Hairiest pussy

“Well Sir, me and my old buddy, Grits, wuz a drivin’ down to town late one dark and stormy night. Lightning was a flash in’ and da rain wuz a comin’ down in sheets. It wuz a blowin’ sideways, it wuz. Ya see, old Grits’ nephew got hisself in a bit o trouble and we wuz a goin’ down to da county lock up to bail him out. It seems dat Grits’ nephew got into a brawl at the local beer house and nearly kilt a damn yankee with his bare hands. I was goin’ along to sign one of them there propty bonds so we could get the lil so sumbitch out.”
“It twere abouts an hour drive, and halfway thar nature called. I said ‘Hey Grits, pull this sum bitch over so’s I can take a piss.’ Old Grits obliged. So I gits out on the side of the road, with the rain a blowin’, and finds me a tree to stay dry under while I drained the old iguana.”
“Now, son, it wuz dark out there! I unzipped my fly and started doing my thang. All a sudden I noticed 2 red eyes lookin’ up at me. There was eyeshine due to the light from the truck. Then it moved closer to me and revealed itself. It wuz a sum bitchin’ coon. I sed, ‘Hey there, Mista Coon. Want a drink?’, then redirected my piss stream and peed all over its face!’ Heh heh heh heh!”
“Well what happened next wuz no laffin’ matter. As you will recall, I recently had my testicular balls shot plum off me by that woman at the whore house. I kept my fuckin’ stick intact. But I had to get me a pair of them prosthetic balls to replace my original set.”
“When I pissed in that sorry coon’s face, it CHARGED me, grabbed my fake nuts in its mouth, and then run off in the woods with ‘em! I yelled, ‘DAGNAMMIT COON!!! BRING MY BALLS BACK HERE!!!’ Then I took off after him!”
“Well sir, I jest happened to have me a couple Smith and Wesson .44 magnums on me (in case we had trouble at the county lockup). I pulled my pistols and dual-wielded them, John Wick style, blasting away at that damn critter as I chased after him. But that critter wuz a wiley one, and it wuz dark and pouring rain. It wuz nowhere in sight.”
“After a little ways I found myself standing in a little clearing, aside a crick. I sed, ‘where is you, ya rotten scoundrel?’ I wuz way off’n the road by this point and it wuz blacker than the Ace Of Spades out there. Suddenly, I heard a rustle in the bushes on the other side of the branch.”
“I sed, ‘I know ya there, ya dirty bastard. I gots sumthin’ a special fer ya.’ I reholstered my magnums and pulled out my .50 AE Desert Eagle I wuz a carryin’ in my shoulder holster. This bad boy be the one dun up in gold and tiger stripes. I bought it fer 2 bits at the local pawn shop, Mothman Pawn and Pizza. More importantly, I had me one o them new fangled LED lights a mounted on it. I flipped on that light and flipped off the safety.”
“As I shined that that light across the stream I hear this grunt sound. I thought, ‘ Hot Damn!! That sounds like vittles! I am gonna get me a deer!’ I shined my light in the direction of the grunt sound and immediately picked up eye shine. But it twernt from no deer. This shine wuz about 10 feet high off the ground. I swallered and took a deep breath. I knew this critter could be only one thing: a goddamn Bigfoot!”
“I quickly switched my pistol light on strobe to disorientate the sumbitch and started blasting! I emptied that thar magazine in just an instant, then jacked another one up in my pistol. I heard a groaning sound coming from the other side of that branch. I knew I had hit the beast. I also knew it wuz not dead. Them Sasquatch can be doubly dangerous when you only wing ‘em, so I knew I had to tread lightly.”
“By now Grits knowd something wuz a goin’ down. From the gun shots it wuz clear that I wuz in combat mode. Old Grits came a barreling through the woods with his double barrel on the ready. It wuz so dark out there in the brush he liked to run all over me, so I took the butt of my pistol and walloped the fuck out of him right in his face.”
“Old Grits yelled out in pain and demanded to know why I smashed his nose. I said, ‘You crazy fool, I jest saved your sorry skin. There’s a Bigfoot over there and he’s wounded.’ Grits understood. Then he pulled out a handkerchief to tend to the bloody nose I gave him. ‘What we gonna do?’ asked Grits.”
“I told Grits ‘He’s right over thar in that brush, jest the other side of the creek. You go over there and draw him out and I’ll put a kill shot in its head.’ Grits asked ‘WHY ME?!?’ I replied, ‘Cuz you can’t kill shit with that thar scatter gun and I gots the light, you dumb fuck! Don’t be a fucking pussy! Look, alls you got to do is make that critter move so I can see it and I’ll kill it. You won’t get hurt. NOW MOVE IT, OR YOU ARE GONNA HAVE TO DIG A SLUG FROM MY GUN OUT OF YOUR FAT ASS!!’ Grits obeyed and crossed the crick while I covered him.
“Old Grits wuz a pokin’ around in all that brush . I wuz gittin’ flustered and yelled at him to speed it up. Grits turned and gave me a nasty look. Then out of the brush came the biggest, hairiest arm you ever did see. It wuz HUGE!!! That Sasquatch reached fer Old Grits. I yelled out ‘Grits!!! Watch Out!!!!’, but it wuz too late. That thar Sasquatch grabbed Grits and ripped off his head!! Blood shot straight up outa Grits’ neck hole like gushing water from a far hose, it did!”
“While this attack on Grits happened lightning quick, that Bigfoot showed his self just long enough for me to get a head shot on it! ‘BLAM!!!!’ Bigfoot blood and brains splattered all over them woods! That monster dropped like a sack of taters!”
“I jumped the creek to inspect all the damage. Poor Grits wuz gone. It wuz a shame. He wuz a good man. He also had $5,000.00 cash in his overalls for bailing his nephew outa jail. ‘What the fuck?’, I thought. Nobody gonna miss this now. Hell, I didn’t even know his nephew. So I pocketed that money. I then turned my attention to the Bigfoot.”
“I examined the Sasquatch. It wuz HUGE! It wuz at least 10 feet tall, and prolly 750 pounds. I shined my light on it face. It wuz an ugly sum bitch. Then suddenly it opened its eyes! I jumped back and fixed my sights on its head. It opened its mouth and made a gurgling sound. It wuz near death. Then it did the damnedest thang I ever did see,”
“The dying Bigfoot weakly raised its right arm and turned its head in its direction, like it wanted me to see sumthin’. I moved my light toward its arm movement. There in the dirty beast’s right hand was a raccoon head. It looked like it had been ripped clean off the critter. But there wuz sumthin’ else. There in the mouth of that severed coon head wuz my prosthetic scrotums. ‘MY BALLS!!’, I exclaimed.”
“That sum bitchin’ Bigfoot critter had fetched my balls fer me and now it wuz returning them to me. I approached the critter and knelt down beside it. I said ‘You is a good boy. Thanky fer gettin’ my ball sacks back fer me, buddy.’ Then I put the critter out of its misery. ‘BLAM!!!!’ The Sasquatch was deader than hell.”
“I retrieved my balls. I could have collected that Sasquatch body too and made me some crazy bank. But Old Grits dun went and got hisself kilt, that shit head. That’s a homicide in these parts and I ain’t too fond of grand juries and inquisitions and sech. So I figured I best be getting out of thar, and quick. I jest happened to have an incendiary device on me. That cleaned up the scene pretty well. I left Grits’ truck there and walked home. It took me the rest of the night, but that’s life. As far as anyone knew I had never even seen sold Grits that night.”
“When I finally got home I re-attached my balls. They wuz a little chewed up, but they’ll be ok. I just tell people like old Doc the bitches like to gnaw on ‘em!”

What would you accept in our community for the rest of June, and potentially a little longer to continue protesting the upcoming reddit changes?
There are 3 options to choose from, as taken from ideas the community came up with. Whatever wins this poll is the action we will take for the duration of the protest.
​
Now, the three options in the poll are as follows:
Temporarily marking our subreddit as NSFW due to profanity. In order to do this without having reddit admins mad at us we NEED TO have NSFW (Not Safe For Work) content. What exactly is considered NSFW content? Anything that contains nudity, pornography, or profanity, which a reasonable viewer may not want to be seen accessing in a public or formal setting such as in a workplace should be tagged as NSFW. We would continue to remove NSFW content that is anything except PROFANITY, and every post would require some swear words.
Changing the meaning of what we consider razor free. This was a fun idea brought up in our previous post. There are Honda scooters, Vespa, Yamaha, rentable e-scooters found available in rows to use in cities... The catch being that we won't accept Razor brand scooters.
The other thing mentioned was our hairiest parts. Our hairy pussies. But, our SFW actual legit feline friends. The internet loves cats, right? Our content would be pictures of CATS only.
Also, PLEASE leave a comment below with ideas on how we should carry this through. Some ideas for that would be...Do you want these changes to take place for the entire duration of the protest, all day every day til this is over?Do you want NSFW/non razor scooters/cats content from Mon-Fri, leaving weekends to our regular body hair content?Do you want Mon-Fri to be regular body hair content, and weekends to be the time we protest?Do you want one day a week to be dedicated to the protest? Maybe have a Fun Friday for NSFW/non razor scooters/cat content?
View Poll

Im bored waiting for lockdown to be over so I figured I'd make the following categories for anyone in the history of Bravo. Who would you put where, and why?
Poorest Bravo person of all time-
Richest- Adrienne, Lisa Vanderpump, Kyle Richards, Kandi, Peggy
Most unstable/delusional- Kelly Dodd, Kelly Bensimon, Siggy, Kenya, Sonja
Highest IQ- Definitely Bethenny
Lowest IQ- Either Kelly Bensimon or Kelly Dood. And Teresa of course. Although Kameron, and all of OC are close runner ups.
Highest Body count- Erika, Luann, Sonja, Kelly Dodd, Danielle
Most insecure- Nene, Gizlele, Vicki
Hairiest- Siggy
Who smells the worst?- I feel like the OC ladies dont wash their pussies. Also Brandi and Siggy.
Who smells the best? Lisa V
Best house? Lydia
Ugliest house? Gina
Best fashion sense? Dorit
Worst fashion sense? Gizelle / Robyn
Worst breath? Kelly Bensimon
Most eggs? Meghan?
Have fun with it!

I got a call from uncle Roy yesterday. It seems he is riding out the Hurricane pretty well. But he cannot get outside and work, so he is holed up in his cabin drinking shine, reloading shotgun shells, and listening to Liquid Metal on Sirius/XM. He was getting a touch of “cabin fever” and decided to give me a call.
During our conversation, Roy started on a story. “Oh, ya’ll don’t wanna hear no story from an old hillbilly, do ya?” I said, “Hell yeah, I do!”, and then he started in on it. What follows is my transcription of his latest Sasquatch story, as faithful as possible to Roy’s rendition.
“Well Sir, me and my old buddy, Grits, wuz a drivin’ down to town late one dark and stormy night. Lightning was a flash in’ and da rain wuz a comin’ down in sheets. It wuz a blowin’ sideways, it wuz. Ya see, old Grits’ nephew got hisself in a bit o trouble and we wuz a goin’ down to da county lock up to bail him out. It seems dat Grits’ nephew got into a brawl at the local beer house and nearly kilt a damn yankee with his bare hands. I was goin’ along to sign one of them there propty bonds so we could get him out.”
“It twere abouts an hour drive, and halfway thar nature called. I said ‘Hey Grits, pull this sum bitch over so’s I can take a piss.’ Old Grits obliged. So I gits out on the side of the road, with the rain a blowin’, and finds me a tree to stay dry under while I drained the old iguana.”
“Now, son, it wuz dark out there! I unzipped my fly and started doing my thang. All a sudden I noticed 2 eyes lookin’ up at me. There was eyeshine due to the light from the truck. Then it moved closer to me and revealed itself. It wuz a sum bitchin’ coon. I sed, ‘Hey there, Mista Coon. Want a drink?’, then redirected my piss stream and peed all in its face!’ Heh heh heh heh!”
“Well what happened next wuz no laffin’ matter. As you will recall, Bud, I recently had my testicular balls shot plum off me by that woman at the whore house. I kept my fuckin’ stick intact. But I had to get me a pair of them prosthetic balls to replace my original set.”
“When I pissed in that sorry coon’s face, it CHARGED me, grabbed my fake nuts in its mouth, and then run off in the woods with ‘em! I yelled, ‘DAGNAMMIT COON!!! BRING MY BALLS BACK HERE!!!’ Then I took off after him!”
“Well sir, I jest happened to have me a couple Smith and Wesson .44 magnums on me (in case we had trouble at the county lockup). I pulled my pistols and dual-wielded them, John Wick style, blasting away at that damn critter as I chased after him. But that critter wuz a Wiley one, and it wuz dark and pouring rain. It wuz nowhere in sight.”
“After a little ways I found myself standing in a little clearing, aside a crick. I sed, ‘where is you, ya rotten scoundrel?’ I wuz way off’n the road by this point and it wuz blacker than the Ace Of Spades out there. Suddenly, I heard a rustle in the bushes on the other side of the branch.”
“I sed, ‘I know ya there, ya dirty bastard. I gots sumthin’ a special fer ya.’ I reholstered my magnums and pulled out my .50 AE Desert Eagle I wuz a carryin’ in my shoulder holster. This bad boy be the one dun up in gold and tiger stripes. More importantly, I had me one o them new fangled LED lights a mounted on it. I flipped on that light and flipped off the safety.”
“As I shined that that light across the stream I hear this grunt sound. I thought, ‘ Hot Damn!! That sounds like vittles! I am gonna get me a deer!’ I shined my light in the direction of the grunt sound and immediately picked up eye shine. But it twernt from no deer. This shine wuz about 10 feet high off the ground. I swallered and took a deep breath. I knew this critter could be only one thing: a goddamn Bigfoot!”
“I quickly switched my pistol light on strobe and started blasting! I emptied that thar magazine in just an instant, then jacked another one up in my pistol. I heard a groaning sound coming from the other side of that branch. I knew I had hit the beast. I also knew it wuz not dead. Them Sasquatch can be doubly dangerous when you only wing ‘em, so I knew I had to tread lightly.”
“By now Grits Knew something wuz a goin’ down. From the gun shots it wuz clear that I wuz in combat mode. Old Grits came a barreling through the woods with his double barrel on the ready. It wuz so dark out there in the brush he liked to run all over me, so I took the butt of my pistol and walloped the fuck out of him right in his face.”
“Old Grits yelled out in pain and demanded to know why I smashed his nose. I said, ‘You crazy fool, I jest saved your sorry skin. There’s a Bigfoot over there and he’s wounded.’ Grits understood. Then he pulled out a handkerchief to tend to the bloody nose I gave him. ‘What we gonna do?’ asked Grits.”
“I told Grits ‘He’s right over thar in that brush, jest the other side of the creek. You go over there and draw him out and I’ll put a kill shot in its head.’ Grits asked ‘WHY ME?!?’ I replied, ‘Cuz you can’t kill shit with that thar scatter gun and I gots the light, you dumb fuck! Don’t be a fucking pussy! Look, alls you got to do is make that critter move so I can see it and I’ll kill it. You won’t get hurt. NOW MOVE IT, OR YOU ARE GONNA HAVE TO DIG A SLUG FROM MY GUN OUT OF YOUR FAT ASS!!’ Grits obeyed and crossed the crick while I covered him.
“Old Grits wuz a pokin’ around in all that brush . I wuz gittin’ flustered and yelled at him to speed it up. Grits turned and gave me a nasty look. Then out of the brush came the biggest, hairiest arm you ever did see. It wuz HUGE!!! That Sasquatch reached fer Old Grits. I yelled out ‘Grits!!! Watch Out!!!!’, but it wuz too late. That thar Sasquatch grabbed Grits and ripped off his head!! Blood shot straight up outa Grits’ neck hole like gushing water from a far hose, it did!”
“While this attack on Grits happened lightning quick, that Bigfoot showed his self just long enough for me to get a head shot on it! ‘BLAM!!!!’ Bigfoot blood and brains splattered all over them woods! That monster dropped like a sack of taters!”
“I jumped the creek to inspect all the damage. Poor Grits wuz gone. It wuz a shame. He wuz a good man. He also had $5,000.00 cash in his overalls for bailing his nephew outa jail. ‘What the fuck?’, I thought. Nobody gonna miss this now. Hell, I didn’t even know his nephew. So I pocketed that money. I then turned my attention to the Bigfoot.”
“I examined the Sasquatch. It wuz HUGE! It wuz at least 10 feet tall, and prolly 750 pounds. I shined my light on it face. It wuz an ugly sum bitch. Then suddenly it opened its eyes! I jumped back and fixed my sights on its head. It opened its mouth and made a gurgling sound. It wuz near death. Then it did the damnedest thang I ever did see,”
“The dying Bigfoot weakly raised its right arm and turned its head in its direction, like it wanted me to see sumthin’. I moved my light toward its arm movement. There in the dirty beast’s right hand was a raccoon head. It looked like it had been ripped clean off the critter. But there wuz sumthin’ else. There in the mouth of that severed coon head wuz my prosthetic scrotums. ‘MY BALLS!!’, I exclaimed.”
“That sum bitchin’ Bigfoot critter had fetched my balls fer me and now it wuz returning them to me. I approached the critter and knelt down beside it. I said ‘You is a good boy. Thanky fer gettin’ my ball sacks back fer me, buddy.’ Then I put the critter out of its misery. ‘BLAM!!!!’ The Sasquatch was deader than hell.”
“I retrieved my balls. I could have collected that Sasquatch body too and made me some crazy bank. But Old Grits dun went and got hisself kilt, that shit head. That’s a homicide in these parts and I ain’t too fond of grand juries and inquisitions and sech. So I figured I best be getting out of thar, and quick. I jest happened to have an incendiary device on me. That cleaned up the scene pretty well. I left Grits’ truck there and walked home. It took me the rest of the night, but that’s life. As far as anyone knew I had never even seen sold Grits that night.”
“When I finally got home I re-attached my balls. They wuz a little chewed up, but they’ll be ok. I just tell people like old Doc the bitches like to gnaw on ‘em!”