body spray and a lighter

If you're interested in talking, send me a line about yourself!

Indigo park
Hello! I wanted to make some theories on indigo park as I thought it’s a great game with lots of room to grow, my theories get a little long so I labeled them in sections but it’s best to read them in order! And if you have any thoughts put it in the comments! I’d like to discuss!
Guide 1. 2 different kinds of monsters 2. Rambelys lack of mascot 3. Lloyd hate 4. Who is “he?” 5. Timeline
1.First I wanted to discuss what are these creatures, we see one with flesh and blood in the form of Mollie, and another as an animatronic as Lloyd, this tells us that almost each character has a variant of the two, this is shown as a Mollie animatronic is under rubble in a room to the side of the train ride attraction.
2.Another topic is the way Rambely speaks about certain items, a key point I want to point out is of him having no other variant to be seen, he’s just portrayed as an Ai, this is further proven with with two collectibles you can have him look at, one being the Rambely mask, with the mask and audio message can be heard stating. “I think so, Old Sport, and right after we got this damn raccoon costume.” And with the following part by Rambley, “Ugh, come on! They didn't even document the Indigo inventory ID for the costume!” This shows the suit was never worn as Rambley wasn’t even aware of it, “I've never seen anyone wearing one!” As he says when you first bring it to him. This shows that Rambley wasn’t aware and how annoyed he is by the lack of knowledge he has of the suit for it not being in the database. If you show Rambley the rambleberry from the arcade, he states how you should keep it for him and one day he might come out of the screen, if he did have an animatronic variant he wouldn’t be pondering on the fact of “one day” of coming out of the screen. This shows that Rambely isn’t aware of any other version of him in the real world even before the closing down of the park.
3.Which brings me to my third part, what’s with Lloyd? As soon as you met him he’s put on the center stage (no pun intended) as Rambely has a distaste for him instantly and doesn’t even see him as a friend. At first I had no idea even after doing more reading in the game, but with outside sources, it becomes more clear. Isaac Indigo is the founder of indigo park with his creations such as Rambely, this can easily be seen as Walt Disney and his creation Mickey Mouse, even the statue portrayed in the game is very similar as well as the placeholder art of Rambely there is with him in a cartoon style somewhat similar to old fashioned cartoons. I bring this up due to a fact I had to search for when looking for the similarities, and I found this one fact surprising, Walt Disney did not, in fact, like goofy. I thought this was odd but still continued to research, Walt thought goofy as a gag character that felt almost empty as his content at the time of goofy was just gag jokes, nothing more nothing less. Walt considered scrapping goofy and getting rid of him as a whole but working on goofy gave jobs to others, so Walt kept him. So why is any of this important? Because Lloyd is the goofy of indigo park. If you look at the Lloyd plush, your character states how Lloyd happened to be used less and less as time went by around the time they were a kid, this is why Lloyd has a retro plush, he’s the forgotten character of time left in the past and brought back in Indigo park. Lloyd being forgotten is also a fact, UniqueGeese states in a stream when asked about Lloyd, “Who's Lloyd? I don't know what you're talking about. (...) 'Lloyd the Lion'? Did you just make that up?" Proving that Lloyd was meant to be faded into the background after being a hated character by his own creator but only brought back in indigo park where many people can hear about him again, but why would he be brought back? This can be discussed though Finely, finely played a minor role in the first chapter but says something a bit odd, finely states how he’s blue while obviously being green, I felt this was silly, but thought maybe he was once blue at some point, this may be more of a stretch of a theory, but before the game came out, a teaser trailer is shown (and shown when Rambely is introducing you to the park when you first meet), and in one of the scenes a silhouette is shown of Finley behind Rambely, but the silhouette doesn’t at all fit the silhouette of the current design of finely, unless it was changed, an overhaul on his character to be more friendly wouldn’t be a stretch, after all he’s a serpent. So the same could be done with Lloyd, even his retro plush from the character’s opinion says how the plush doesn’t look like his old design, to a forgotten character to a character that can pushy and arrogant and even said in his introduction card, “so obnoxious to rival monarches.” Shows how he’s been a fast contender in popularity with Rambely, the face of the park, or even, a monarch of the park, even getting his own limited edition retro plush when no one else did. This shows why Rambely hates Lloyd, just as his creator did.
4.stumbled onto more information that opens a huge door of possibilities, as you walk past the Mollie animatronic, she says some static but nothing much else can be taken from that but in there she states two lines, “not Rambely” and “he hurts Lloyd” this can be seen as concerning and confusing, there’s many ways to take these two phrases, but I believe the best is, “someone is hurting Lloyd and it isn’t Rambely.” Which we never see Rambely mention even in his dislike for Lloyd, he just speaks lowly of Lloyd and doesn’t react much to what he says. This is further proven when you think about the timing, Rambely states he was stuck at the entrance until the player comes by and he would have no way of doing that before the park closed, things were kept under watch by people, even on Rambely. So that leaves the real culprit…. Rambely??? Repeating what I just said seem redundant, I just stated it’s not him and it isn’t that version of him, as an Ai, different task of the park may be dealt with many Ai to deal with different problems. We can see this Ai throughout the game in Rambely’s monitors, if Rambely glitches out enough we can see a Rambely with an orange background, inverted colors, and a train hat, this image of Rambely doesn’t have any other emotion or change, just the same image happens to pop up with the glitching, I believe this image is a place holder, and not actually Rambely, this can even be seen in the last part of the credits, the screen zooms out and we see many different emotions of Rambely, but the orange screen is nowhere to be seen, it isn’t a Rambely emotion of any kind but a different kind of Rambely, what kind? I think it’s one to counteract animatronics that are deemed dangerous, the park would have such a thing if they were going to let animatronics roam to about the park and only happens when one touches you, as we can see with Lloyd as he catches you and your critter cuff goes off. This is also why the normal Rambely isn’t aware of such a feature in the critter cuff, before you go backstage Rambely mentions the critter cuff can’t resuscitate you, meaning he knows it’s dangerous, but fails to mention that the critter cuff will just chase Lloyd off. I feel like this proves that Rambely is unsure even about himself. Rambely also states how he can’t peak behind backstage, but an Ai meant to protect those wearing the critter cuff would be in the critter cuff itself. At this point the theory goes off in three ways, 1. Mollie is just stating how the “he” is a version of Rambely but not the Rambely. 2. The he is Issac himself, In some form tormenting his hated creation. 3. Solmen, the least heard of character, is infecting the Ai, to make it lash it to her will, giving it a personality to be worthy of Mollie calling it a he. I feel three is the most possible as it follows well what solmen does in the arcade game, infecting and then turning on others.
5.With more of a full picture I think I can state it in more of a timeline, Issac indigo was an animator trying to make it by. Issac’s first creation being Lloyd, a character made out of desperation and no heart, something to get by with. Soon enough with Lloyd and beginning to have more heart in his art and wanting to make something more, he creates Rambely the raccoon, but with no more feeling that the character has to be a shell, Issac feels great about his creation, it becoming a hit for everyone to watch, soon Mollie and Finley would be added as his two friends as they encounter another a new character, Salem as there enemy and go on adventures. With all this Lloyd is faded into the background, until indigo park. The park was meant to be a story in Issac’s life and how everything has lead up to this park, but with that in mind, the idea of Lloyd was thought of, Issac’s first character would be the best choice for his park but with this idea quickly going around, it’s fell out of Isaac’s hands, all the speculating of people of this almost forgotten character, that many didn’t even know about would leave much to be deserved and disappointment if he wasn’t added now, so reluctantly he added his first character, Lloyd, the character he hated and will forever be remembered within the park. Lloyd becomes a huge hit, out shining every character, getting his own limited edition merchandise before anyone else. Issac had to find a way to make his other creations stand out more, become more life like so they can even make Lloyd be in the shadows again. Issac started with mascot suits, to make children feel there experience more life like and responsive but this could easily back fire, so he decided that Rambely wouldn’t get a suit unless results were positive, he couldn’t risk the idea of his best work being thought less of, but the workers themselves can’t be trusted, there irresponsible, always leaving and going to such places like Vegas, he needed something better, something that would portray the characters for what they really were in his head. (at this point much is left to speculation as of what was done and what Issac decided to do and how the park closed, so this is we’re I have to end the time line as I don’t have enough evidence as I’d like to continue)
Ps. UniqueGeese states how Issac is, “He's "nowhere near" as bad as William Afton.” (We can’t escape fnaf) but I thought this was interesting due to implying he’s not as bad as but not saying he’s any good, meaning he’s done something deemed evil

[Throw away account]
I met my ex the summer after high school back in my hometown. We dated for a total of 2 months (only lol) before we broke up for me to go to university. We spoke for a few months during uni, but then we decided to end it since we were starting to get a little toxic for each other. I blocked him on everything when we ended after a few silly fights.
That Christmas when I went home, he texted me to see me. I didn't see him. I didn't want to because I didn't want to bring up all the old feelings of being hurt. He's been texting me once a year since, simply asking if I was good.
A convo goes like this: "You're good?" "Yeah, you?" "Yup!"
Recently we had a convo where he told me he was seeing someone new. For context, I've been dating someone for 3 years now, so it didn't bother me at all. But he told me that he hates how things had to end between us, he always felt like he didn't have closure, and that I've changed him as a person.
This is the first girl he's spoken to since we broke up 6 years ago.
He still resents me for blocking him at the time. But I had to do it. I couldn't keep the temptation of texting him, or of him texting me. I've always felt bad about it, but I don't regret doing it. We needed to move on.
I've always thought of him as in a "what if" scenario. And anytime there's a major change in my life (career change -- moving cities, etc.) I always think back to him and reminisce.
That's not to say I do want to get back with him. I genuinely believe we never would have worked out anyway. We were both immature when we were 18 and we needed to grow as people. He still lives at home. I have no plans of moving back home.
I do feel glad that we ended on good terms instead of hating each other.
I still care about him a lot and we never did anything wrong to each other. It was just horrible timing.
But him telling me that he never had closure got me thinking. Did I ever have closure? Why do I still think about him?
Edit: why am I getting downvoted

Having attend KGLW gigs since 2015, I have first hand experienced the growth of the fanbase which is well deserved for the band. This tour the band has had this displayed on the stage prior to going on stage: "As the weirdo swarm grows, we have to work hard to keep our community inclusive. The most pit is a safe place for young, old, big, small and ppl of all genders. If you see any dickheads, alert security. Look after each other in there and BE YOURSELF. We love you all. King Gizz x"
However, it seems, particularly since COVID that respect at the concerts is being swept under a rug.
Why do we go to King Gizzard concerts? - we like their music - we want to support the band - we want to enjoy the live experience, and there are multiple acceptable ways to do this
And there are different ways to enjoy the music: - some people like to stand and nod to the music - some people like to stand and just listen - some people like to dance - some people like to mosh and move around
In my opinion and from my experience, the inclusivity is lacking: - people talking at the gig: sure, it is cool to speak between the songs if you want to say to your buddy that a performance was rad! but speaking while they play is not only disrespectful to the performing party, but also to your fellow fans who have paid money and taking their time to go and have a good experience - forcing people into a mosh pit isn't cool. I don't know what happened here, I grew up in the metal environment and the most pits are always clearly defined in the middle of the floor, while people standing in the front and on the sides down can calmly stand in their own world and not get hit in their back and crushed to the fences and side walls. Usually if someone is in the front it is because they want to see the band playing and you see too often they have to spend more time fighting people off behind them. Not everyone is going to the concert to mosh and some people are more fragile than you think. Moshing should be allowed as it is just another way to enjoy the concert. But what is right for some is not right for others. - smoking at indoor concerts is just disrespectful. If you are at a gig outside, it's fine but watch out where you blow out your smoke. Not everyone wants to go to concerts to second hand smoke, and some people may have had a bad trip on weed before and it can really make it a shitty situation for them to smell weed. - throwing beer: not sure where this came from? Since COVID here in Europe it seems that it's become a thing at football games. Now also at gigs. It's not cool to be drenched in beer. Also, don't throw it onto the stage like someone did in Berlin.
The band is preaching an inclusive concert environment. If we could actually enable anyone to enjoy the concerts they prefer it's gonna make it a much more fun experience for every party involved. I think it is worrying that despite the band preaching this, it seems that it's not something everyone really gives a shit about.
With that said, I hope everyone is going to have a lovely experience during the gigs this year and that everyone wants to contribute to a good experience 🔥

Hey everyone, I just need to get all of this off my chest because it's been weighing me down for weeks. It's a few different things
A few months ago, I told some close friends I'm trans. Big mistake. I'm not going to transition, I probably should have come out to them at the same time I came out publicly (which would end up being never), but I didn't. When they'd say things that implied that they still saw me as male, I would get upset. Not like yelling and throwing things upset, but it made me sad, and I would sometimes tell them. It's so stupid. I still look like a man, there's no reason for them to see me as anything else, but I still ran my fucking mouth when they "misgendered" me (gendered me correctly according to my presentation and public identification). I want to apologize but it's been months and they've started referring to me as female with more ease, so I don't know if it would be weird.
I present the way I want to, that's the worst part. Aside from aspects of my body like hair (facial or otherwise), or my general body composition, I like my clothes. I wish I could be a more masculine woman, but I'd just look like a man unless I transitioned medically, which, as I've established, I am not going to.
I'm exclusively attracted to women, and being a man just makes me feel so creepy and gross. Experiencing the slightest bit of sexual attraction makes me feel legitimately sick to my stomach, especially when the woman I'm attracted to happens to be a lesbian on the internet and all the comments are "she's for the girls, men go away." I don't know why it's so embarrassing. I wish I were a gay man. I honestly feel like that would be so much less shameful for me.
I hate my body, but I don't know if it's a gender thing or not. I'm overweight, definitely fat but with noticeably muscular body composition on top. I'm broad, and pretty tall. I am embarrassed by the way my body looks, especially without clothing. I don't know if I would be happier if I were thin. I'd probably feel at least slightly less ashamed of being attracted to people. If I didn't look like the stereotypical incel creep.
I think that's a big part of it. I don't know if I'm trans or dont like being perceived as a big dumb ugly man. Probably a combination of the two. That's most likely, as being perceived as any sort of man makes me feel icky. I just wish I could be me, but all anyone is ever gonna see when they look at me is a man. It's like body dysmorphia and social gender dysphoria had a baby and that baby grew up to really like blazers.
I will also say, amongst women in my community, I am generally well-liked. The majority of my friends are female, and I have a positive reputation. Even then, being seen and treated as a man is less than ideal, even though this is probably best case scenario in my circumstance. I am not generally perceived by people who know me as a "creepy incel," but people who don't know me could definitely make that assumption based on my appearance, and that alone is what makes me so ashamed of being attracted to women. The element of looking like a creepy man.
I tried talking to a therapist. Talked to her for like a month before telling her I experience dysphoria. She bombarded me with a bunch of questions, I didn't feel like she believed me. She said "maybe you're a gay man, " (I wish) "maybe you just don't like toxic masculinity, you can be a man and a good person," (tried that, didn't like it) and my favorite, "estrogen makes you gain weight. If you want to lose weight you should build up your testosterone. Maybe your testosterone is low and that's why you feel like you want to be a woman. There are supplements to fix that." (This is loaded. Is she advocating the use of anabolic steroids? Probably not but that would at least be a really funny way to invalidate my identity.)
This has all just been bubbling up. I feel bad for trying to make cis friends treat me like a woman when I'm not, I feel bad for being attracted to women while looking the way I do (both in masculinity and in appearance within masculinity), and I feel bad for having no interest in presenting "fem", I just want to be butch but that's not allowed. I'll be called a liar.
Thanks for reading, friends. I'm sorry for the big long yap, I'm just really dealing with a lot of huge emotions right now and there's nobody in my life I can talk to about it. I hope it was at least somewhat well-written.

Asslam o alikum,
I am 21 F in US and I recently got out of a “situationship” with a guy I met on a Muslim dating app 💀 we spoke for about 4-5 months and during Ramadan he told me that he wants to end it as it’s not Islamically right. I completely agreed with him because it also made me feel guilty. Being in the US I know dating is so common and some people even try “halal dating” idk if that even works. It was my first situationship and I really thought I would marry him… but not sure about that
After Ramadan he came back asking for another chance and I honestly still had feelings for him and wished it would work out. But I did reply to him that if you left me to get closer with Allah then it doesn’t make sense to keep talking again. And that he should contact me in 1-2 years as he isn’t ready to get married yet. He also isn’t the assertive type and I’m not sure if he would actually even have the courage to tell his family about me.
It’s been about a month since we cut all contact and his last message to me was “if you find someone, I would say go for it” (he clearly doesn’t like me anymore right?)
Anyways fast forward I redownloaded the app to see if my account is hidden or not as I don’t want people seeing me on it and I saw he updated his profile and is now a gold member so he basically is paying on the app…. To talk to more girls I guess
I am asking advice on if I should talk to this potential guy. It’s my first proposal so I’m so nervous.
My mom told me about a marriage proposal. He is 24 years old, only son and his family seems kind and financially they are good as well. He graduated and is working I believe. I also graduated this year but with my degree I need to go back to school to make a decent living and to be financially independent. I honestly am scared of marriage as I just seen a lot of bad marriages while growing up. My mom is telling me to talk to the guy and see how it goes but I am not sure if I am ready for marriage honestly. I also don’t think I’m over my situationship even though I really should get over it.
Would you say I should talk to the guy and see how it goes as he seems like a good person? Or should I focus on myself and try to get financially stable before even thinking about marriage?

First/Previous
Carrion fowls perched along the far walls’ parapets and cawed vaguely with their red wetted beaks in whatever direction; other scavengers supped at the puddles or pecked along the softened flesh of the dead. The birds, variable vultures, hopped across the rubble and curiously side-eyed corpses and pierced the bruise-blackened bloated skins and stripped away long muscle threads and tossed them to catch, to choke back on what they’d done.
The birds which stared, looked dumbly from their perches, and watched Boss Maron (what was he a boss of anymore?) stumble around where he was. His shirt was tattered and bloodied-marks or claws shown across his forearms and his belly. He moved like a drunkard with his feet wide apart. In some commotion, he’d lost a boot and swiveled as carefully as he could when putting his bare right foot forward. My brother seemed to spawn from the mess, to arise only from his slumber at the sign of my approach and I wondered about destiny or fate and as I saw him there, as terrible as he was, he was no match if not for the pistol which hung from the holster on his hip.
In getting closer, I saw the band from his hat had burst and so hung stringlike from the brim and dangled with his footfalls by the eyepatch he wore.
A series of collapsed, nearly unrecognizable apartments had fallen and been flattened or forced to bend in jagged directions; old catwalk rails jutted from the spot of destruction like a mad spider’s legs—an unsettling image. This seemed to have been the place Maron took refuge from the attack.
Wherever I went, it seemed that death was either fast approaching or near ahead so I never could tell from what direction to expect it; but expecting death itself was sometimes enough. I took to a white and curved piece of stone dilapidation—likely a piece from the hydro towers—and used it to purchase higher ground and saw Maron stumble nearer. Through the new byways created by the destruction, he remained slow and struggled and remained so far out that I was uncertain whether he saw me.
The hiss of spitting broken water pipes filled the lulls between the bird calls. The sun was deep yellow against the red sky. The wind was cool and held me aloft like a puppet.
Precariously, I hunkered at my elevated position and rummaged through my satchel but found nothing. Instead, I left it there in that spot and climbed carefully to the earth and unbuckled the belt from around my waist and held it whip-ready, opposite the buckle-end; it was a thin and cheap thing but perhaps good enough. I moved toward my brother, openly. Whatever would be.
Forty yards separated us and there was enough of an area of open earth among the piled collections of destruction; he still looked like a shadow, like a half-illusion of a man against the backdrop of interlocking wreckage.
“Hey!” I called.
Maron stopped where he was and craned his head forward; dust rose from around his feet then settled. “Harlan?” He asked.
“Yeah.”
“I can’t see you too good, you know.” Maron scratched his right eye with a rotating knuckle; the skin seemed irritated. “Those bugs itch like a bitch, don’t they?”
“So they say,” I spat between where I’d spaced my legs.
He placed his hand on the handle of the revolver which stood out on his hip. “I could kill you, Harlan. I’ve got a clear shot here.”
“Yeah.”
“You’d deserve it, especially after what you did.” His voice was gravelly; he coughed and wiped his mouth with a forearm.
I took a small step forward and Maron removed the revolver from its holster but kept it pointed to the ground.
I shook my head and remained still again. “What about after all you did?”
“Me?” he laughed sickly, “You’re one to talk. I guess there’s no hiding it anymore. I was ashamed of you. You—cavortin’ with demons—that’s all you do. I think I saw you speak to them a couple times. I feel like you whisper to them in your sleep. I knew what kind of man you were all this time and I let you go on.”
“You let me, huh?” I glanced to the sky and breathed deep and listened to the birds. A tight-lipped expression pulled my face almost like a smile and I gritted my teeth. “Here I thought I let you.”
Maron laughed again wetly and remained with his gun down. The gunmetal shone bright as silver from either cleaning or handling; it was good to know he’d taken care of it at least.
“I cried about you,” I said—some roiling thing rolled over in the pit of my stomach.
“So?” he asked the sky.
I closed the space between us by a quarter or more and stopped. “So, did you ever cry about me? Did you ever cry about them?” The trailing end of my sentence nearly broke my voice, and I abruptly finished the words to protest it.
Maron shrugged. “’Course I did. All the time. For them. For you?” He shook his head. In the light—just so—his right eye glowed white; blood trickled from around the bottom eyelid from over-rubbing while yellow infection oozed from the bottom of the patch over his left eye. “Somethin’s wrong in you. You did something. I know you did. Maybe you prayed to them things. Maybe you asked for it—Lady did weird seances before she,” with his free hand, he twirled a finger by his ear. “Maybe you spoke to them and did what you did. All that good and evil talk that Jackson went on about doesn’t matter anymore,” Maron shrugged then nodded and wriggled his mustache in thought.
“You used to call him dad,” I said.
“We didn’t have any dads, you and me. Looking back now, I see our mother—if she was—was the worst about it. We were some ragtag bunch of monster hunters? There ain’t any good and evil in this world and that’s a fact. It’s all just livin’.”
“What made you that way?”
“What way’s that, Harlan?” He sighed.
“I thought you’d be a good man. You were a sweet boy.”
“I guess.” His blind gaze trailed away, watched the birds on the far walls, and his uncovered bleeding eye blinked slowly and with effort; he rubbed it again and smeared blood across his cheek and blinked more and seemed to focus. “What makes you sure you’re a good man?”
“I ain’t.”
“I didn’t figure you were.” His eye traced the scenery, seemed to look everywhere and beyond me even. “You do all this too? You call down your buddies for all this? I was afraid of you for a long time. Now I know I was right.”
“Mm. I didn’t.”
“Quite the coincidence that you’d hang and then all this happens to stop it. Nice for you. Look around at all them bodies. Tell me it’s worth it. I know you and I know what you are. Harold didn’t believe it—hell I didn’t want to believe it. Here we are.”
I shook my head and felt silly standing there and holding my belt like a dead snake by my side. “It wasn’t too long ago I thought similarly of you. I thought you’d been some possessed thing, something that wasn’t my brother anymore. Like you said. Here we are. I was blind for so long and I thought it couldn’t be that you’d be this way all on your own. I saw you grow into something unrecognizable,” My shoulders rolled with a shrug. “What’s it matter? What’s any of it matter? You thought I was some witch and I thought maybe some demon hijacked your body! What’s it matter? It doesn’t. I don’t care if you are who you are because of me or because of this world—it’s over. And here we are.” I took a gulp of air; it was rotten. “I loved you. I saw something change in you and blamed myself, blamed the demons; maybe you were a mutant! Bah! It’s just you. Whatever you are is just you—doesn’t really matter what made it. I don’t know how I could cry over someone like that. I just don’t know.”
Maron nodded at me, and I took a step forward; the Boss sheriff leveled the long barrel Colt in my direction. The sun beat down and I took another step forward and another until I was pacing, shoulders moving in tandem with each step—though my left knee twinged, it wasn’t pain; there was too much adrenaline for pain. The gun erupted, broke the dead air, a few birds cawed and flapped away but mostly remained and looked on with apathetic curiosity. I stood still. Maron missed, took aim again, and I began to further close the gap.
The pistol rang again; my imagination insisted I felt the breeze from the bullet. I did not care. Here we were and here it would be. Again, twice more, the gun cried out; the last of that duo spiked the earth up at my feet and sent dust into the air; I passed through it.
With Maron nearly in arm’s reach, I reared with the belt—remaining with my right leg on the backfoot—I swung the strap out like a whip and felt the belt slack as the buckle met Maron’s nose.
He stumbled backward, fired another round into the air and my ears rang and I launched into him.
With him being weak and feeble and ill and tired as he was, he fell slowly in the way that people do when they attempt to stop themselves from going. He spun on his naked heel and landed on his knees, hands in the dirt, revolver hilt loosely clamped in his fist. I sent a boot to his stomach and from seemingly nowhere a wild scream came from me—it was a moment of human satisfaction.
He laughed there on the ground, and it was so like gasping for air that I wasn’t sure that’s what I heard. “I hit you once, I see only just a bit out of the right and I still hit you!”
The numbness forgave a moment of pain—a jolt ran up my left arm. Without a moment afforded to inspect myself, I launched another kick just as he came around to raise his head. My boot caught his chin and clicked his teeth together; blood ran like a spigot from his mouth while the cowboy hat tumbled off the crown of his head and landed in the dirt beside him.
His eyepatch came unplaced from his left eye and rested over his brow before the strings came loose and the object fell off him. The black hole there in his head shone starkly when he calmed his head to look up at me; the other eye was milk white.
“I’m dying,” he said, “I’m dying, but I’m a pretty good shot, ain’t I?”
I didn’t say anything and placed my heel on his shoulder and propelled him over, so he fell onto his back. There on the ground, the pistol lay. I bent and dropped the belt and lifted the pistol— a single shot left. The thing was heavier than the metal it was.
Maron lifted up again and spoke, “I’m dying,” he repeated, “I’m dying.” His head rocked forward and back in exaggeration.
I shoved him down again, remembered the bodies he hung, remembered the people he assaulted, remembered the tortures—with him looking up at me though, I briefly remembered the boy behind that man’s face. I didn’t say anything because I couldn’t.
“I see a little out of the right, Harlan—like I said. C’mere a minute. Just a minute. Or a second even. All I want is a second. C’mere and let me see you a little clear for just one second.”
I never was a good shot anyway, but that wouldn’t have mattered; I angled the revolver out from my body. He craned his head up for a better look maybe—like a varmint from a hole—and when he did, I fired the last shot and even though he’d grown so large in my mind, he still fell over like any man would. Blood spurted then trailed from his head; I swallowed a noise back.
Warm pain radiated from my left bicep, and I knew what it was; I threw back my jacket, so it hung only off my right shoulder and examined the spot. The notch was swollen, the flesh was gnarly and leaked. I cupped the heel of my hand to the wound while still holding the revolver and felt my heartbeat in it. Nothing stitches wouldn’t fix. So, Maron was a good shot. I lumbered over the corpse and stared into the one solid eye. Even blind, he got me once.
I sighed and half-straddled the corpse and ripped the gun belt off his waist and shoved it under my armpit then waddled over the dead man to the hat that’d fallen in the dirt. Our mother’s hat fit loose on my head, but her old belt slotted around me snug.
The wound didn’t clot, and blood ran in webs down my forearm and across the back of my hand. I shifted to look to the place I’d left the satchel and I saw an audience there—the underground survivors followed me out; they were arranged like tin solders frozen among the rubble outcroppings. Mal was there and nearest me. She called something out, but I didn’t respond. I shook my head as if to let them know I didn’t care and began to walk towards the piece of white rock. The broken band of the hat fell into the periphery of my left eye like a wayward strand of hair.
I slung the revolver into the holster on my hip and kept my right hand to my left bicep and gritted my teeth at the growing pain. Ointments were in the satchel and bandages and a bit of liquor—wizard brand.
Mal rushed out to me and slammed into me, and nearly put me over and the others too began to clamor off their perches—how they looked at me just like the birds.
Mal slammed her hands onto my shoulders. “You just killed and robbed him.”
I laughed. “Alright.”
“Why?”
I saw the boy—William—too had come and he remained among the small crowd that came around me.
“This needs treating,” I angled my head at the wound I held.
“What’d you kill him for?” asked Mal, again.
I ignored her, pushed beyond, and whispered something about going home.
The levels to the satchel were slow going and the people spoke amongst themselves, and I slammed my bottom onto the flat elevation and began to clean and wipe down. I fumbled with my right hand and kept my neck twisted just so and pried the wound a bit with my index finger and thumb. Blood ripped out of the spot, and I laughed and stopped and rewiped. Inside of the satchel there was a handheld staple gun. I put it to the spot, trying to keep the swollen opening closed. After a few overzealous clicks, I sighed and dropped the staple gun into the satchel.
From where I was, Maron looked small.
Like a whisper on the wind, I heard, I brought him to you one last time. Bravo! Well done!
I twisted around lackadaisically searching for the point of the voice and didn’t find it. “Stupid,” I whispered to myself.
Then I popped casually to my feet, felt the mild blood loss send me dizzy and I momentarily felt like I’d fall over and break my neck in front of all those fine people—what a laugh riot!
Mal’s incredulous expression was obvious even with the distance. “Hey!” I called out to Mal, to all of them, “I’m going home.”
“Where’s home?” asked someone.
“C’mon with me if you want.”
Some wanted and some didn’t, and we gathered twenty strong and Mal and William were among them. Lady surprisingly decided to fall along with those of us that left. Those that remained certainly died, but who’s to say?
All the horses were dead and even in searching for the oil wagon I’d rode in on, I couldn’t find it. Walking never bothered me anyway. When I grew tired, I used some discarded metal post as a third leg. We walked it and I thought it felt like a pilgrimage—damn all other religiosity. I hoped for the one and true religion: love.
Seven died westward. William succumbed to the skitterbugs and I managed to bury him even while others regarded the practice with apathy. Mal went quickly by a skin taker, and yet Lady remained; she was a hanger-on.
The only one that mattered to me was the one waiting for me—if they still waited. I hoped they did.
We saw Alexandria at dawn after many days of travel. Upon the sight of the arch along the skyline, whispers came over our group and one fellow wondered aloud if the arch was the source of all the magic the wizards knew. Lady rebutted the claim and cursed at the thought of it. Still though, she followed. I mindlessly told them it was the gateway to the west but that didn’t mean a thing to anybody at all.
Point-hatted scouts saw us and let us through while the sky was still waking. The nerves in my body danced like bugs. Whatever negative providence that’d taken over my life was gone at last. Though the weight remained, perhaps I could let it go with time. I wanted to.
Seeing Suzanne like that, still tired and yawning and even brow furrowed, I stumbled into them and pressed their face to mine, and I told them I’d never let them go and I told them it was over, and Suzanne asked me where the wagon was.
I didn’t have an answer for that and instead buried my nose behind their ear.
All they asked me then was, “Really, it’s over?”
“It’s over. I’m better now. Well—I might not be better, but I will be.”
A fat dog brushed my leg, and it was Trouble—the animal was kept on a lead by Gemma which tugged on the collar just a bit to keep the dog from tangling the lead around our legs. The girl beamed and I wasn’t sure I’d ever seen her so genuine as that. Her face was rounded from health.
I pulled Suzanne into another hug and hushed, “My legs are tired now.” We kept our arms around each other; I hoped they didn’t want to let me go just like how I didn’t want to let them go. The only thing that hurt was knowing I’d hurt Suzanne.
It felt ridiculous because it was, but I was an optometrist finally. It wouldn’t be easy, but I saw everything very clearly.
First/Previous
Archive

Blood Stealer Cult
Planet B1004. That is the name by which the galaxy knows this world. Literally a no name ball of dirt, with small oceans, mostly filled with uneven hill sides and thick forests, where the local rivers run like veins. The imperium knows it as a feudal world which pay its tithes, albeit with some difficulty, and even when they do, their resources are found lacking. A useless world, allowed to live only by the grace of the God Emperor.
The people of the world call it Nocterwächt.
The people mostly live quiet lives, tending to their crop, their farms and livestock, while a few brave souls strike out to trade between villages. The nobility is unorganized to say the least, but they get along. Barons and Lords meet on many occasions in neighboring estates for grand galas, or at least, grand by the definition of this world, where they mingle and talk amongst themselves. Were pleasantries are exchanged almost as much as backroom deals, coin, and substances.
In these circles, you more or less know everyone who attends these galas. Yet none are more well known than Lady Sophia, of the Southeast Mountains. She is quiet, almost blending into the background, if not for those eyes and smile. So soft, warm, almost inviting. It's intimidating to approach her, yes. When seeing her from afar, you might feel a tightening sensation in your chest. A trembling in your legs. As she swirls her glass of red wine absentmindedly, and no doubt dreaming of the food her household is so infamous for, a primal fear may overtake you. Like a rabbit staring at a wolf slowly consuming its kill.
But all of that melts away, once you approach her, and she smiles at you. Men and women alike have spoken about how talking with her is soothing beyond any aphrodisiac. How her quiet voice sends shivers down their spine, so slow, soft, mesmerizing. Enchanting almost, some would even say.
Despite her talking to many, nobody can truly claim to know her. Some have met with her on outings, some even courted her even. But details are...hard to recall.
Everyone knows of her father. Well, in passing, that is. The reclusive lord is seldom known to leave his manor, which he claim decades ago, if not centuries. No one knows how old he is, but it is a testament to the family’s wealth that he has managed to get so many rejuvenating treatments, a rarity amongst the nobles of this world. Yet it is strange how nobody has ever seen him take off world...
Probably the percs of having one of your daughters be an inquisitor. Or well, an apprentice she was, before she was adopted by the Master of the Manor. So taken was she by him when she visited the planet, on some sort of wild goose chase the inquisition is so well known on going, that she wished to become part of his family. Ever since, some of her ex-colleagues have come to see her. Some very angry. Most only need a conversation with Sophia to leave though. But some are...more persistent. Chasing after the Lord and his Barony relentlessly. But, they must be satisfied at some point. Cause they are never seen again.
The nobles cannot understand why their peasants are so afraid of the Barony. They speak of mindless hordes of thralls, men of pale skin and smiles too wide, too sincere when they describe consuming the flesh of the living and harvesting their blood. Hulking behemoths, conniving highway men, and too many armed monsters with too many teeth lurking in the shadows, moving between trees at blurring speeds that none but the Emperor's Angels should be able to move. Launching from their hiding space to consume your blood, before they take you, and you disappear into the night.
Baseless rumors and superstitions. Sophia herself said so.
Their domain is known for its mutations yes, but nothing vile or inhuman about it. And their people do possess a grim sense of humor, but who doesn't in this world. Her brother is a prime example. Master Gin is an unpleasant, but brilliant young man, who looks far older than he is. The stress from running a multi-planetary business, no doubt.
The GSC, or rather, Gin's Stellar Crust, boomed in popularity quickly, for both its taste and affordability. You would not know it from looking at him, but the young lord is apparently a pretty good Sheff, utilizing an old instruction book to make a delicacy called 'Pi-zza'. Using a homemade recipe to create one of the most delicious foods on this side of the galaxy, a favorite amongst workers apparently, delivered by truck, or bike, right to them.
So what if they are rumored to use some rare herbs that are found on their mountain side, said to quiet the minds of men, make them simple? What if your skin might turn a little paler if you eat it? What if you find the Lady a little more attractive, a little more alluring, to the point you can hear her voice at night, when alone in your room, or even in your dreams, once you consume this nectar in solid form.
Coincidences. Here say. Superstitions.
Don't get focused on the blabbering’s of the uneducated mashes, warning you against it. Focus on the Crust. Focus on the Sauce. That delicious, delicious sauce.
All is quiet on planet B1004. All is quiet on this side of the galaxy.
There is nothing suspicious here. Nothing to worry about.
Just eat.
Eat.
Eat