EDIT: I RECOVERED EVERYTHING!!! Someone kind suggested posting how I did it so that others can find this post and know what to do. Hope this helps someone in future!
After my daughter died in January I changed my phone number. I didn’t realize WhatsApp was dependent on a phone number to work and so never updated my new number in the app. Now someone has taken complete control of the account, I’m locked out on my phone (same phone / new #) and can’t see the old chat history - I searched this sub for keywords “hacked” “new phone number” “locked out” and I tried reaching out to the person via text but they didn’t respond. It looks like there’s nothing I can do as the new user probably deleted all the messages? But wanted to double check with people who are more knowledgeable. Thanks in advance.
A) Do NOT delete the app. If you do that, you will lose your data B) You would have been auto-logged out of your account when the person with your old phone number updated their WhatsApp profile with the number C) When you open the app it will prompt you for phone number and password. Enter your NEW number D) You may get an error message saying this number is not associated with a WhatsApp account. Ignore it. E) Send a verification code. YOU WILL NOT GET ANY CODE - BE PATIENT! F) After 60 seconds, a link that says “get help” will appear clickable. Select this. G) Select “Send SMS”. You should now get the code on your new phone number- enter it and congrats, you’re in! NOTE: This worked on an iPhone 12 that had not been backed up to the cloud. The chat history was stored locally on the device. ONLY the phone number was changed.

Just a week ago, my brother unfortunately took his own life. He left along various devices, and our family is working to untangle what needs to be untangled, along with trying to collect any memories (photos, etc) that would be nice to remember him by. We believe there may also be notes on his devices left for the family.
His phone was destroyed that night, but his laptop remains. It is a Macbook Pro, seems to be a fairly recent M2. It has a Yubikey 5C Nano plugged into the drive. He also left his Yubikey 5C NFC.
We are having the most trouble trying to get access to his iCloud account and I am here seeking advice as I have not personally used any of these 2FA methods before. I've got various questions here, but would appreciate any tips anyone in this community may have for how we may recover some of his last memories.

• When the Nano is plugged into the Macbook, the MacOS login page says "Please enter a PIN". I've read online that there's something w/t a maximum number of PIN attempts on a Yubikey before it disables/resets. Is that true for MacOS login attempts?
• I've also read that MacOS requires a numeric-only PIN that must be 6-8 characters in length. Is that true? That can help narrow down a few attempts
• When I am working to login to the laptop and I press the little button on the Nano, it types in a bunch of characters into the password text input. Am I correct in assuming that is not an actual PIN? What is that being input?
• If I just remove the Nano from the laptop, it seems to go back to just normal password input. Is that an actual valid login form once he's registered his Yubikey to the device? We can try various passwords if so, just not sure if they will actually work.
• I've read some other things about PINs and PUKs but I'm having a little bit of trouble understanding. Is the PIN for the key the same as the PIN that might be required for MacOS/iCloud login? Can I possibly insert the keys into a new device to try to reset the PINs? Or will that end up erasing previous PINs and permanently lock us out?
• Lastly, because I want to make sure I'm not missing the forest for the trees, the goal is recover whatever information I can from iCloud. He was still on our family phone plan, so we transferred his number to a temporary phone so we could access any SMS 2FA applications. We recovered access to his various Google/Gmail accounts. This community is obviously very security-oriented - are there any other ideas for how we might be able to get access to his iCloud account? I was hoping between phone number access and backup recovery email access that might be enough, but it seems that iCloud is stuck on this Security Key access.

Sorry for the long-winded post, I appreciate anyone's help. I'm sure I'm leaving out many important details, so let me know if I'm missing anything that might help.

A month or so ago I busted my phone, and it was a huge pain in the ass. Aside from some lost data which was minor, the biggest PIA was resetting MFA, getting in touch with my US banks, and any other services that were tied to my phone. The experience also made me take a step back and realize I am pretty lax with security, and if someone had gotten hold of my phone and somehow god-forbid gotten the passcode, then I'd be fucked. They could do so much damage with unlimited access to my email + MFA SMS, even in just a few hours.
As a result, I kind of went down the ADHD rabbit hole hyper-fixating on how best to "optimize" my iPhone and iCloud configuration for two things:

1. If it breaks, the transition to a new device will be relatively painless. I won't have to spend several days stressing and trying to find the right international customer support number for a myriad of institutions and services to get into my accounts.
   
2. If it gets stolen and compromised, then there will be enough barriers such that the I'll have enough time to lock down the device and/or my accounts remotely before the thief can get key data or move funds.
   

So I put together this guide and checklist that I thought I'd share with others. I am a programmer but by no means a security guru, and so if any IT, DevOps, or SecOps folks want to chime-in with suggestions or improvements, please do.

Requirements

• an iPhone XR, iPhone XS, iPhone 11, iPhone 12, iPhone 13, iPhone SE (2nd generation), and iPhone 14 or newer for eSIM compatibility.
• a US-based carrier with eSIM support + a pay-as-you-go model for international travel (I use Verizon)
• iOS 17 or above (may not be strictly necessary, but I know my setup works with iOS 17.4.1)
• a password manager. I personally use 1Password because it works, is reliable, has cross-device support, and is easy and intuitive. It's also only $3/month.

Dual Sim Setup

I have been rocking an iPhone 12 for the past few years, and it's served me very well. I know the newer iPhones (14 and up) no longer offer physical SIM card support, but carriers in most developing countries are behind the curve. Even if they offer eSIM support, it's been my experience that it's a major headache to get setup, there is a lack of customer support in English, and they may even require a local ID to register the eSIM. It's way easier to just head to a shop and pay $5 for a SIM card, load some funds onto it, and then you're good to go.
The eSIM has been very helpful for maintaining a US phone number for which I can receive SMS texts from my banks and other financial services as well as continue to use iMessage with all my US contacts since hardly anybody is on Whatsapp.
Most, if not all, carriers in the US support eSIMs now, and so you should try to find a carrier that offers an international pay-as-you-go plan. Verizon offers two international plans - one is a "Travel Pass" where it's a flat fee of $10/day anywhere outside the US or Canada (even for just one text message). The other is "pay for what you use" which has a rate per text, minute, and mb. For my US plan, I only care about receiving SMS texts from my banks and the occasional phone call to a service that doesn't have an international, toll-free number. Data will always be cheaper outside the US, so I disable cellular data switching for my US line.
The last time I was in the US was for the holidays and I bought 2 used iPhone 12's for about $200 each. They have some scuffs, but they're perfectly serviceable. In LATAM, it also doesn't attract nearly as much unwanted attention in the street as an iPhone 14 or 15.
I brought these with me as extra devices. When my phone busted last month, thankfully I had a backup in iCloud and everything was loaded in a few minutes as normal. This was before I was using the eSIM, but if I had the eSIM I could just go to Verizon support online via chat and they could help me switch the line to the new device easily.

Basic Configurations

• Always use the latest version of firmware
• Require a passcode that's unique to that device.
• Use FaceID instead of passcode when possible (a thief can't snipe your passcode from a distance if you unlock your phone with FaceID)
• Set auto-lock to 30 seconds (lowest possible)
• Erase data upon excessive passcode failures note, this is complemented in a later step with daily backups. The odds of you putting in the wrong passcode 10 times is low, but in the event you do and you wipe the device by accident, you should be able to easily load in a back-up from the previous day)
• Turn off "Ask to Join Networks"
• Forget unused networks so that you don't rejoin automatically (airports, hotels, etc.)

Creating Backups

• Set iCloud backups to run automatically every night. This will allow you to load your entire phone as is (contacts, call history, iMessages, apps, even your wallpaper) onto another device during setup. The iCloud backup usually runs at 2am while I'm sleeping.
• You may need to pay for a higher tier in iCloud if you have too much stored on your phone. It's $3/month for 200gb of iCloud storage, and I find it worth it. Though I know some people with tens of thousands of photos for which 200gb might not be enough.

Password Policy

• For any accounts that may contain sensitive data (payments, PII, etc), always generate a unique password with 1Password. Don't reuse passwords. Same goes for PIN codes.
• For core accounts, create a strong but memorable password and then memorize it. The odds of getting locked out of 1Password are low if you're diligent, but for 2 or 3 core accounts (where you access money, your primary recovery email, your iCloud, 1Password), it's worth it to create strong, unique passwords for each core service and memorize them.
• I try not to reuse passwords in general, but I still sometimes am lazy and use one of my handful of typical passwords if there's no sensitive data collected by the service and it's a service I don't use often.

MFA

Set up MFA with everything. Add multiple options if possible. My preferred MFA options are as follows:

1. One-time code that renews every 30 seconds. This is device agnostic and can be stored in 1Password. You could also use Microsoft Authenticator, Google Authenticator, Authy or similar, but there's just more overhead to now recover those accounts if your device becomes inaccessible.
2. One-time code to recovery email.
3. One-time code via SMS to my US phone number. On the pay-as-you-go Verizon plan, I only pay 5 cents per text message received. It's worth it to keep one consistent number.
4. List of recovery codes (stored in 1Password as an attached txt file for the given account)
5. Use another app for verification (Google does this a lot).

Lockdown your iCloud security

• Enable MFA.
• Create a strong, unique password.
• Remove any old or unused devices from the iCloud account (old phones, ipods, etc).
• Enable "Find My" for all of your devices.
• In Find My, configure all devices to send the last known location.
• In Find My, enable the configuration to remotely wipe a device.

In the event your phone is stolen, the idea is you could run back to any of your devices or even use a friend's device to log into iCloud on the web, go to Find My, and then in a single button click you can lock and wipe the stolen device. If the thief turned off the device or disabled wifi/cellular, then as soon as it comes back online it will be wiped.

Final Clean-Up

• Move any compromising photos to the "hidden" folder (which requires FaceID or passcode to unlock)
• Review the Files app for any documents containing sensitive info. If you need these documents to be accessible on mobile, then move them to 1Password and delete them from the Files app.
• Create a shortcut to trigger the lock screen (and thus require FaceID or passcode) when specific apps are opened (banking, email, photos, etc).
• Not sure if this is best practice, but I just keep everything in 1P and turn off apple keychain and the apple built-in password manager. I also don't save passwords in Chrome or Safari.

Extra tips

These aren't really iPhone tips but general tips. They are probably obvious to you if you aren't as scatterbrained as me, but I figured that I'd drop them here in case they help someone.

• Add thorough security measures to iCloud, primary email, and any banking or financial services. Review each account and make sure you have a strong, unique password as well as a unique PIN, MFA configured, login alerts, recovery codes, and an international, 24-hour toll-free phone number stored somewhere to contact the service in the event of a crisis. For banking services, add withdrawal limits, regional restrictions (if you bounce between the same few countries), and SMS notifications for charges over a certain threshold. Open up a second checking account with a separate debit card for trips to the ATM.
• Consolidate and close any unused bank accounts. I realized that on my phone I had Revolut, Venmo, Paypal, Nequi, plus 4 US banking institutions. I took this time to close my Discover account (which is pretty much useless outside the US anyway), close my Revolut account since I'm hardly ever in the UK/EU, and consolidate investment accounts from different institutions into just a handful that's easier to monitor.

Yo. It all started 1 month ago, I was called on private numbers, continued randomly after 2 hours with calls from numbers from Myanmar and Denmark (I am from Romania), then he tried 2-3 hours to connect on Instagram ( I got 100 codes on SMS and WhatsApp), Facebook and email account (with VPN, logically). Recently, I opened my Instagram account where I received many requests from bots. I didn't click on the link, and I saw that my account had been hacked next day, email had been changed and sending dubious links to all my friends. Then the next day my WhatsApp account was hacked, I still don't understand how, and I couldn't get it back, it's been 4 days I think. About 1 hour ago, my TikTok account was hacked, and I get continuous emails from Steam, Spotify, Instagram (again), Discord, Reddit and other apps where I have email or phone number. Now I've seen that the tiktok account has been linked to the Instagram account, though I've recovered it
Always when an account has been hacked, the picture has been changed to a naked woman, the name has been changed, and it sends all friends dubious links.
A friend might talk about it here, I'm waiting for solving, thanks, btw, I had 2FA on tiktok. Sorry for the poor English, but I'm devastated rn..

I 25M have been with my wife 25F since middle school (11 years). We recently got married within the past couple of years. I thought we had a very transparent and open line of communication. Just recently she started going back to college full-time. She also joined a couple of clubs to occupy more of her time.
During one of the club events a couple of months ago, she helped by trimming some flowers to hand out. As time went on the helping group decreases as folks start to head home. Leaving just a guy and my wife in the room alone. At this event, he asks her for her number and she gives it to him, establishing "I am married" as she does it. They proceed to text for the next couple of days as well as exchange discord accounts to talk there as well. She tell me at some point and I ask if she is interested in him, she says "no, he is too young" (keep in mind there is only a 4-year age difference).
One night (about a month ago), around 1 am, I came into her office and noticed it was just them talking and giggling in a voice chat. I go to bed, and 3 am rolls around, and they are still talking. I ask her to get off, as well as establish a boundary that it makes me uncomfortable they are talking so late alone. I also tell her that I find it weird that they are talking at all. Keep in mind at no point during this entire thing, do I ever meet him or speak with him.
Then recently I go on a work trip and noticed my wife is posting more on Snapchat as well which seems off to me. When I got home, I get this gut feeling to check her phone, and couldn't find this guy anywhere. I found a couple discord messages (from around the time I told her I was uncomfortable) as well as some sparsely texted sms messages. So I check snapchat, still can't find any recents from anyone. Then I get the idea to check for who viewed her snapchat stories and I saw the guys name. Open up the chat and everything is deleted besides a single picture of him.
Feeling betrayed, I ask her about it, and she starts crying saying "nothing happened", "we are just friends" then I ask her if she also deleted sms messages and she said "Yes". When I asked why she deleted all of the snapchat and sms messages she said "because I was worried you'd react like this". (I asked as calmly as one could ask, never raised my voice, and felt overall it wasn't an awful reaction).
I asked her if there was anything else and she said "no". I told her I didn't believe her then she swore on our cat. Believing her I kinda of avoided her for a day while I thought about it, then my friend showed me how to recover apple sms messages. I did that and noticed that within those messages, on multiple occasions, she went out with him for food as well as to a school event (that she specifically told me she took one of her girlfriends to). Bringing this up, she started crying again, "I promise that is it", "I swear", "we are just friends, we didn't do anything".
I have no proof of physical cheating, though I can't see snapchat (which it appears they use) but based off of everything else it seems like emotional cheating.
Not sure what to do. This really hit me hard, lied, and misled me. Any advice is welcomed.
Tldr; she talks to a dude despite me telling her it made me feel uncomfortable, and then she hides it from me.
Edit: She also told me that she was "waiting to tell me" all of this stuff.
Edit: Something that I also want to add here, the day when I got home from my work trip, she gave me a long speech about how she wants me to be romantic. Not sure what this meant, I feel like I am fairly romantic, I take her out to nice dinners, treat her well, hang out all the time, actually wasn't sure what this meant. Can assume this has something to do with it.

​

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      3. Each promotion is limited to one per player, family, address, credit card number, and shared computers (such as those in libraries, workplaces, schools, etc.) unless the casino management has granted prior approval. Verification of a player's identity might involve several forms of identification, including name, mailing address, e-mail, IP address, and credit card number.
      4. The casino, or its authorized agent, reserves the right to limit the number of bonuses given to any single participant in cases where multiple participation is permitted.
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      6. Deposit bonuses are strictly for wagering purposes and cannot be withdrawn.
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      8. Reversed cash-in amounts cannot be used to claim bonuses.
      9. Before claiming any coupon, your User Account balance must be below $1.
      10. You must play through your current deposit, bonus, or free promotion before making a new deposit or claiming a bonus or free promotion. Your balance must fall below $1 before you can deposit or claim another bonus or free promotion.
      11. A minimum deposit of $10 is required to be eligible for any free promotion unless specified otherwise in the promotion.
      12. Previous balances in your User Account cannot be used to meet wagering requirements.
      13. Withdrawals cannot be made for amounts lesser than the bonus.
      14. Upon requesting a withdrawal, any amount up to the equivalent value of the deposit bonus will be deducted from your balance or winnings before settlement. This means if you deposit $500, get a $250 bonus, and meet all wagering requirements, a withdrawal request should be made for an amount less than the bonus received.
      15. Any winnings from games like 777 slot, baccarat, craps, pontoon blackjack, roulette, sic bo, or any Live Dealer games will be withheld if the bonus was wagered on these games. This applies to any amount exceeding your original deposit.
      16. The casino provides bonuses to encourage players. However, they aren't meant for "bonus hunters" or "bonus abusers". Accounts will be reviewed, and any account deemed as a "bonus hunter" or "bonus abuser" will have future bonuses and promotions restricted.
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      20. Tournaments, Progressive Games, 777 slot or any Live Dealer games cannot be played with casino bonuses unless stated otherwise.
      21. All disputes will be resolved by the Casino's decision, which will be considered final.
      22. Once a bonus is claimed, its terms become immediately effective and remain so until a new deposit or bonus is processed, and after the bonus has been cleared from your balance. This also applies if your playable balance falls below $1, or if you deposit on top of your existing bonus balance. Any violations of the terms may result in all winnings being voided.
      23. Please note that all minimum deposit amounts are set in USD (United States Dollar). You must check the cashier for the minimum amount required in your currency before making your deposit.
      24. Only one free promotion may be redeemed between deposit-free bonuses.
      25. No consecutive payouts are allowed from free promotions without making a deposit in between.
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      27. All coupon codes have an expiration date. Ensure you use the coupon code before it expires. All coupons have a 7-day expiration date from the day they are redeemed.
   2. New User Welcome Bonus
      1. The stipulations described here govern the complimentary welcome bonus for new users established upon the inauguration of a fresh user account:
      2. Should you receive a bonus not contingent on deposit (free chips), a wager 30x the free chip's value is requisite.
      3. A single free chip is accredited per individual, family, household address, email address, credit card number, and both individual and communal computing systems (such as a university, fraternity, school, public library, or workplace).
      4. If you've previously capitalized on any Welcome Bonus, subsequent Welcome Bonuses are not accessible to you.
      5. To proceed with any withdrawal from the New Signup Bonus, a verification deposit is essential. Failure to make this verification deposit within 7 days from receiving the New Signup Bonus will result in the forfeiture of all winnings and bonus amount without pre-notice.
   3. Procedure for Cashing in a Coupon:
      1. Sign into your User Account
      2. Select the CASHIER option
      3. Choose REDEEM COUPON
      4. Input the coupon code in the provided rectangular window and select REDEEM.
      5. Click on DEPOSIT.
      6. Your bonus and deposit will be credited to your User Account.
   4. Standard Deposit Coupon Regulations
      1. To cash out wins from a deposit bonus, a Player must bet the deposit plus the bonus amount 15 times, unless otherwise stated (wagers on 777, baccarat, craps, pontoon blackjack, roulette, sic bo or any Live Dealer games are excluded). For instance, with a $300 deposit and a bonus of $100, you are required to wager an aggregate of $10.000 (excluding wagers on 777, baccarat, craps, pontoon blackjack, roulette, sic bo, or any live dealer game) to initiate a withdrawal.
      2. Every coupon code may be applied to a single deposit. More than one coupon code per deposit is not permissible.
      3. Each coupon code can only be redeemed once. After a coupon has been utilized, it becomes void for the next redemption.
      4. All coupon codes come with an expiry date. Ensure to use the coupon code before it lapses. All coupons expire 7 days after being redeemed.
      5. Upon satisfying your wagering prerequisites, any surplus beyond your maximum cashout limit will be automatically deducted from your account.
   5. Standard Free Spin Coupon Guidelines
      1. You are obliged to wager 40x the value of the free spin winnings.
      2. You may withdraw a minimum of $50 and a maximum of $50 from free spin winnings unless stated otherwise in the promotion.
      3. Once your wagering requirements are met, any excess beyond your maximum cashout limit will automatically be deducted from your account.
      4. Every coupon code has an expiration date. It's important to use the coupon code before it becomes invalid. All coupons expire 7 days from the date they are redeemed.
   6. Standard Free Chip Bonus Protocols
      1. You are mandated to wager 20x the value of any free chip bonus, unless otherwise indicated in the promotion.
      2. You may withdraw a minimum of $50 and a maximum of 5x the value of the free chip bonus unless otherwise stated in the promotion.
      3. Upon meeting your wagering requirements, any remaining balance exceeding your maximum cashout limit will be automatically removed from your account.
      4. Each coupon code has a set expiration date. Be sure to use the coupon code before its expiry. All coupons are valid for 7 days from the date of redemption.
   7. Standard Complimentary Point Terms
      1. Complimentary Points, or "Comp Points," can be converted into real money at a rate of 100 Comp Points equating to $1. b. You must have amassed at least 100 points to be eligible for Comp Point redemption.
      2. If your playable balance is above $1, you are prohibited from redeeming Comp Points.
      3. Comp Points cannot be redeemed if you have a pending withdrawal.
      4. You cannot blend redeemed Comp Points with other deposit or coupon balances.
      5. The cashout limit for redeemed Comp Points is 25x the redeemed amount.
      6. Please note that you can redeem up to $20.00/2000 comp points a day unless otherwise is stated.
   8. Standard Terms for Instant Cashback
8. To request a cashback, your User Account balance must be less than $/€ 1.
9. You can redeem multiple cashback promotions unless you've been excluded from participating in bonus offers.
10. Any remaining balance after a cashback withdrawal will be deducted.
11. You must contact the Casino to claim your cashback.
12. Cashbacks cannot be applied to deposits older than 7 days.
13. Cashbacks are only applicable to lost deposits without bonus funds.
14. You can claim a cashback for deposits lost since your last withdrawal or cashback, whichever occurred most recently.
15. If you make a withdrawal from received cashback or any other free promotion, it won't be eligible for a new cashback. You need to cover the withdrawn amount with lost deposits before becoming eligible again.
16. Deposits used for wagering on restricted games (777 slot, baccarat, craps, pontoon blackjack, roulette, sic bo, or any Live Dealer games) are not eligible for cashback.
17. Cashback is reduced by half if you wager any amount on Blackjack or 21 games.
18. Any portion of a bonus-free deposit used to enter a tournament (Buy-in, Add-on, or Re-Buy) will be subtracted from the qualifying amount for cashback.
19. Deposits used for transferring funds to Live Dealer games are ineligible for cashback, irrespective of whether Live Dealer games were played.
    1. Terms for Players Excluded from Bonuses
       1. Should a player who is disqualified from bonuses participate and profit from promotions or money bonuses, they will be obstructed from doing so by the Casino's automated system.
       2. In cases where a player attempts to manipulate the system or engages in dishonest practices, they will face immediate suspension and forfeiture of all bonuses, winnings, and associated privileges.
    2. Bonus Collusion
       1. The Casino reserves the right to suspend your account, pending an investigation, should there be reasonable grounds to suspect involvement in any form of collusion, syndication, or fraud during your interaction with the casino platform, website, and/or systems.
       2. We also reserve the right to withhold part or all of your account balance, terminate your account permanently, and recover from your account the sum of any winnings, pay-outs, or bonuses that have been influenced by any of the following activities:
       3. Collusion: The concerted effort of two or more individuals aiming to gain an unjust edge over the software and other players by pooling funds, thereby artificially increasing available bankroll through multiple bonus awards. This behavior seeks to maximize the probability of significant slot winnings while ensuring the pay-out is distributed to one of the colluding members, compromising the winning potential of other players at the casino.
       4. Syndication: It comes to our notice that you belong to or form part of a syndicate, club, or group where players are given strategies for advantage play to create positive expectancy scenarios via promotional offers.
       5. Exploitation of a fault, loophole, or error in our software or any third-party software provided for the services under this agreement.
       6. We learn that you have been found guilty of fraudulent or collusive behavior at another online gaming business, which includes charge-backs, collusion, or criminal activities.
       7. We find out that you have made fraudulent charge-backs, denied transfers, deposits, and purchases to your account.
       8. Use of automated play software such as 'bots' or any type of simulation tools or systems designed to provide an unfair advantage over the casino.
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       10. As a player at this Casino, you agree not to collude or attempt to collude or intend to be part of, directly or indirectly, a collusion scheme that involves sharing winnings between selected players, sharing funds, or working towards a mutual end goal while benefiting from multiple acquisition incentive offers to the detriment of other players not involved in the collusion. You also agree to inform the Casino if you suspect a player is colluding or planning to collude with other players. You further agree that you are not part of a syndicate or group engaging in advantage play strategies.
       11. We will thoroughly investigate any case where we suspect fraudulent activity, collusion, syndication, or illegal activity. We also reserve the right to inform our business units, processing companies, electronic payment providers, or other financial institutions we use, about your identity and any suspected unlawful, fraudulent, or improper activity.
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I accidentally deleted a really important message/sms and I can't seem to recover it. Any ways to recover it? I really need this message.

In the fiercely competitive realm of retail, surpassing rivals demands more than just quality products; it requires engaging with customers through personalized, innovative marketing tactics. VenueBoost stands out as a pivotal tool in this landscape, offering cutting-edge marketing automation features designed to enhance your marketing efforts efficiently and effectively. This expanded guide delves deeper into the benefits of marketing automation and introduces detailed examples and strategies for leveraging VenueBoost's capabilities to maximize your retail performance.

Understanding Marketing Automation

What is Marketing Automation?

Marketing automation refers to the technology that manages marketing processes and multifunctional campaigns across multiple channels automatically. By leveraging artificial intelligence and machine learning, it allows businesses to target customers with automated messages across email, web, social, and text, dynamically responding to customer interactions.

Key Components:

• Email Campaigns: Automate customer communication through trigger-based emails tailored to individual actions.
• Social Media Management: Schedule posts, analyze interactions, and engage users without manual effort.
• Keep Meticulous Records: Use customer data to place highly relevant advertisements across different platforms.

Comprehensive Benefits of Marketing Automation for Retailers

1. Personalized Shopping Experiences:

• Deep Dive: Utilize advanced data analytics to understand customer preferences and behavior. Implement dynamic content in emails and on websites to reflect individual customer profiles.
• Example: A customer who frequently buys children's clothing might receive automated emails showcasing new arrivals for kids, along with a personalized discount.

2. Increased Productivity:

• Workflow Automation: Introduce bots and AI to handle routine inquiries, freeing up staff to focus on high-level strategy and customer service.
• Impact Study: A case study where automation reduced the time spent on campaign setups by 50%, doubling the campaigns executed without additional staff.

3. Enhanced Customer Loyalty:

• Loyalty Programs: Automated loyalty programs that reward repeat customers with points, discounts, and exclusive offers.
• Success Story: Highlight how a retailer increased repeat customer visits by 30% year-over-year through a customized loyalty program.

4. Improved ROI:

• Analytics and Reporting: Use VenueBoost’s detailed analytics to track campaign performance and customer engagement, helping refine strategies and maximize impact.
• ROI Improvement: Demonstrate with real-life metrics how optimizing marketing spend based on analytics insights increased overall profitability by 25%.

How VenueBoost Elevates Marketing Automation

Email Marketing:

• Feature Insight: Explore the benefits of advanced segmentation and A/B testing to enhance email campaign effectiveness.

Text Message Marketing:

• Strategy Highlight: Discuss how instant, personalized text messages can drive immediate sales and enhance the customer experience.

Social Media Synergy:

• Integration Capabilities: Explain how syncing VenueBoost with social media platforms can increase your reach and foster real-time engagement.

Customer Segmentation and Cart Recovery:

• Tactical Overview: Provide a step-by-step guide on how to use these features to not only recover lost sales but also prevent cart abandonment.

Loyalty Program Automation:

• Program Examples: Detail successful loyalty program models that have led to significant increases in customer retention rates.

Getting Started with VenueBoost: A Step-by-Step Listicle

1. Register with VenueBoost

• Action: Visit the VenueBoost website and choose the right subscription package.

2. Integrate Your Platforms

• Action: Connect VenueBoost with your existing systems for seamless automation.

3. Segment Your Audience

• Action: Classify customers into groups to enhance targeted marketing.

4. Design Your Campaigns

• Action: Use VenueBoost to set up customized email, SMS, and social media campaigns.

5. Monitor and Adjust

• Action: Utilize VenueBoost’s analytics to refine your marketing strategies continually.

Adopting marketing automation with VenueBoost not only simplifies your marketing tasks but also enhances customer interactions and boosts store performance. Sign up today to transform your retail marketing strategy!
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Here’s a brief rant about my escapades when it comes to my love life. Feel free to share yours, dog on mine etc. Let’s begin.
Part 1 : The yapper who wrecked me
For as long as I can remember I used to be a very timid kid in school, not that extroverted but I did have heart. I used to be really good at speeches, played a bit of sport, won a couple of trophies, was good at my studies too. This is where when I was in my 11th grade I was approached by a girl for the first ever time in my life . Don’t judge me but I was straight ass so my first instinct was to turn her down and move on with my life. But unironically we caught the same bus home everyday and we started talking which slowly developed into something beautiful.
This goes on for about 8-9 months and that’s when the first antagonist steps into the picture, her father. He catches us walking together and whisks her by the arm, yells at me and takes her home and initiates his most diabolical plan yet : A 3 hour yap session to convince her that I’ll be the death of her.
Next day comes and I’m waiting for her to hop on the bus as I usually save her a seat next to me. This girl straight up walks up to me and in front of everybody without hesitation says “ you are not good for my life because you’ll amount to nothing “, complains to the bus driver makes me give up my seat and gets me to stand all the way over the back. I tried talking to her during our lunch break but no luck, bro just totally aired me. I wanted to save my remaining self respect and went and cried in the bathroom for an hour before I went back to class.
Following that evening until I finished school, I had to deliberately catch the next bus because I couldn’t bear looking at her. This couldn’t have happened at the worst of timing as I had my final exams and luckily enough I did well to secure an application at a good college.
The last I heard of her was she moved back to her native or somewhere. This was a while ago so the max we could use to stay in touch was sms through our parents phones as we didn’t have phones ourselves.
Part 2: The dumpster fire
Time skip, I’m in college. I haven’t fully recovered from the previous breakup yet but was coping quite well. I said to myself screw being in a relationship, bros for life. And bros for life it was, I had the most must fun with the boys during the first semester, found my bearings and made some lifelong's who keep in touch with me still.
Second semester starts and my second heartbreaks leans her head into my life. Since the start of the second semester, I was constantly feeling everyday that someone was drilling a hole in the back of my head with their stare. Whenever I turn back to g check them, it was her looking so intently that she doesn't even bother breaking eye contact even when I turn around to look back at her. She was really pretty but I made a vow to myself so I just let her be, she wasn't doing anything wrong just staring and so I didn't think much of it.
I was an honour student and so was she, so we were called down at the principal's for a general chat about how we found the classes, subjects and the staff. Her name was alphabetically in front of mine so he went first in and finishes up and heads back to class. I go in next, have a hearty chat and finish up as well. As I am walking up the stairs to get to class though, that's when I see her waiting for me at the stairs. I gave her a smile and thought nothing was gonna happen and that's when she pulls me by my shirt and asks if she can talk to me. I wanted to diffuse the tension and told her we're classmates and we were bound to talk with each other at some point. This is when she admits that she kept staring at me because she thought that I reminded her of her dad. It was pretty weird but I said it was okay? and just walked off because I was kinda nervous and the nervousness made me awkward and I sort of sped walked back to class.
Few days go by, they decide to make a Whatsapp group of the class. I was pretty hesitant but I kind of stalked everyone's number and after 3 hours I sent the first "Hi". Immediately there's a ding and we start talking. We caught on like wildfire and spent hours texting which felt like only minutes, I am sure you can relate to this. We spoke and met up in class for like 3 months, shared lunch, used each other's pens and all the cute shit.
I still vividly remember this but there was as huge storm that hit our city and she lived pretty far away from me probably about 40kms (~25miles) and the storm was devastating, it uprooted so many trees, powerlines and cell phone towers. It was basically zero dark 30 for an entire week and I missed her like hell and she did too. I finally hear news from my neighbours that they were able to get some kind of reception from a place that was 10kms away. I without any hesitation, steal my dads bike and head to the place and see if I received any messages from her. With no surprise as soon as I turned on my mobile data, I received a total of 300+ messages just from her seeing if I was safe and doing alright.
I call her up immediately then and there and she picked up and we spoke for the first time. She confessed she was in love and I hesitant but surely told her I loved her as well. It was official we were boyfriend and girlfriend, word spread like wild fire and all the old mates who were interested in her, ganged up on me and we used to throw down almost everyday over a girl, which is embarrassing I know but game's the game. We hung out a lot, malls, movies, parks, beach, dinners you name it. We were in love and it was the most beautiful feeling yet one which I longed for after the heartbreak in school. Whenever she needed something I didn't even bother thinking of how it would affect me and she did the same. The reciprocation from each end was immaculate and we couldn't stay away from each other.
She always used to say that there was a vacant flat in her apartment and if I was there, we could meet everyday and stay together everyday. This will come in handy later but I digress for now.
Here's where it started to go downhill. Her friends catch wind of the matter and think that I wasn't allat and we should breakup since I didn't deserve a girl like her. In a moment of weakness after constant persuasion, she says she wants to breakup outta the blue. I was so confused and upset and I tried to understand why. She doesn't give me much to work with and blocks me in Whatsapp, ignored me in college and pretty much gave me looks that felt so alienating fuelled by her friends.
Her life is really tragic when it comes to her family but without going into much detail she's been someone who's really unsure of herself and gets easily pushed around by the people who love her. I was able to sympathise with her on this and helped her see that her decisions are far more important at the end of the day than what other people say.
We kind of broke up in the second year and couldn't talk much. One fine day I had enough of it and followed her on her way home and asked if she could talk with her. We went somewhere private and she bawls her eyes out hugging me and apologising for doing that to me and she only did it because of her friends and not of her own free will. I told her it was okay and I was ready to forgive her and take her back and we're back on with the relationship happily ever after.
Third year comes by and remember the flat I told you about? the one vacant? yeah, so I basically rented out the place without a couple of my friends and me and her we had the happiest days of our lives. But funny story before that, When me and my friends came to finalise moving in and the payment with the landlord, she invited us all to her house but really it was an invitation for me especially. What she failed to let me know was that her mother was home and I was scared shitless of her mum.
As a single mother, she was really protective of her kids and her daughter having a bf would not be ideal to her and so I was scared she was gonna tear me up into shreds. I go there and there is her mom, bang in the middle of the house waiting for us with some snacks some drinks. I was shitting my pants the entire time, barely making eye contact when answering questions. I felt like I was gonna spontaneously combust any minute and I wanted to gtfo there ASAP. but luckily that evening after I get home she texts me and says her mom actually thought I was very sweet and charming and of course that made my day.
So I move in, we go to college and come back together, I get really close to their family, she prepared me lunch almost everyday, we had fun, we studied together etc.
But this is the time period where we started fighting a lot, mostly pointless looking back at it now but we were going at each other quite a bit and as a result we would go on long pauses and this kind of ruined the relationship in general. What I came to know was most of the fights were instigated by her friends and not her but I never really confronted her friends. I move out of her apartment and back home in my final year and I used to drive all the way to college which was the same distance as her house from mine.
One fine day after our many fights, I try to patch up and nada, total silence. I tried talking to her in person but it was just shrugs or fast walking to avoid me. I stopped trying at some point on the account that I was in the relationship with her and not with her friends, I she values her friends opinions more than mine then I can see where her priorities lied and so I stopped.
But boy did I know that I was in for one of the most depressing aspects in my life. Took me 3 years to fully recover from it because I believed we had the perfect relationship and I had put in so much work that it would be indestructible but here I am writing about how it ended lol
Part 3: The train-wreck
I graduate from college with a distinction, join an amazing company just after two months and quickly join the ranks. It was in a different city and hence I had to rent out somewhere closer to the office meaning I had to stay alone. Evenings were really lonely and depressing and to be frank I wasn't coping really well, turned to alcohol, some internet mischief and stopped completely taking care of myself.
This in turn made me burn out at work and even though my throughput was ideally the same or better it took a toll on me mentally and physically. Couldn't sleep at night, ate like one meal a day etc, no will to have fun or hangout and just wanted to be on the bed or a grifter at night. It took me almost 8 months to realise that I was depressed and I wasn't doing myself any favours. I joined the gym again and started rekindling what were once lost joys like boxing, motorcycles and gardening.
A few months go by and I am in good shape physically but didn't do anything about the mental side of things. That's when the third love of my life comes in. She was a family friend of my uncle's, her dad my uncle used to work together and her dad was looking for marriage alliances for his daughter before he wanted to send her abroad for higher studies.
My uncle introduced me as a potential suitor and we went and met her family once. Spoke to her and kind of dug her vibe, got the feeling that she was a bit too naive and a daddy's girl and felt she was a bit emotionally immature and naive when it came to relationships.
I wasn't too keen about proceeding any further and informed them in the most respectful way possible that I wasn't ready to get married anytime soon. Her father naturally took offence and she for some reason was heartbroken and that gave me confirmation that I made the right call because If I went ahead and we fought then one, her dad would step in and two she will want to cry and never want to resolve things unless her dad got involved.
I go on with my life, work in Dubai for a bit. Had a think about my career and decided to study abroad and funnily enough due to covid it got delayed by a whole semester and yet I went to the same country before her where I still am. I begin my masters and it was pretty okay same as back home, studying and working to support myself.
I am in my second semester and I get a random text from a number that was not in my contacts. It was her and she informed me that she was coming into a different uni later that year. Didn't think much about it but I wanted to help her settle in and stuff because I know how isolating it can be moving to a different place. So she gets here, gets nicely settled and we sort of spark up what ended two years ago. By this time I was partially kind of recovered from my second break up and I wanted to move on. I worked hard and saved a lot of money to take her out and spend time with her, buy her things she wanted and just make her feel home and she confessed that she was heartbroken when I called off the engagement.
I tried to explain her the reason but she assured me that I had my reasons and she believes me. Days go by We hang out whenever we can, I teach her cooking, grew flowers which I gave her every time I went to visit her and so much more.
In an around the 3rd semester of mine, she confesses she had feeling for me and told me she would wait for my reply. I didn't want to bullshit her and told her I loved spending time but I don't view the same at this point in time. She took it in stride and told me she'll wait for me to open up and I told her there were no promises and told her to just focus on the present.
I'm in my 4th and final semester comes around and this is where it goes to dogs. I started liking her too and we kind of acknowledged it but I didn't outright say it but I was slowly falling for her. One fine day she calls me up on video one day and show me a bloodied arm. It was a deep slash and was bleeding like crazy. I quickly call her friend to rush her to a hospital as I lived almost an hour and a half away. I get to the hospital and there she was stitched up and unconscious. The doctor says to me that her wound was infected and had to operate and remove the infect through incisions. They charged an arm and a leg and kind of pressured us into thinking it had to be done immediately. I had my savings and immediately paid it off and prompted to start the surgery. After 3 whole years of no contact, I call her father up and tell her the knows.
He was taken aback more about the fact that I called him than his daughter being in the hospital. Even on the phone he started probing as to how long we were talking with each other and shit and how she didn't tell him nothing about us being together. I felt like shit hit the fan then and there and was ready to just face whatever is gonna come my way. He was furious that I paid for everything and took care of her and stuff and said he'll send his wife and son (her younger brother) on the next jet which supposedly will get them here in 2 days time.
I really hated that phone call but in my mind her health was kinda important so after the surgery I just slept next to her on chair, go her food, fruits and everything and after a whole day she wakes up but I don't tell her what happened with her dad as she was not fully in her senses yet. I even offered to pick her mom and brother from the airport but they rejected it.
They get here, hop on cab and reach the hospital and don't even say a lousy thank you and pay me in cash and told me my presence was no longer needed there. But before I got there, I wrote here a note giving her a run down of events and asked her to cal me when she could. I leave, I go back to my place and wait. After two days, I received a call from her saying she was gonna go back home on a break in a couple days and asked if I could come see her tomorrow.
They were in a hotel and I get there at a time and place we decided on. I being her my flowers as usual and I give it to her and her midget of a brother, this 5ft nothing guy comes up to me and no warning just slaps me. I assured him that if he ever did something like that again, the hospital bills would be the least of his worries and I'm letting him go because of his sister. She lashed out on him and he went back crying to his mom, who comes down drags her back to the hotel room and doesn't even acknowledge my presence. She signalled to me to back home and she did not want me to wait there for her. But I was tired already of all the shit and just caught a bench and sat there for a bit. She looks down from her balcony and begs me to leave and I just stare at her for bit and head back.
Later that evening, I am put on a 4 way conference call between me, her, the mom and the dad. They just blasted me for spending time with their daughter and distracting her from studying all those kinda jazz. I patiently listened to finish them talking and spoke up. I told her that we are two consenting adults and we like each other and love spending time in each others company. We did not overstep our bounds and utmost held hands and told him that I know I said no before but my hearts changed thanks to your daughter and in order to re-enforce that we were interested I wanted her to pitch in and kind of passed on the torch to her saying you can ask your daughter too if she has the same feeling.
But I was for a shock of my life, she just was there silent, didn't say yes and didn't say no and made me look like a complete fool. So yeah, his father had what he wanted and basically just warned me not to pursue his daughter anymore. I had to swallow my pride and gave him my word and assured him I wouldn't contact her again. It was indeed a huge blow and yeah kind of spiralled in classes for a week.
A few weeks go by and she calls me again, I reluctantly pick up and talk and as if nothing happened she starting giving me her itinerary on when she's coming back and everything. I told her straight that, you have some balls telling this to me and top of it you act as if nothing happened. I told her I needed her during that call and not now and if she wasn't gonna stand for what's her then I most definitely couldn't stand with her. I kind of ended things then and there. She tried to contact me a couple of times but I didn't budge so far.
I graduated by the end of last year and she'll be graduating mid this year. Haven't been in contact for a total of 6-7 months.
Part 4 : That one dance scene from pulp fiction I graduate with a masters degree full re-invigorated and ready for my next challenge. Was able to land a job in a space on one month and still heart broken I pushed through, taking care of myself along the way had some breathing room because it wasn't like McDonald's pay and finally started enjoying life in the country.
We usually go to Starbucks to grab coffee but I just go along with my team even though I don't drink coffee. One fine day a month into the job, we had a really important client meeting that was coming up and we had to rush to get those lattes. I went and sat in one of the benches overlooking the street and that's when my fourth and final fling came through.
She was a flight attendant from Northern Africa and was desperately in need of an iPhone charger. She reluctantly came up to me and ask for mine and I obliged. I told her she could have the charger to herself because I was running later and I can get myself a new one. But she was pretty adamant that she'll drop by my office and return it in person. I gave her the details and dip and as promised she comes during lunch to hand my charger over. She asked me if I was free after work since she wanted to return the favour which I told her wasn't necessary but she was pretty insistent and so I budged.
I asked her if she could meet me at the same Starbucks after work. We met and we sort kicked off and we exchanged snapchats and went from there. She informed me she's was on break and was not in the city and hasn't been around much. We went out coffee, lunches and basically took her around the city. The first moth was pretty chill it was really casual at least from my end but I loved her energy and she could keep the conversation going for hours and genuinely wanted to know me so I just went with the flow.
Second month got a lot more intense and that's when the love bombing started. She showered me with so many compliments and how much she loved me and everything. It was really different and given her perspicacity I felt like it was authentic and gave in as well. We confessed our feelings before the end of the second month and we were in love.
Third month is the conclusion to this whole debacle. One of the many rules of the relationship was that I shouldn't drink alcohol because she was muslim. So I avoided alcohol for a whole two months since we started talking. Like I wanted to drop the vice since I didn't really enjoy it in the first place and only picked up a bottle or two just to fit in. But unfortunately I was working late at the office and they ordered some pizzas and vodka cruisers.
I wasn't very aware and had close to 3 cruisers and took one for home. I reach home finish the remaining cruiser and that's when I realise I screwed up and I did not want to hide this from her really cuz that's not the kind of guy I am. She was indeed overtly upset, ghosted me for days together, nonchalant replies and overall it sucked.
I tried so hard to get a conversation going and said I felt being honest was important so that something like this doesn't happen again and after a huge back and forth she finally forgave me. Things went back to normal we were having fun as usual and it was one of the best days of my life. During the last week of the month, she goes really cold and straight up avoids me and my calls. No replies whatsoever and even if she did she'd day things like " I have nothing to talk to you " , " you're free to do what ever you want " etc.
Didn't quite make sense to me but I tried my best to save whatever this was from but ultimately I failed. The last ever words of her to me was. " I lied to you. I never loved you in the first place, stop wasting my time and yours. You're fool for falling in love with me " after this I had clear confirmation I needed to stop so I wished her the best and said I'll be here for her if she ever wants to change her mind and give me closure and just like the title it was brief but really intense lol.
To this day I don't understand why that ended and I Have been single for almost a month and a half now.
P.S : I understand, I haven't been really emotionally intelligent on multiple instances and I should have ended things a lot sooner if I wasn't carried away by all the things happening. I just wanted to share these experiences as I have been bottling them up. Thank you for reading so far. Have an amazing day!
Edit : Formatting and spelling.

If the background info to my past is too much, feel free to scroll down straight to my question :)

• BACKGROUND -

Male, 25.
So my childhood had been rough. My mom was abusive (emotionally and physically). And neglective. I never paid much mind to this time of my life. But by what I learned recently, this probably is the reason why I have high anxiety and am hypersensitive. When I moved to my dad with 10, I did not have friends at school for years. Later, I had 1 friend who I loved. I am a very loyal person. But he only wanted to be friends with me cause everyone else in class turned against him, and I was the only one that was not treating him like shit. To him, I was not cool enough to hang out with after school though. Only good enough to play video games and listen to his struggles he trusted nobody else with to open up about. With girls, it also ended sad always. Later, when I was 16 or 17, my stepmom developed burnout and then psychosis, and when she was back at home on meds, she attacked me daily, and my dad sided with her. When I did not attend school anymore, I got told how much of a disappointment I am and was put under constant critizism and pressure. I was never told I was loved or somebody is proud of me. Positive outcomes at school were left uncommented, disappointments were voiced clearly against me with critizism and sometimes rage. I was also never allowed to express anger or resentment.
I started making music when I was 16. After school, I went to a school to learn music production. I met a guy there who said he saw talent in me and had a music studio, and who also made rap music. We bonded, and I moved in with him. To cut it short, I name only a few things that happened during the next 3 years. First year was living with him and his girlfriend that abused her children. I was not allowed to say anything, cause my best friend said he depended financially on her. There was constant screaming, and also dirt, mold, maggots. When I grew depressive after 1 year, I moved to a new apartment. 2 days later my mom died. It was okay, she was not nice to me. She developed psychosis also shortly after I left her at 10. I had to visit her, but never wanted. I lived at the new apartment mostly alone. My friend stayed with his girlfriend. He came every 2 days. We built a music studio into the new apartment. I am very creative by nature and hypersensitive. I made music where I put pure emotions in. Maybe it was even therapy. I cried during many songs.
Half a year in, I started dating a girl. It was weird. I could not tell if I had feelings. But I started crying uncontrollably sometimes when I was alone. Also after the first time I met her. I reasoned, that my low feeling of self worth could not comprehend how such a beautiful person would or could want me. I continued meeting her. But I was confused to what was going on inside of me, and what I felt towards her. It made my mind go in circles, until I got worse and worse and worse, and I developed a derealization. To not endanger the possible relationship, I kept the girl at distance. To gain time to figure out what is wrong with me and work on it. I was worried, she would stop dating me if I could not hide my problems from her anymore. But also go, if I keep her at too much distance. This ended up in her become nasty towards me. And my former friend told me I was all at fault, and also got closer and closer to her. At the end, just days after I recovered from the derealization, he left his girlfriend with the 2 kids out of the blue, moved in with the girl I dated into my apartment, and slept with her just one floor below me. This ended in me writing a sort-of-goodbye-letter, and cutting my wrist in the basement. When I figured out dying or loosing much blood is not as easy and painless as expected, I gave up. After hours on the basement floor. The most fucked up thing, when I continued suffering, that everybody told me I was selfish and in between their love. After some time, I moved back with my parents.
Months later, he got in contact with me again. He apologised and said he is single again. He wanted to talk. He said he was a broken man, wronged me badly, is scared to commit suicide, and we could continue to work on my music. I lost all my songs when I left him. I got weak and moved back in with hm. He then rented a VERY broken house in some very very very rural area to move in together. I grew dependent on him not only emotionally, but also to get from A to B with his car, and also financially, and for me to make music. It took not long after until he turned toxic again. And until I started to accumulate debts that he made on my name. He was doing push and pull with me emotionally, dependent on whether I acted the way he liked or not. And once he fell in love with a woman again, I was totally abandoned. I remember multiple moments. Crying my eyeballs out for hours in an empty bathtub, ordering sleeping pills but then scaring away, and holding a knife in front of myself, stabbing onto the skin surface multiple times, and then crying and putting it away, horrified of myself. And one time when I got dumped by a girl I fell madly in love with, he withdrew again from me and left me alone with my feelings. I was alone inside of a room that had a ripped open ceiling, with only a matrace on the floor. I remember hearing a clicking inside the walls, and the boiler inside the basement in intervals. I was close to going insane. So I just grabbed my jacket at midnight, went out into the rain, and followed the road somewhere. I had no clue where I was going. But I did not know what to do with my emotions anymore. I ended up on a hill inside some forest. I cried in the rain, and thought of jumping somewhere. Then my friend asked for my location. He sent me pictures cutting his arm with a combat knife and ordering me to tell him where I was. When I did, he pulled up with his car and a baseball bat. I fell onto my knees and told him he can go ahead and kill me. I even begged him. Somehow we resolved it though.
It took not long, until he abandoned me completely, and wanted to force me into a contract for him to get percentages of my future income from music. He also disallowed me to use the music studio. To this point, music was the only thing that kept me mentally alive. I converted all my pain. It gave all my suffering a sense of purpose, and I imagined one day helping other people overcome similar pain when they listen to it. At the peak of my suffering, I remember waking up from a nightmare (I used to have nightmares since I was small, 9/10 dreams, always super brutal), realizing that I was me and inside the house, and I wished to just fall asleep again and be inside the nightmare. I did not have the power anymore to leave the matrace. I was cut off, alone, in this part of the house, where 3/4 heaters were broken and without furniture. I grew some psychosomatic pain in my chest, and it became so unbearable, I knew I could no longer make it another day. I would kill myself or end up in a psych ward. Parallely, a friend of mine made me aware to the fact, that I could had have a friendship with a narcissist all this time and was just used and gaslighted. When I watched a YouTube video about narcissism, 9/10 points mentioned fit my friend. So I called my parents, broke down in tears, told them I was lying all the time when they called me and asked how I was, and begged them to come pick me up. I cried waterfalls and said, that I am so bad, that if there was a button I could just press and I stopped existing, I would push it in an instant. But committing suicide is not as easy, quick and painless as often believed.
After I left my former friend, it took not long until he sued me for using his music studio, claiming it had always been the deal between us that I would have to pay later. Not to share it as a friend, but commercially. He wanted me to pay 63.000€. Also, he claimed that my music was his own property, and wanted me to delete every song. He also threatened to harm me via WhatsApp, anonymously via SMS in third person, and sent me a threat through my own lawyer. Even during our friendship he often told me, would I ever leave or betray him, he would break my kneecaps. And that he knows gangster families. He is much older than me by the way. I ended up with many thousands of euros debts that he made over me, a court case, and constant fear, that one day I would be tortured or killed. I also could not make music anymore, which was the worst. Also on one occasion, I was followed by a store detective, who later confronted me, thinking I stole something. I was convinced it was somebody to obduct and harm me. I did not freeze in the moment, but after the occasion, I completely broke down.
- THE PROBLEM & QUESTION <---
All in all, I suffered for months on end great emotional pain, fear and despair. Until one day, I stopped feeling any emotion whatsoever. I lost my IMMENSE empathy and emotionality. I also lost my sense of self. This went for 1 1/2 years. Then I switched countries. The court case continues though. I started studying psychology. Though I felt like my brain worked not as I wanted it to. I then did some research on trauma, and watched lots of videos of Dr. K. He mentioned EFT Tapping. As it is something my CBT therapist (that I have for over a year) also recommended, I tried it. I was emotionally numb, but focused on some tiny weird feeling in my sola plexus I had every morning after waking up. I ended up crying for nearly an hour like there was no tomorrow.
After the emotional release, all of a sudden, everything was normal again. I could smell, hear taste and feel intensely again. I was full of energy. I smiled at people without forcing, and felt joy. Colors were more intense, and I was empathetic. I looked into the mirror and found myself nice again. I was positive and life was just BEAUTIFUL. This was 6 months ago...
It lasted for 2 days. Then I was stressed, because I was late for university. What I noticed when I arrived...I was completely shut down again. After that followed a few weird days. There my vision was super messed up. I could not think clearly. I felt super disconnected with everything. Somebody touched me, and I startled, and the place where the hand touched was burning. Now for months, I have problems with thinking and vision and more. Emotional numbness anyway. I was a bit back in my body again twice or thrice since, but ended up with cold showers, burning sensation inside, etc. Also constant neck and face tension and more. Often, I have very very dark thoughts towards life.
I tried Trauma Release Exercises (TRE), Meditation, Yoga, Kinesiology, CBT, Acupuncture, Meditation, Massage, Breathing, Grounding, Sound Therapy (SSP), EMDR, maybe more. I am a bit desperate to how to reconnect with my emotions and body permanently. And how to not have my body and brain act like it is a bugged video game. I miss the old me.
Any tips?
A personal dream would btw be to partake in a viewer interview.

World War I[j] or the First World War (28 July 1914 – 11 November 1918) was a global conflict between two coalitions: the Allies and the Central Powers. Fighting took place throughout Europe, the Middle East, Africa, the Pacific, and parts of Asia. One of the deadliest wars in history, it resulted in an estimated 9 million soldiers dead and 23 million wounded, plus up to 8 million civilian deaths from numerous causes including genocide. The movement of large numbers of troops and civilians during the war was a major factor in spreading the 1918 Spanish flu pandemic. Increasing diplomatic tensions between the European great powers reached a breaking point on 28 June 1914, when a Bosnian Serb named Gavrilo Princip assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand, heir to the Austro-Hungarian throne. Austria-Hungary held Serbia responsible, and declared war on 28 July. Russia came to Serbia's defence, and by 4 August, Germany, France, and Britain were drawn into the war, with the Ottoman Empire joining in November of the same year. Germany's strategy in 1914 was to first defeat France, then transfer forces to the Russian front. However, this failed, and by the end of 1914, the Western Front consisted of a continuous line of trenches stretching from the English Channel to Switzerland. The Eastern Front was more dynamic, but neither side could gain a decisive advantage, despite costly offensives. As the war expanded to more fronts, Bulgaria, Italy, Romania, Greece and others joined in from 1915 onward. In early 1917, the United States entered the war on the Allies' side, and later the same year, the Bolsheviks seized power in the Russian October Revolution, making peace with the Central Powers in early 1918. Germany launched an offensive in the west in March 1918, and despite initial successes, it left the German Army exhausted and demoralised. A successful Allied counter-offensive later that year caused a collapse of the German frontline. By the end of 1918, Bulgaria, the Ottoman Empire and Austria-Hungary agreed to armistices with the Allies, leaving Germany isolated. Facing revolution at home and with his army on the verge of mutiny, Kaiser Wilhelm II abdicated on 9 November. The fighting ended with the Armistice of 11 November 1918, while the subsequent Paris Peace Conference imposed various settlements on the defeated powers, notably the Treaty of Versailles. The dissolution of the Russian, German, Austro-Hungarian, and Ottoman Empires resulted in the creation of new independent states, including Poland, Finland, Czechoslovakia, and Yugoslavia. The inability to manage post-war instability contributed to the outbreak of World War II in September 1939. Names The first recorded use of the term First World War was in September 1914 by German biologist and philosopher Ernst Haeckel who stated, "There is no doubt that the course and character of the feared 'European War' ... will become the first world war in the full sense of the word."[1] It was later used as a title for his 1920 memoirs by Lt-Col. Charles à Court Repington. Before World War II, the events of 1914–1918 were generally known as the Great War or simply the World War.[2] In August 1914, the magazine The Independent wrote "This is the Great War. It names itself".[3] In October 1914, the Canadian magazine Maclean's similarly wrote, "Some wars name themselves. This is the Great War."[4] Contemporary Europeans also referred to it as "the war to end war" and it was also described as "the war to end all wars" due to their perception of its unparalleled scale, devastation, and loss of life.[5] Background Main article: Causes of World War I Political and military alliances Map of Europe focusing on Austria-Hungary and marking the central location of ethnic groups in it including Slovaks, Czechs, Slovenes, Croats, Serbs, Romanians, Ukrainians, Poles. Rival military coalitions in 1914:[k] Triple Entente Triple Alliance For much of the 19th century, the major European powers maintained a tenuous balance of power, known as the Concert of Europe.[6] After 1848, this was challenged by Britain's withdrawal into so-called splendid isolation, the decline of the Ottoman Empire, New Imperialism, and the rise of Prussia under Otto von Bismarck. The 1866 Austro-Prussian War established Prussian hegemony in German states, while victory in the 1870–1871 Franco-Prussian War allowed Bismarck to consolidate a German Empire under Prussian leadership. Avenging the defeat of 1871, or revanchism, and recovering the provinces of Alsace-Lorraine became an obsession of French policy and public opinion for the following few years,[7] yet since the 1880s this concern was eclipsed by the conquest of a vast colonial empire, and had disappeared from the programs of all French political parties as utterly unrealistic.[8]
World empires and colonies around 1914 To isolate France and avoid a war on two fronts, Bismarck negotiated the League of the Three Emperors between Austria-Hungary, Russia and Germany. After Russian victory in the 1877–1878 Russo-Turkish War, the League was dissolved due to Austrian concerns over Russian influence in the Balkans, an area they considered to be of vital strategic interest. Germany and Austria-Hungary then formed the 1879 Dual Alliance, which became the Triple Alliance when Italy joined in 1882.[9] For Bismarck, the purpose of these agreements was to isolate France by ensuring the three Empires resolve any disputes between themselves; when this was threatened in 1880 by British and French attempts to negotiate directly with Russia, he reformed the League in 1881, which was renewed in 1883 and 1885. After the agreement lapsed in 1887, he replaced it with the Reinsurance Treaty, a secret agreement between Germany and Russia to remain neutral if either were attacked by France or Austria-Hungary.[10] Bismarck viewed peace with Russia as the foundation of German foreign policy but after becoming Kaiser in 1890, Wilhelm II forced him to retire and was persuaded not to renew the Reinsurance Treaty by his new Chancellor, Leo von Caprivi.[11] This provided France an opportunity to counteract the Triple Alliance by signing the Franco-Russian Alliance in 1894, followed by the 1904 Entente Cordiale with Britain. The Triple Entente was completed by the 1907 Anglo-Russian Convention. While these were not formal alliances, by settling long-standing colonial disputes in Asia and Africa, the notion of British entry into any future conflict involving France or Russia became a possibility.[12] British and Russian support for France against Germany during the Agadir Crisis in 1911 reinforced their relationship, increasing Anglo-German estrangement.[13] Arms race
SMS Rheinland, a Nassau-class battleship, Germany's first response to the British Dreadnought German industrial strength and production had significantly increased after 1871, driven by the creation of a unified Reich, French indemnity payments, and the annexation of Alsace-Lorraine. Backed by Wilhelm II, Admiral Alfred von Tirpitz sought to use this growth in economic power to build a Kaiserliche Marine, or Imperial German Navy, which could compete with the British Royal Navy for naval supremacy.[14] His thinking was influenced by US naval strategist Alfred Thayer Mahan, who had argued that possession of a blue-water navy was vital for global power projection; Tirpitz had his books translated into German, while Wilhelm made them required reading for his advisors and senior military personnel.[15] However, it was also an emotional decision, driven by Wilhelm's simultaneous admiration for the Royal Navy and desire to surpass it. Bismarck thought that the British would not interfere in Europe, as long as its maritime supremacy remained secure, but his dismissal in 1890 led to a change in policy and an Anglo-German naval arms race began.[16] Despite the vast sums spent by Tirpitz, the launch of HMS Dreadnought in 1906 gave the British a technological advantage over their German rivals.[14] Ultimately, the race diverted huge resources into creating a German navy large enough to antagonise Britain, but not defeat it; in 1911, Chancellor Theobald von Bethmann Hollweg acknowledged defeat, leading to the Rüstungswende or 'armaments turning point', when he switched expenditure from the navy to the army.[17] This decision was not driven by a reduction in political tensions but by German concern over Russia's quick recovery from its defeat in the Russo-Japanese War and subsequent 1905 Russian Revolution that same year. Economic reforms, backed by French funding, led to a significant post-1908 expansion of railways and transportation infrastructure, particularly in its western border regions.[18] Since Germany and Austria-Hungary relied on faster mobilisation to compensate for their numerical inferiority compared to Russia, the threat posed by the closing of this gap was more important than competing with the Royal Navy. After Germany expanded its standing army by 170,000 troops in 1913, France extended compulsory military service from two to three years; similar measures were taken by the Balkan powers and Italy, which led to increased expenditure by the Ottomans and Austria-Hungary. Absolute figures are difficult to calculate due to differences in categorising expenditure since they often omit civilian infrastructure projects like railways which also had logistical importance and military use. It is known, however, that from 1908 to 1913, military spending by the six major European powers increased by over 50% in real terms.[19] Conflicts in the Balkans Photo of large white building with one sign saying "Moritz Schiller" and another in Arabic; in front is a cluster of people looking at a poster on the wall. Sarajevo citizens reading a poster with the proclamation of the Austrian annexation in 1908 The years before 1914 were marked by a series of crises in the Balkans, as other powers sought to benefit from the Ottoman decline. While Pan-Slavic and Orthodox Russia considered itself the protector of Serbia and other Slav states, they preferred the strategically vital Bosporus straits to be controlled by a weak Ottoman government, rather than an ambitious Slav power like Bulgaria. Since Russia had its ambitions in northeastern Anatolia, while their clients had overlapping claims in the Balkans, balancing these divided Russian policy-makers and added to regional instability.[20] Austrian statesmen viewed the Balkans as essential for the continued existence of their Empire and saw Serbian expansion as a direct threat. The 1908–1909 Bosnian Crisis began when Austria annexed the former Ottoman territory of Bosnia and Herzegovina, which it had occupied since 1878. Timed to coincide with the Bulgarian Declaration of Independence from the Ottoman Empire, this unilateral action was denounced by the European powers, but accepted as there was no consensus on how to resolve the situation. Some historians see this as a significant escalation, ending any chance of Austria cooperating with Russia in the Balkans, while also damaging diplomatic relations between Serbia and Italy, both of whom had their expansionist ambitions in the region.[21] Tensions increased after the 1911–1912 Italo-Turkish War demonstrated Ottoman weakness and led to the formation of the Balkan League, an alliance of Serbia, Bulgaria, Montenegro, and Greece.[22] The League quickly overran most of the Ottomans' territory in the Balkans during the 1912–1913 First Balkan War, much to the surprise of outside observers.[23] The Serbian capture of ports on the Adriatic resulted in partial Austrian mobilisation, starting on 21 November 1912, including units along the Russian border in Galicia. In a meeting the next day, the Russian government decided not to mobilise in response, unwilling to precipitate a war for which they were not as of yet prepared to handle.[24] The Great Powers sought to re-assert control through the 1913 Treaty of London, which had created an independent Albania while enlarging the territories of Bulgaria, Serbia, Montenegro and Greece. However, disputes between the victors sparked the 33-day Second Balkan War, when Bulgaria attacked Serbia and Greece on 16 June 1913; it was defeated, losing most of Macedonia to Serbia and Greece, and Southern Dobruja to Romania.[25] The result was that even countries which benefited from the Balkan Wars, such as Serbia and Greece, felt cheated of their "rightful gains", while for Austria it demonstrated the apparent indifference with which other powers viewed their concerns, including Germany.[26] This complex mix of resentment, nationalism and insecurity helps explain why the pre-1914 Balkans became known as the "powder keg of Europe".[27]

Although many of us (including me) will not agree with some of the hypothetical scenario's they offer, there is no doubt the authors of 'Still Lost In Panama' did a fantastic job in researching the case and as such the book is definitely worth reading by all who are interested in this case. With regards to the phone log data presented in the book, there are a few remarks, some of this is new, others were already known but have now been confirmed. I'll try to keep chronological order, with excuses for the long post.
1) When the iPhone looses its network connection as the girls move downhill on the north side of the Mirador (about halfway between the top and the first stream), the phone logs a signal strength of -94 db. Almost three hours later, when the girls make their first alarm call, once again a signal strength of -94 db is recorded. The next morning, during the 2nd call with the iPhone, the connection strength is noted as -113 db, which is the lowest the phone can measure and basically translates in 'no signal'. There has been a lot of discussion about this weird coincidence in the past (see earlier posts from me), as it seems to indicate the girls were at around 20 minutes walking from the Mirador when they made their first call. As I mentioned already to Annette during a conversation before the book was published, there are other explanations possible for this.
Latest info I received on this seems to indicate there is a bug in the iPhone4 logging, which keeps the phone logging the 'last known signal strength' (-94 db) even if there is actually no signal. It will only update when an actual signal is measured OR when the phone is reset, and indeed, the next morning, after the phone was switched off and then on again, it reports -113 db, no signal. I'm still waiting for someone with an iPhone4 to replicate this situation so we can solve this, but in the meantime the conclusion that the girls were within 20 minutes of the Mirador at the time of the first call is no longer set in stone. It is possible the iPhone4 simply continues to log the last known signal strength, even when there is in fact no signal.
The fact that Annette regains phone signal up on the paddocks is exactly conform my calculations, and the same was already mentioned/measured by others. This is however a feature of more modern phones (which can connect at much lower signal strength). The iPhone4 would most probably not have registered this signal as it never gets above the -113 db up on the paddocks. It is purely that modern phones have much better receivers and antenna's. Still, the often heard conclusion that there is totally no signal north of the Mirador is not true, as long as you are at the higher elevations with a modern phone, you can expect some signal but probably below the capacity of the iPhone4 to use.
2) The book mentions that the switch from 2G to 3G would slow down the connection time. This is not true. Switching from 2G to 3G makes absolutely no difference in this case (it is totally different with 4G and 5G, but that's for after 2014). The difference between 2G and 3G is only in the protocol used for internet access (3G is faster) but phonecalls and SMS as well as logging in remain completely unchanged and use the same frequencies. Once again, 4G and 5G is something totally different.
3) The final phone call(s) are very interesting, and I believe this requires further study. As I mentioned in my earlier post, the '112' number was not yet implemented with the local provider in April 2014, which means that instead of linking this to a 911 number, the local provider would simply reject the call as being an unknown number. So, all '112' calls with both phones were doomed to fail, even IF they would manage to connect (which they did not). They could have called 112 in the middle of Boquete and it would still not have connected them to the 911 post. (Nowadays, that is different, but in April 2014 this was not yet implemented). So, we can disregard all 112 calls, which leaves only a few 911 calls. And there is more. The Samsung S3 from Lisanne had a KPN simcard, and sadly KPN had no contract with the local Panamese provider in 2014. That is why the iPhone logs into the network on top of the Mirador, but the S3 does not. Now, for all I can find, it seems the US/EU system which allows users without a contract (or simcard) to call the alarm number was not yet implemented in Boquette in April 2014. That means that the S3 could NOT call out, not even an alarm number. So all calls with the S3 were doomed to fail,no matter what number it called. They would never work no matter where the girls were! Only the iPhone could perhaps call out, provided it called the right number.
Now, if we take the above into account, we are left with just two phone calls which potentially could connect provided the girls were in range of a tower. (Every other calls would have been rejected even IF they were in range). That's the final calls, in the morning of April 3, when they call '911' (correct number) with the iPhone (correct phone). From all the calls they make, sadly this is the only time when they would have stood a chance, provided they were in range.
And, these two final calls are strange! They are made 03 April 09.32 hrs immediately after each other. Really immediately, perhaps within seconds but at least within a minute. Every other time, the girls take considerable time between phone calls (perhaps searching for a higher elevation, better signal, whatever). So, why would you call instantly again? And why would you do that during the only time when you call the right number with the right phone? Personally, if I would do such a thing, it would be because I 'hear something'. "Wait, it disconnected, but this time it was different!" Or perhaps, they heard a ringing?? Immediately calling again is the logical thing to do in such a situation! Once again, this was the only time when they called the right number with the right phone! If the authors wish to work on a second edition, I think there's an opening here! What about the rumor, circulating at the time, that there was one extremely short connection? (some state this was on April 18, which can't be, others say it was on April 2, but could it perhaps have been on April 3 at 09.32???) We know that out on the paddocks (and anywhere close to the Mirador) there is a signal, even though it might have been on the very limit of what the iPhone4 could handle. How good were the logs of the local provider searched? Could something have been missed here? Once again, why else would you instantly call again??
4) The pincode they stop entering on April 5 is the simcard pin, not the phone pin. Nowadays, nobody uses a simcard pin anymore, but in 2014 many Dutch sim cards still came with an separate pin code. Entering the correct pin unlocks the simcard. If no code is entered, the simcard is not unlocked, and the phone will not check for a signal or try to log into a network. Basically, it is in flight mode. So, when the girls stopped entering the sim pin code, they also were no longer able to see the signal strength (the screen will display 'no simcard' instead of showing a signal bar). Once again, they could have been in the middle of Boquete, but if you do not enter a simcard pin,the phone will never connect. The 'checks' the girls made after April 5 can not possibly have been signal checks, as they could not see the signal strength! I suspect the girls were checking the time. According LITJ (but not confirmed in SLIP) there were more than 70 'no pin' login's, almost all of them made before April 1, so it seems like Kris had a habit of not entering the sim pin code when all she wished to do was check the time (the girls were not wearing watches).
5) The only truly 'new' info I found in SLIP with regards to the phone logs is the mention that there was a lot of user action during the final time the phone was activated (on April 11). Now, on April 11, the iPhone was started at 10.51 local time. It should be noted that this is (almost) the same time which was used on April 4-6, so we are back in the old "schedule". Which to me indicates this was no 'accidental' activation (as has been mentioned by some) but a deliberate user action, almost certainly by the same person who used the phone earlier. But although the phone was (probably) instantly switched off all previous times, this time the phone remained on for just over an hour and was only switched off at or after 11.56 hrs. To me, this indicates that the person using the phone no longer cared about saving battery power. She knew it would be the last time she used the phone.
Based on this, in an earlier post, I already hypothesized that the final remaining girl (probably Kris) left the backpack behind on April 11 (perhaps because it became too heavy to carry in her weakened state), taking only the one missing water bottle with her. But off course, this is just a theory and we will never know.
What was not mentioned earlier however, is that SLIP reports a lot of user activity and the creation and changing of files during this one hour period. Changing files might revert to log files of the various applications, but creation of files is definitely new. Now, we have someone in a desperate situation, who probably realizes this is the last time she will use the phone, and she creates files?? We are always discussing the lack of 'farewell' messages, and now, in the very last time the phone is used, we find a user who keeps busy for one hour creating files! I can't help wondering whether the girls (or more likely the one surviving girl) was actually typing in a farewell message during that one hour of user activity??? There is no mention of a farewell message having been found on the iPhone, but perhaps it was somehow lost or never recovered (or deleted or deliberately kept out of the leaked files, although that is less likely). Also, it is possible she was typing the message in WhatsApp (the App the girls normally used for messages) and it has been confirmed that in 2014 WhatsApp did not retain unsent messages locally on the phone, so if you typed in a message in WhatsApp and it could not be sent on internet, the message would be lost as soon as you switched off the phone.... (this is different nowadays, but I'm talking about 2014) I fear this might very well be what happened: they typed in a final WhatsApp message as farewell on April 11, but without internet connection the message could not be send and the cached message was lost as soon as the phone power was switched off.
Perhaps there are IT wizards who, with all modern tools, could still recover such a message, but that would require access to the iPhone (or what remains of it), and I fear that's not something which is likely to happen.
TLDR: sorry for the long post.

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Woke up, went to check my email on my account which was 2FA AUTHENTICATED, RECOVERY EMAIL ENABLED, PHONE LINKED, TRUSTED DEVICES LINKED, OVER 7 YEARS USED, just to find out cant log in, password-box says in red [password changed 25 hrs ago] , cannot recover because the genius hacker has changed the recovery email to the same email, deleted my number too. great.
oh thats not all, i go to my phone to get the 8 digit backup codes, phone displays the codes. head over to try and input and guess what, google has officially removed that method. great. i go to twitter to try communicate with google, turns out its an AI bot, great, best it can do is link me to create another account. basically all my emails, drive, notes, all in the mercy of the hacker. great
i go to youtube to check, turns out it has happened to a big youtuber also, same script. hacked wit 2FA .i watch the video and those dreaded words are spoken, "they only helped me because im a big youtuber, i dunno about you guys"..
checks all the forums, all point to one answer>> your account is lost forever.
so im here wondering in less than 24 hrs, how did they pass the phone SMS code, recovery email, and sus activity checker?? SO ANYWAY.
thanks google. thanks alot

Hi everyone this is Narration of my sad life story. I was among the brightest students of my primary and secondary school;specially in maths and science .used to be topper in maths including all Olympiads.Even got into State level NSEJS and also an NTSE scholar (cleared two rounds) and cleared KVPY both rounds.
Senior secondary I enrolled in coaching cum schooling tie up program in bhubaneswar. Everything went good until second half of class twelve when suddenly the HOD Maths cum largest shareholder of our coaching decided he would make drastic changes on his own.
He drag us(group of us toppers) to useless extra classes which waste our time and exhaust us ,we also couldn't attend the cbse classes assigned to us but nobody in management dared to tell him because he was nearly owner of the coaching classes company.
Time went by I started loosing my temper my health couldn't complete the syllabus I realized that no matter what we can't complete the JEE Syllabus.I was in depression.From then onwards I started wasting my time because I was hopeless of securing a good rank in JEE and I was unsure of getting v good marks in cbse board.
Got a rank of 5k in jee adv and mains both and this was my worst performance in any national level exams. I had got my hands onto a smartphone for first time during the last months and the loneliness caused me to be addicted to it.
Got into an Old iit with no so good branch .
During the first year I was very afraid to talk to anyone because I feared ragging and Idk why I feared the peer pressure of marks and branch among my friends. By this time I was totally glued onto fb I didn't participate in any co curricular activities .I wasn't aware of anything in my surroundings in college.
Got a cgpa of 5.5(of 10) I was devastated by now when I realised in which state I was . I was lonely, depressed always crying subconsciously afraid to talk to anyone . By now I had also become very aggressively defensive of my bad habits. I didn't used to bad mouth my father but now I did.
I used to cry thinking about my life now.Everybody used to think he is an IITian what else does he need but nobody realises the pain of high aspirations and high expectations.
By the time of second year slowly I started opening up and slowly started talking to very few people. I started going to AI club sometimes gym sometimes used to play . I asked one of my friends to put me into the annual cultural fest(it is very famous in the state/ region of my college ) In the cult fest marketing team I learned many new things I started talking to more and people was less afraid of seniors I used to talk yo local businesses and national brands I slowly started recovering from my fear and always anxious nature.
And then voila covid happened and I again ended up with my parents who are very very bitter .I somehow managed to ignore them in childhood but now I couldn't; I felt caged . Everyday there would be conflicts and quarrel specially with my mom.My mental state was in shambles.
At this time I was even more glued to mobile and the most unfortunate thing was I was in a very remote area where 4g wasn't present in my area I used to receive faint 4g signals and sometimes for days there would be no internet. Because I couldn't connect with anyone I was isolated lonely and depressed. Time went by 2 years no contact with anyone couldn't get any guidance as I was already anxious and covid + internet made it worse.
In third year i didn't give the internship placement program because I feared both my ability and internet might give results that I might not be able to bear mentally.
4th year my college finally opened midway and just as I came in companies started flooding as placement season had started I definitely had skills but I was totally unsure if it would be of any use and I was right my skills were almost useless.
Out of nowhere I started coding random dsa question in python hackerrank.My friends would sometimes see and used to wonder why he is doing something of zero use and some even told me suppressed voice(because I was not close to anyone people would not tell me on face) I also mentally rejected thier opinion feedback because I was anxious and thier suggestion to learn cpp learn algo seemed bit too harsh for me. I just thought I m out of thier league.
In placement season only very few bunch of students were talented enough to complete the coding questions in time all others were relying on help(ikik).
I didn't realise this earlier and I scored miserable marks in coding tests qualifying in almost none .The day arrived of interviews I had barely qualified for any companies(except one samsung idk how I managed to score their coding test) .
My CV was poor I had no contacts or POCs to help me get to interviews my friends who had much poor performance than me got more 10x the companies interviewed me.
After my first interview experience (samsung)I cried for days hiding my face as I couldn't answer two basic question because I was anxious and it suddenly striked me seconds after the interview.
I hadn't eaten properly for days .After that all I got only interviews based on open call for interview. I got rejected in all of them because I was anxious and my brain froze in interviews.
I hadn't spoken to parents and my brother birthday just went ;my mother had called my so many times that I picked up and told her that I couldn't eat properly (didn't tell her about the interviews) the second time I told her everything and cried .my mother consoled me but she wouldn't understand the gravity of my situation.
After two days finally capgemini arrived I managed to score good in their test because it was two very simple coding q(given two integer complete function to add them and take and input and print it)and all other q were games where respone time in milliseconds mattered so somehow I was good at that.
Capgemini didn't ask a single coding question they just asked "give your introduction" ,"describe you project" and "where do you see yourself in 5 years" I was bit sus about their interview process but I knew I was qualified.
The CTC they gave was 10 lpa(9.3 base)which was very substandard considering old IIT but I had to accept thier offer because I knew I couldn't Crack off campus.
My father advised me to study well and try off campus because he knew what state I was in. But I was fickle minded and was always anxious and low self esteem I couldn't plan study properly and at that time recession also came so I was afraid to apply to other companies I thought in anxiety that if I join a company other than service based campgemini I might get laid off so it is better I stay here.
8th semester was over August 2022 came in they announced they will start my employment process which scheduled to be in August 11 but somehow luck strikes in the hr who was responsible for initiating the process was ignorant as heck(my email ID changed to alumni domain and I had given my college mail ID for job Application) I called her many times to explain but she ignored (she even saw my profile on truecaller)I mailed her from alternate mail but in vain.
The August 11 batch got into PLSQL batch which is relatively easy and tutoring, we were from IIT given a experience reserved post in capgemini they were given this. After few days I met a severe accident because I was driving speed inexperienced and scooty skid. Bleeding me profusely. I was in bedrest for a month.
I received new appointment letter for 20 sep bit as luck I got into java backend + cloud containerization role which was crowded as heck very bad and unknowledgable tutors tightly packed schedule which would exhaust you.
Just few days into the classes I realised I might have something to this wierd pain in head. Realised I was suffering from migraine .very severe that would blind me for multiple hours.This added to bad tutors and no guidance I was lost .Somehow managed to pass the exam after I took medicine and recovered partially .
Came to Bengaluru after the work from home training period.Then I met worst managers I have ever seen.Felt like a torcher the tone they used to talk didn't understand iota of my role. tried to tell them I m clueless but in vain after my first interview I realised what I missed ;basically everything.
Talked to batchmates of Bengaluru java he suggested me udemy.The only thing that helped me.
Days went by other client interviews happened rejected because even tho I was knowledge they asked me such depth that only experienced one could answer. The last client was such an asshole she gave feedback that my interview was good but she didn't feel confidence😑.
I urged them(Manager) to put in me study plan they did but mid way they pulled me and in a cold voice warned my that pip will start from today. Pip ripped apart my remaining health I suffered severe migraines and I even was forgetting things I had checkup and I learned I has vit b12 deficient .
The course plan was such that even sitting 11 hours a day(inc weekends) I wouldn't be able to complete just the videos and above that homework and quizzes.
I urged them many times to reconsider the syllabus and time frame ;they told all others were given same plan.(most then either resigned or they kept them by extending time and torchering them).
By second week I realised no way this syllabus can be completed so I just bunked.
One of my friend cum batchmate was also in pip and he resigned as he had a plan to do masters in civil engineering, in the heat of the moment I also resigned not realising my biggest blunder in my life. I bunked the meetings and finally they threatened me with disciplinary action and gave me two options : continue pip or leave now. I stammered in anxiety and fear I told okay continue and idk out of fikle minded after few minutes I told them okay I m leaving -> even bigger blunder. I cried like I have lost my life that day.
After few days I packed everything and left for home.
At home I was stuck overthinking which career path to choose first I choose masters in maths then flipped to chemistry then to mba some suggested ias .
Finally after a month I decided coding is the best way because Idk I might be stuck for years here. I was solving dsa day and night and applying aggressively everywhere including finance broker roles etc.
Then in Nov my education loan was opened for emi and I received sms I was frozen . How would I pay this when I don't have income. I told my father and he was calm .I was shaking inside first installment was 5k paid by me Second installment 14k papa paid somehow. I was anxious depressed and overthinking .
Over few months my cibil is destroyed ,I m sure I won't get any loans further ;it is almost becoming NPA.
Throughout the 7 months idk why I m so afraid to talk to people from my collage and ask for referral sometimes I get courage sometimes my mind just procrastinates over it because of anxiety and overthinking.
My introvert nature and social anxiety and procrastination anxiety (peer pressure ) has ruined so many things that I even can't imagine. If anybody has any advice suggestions or help for me please reach me out in comments/dms.

TL;DR at the bottom.
Preface:
On Sunday 17 March my Jagex Account was hacked. During the time since I have been working to understand how it happened and communicating with Jagex Customer support to understand the implications of losing access to my Jagex Account. I have learnt a lot about account security and Jagex’s systems and policies, but have also seen a lot of misunderstanding from other people. I am sharing this post to hopefully educate people on how to best secure their account and to suggest improvements to Jagex Accounts and/or Jagex’s Recovery Policy. (IGN “Defaulted” if you are interesting in the account)
The background:
In December 2023 I made the decision to upgrade my account to a Jagex Account.
Prior to upgrading to a Jagex Account my account was protected by 2-factor authentication (2fa) aka multi factor authentication via an authenticator app on my smartphone. Critically, the email address I used to manage the account was not protected by multi factor authentication. Based on my own judgment, I deemed the fact that my Runescape account was protected by 2fa on a phone app was secure enough. It did not matter if my email was compromised because the 2fa would always protect my account. My account was many, many years old and had never encountered any issues and so I grew complacent.
Here is the first key learning I want to share: A Jagex accounts default 2fa method is email until you change it. If you previously had 2fa on your phone app, Jagex systems will change your 2fa method to email. And as many readers will know, email 2fa is far less secure than an authenticator application especially when the email address itself is not protected - I am sure you can see what is coming.
On Sunday 17 March my email account was compromised, this meant that the bad actor was able to perform a password reset on my Jagex Account facilitated by the 2fa code which was now routed to the email account. In addition to changing the password on my account, they were then also able to enable their own 2fa application on my account., thus, completely locking me out of my account. This happened at approximately 1am in the morning. Furthermore, as my debit card details were saved to my Runescape account, the bad actor was able to spend £150.00 ($180.00) on bonds before my bank identified the transactions as fraudulent.
What happened next:
At approximately 8am I received a text message from my bank advising me of multiple potential fraudulent transactions on my account. I reach them via phone immediately. Through conversation with them they advised that because I had an existing relationship with Jagex I must take up the issue with them directly. Until this point, not being long out of bed, it had not occurred to me at this stage that my Runescape account had been compromised. Upon checking my emails and seeing a “Your Password Was Changed” email - at this stage in a state of panic - followed the instructions on the email, and here is the second key learning, “If you did not make this change, please contact Jagex Support.” Because there is no link on the email to contact Jagex Support, I spent some time trying to find the appropriate contact method, which I eventually did and at which point (8:40am) I notified Jagex Support of both the fraudulent bank payments as well as the loss of access to my account. Queries into Jagex Support have a 2 day SLA and so began a very intense and nerve wracking wait for a response. On Monday 7:33am I received my first response, which can be seen here. Kudos to Jagex for immediately returning the funds from the fraudulent transactions. The third learning, and this is an important one, is that Mod Melora confirms that we are not able to assist with recovering this Jagex account. Strange. They have immediately acknowledged the fraudulent bank activity and by extension that the account has been hijacked, so you would think that they are satisfied with the fact that I am the account owner, so why are they not able to assist in recovering my account?
After a few emails back and forth (one response from Jagex per day) as seen here Mod Beano confirms that “there is no manual recovery method for Jagex accounts. As such, I'm very sorry but we are unable to assist any further with the recovery of this Jagex account or any of the linked characters.” This is not “we are not able to assist with recovering this Jagex account” this is a “we cannot recover any Jagex accounts”
My concern at this point grows. Jagex knows and has accepted that my account has been hijacked, but cannot help me recover the account? I enquire as to the status of the account (and how to make an official complaint) - if I cannot have access to my account, can it be disabled so that the hijacker can also not have access? As it turns out, yes it can be disabled. As seen here. Furthermore, Mod Rache confirms that there is a policy of no manual account recovery which was introduced alongside Jagex accounts.
And that leads us today and me writing this wall of text. My account is effectively in stasis. It cannot be accessed by my hijacker, nor do I have the tools myself or the support from Jagex to recover it. It will remain in this state until the policy of no account recovery is changed. The good news is that because I acted quickly my bank pin (in theory) has not been disabled so my items are safe until such a time.
What does this mean for you: If you have a Jagex account, the worst happens, and you do not have the tools to recover the account yourself then you will permanently lose access to your account, if you’re lucky you will manage to preserve your in-game bank. JAGEX WILL NOT HELP YOU. This begs the question, what are some best practices to stop yourself getting hacked in the first place? A few easy steps:
1) Enable a 2fa application, do not rely on email 2fa. KNOW IF YOU UPGRADE TO JAGEX ACCOUNT YOU NEED TO RESET YOUR APPLICATION 2FA. If you have upgraded to a Jagex account, log into the Runescape website and make sure that you are still set up on your 2fa application.
2) When you enable a 2fa application with a Jagex account you will be given 10 backup codes. These are to be used as one off access codes should you not be able to access your 2fa application. E.g., if you lose your phone. MAKE SURE TO SAVE THESE IN A SAFE PLACE, BUT NOT SOMEWHERE THAT A BAD ACTOR CAN FIND THEM.
3) Enable 2fa application on your email.
4) If your account is compromised, contact Jagex immediately so that they can a) disable your account, and as a result b) prevents your bank PIN from being disabled. Yes you will not be able to access your account, but your account will be preserved, potentially for the future.
5) Set your in-game bank PIN to a 7-day removal rather than the default 3-day removal. This buys precious necessary time to perform the above set. This can be done by talking to a banker in-game.
TL;DR
What’s now:
Given that an account can be in such a state that Jagex will disable it so that no one, including the owner of the account can access it, despite acknowledging as such, clearly shows that the system needs to be changed. Mod Rache has insinuated that in the future it’s possible that the policy of no manual recovery may be changed, and therefore, I have the following suggestions which if implemented would enable Jagex to feasibly re-introduce a level of manual account recovery without compromising the additional security benefits of a Jagex account. Just one of these options would be a huge improvement and allow Jagex to remove their no manual recovery policy.
1) Provide alternate 2fa methods. Many services, Google, Microsoft, etc., let you pick an alternate verification method should you not have access to your primary method. E.g., if you normally verify with an application, you can request a one-off code by sending via SMS or email to pre-defined details.
2) KYC - Know your Customer. Based on information Jagex already holds about you - your name, your billing details, your billing address, verify these details against official documentation. In my region most, if not all companies, can verify you with an ID, Proof of Address, and Proof of payment. E.g., a driving license, a utility bill, and bank transaction. Use these documents to verify ownership. Granted, a minor may be disadvantaged here.
3) Biometric/Video Selfie, e.g., Monzo bank. Details found here. https://monzo.com/blog/2019/08/28/take-a-video-selfie-to-sign-up-for-monzo. If you submit a video selfie to Jagex and subsequent account changes require another video selfie as confirmation of the change your physical form as well as vocals act as a unique verification. A steamer may be disadvantaged here.

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Hey fellow gamers, I'm in a bit of a pickle here, and I could really use your collective brainpower to get me out of it.
So, picture this: I've got this epic email account, right? It's like the Holy Grail of my gaming life. It's connected to all my games, launchers, and most importantly, my precious skins. But guess what? I've lost access to it because I no longer have the number it's linked to. And to add insult to injury, the mobile company tells me they've sold off that number like it's some hot potato! 😡🤬
Now, here's where it gets interesting. Whoever got my old number apparently has no clue about the magic of WhatsApp. I mean, seriously? What kind of person doesn't use WhatsApp in this day and age? If they did, I could've just recovered my account with a simple SMS.
So, here's my dilemma: I need that SMS to unlock my email and reclaim my gaming kingdom. But how in the pixelated world do I get it? Is there some secret hacker ninja technique I'm missing out on? Or is my email account doomed to wander the digital wasteland forever? 😅😔🥲
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Hello!
I had someone hack my Steam account on Wednesday while I was abroad in Portugal. They managed to "recover"/reset my Steam authenticator app to a different device so they could login.
I checked my texts and I did receive an SMS for it with a plain text code - but I obviously did nothing with it.
How were they able to retrieve that code in order to use it to reset which device to use as the Steam authenticator? Do I need to change my phone number now?
I am now concerned as so much of my stuff is attached to that phone number, of course.