Candy buffet sayings birthday
Breaking free from your narcissistic parent as an adult child (long)
2024.06.01 14:01 Secret-Property5498 Breaking free from your narcissistic parent as an adult child (long)
Hello Dr. K and the HealthyGamer community,
I am seeking advice, support, and insights on how to emotionally separate and individuate from my parents later in life, which I should have done much earlier. The adult part of me knows what I need to do, but there's also a part of me that is frightened. Let me give you a snapshot of my life trajectory. The story is long, but I want to provide as much context as possible. If you prefer a short summary of my dilemma, please skip to the last paragraph. Otherwise, here is my life story:
I grew up in a well-to-do family in an East Asian country. My parents had me in their early 20s, just as their business began to flourish during the 'boom years.' Both came from very broken families. My mother experienced poverty, abuse, and neglect from her parents (she did not speak to her dad until he died and almost never acknowledges her mother). My father was the least favorite child in his family of three, dropped out of high school, ended up on the streets, and, as I learned a few years ago, was later imprisoned for fighting. My parents met when my mother was 19 and my father 21, ran away together, and built a very successful business in their early to mid-20s, becoming incredibly wealthy in a generally poor society.
Although we were affluent, my parents were never around. I started boarding at age 3 and spent most of my time outside school with my paternal grandparents and occasionally my maternal grandmother. My parents fought a lot. My mother once threatened to take me away and drove off with me with no specific destination. At one point, she told me she was divorcing my father, and we moved into another apartment for a day before returning home. She emotionally smothered me, saying she would die for me and that no one would love me as much as she did. She also hit me often over small things, sometimes in public. I thought she was better than my father, who, according to her, would remarry quickly if she left or died, subjecting me to abuse from an evil stepmother.
Despite our wealth, my mother took me out of an international school after six months and sent me to a state school known for being strict and militant. I was a 'good, smart kid' in primary school, but around age 12 or 13, I became very depressed and felt life had no purpose. I failed almost all my subjects except History and started drinking, influenced by my father's heavy drinking and a culture that tolerated alcoholism.
Then something happened that saved me in retrospect. My family emigrated to an Anglophone New World country, and I went to another boarding school. Despite experiencing racism and feeling self-conscious about my appearance, I improved academically and, by years 12 and 13, was among the best students. Between ages 13-18, I saw my father rarely, perhaps once or twice a year. My mother visited periodically, and they bought a house near the school, where I lived mostly alone. Like many first-generation immigrant kids, I handled most family matters because my parents couldn't speak English.
When it was time for university, I wanted to study law and politics at the local public university, but my father insisted I go to the UK or the US, believing a degree from the local university would not lead to a good job. He also prevented me from taking a gap year. I regret not leaving home to get a job. I applied to many universities and chose the worst-ranked one in London because I wanted to be in the city.
University was eye-opening. I discovered Europe and realized the world was much bigger than the conformist, conservative East Asian country and backwater suburbs I knew. However, my degree didn't prepare me for life, and my emotionally underdeveloped state made me miserable in adult relationships. I chose emotionally distant or abusive friends, hurt people who liked me, and did no internships or travel because I was expected to help my family during holidays. I wanted to stay in London, looked for random jobs, but had no life skills or work experience. Eventually, I returned to East Asia.
By then, my father had moved to a more cosmopolitan East Asian city, living extravagantly. I interned at a fancy company for almost a year, hoping for a job offer that never came. I soon found a job in brand consulting and finally started earning money at 23. I had a relationship with an older woman, but I was still emotionally detached. I tried freelancing, learned to impress others, and almost made enough to support myself, but I was fundamentally lost and unhappy. I experienced my first depressive episode and decided to return to London for a Master's degree. My father agreed to fund my education.
That year was the happiest of my life. I loved university, research, and being with smart, nerdy people. I met an intelligent, caring, and beautiful woman, and we moved in together. I discovered more fulfilling ways to live and found that success didn't mean working for an investment bank or being rich. I wanted to be an academic, applied for a PhD, and got in after two attempts.
Academia wasn't all rosy. The work conditions were awful, and the publish-or-perish mentality sucked the joy out of research. I loved teaching but quickly learned it mattered little at a 'research university.' I gained weight, my relationship deteriorated, arguments turned physical, and I felt worthless. The pandemic made things worse, and I felt I needed to radically change my life. My solution was to become the person my family wanted: filial, loyal, and rich. I was ready to abandon my life in London and move back to East Asia to 'stop being a loser.'
I returned home, trying to fix my family and shower them with love. I interned at a VC firm, but it clashed with my values, and I cried every day at work. I broke up with my girlfriend for someone with no emotional attachment, leading to great sex but zero intimacy. Within three months, I was broke, living in a short-term rental, and eating unhealthily. Fortunately, I had a therapist, a good friend in Shanghai, and my girlfriend gave me a second chance. I realized my family's emotional neglect contributed to my unhappiness and depression. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and medicated, which helped me move out of paralysis. I confronted my family about their past actions and my diagnosis. My mother reacted poorly, calling me names and accusing me of being a horrible son. This ordeal made me realize I needed to break away from them. What I threw away in London was actually the most valuable: a career, a family, my identity.
After confronting my mother that year, she vowed never to see me again. However, 6-8 months later, she sent me a large sum of money for my birthday. I let her back into my life, partly for financial help but also seeking proof of their love and acceptance. Things improved initially, but soon she started complaining about mistreatment by my partner. Then, my parents promised to buy me a flat and pressured me to get married. I accepted the flat for stability and freedom, ignoring their past behavior. Predictably, the flat became a tool for my mother to control me. She threatened to sue me if my girlfriend moved in and disputed the flat's ownership just weeks before the move-in date. I have a demanding job and spend much of my day dealing with this situation, processing the emotional toll of my mother's actions. I feel unsafe, violated, and confused. I hear a voice telling me this is all my fault and that I'm too weak. I know what I need to do cognitively, but emotionally I'm paralyzed. Do you understand what I mean? What would you do?
submitted by Secret-Property5498 to Healthygamergg [link] [comments]
I am seeking advice, support, and insights on how to emotionally separate and individuate from my parents later in life, which I should have done much earlier. The adult part of me knows what I need to do, but there's also a part of me that is frightened. Let me give you a snapshot of my life trajectory. The story is long, but I want to provide as much context as possible. If you prefer a short summary of my dilemma, please skip to the last paragraph. Otherwise, here is my life story:
I grew up in a well-to-do family in an East Asian country. My parents had me in their early 20s, just as their business began to flourish during the 'boom years.' Both came from very broken families. My mother experienced poverty, abuse, and neglect from her parents (she did not speak to her dad until he died and almost never acknowledges her mother). My father was the least favorite child in his family of three, dropped out of high school, ended up on the streets, and, as I learned a few years ago, was later imprisoned for fighting. My parents met when my mother was 19 and my father 21, ran away together, and built a very successful business in their early to mid-20s, becoming incredibly wealthy in a generally poor society.
Although we were affluent, my parents were never around. I started boarding at age 3 and spent most of my time outside school with my paternal grandparents and occasionally my maternal grandmother. My parents fought a lot. My mother once threatened to take me away and drove off with me with no specific destination. At one point, she told me she was divorcing my father, and we moved into another apartment for a day before returning home. She emotionally smothered me, saying she would die for me and that no one would love me as much as she did. She also hit me often over small things, sometimes in public. I thought she was better than my father, who, according to her, would remarry quickly if she left or died, subjecting me to abuse from an evil stepmother.
Despite our wealth, my mother took me out of an international school after six months and sent me to a state school known for being strict and militant. I was a 'good, smart kid' in primary school, but around age 12 or 13, I became very depressed and felt life had no purpose. I failed almost all my subjects except History and started drinking, influenced by my father's heavy drinking and a culture that tolerated alcoholism.
Then something happened that saved me in retrospect. My family emigrated to an Anglophone New World country, and I went to another boarding school. Despite experiencing racism and feeling self-conscious about my appearance, I improved academically and, by years 12 and 13, was among the best students. Between ages 13-18, I saw my father rarely, perhaps once or twice a year. My mother visited periodically, and they bought a house near the school, where I lived mostly alone. Like many first-generation immigrant kids, I handled most family matters because my parents couldn't speak English.
When it was time for university, I wanted to study law and politics at the local public university, but my father insisted I go to the UK or the US, believing a degree from the local university would not lead to a good job. He also prevented me from taking a gap year. I regret not leaving home to get a job. I applied to many universities and chose the worst-ranked one in London because I wanted to be in the city.
University was eye-opening. I discovered Europe and realized the world was much bigger than the conformist, conservative East Asian country and backwater suburbs I knew. However, my degree didn't prepare me for life, and my emotionally underdeveloped state made me miserable in adult relationships. I chose emotionally distant or abusive friends, hurt people who liked me, and did no internships or travel because I was expected to help my family during holidays. I wanted to stay in London, looked for random jobs, but had no life skills or work experience. Eventually, I returned to East Asia.
By then, my father had moved to a more cosmopolitan East Asian city, living extravagantly. I interned at a fancy company for almost a year, hoping for a job offer that never came. I soon found a job in brand consulting and finally started earning money at 23. I had a relationship with an older woman, but I was still emotionally detached. I tried freelancing, learned to impress others, and almost made enough to support myself, but I was fundamentally lost and unhappy. I experienced my first depressive episode and decided to return to London for a Master's degree. My father agreed to fund my education.
That year was the happiest of my life. I loved university, research, and being with smart, nerdy people. I met an intelligent, caring, and beautiful woman, and we moved in together. I discovered more fulfilling ways to live and found that success didn't mean working for an investment bank or being rich. I wanted to be an academic, applied for a PhD, and got in after two attempts.
Academia wasn't all rosy. The work conditions were awful, and the publish-or-perish mentality sucked the joy out of research. I loved teaching but quickly learned it mattered little at a 'research university.' I gained weight, my relationship deteriorated, arguments turned physical, and I felt worthless. The pandemic made things worse, and I felt I needed to radically change my life. My solution was to become the person my family wanted: filial, loyal, and rich. I was ready to abandon my life in London and move back to East Asia to 'stop being a loser.'
I returned home, trying to fix my family and shower them with love. I interned at a VC firm, but it clashed with my values, and I cried every day at work. I broke up with my girlfriend for someone with no emotional attachment, leading to great sex but zero intimacy. Within three months, I was broke, living in a short-term rental, and eating unhealthily. Fortunately, I had a therapist, a good friend in Shanghai, and my girlfriend gave me a second chance. I realized my family's emotional neglect contributed to my unhappiness and depression. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and medicated, which helped me move out of paralysis. I confronted my family about their past actions and my diagnosis. My mother reacted poorly, calling me names and accusing me of being a horrible son. This ordeal made me realize I needed to break away from them. What I threw away in London was actually the most valuable: a career, a family, my identity.
After confronting my mother that year, she vowed never to see me again. However, 6-8 months later, she sent me a large sum of money for my birthday. I let her back into my life, partly for financial help but also seeking proof of their love and acceptance. Things improved initially, but soon she started complaining about mistreatment by my partner. Then, my parents promised to buy me a flat and pressured me to get married. I accepted the flat for stability and freedom, ignoring their past behavior. Predictably, the flat became a tool for my mother to control me. She threatened to sue me if my girlfriend moved in and disputed the flat's ownership just weeks before the move-in date. I have a demanding job and spend much of my day dealing with this situation, processing the emotional toll of my mother's actions. I feel unsafe, violated, and confused. I hear a voice telling me this is all my fault and that I'm too weak. I know what I need to do cognitively, but emotionally I'm paralyzed. Do you understand what I mean? What would you do?
2024.06.01 14:00 thehogdog What board game said 'Fun for ages 8 to 80' on the box? Going to an 80 year olds birthday party and want to get him a copy.
Live in gods waiting room and a guy is having an 80 year old birthday party and his partner DIDNT click 'no gifts' on the eVite so everyone is pretty mad that we have to get a RICH 80 year old a gift.
Lots of Thrift Stores here so maybe I can find a copy and/or hopefully the new ones have that slogan.
Could have been Monopoly or Sorry, but it was a big board game, not some niche game.
Any help? It is at 6pm and I just thought it would be funny to get it and put a post it note around the age and tell him he only has 364 more days to enjoy it and MAKE A BIG POINT OF HIS AGE and the fact that they didnt say 'no gifts please' like other adults do.
submitted by thehogdog to boardgames [link] [comments]
Lots of Thrift Stores here so maybe I can find a copy and/or hopefully the new ones have that slogan.
Could have been Monopoly or Sorry, but it was a big board game, not some niche game.
Any help? It is at 6pm and I just thought it would be funny to get it and put a post it note around the age and tell him he only has 364 more days to enjoy it and MAKE A BIG POINT OF HIS AGE and the fact that they didnt say 'no gifts please' like other adults do.
2024.06.01 13:52 MonitoliMal Total Drama Island With Ace Attorney Lawyers Part 7: Episodes 13 and 14 (TEAMS MERGE)
 | Recap: Given how much drama happened before, the teams were graced with a trust-based challenge. While Kristoph didn’t make himself look any better, the one who ultimately suffered the most was Blackquill, whose demeanor changed after Athena’s elimination. Not trusting that he would kill again or simply wanting to eliminate a threat before merge, he ultimately fell at this juncture. Nahyuta also started losing trust for Ga’ran, but he kept that all to himself to survive the premerge. In the next challenge, the teams had to endure Chef’s boot camp. While both teams were close, Kristoph ultimately ended the challenge by knocking down Nahyuta from the tree with a rock, winning the challenge for the Defense. For his irritating caffeine withdrawal symptoms, the prosecution handed Godot his fate. Who will take the final team win and the first merge win in these next 2 episodes? Who will rise from the ashes to compete again? Let’s find out. Here are the teams as they currently stand: submitted by MonitoliMal to AceAttorney [link] [comments] https://preview.redd.it/4fuwircp7y3d1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=fe3a733427b718e15d9f7f0c4e9448fca1fd5cf5 Episode 12 Summary: The final team challenge is the extreme sports challenge. Each team must assign 4 people to compete in 3 separate challenges. The first challenge is skydiving where the rest of the team has to make sure their teammate lands on a mattress as close to the center as possible. Apollo and Klavier both volunteer. While both teams manage to get them to land on the targets, the Defense has more people and thus get a more accurate landing for their first point. The next challenge is a moose rodeo for which Phoenix and Nahyuta both volunteer. Since Nahyuta has a kinder demeanor towards animals, he managed to stay on for much longer than poor Phoenix, netting the Prosecution their first point. For the final game, both a driver for one team and a skier for the other and vice-versa must compete to collect flags for a mud skiing challenge. The driver volunteers are Kristoph and Ga’ran and the skier volunteers are Gregory and Miles. Ga’ran keeps trying to throw off Gregory but can’t find a way without breaking the challenge rules, allowing him to get most of the flags. Kristoph tries to throw off Miles, but actually succeeds before the last stretch by cutting him loose with a sharp object, meaning Miles can’t complete the course and the Defense wins. After the challenge, Blaise and Ga’ran rope Nahyuta into voting out Miles since he’s the most likely to ally against them in merge. Miles ultimately got voted off… BUT before he could get on the Dock of Shame– https://reddit.com/link/1d5la1w/video/sxpvdper7y3d1/player Gregory interrupts the ceremony and says his goodbyes to Miles! He regrets not being able to interact with him as someone on the other team, but is proud of him for making it this far. He didn’t join to win the money, but instead to break him away from Von Karma, however he didn’t expect Miles to take him down himself. Having served his purpose on the show, Gregory volunteers to get eliminated in his son’s place. Miles initially objects to this, but Greg wants him to reunite with his childhood friend Phoenix and his friends not as rivals, but as allies. Chris allows this to happen as he found Gregory Edgeworth “too boring for TV ratings” with his straight-laced demeanor and was itching to eliminate him. And so it was that Gregory Edgeworth was the final contestant not to make it to merge. MERGE TIME: Since Mia and Ga’ran are the only women left, there will be no Buffet of Disgustingness challenge and we’ll skip right to merge! HOWEVER before that can happen, 2 producer fan favorite contestants will return to the game. Please welcome back Prosecutors Franziska Von Karma and Simon Blackquill! Here is the merge cast: https://preview.redd.it/vf5fbydx7y3d1.png?width=1920&format=png&auto=webp&s=f15f5f836c13dfcf9d42ca21d1e4a3f583c6bd59 Episode 13 Summary: Simon holds little ill-will towards his team for voting him out, but Franziska is pissed especially towards Miles. She takes out her anger by whipping everybody. The challenge is a game of Say Uncle where everyone has to endure a certain situation for 10 seconds. I won’t bore you with the details of who gets what situation and if they fail it, so I’ll instead list who does the best. Means can make himself calm when he wants to be, Mia could disassociate with a spirit (though this would eventually backfire with the spirit giving up), Blaise is pretty hardy, and Nahyuta is possibly the most calm. However, Blackquill is the champion of endurance and he would be the most likely to win immunity out of everyone. After the challenge, Miles follows his father’s wishes and interacts with Phoenix (much to Franziska’s annoyance). It’s awkward, but Phoenix understands where he’s coming from. Kristoph finally decides to propose an alliance with Ga’ran and Blaise, to which they accept. Nahyuta goes to Apollo and his allies to tell them to just give up in the face of his and Ga’ran’s inevitable dominance. While his allies are annoyed, Apollo notices his bracelet tense up. Nahyuta did this intentionally to get his attention and Apollo knew it. The votes against Franziska were so vast that there was nothing she could do about them. Just as she reentered the game, she had it all thrown away. https://preview.redd.it/uvcwz6t88y3d1.jpg?width=168&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=71b4096e95263323dc71913884dd31b8202ad25b How do you feel about this merge cast? Who do you think will bite the dust next? Feel free to leave a comment! |
2024.06.01 13:52 ThrowRA_Arthur03 My ex-girlfriend's (22F) birthday is coming up and I (24M) have a conflict about whether it's appropriate or just absurd to send a birthday gesture? I would really like some advice
Hey there, I need some advice on whether it's appropriate or just absurd to send a birthday letter and a small gift to my ex-girlfriend. Our situation is a bit complicated, so here's some background:
My ex and I had a relationship that spanned two significant periods. We met, got together, separated (without discussing it at all; we just drifted apart), and then almost a year later, we got back together. We broke up for the second time about three months ago.
My Conflict: I don't want to overstep any boundaries or make her feel uncomfortable. My wish is simply to make her something special. I aim to respect her space while showing this kind gesture. However, I worry about the potential of triggering negative emotions or discomfort.
So, the question is: Should I go ahead with this, or would it be better to keep my distance and let her celebrate without any of my input?
Any advice or similar experiences would be greatly appreciated.
P.S.: I'm ready for any feedback, and if I seem like I was or am a jerk, believe me, I have heard it all from myself. I really don't like the version of myself from the past year and there is really no excuse for my actions and the way I neglected her and our relationship. I also see things I still need to improve.
TL;DR: Ex-girlfriend's birthday is coming up. We broke up three months ago after a complicated relationship. I want to deliver her a handmade gift and letter but worry it might be inappropriate or make her uncomfortable. Should I go ahead or keep my distance and just send a normal message not too long and not too short?
Thank you in advance!!
submitted by ThrowRA_Arthur03 to relationships [link] [comments]
My ex and I had a relationship that spanned two significant periods. We met, got together, separated (without discussing it at all; we just drifted apart), and then almost a year later, we got back together. We broke up for the second time about three months ago.
- In our first relationship, we had significant lack of communication. I was very avoidant and stressed, which made me distant even though I wanted to be with her and truly loved her. She tried to connect with me, but I just couldn't reciprocate. After our first breakup, I realized what went wrong and started to work on myself, digging deep into my issues and aiming for personal growth. She unknowingly pushed me towards this self-improvement journey.
- We rekindled our relationship around six months ago. This time, I was the one trying to connect, but she had been through a lot in the past year, including a traumatic event, which I won't go into detail about. She wanted the relationship mentally but was emotionally too hurt and tired to commit fully. She has a lot on her plate: a full-time job, started her Bachelor’s studies, and has issues at home with her parents. After two months, she chose not to continue the relationship, feeling it wasn’t fair to me as she couldn’t be fully present, although she saw that I was willing to stay, fight for us, be patient with her, and sit in the mud with her.
- During our breakup talk, I gave her a therapeutic gift so she can draw in her alone time or whenever she likes (she loves to draw but didn’t have many opportunities to do so in the past year). We ended things positively, holding hands while walking around the park and saying "see you later" instead of a formal goodbye.
- I've been focusing on personal growth since then and am not looking to get back together. I genuinely see it as better for her to have the time to heal and get stronger. I wish her all the best because she deserves to be happy.
My Conflict: I don't want to overstep any boundaries or make her feel uncomfortable. My wish is simply to make her something special. I aim to respect her space while showing this kind gesture. However, I worry about the potential of triggering negative emotions or discomfort.
So, the question is: Should I go ahead with this, or would it be better to keep my distance and let her celebrate without any of my input?
Any advice or similar experiences would be greatly appreciated.
P.S.: I'm ready for any feedback, and if I seem like I was or am a jerk, believe me, I have heard it all from myself. I really don't like the version of myself from the past year and there is really no excuse for my actions and the way I neglected her and our relationship. I also see things I still need to improve.
TL;DR: Ex-girlfriend's birthday is coming up. We broke up three months ago after a complicated relationship. I want to deliver her a handmade gift and letter but worry it might be inappropriate or make her uncomfortable. Should I go ahead or keep my distance and just send a normal message not too long and not too short?
Thank you in advance!!
2024.06.01 13:50 Strong_Parsley_420 Scammed fans at festival in NY
So I was a pretty big fan I won’t lie. But I bought tickets to see her in New York and after the experience I can’t say I’m a fan of the person she turned out to be. A place called Electric Echo Park in Bainbridge NY booked her for a 4/20 hippie fest on the lake. They paid her $15,000 to play. They thought she’d fit the scene and generate a lot of traffic. Well she cancelled the show hours before she was supposed to show. All her fans, including me were already there. There were even people who came from out of the country to see her. She posted this very short video on her insta story that most people didn’t even catch before it disappeared saying she couldn’t come because her flight from the west coast to the east coast lost her bags. She had very little regard for letting her fans know she wasn’t going to show up. Then she told everyone to get a refund from the venue. She spent days asking for more money and a large tip according to the owners and then didn’t even show and left them without a headliner for a festival on a Saturday night. She refused for days to pay them back even though she told everyone to ask them for refunds, they directed her to Shanin who had actually had the money they paid for tickets. I think she did eventually pay them back like a week later. This is a smaller venue trying to get up and running and the owners were very dope and accommodating to all. They thought she’d actually be a cool hippie chick and turned out she was not. She basically was going to take them under. They believed she booked with no intentions of ever showing. The workers I talked to who corresponded with her said she had list upon lists of requests like specific sheets in a specific color of black, obscure grocery items, even down to pick these colored candies out of the bowl. They said she was a total nightmare and was frankly a total bitch. They searched high and low for her requirements so only for her to not show up and leave them to foot that bill. This venue is totally sick and up and coming. The owners were ACTUAL gracious hippies and they didn’t deserve any of this bullshit. It really changed my perspective of her and made me realize as a person she is bad vibes entirely and does not fit the music she makes or persona she portrays. It was a total bummer honestly. But nonetheless it was still a sweet show. Cowboy Killer came back for another night to headline in her place and they were probably better than she could have been anyways. If you’ve not heard of this venue and are in the NY area definitely check them out. They were amazing and did everything in their power to make sure we still had a blast despite the shit storm of Shanin Flake.
submitted by Strong_Parsley_420 to ShaninBlake [link] [comments]
2024.06.01 13:38 Ambitious_Escape4320 Advice
I'm 19 and have been battling with binge eating for about 2 years now. This has led to me not having the confidence to be social and life's been downhill. I was obese in lockdown, got down to a lean weight and I was doing well in life until I went to a buffet on a birthday and I started binge eating ever since and it would get more and more frequent until now Its everyday unless I show intense restraint. But then I burn out and give in because its so intense. I've realised normal people do not have these feelings as intense. I might try vyanse but I'm open to hear anything. I've never talked about this stuff.
submitted by Ambitious_Escape4320 to BingeEatingDisorder [link] [comments]
2024.06.01 13:37 PatroWasTaken 3 hours
Hey everyone, I don't expect anyone to reply to this as it'll probably be shrouded by the other posts. Just needed somewhere to write it all down.
My life has never been good. I've had moments of happiness, even for extended periods of time, but never for longer than a few months at most. I grew up in a horrible environments in and out of CPS where my Mum finally got custody of me at age 3, after I remained in a foster home for around 6 months. My Mom tried so hard for me, even until she won her court case against my birth Father. Until I was around 12, I was raised in a fairly normal environment by myself. Most of my childhood I never endured abuse or anything like that. It wasn't until I was 12, shit got real. At that age, people deemed my problems invalid because I was so young and "it couldn't be that bad" or "other people have it worse". I could never tell my Mum because I didn't want to dissapoint her and make it seem like all her efforts were for naught. As such, I sat alone with my problems, occasionally talking to people online, but nothing helped. When I turned 13, I discovered herbal cigarettes for the first time. I would roll a herb (usually something that produced a relaxing effect or a minor hallucinagen) and smoke it on my porch when my parents weren't home. After I first tried it, I told myself, "It was a good stress reliever, but I'm not gonna do this again. It's bad for me." This cycle repeated daily for around a month. Eventually, my parents found out. Despite my worries, they weren't mad. But the dissapointment in my Mum's eyes were unreal.
This was the moment where I first lost my parents trust.
Eventually, I stopped, as my parents hid everything away from me. Because of this I never wanted to be at my house, so I was with a new group of "friends: I had made. There was this one guy, who I'll name John. John shared a lot of my common interests, and would talk to me during class and we'd hang out at the centre of our city pretty often, just us two messing around and having fun, like a bunch of 8th grade boys. This lasted for a few months. I had one of the best birthdays ever with him. Around a month afterwards, this man somehow tricked me into sending nudes to him. I'm a straight man. I thought this was another one of his jokes and we'd be chill afterwards.
I was wrong.
The next day, I went to school surrounded by weirded stares and comments on the situation. I knew then, that I seriously fucked up bad. I somehow got myself out of the situation by saying it wasn't me, but my friendship with John was diminished. Despite this, he was the only friend I actually hung out with consistently after that. I dealt with his remarks in the times in the future, which grew more and more consistent as the times went on. I knew I had to let him go after he told my principle that I had a weapon on me for self defense (which basically everyone in my city does), which nearly led to me being suspended. Eventually, I abandoned him all together, and ran with whatever little amount of pride I had left. I fell into a huge state of depression after this. Even my online friends didn't want me anymore. Someone had accused me of being a pedophile and falsified screenshots. I had no one.
One day, after school, a friend who I wasn't particularly close with wanted to hang out with me after school. He mentioned his parents had a cabinet full of alcohol.
Seeing no danger with this, I accepted without hesitation. This was my first experience with alcohol. I got wasted with him, and for the first time in months, my worries washed away. Eventually, this became a weekly occurance. I would tell my parents I was going to the park, but instead I would get drunk with my friend. This soon became the only way I could live without stress. Around this time, I became closer with an acuqainted friend and his friend group, who we'll call Terry and his friends. Terry was a chill guy. We didn't share all the same interests, but he liked me for who I was. He didn't care about my past. I became closer with his friends, too. Eventually this became my new friend group. Around the time I formed this new friend group, I stopped going drinking with my other friend. Not because I didn't want to, but because he stopped pestering me to hang out with him like he did the months before. Instead, the roles were reversed at that point. Me and this friend group started hanging out more, and more, and more.
During this time, I met my first love. It was online, but it felt like the best thing in the world. We were young, and stupid. She was beautiful. I remember first talking to her on the phone on the plane ride to my Uncle's wedding. I decided to myself that I really liked this girl. I wanted her more than anything. I remember she was the only thing I dedicated myself for. Something I felt was worth being there for. I finally felt like I had some worth for the first time in forever. I should mention this was slightly before the drinking thing. We talked, we called, we loved for two whole weeks. Towards the end, I made the stupid mistake of telling her that "if I didn't meet her I probably would've killed myself". This wasn't entirely true. I was depressed before talking to her, but I don't think I was suicidal. However, this seemed to be a problem for her. Apparently, she felt trapped. Thus, she left me. I remember having to hide my heartbreak from my parents. I shortly got over it, however, and met a new girl from my school. I realize now I didn't love her, I loved the idea of being in a relationship. I remember joking to my ex about how bad my girtlfriend at the time was. After a while, she found out I was following other girls on instagram. I denied it at first, but discovered it was an opportunity to pin a breakup on her not trusting me enough, so I used that reason and dumped her. She later told the whole school I was unloyal (which I wasn't, I didn't even talk to the girls I followed). She proceeded to post shitty photos of me on her tiktok account. I remember being fuming. If sonething so small was the worst of my problems now, I would be blissful happy right now. A few weeks afterwards, I got back with my first ex. This time, it was one sided. After just over a month, I began to look at girls in my class with desire. I completely broke it off with my ex, telling her I didn't love her anymore. Years later, I still regret this decision. She accepted this, and we remained friends. Every time I felt lonely, I would talk to her again, and we would begin talking like we were together again. This repeated for around 6 months. We kept talking until around a few months ago, where I discovered she blocked me out of nowhere. I believe it was out of respect for her new boyfriend, which I respect.
After we had broken it off for the final time, I began spending time outside of school with my new friend group. Slowly, we began to hang out more and more. I even found a new girlfriend, which I had found off of quick add on snapchat, lol. Around Christmas, things went downhill. My friends asked a personal question, which was whether my girlfriend had sent me explicit pictures (i thought it would make me sound cooler if I said yes), but then they caught me in the lie, and they immediately lost trust for me. I saw the same look in their eyes as I saw in my Mother. Distrust. I tried to salvage the friendship, but I new it wouldn't be the same ever again. It still isn't. I saw the cycle repeat itself. Like last time, I left my girlfriend because I lost interest. I began to become depressed again. I started vaping and drinking to escape the pain. I didn't care as much about my looks anymore. I remember having one of the worst heartbreaks of my life afterwards. I told myself I wouldn't date ever again. I still hung out with my friends, but we all knew inside that we didnt care for each other as much as we acted. For around a month, I lived life in a cycle. A depressed cycle. One day, I caught a glimpse of a girl in my class who was exactly my type in a woman, physically and mentally. I knew she was far too good for me. I barely talked to her, and didn't have her on any social media. I eventually got the courage one afternoon to add her on snapchat, after one of my friends gave me her snap. This was after a mutual friend informed me that she found me attractive, which I didn't buy. The night I added her, we talked, and I rememebr playing games with her and her friends. It was one of the best nights I've ever had. I fucked up my sleep sdchedule just to speak to her longer. I got to know her more, and more. She was the most beautiful and perfect girl in the world. My eternal bliss lasted for a week. I had ordered flowers to ask her out with and I had the whole thing planned out with her friends. I remember going to my first work shift, and coming home, and getting a message from her:
"Hey, I think I'm lesbian. It's not your fault, I promise. I'm so sorry."
I was heartbroken, I kept tryna suffocated myself over and over again. I asked her why, what her thought process was. She eventually tired of my questions and she said that I was being a dick about it. I ended up sending her a message later that day telling her that I was sorry for being a dick about it (I still don't know what I did wrong). I didn't go to school the next day. I remember avoiding her hard for the whole rest of the school term. I was insanely depressed afterwards, the worst I've ever felt. she was the best thing that ever happened to me. I tried weed for the first time afterwards, it was mesmerising. It nearly compared to the feeling of being with her. But it was only a temporary escape. As the weeks went on, I became more and more depressed. Then, my parents found out I smoked weed, and my own mother told the police (I still dont know if thats morally right and im overthinking it) and my whole family found out and now hates me. I'm scheduled to see them tomorrow. I'm being illegally overowkred by my job, and I can;t do anything about it. I didn;t show up today, I'm probably already fired. I tried a cigarette today, it was one last thing I wanted to know before I pass. I went to one last convension today, and asked God for a sign to keep living. I ended up meeting a girl, asking for her number, and she gave me her insta and messaged me "You really thought I'd date you? Not tryna be mean".
In three hours, it'll turn midnight. I'll go to a store, find nitrous oxide, and overdose on that. Asphyxiation isn't that painful. I have nothing at all.
submitted by PatroWasTaken to Suicide_Talk [link] [comments]
My life has never been good. I've had moments of happiness, even for extended periods of time, but never for longer than a few months at most. I grew up in a horrible environments in and out of CPS where my Mum finally got custody of me at age 3, after I remained in a foster home for around 6 months. My Mom tried so hard for me, even until she won her court case against my birth Father. Until I was around 12, I was raised in a fairly normal environment by myself. Most of my childhood I never endured abuse or anything like that. It wasn't until I was 12, shit got real. At that age, people deemed my problems invalid because I was so young and "it couldn't be that bad" or "other people have it worse". I could never tell my Mum because I didn't want to dissapoint her and make it seem like all her efforts were for naught. As such, I sat alone with my problems, occasionally talking to people online, but nothing helped. When I turned 13, I discovered herbal cigarettes for the first time. I would roll a herb (usually something that produced a relaxing effect or a minor hallucinagen) and smoke it on my porch when my parents weren't home. After I first tried it, I told myself, "It was a good stress reliever, but I'm not gonna do this again. It's bad for me." This cycle repeated daily for around a month. Eventually, my parents found out. Despite my worries, they weren't mad. But the dissapointment in my Mum's eyes were unreal.
This was the moment where I first lost my parents trust.
Eventually, I stopped, as my parents hid everything away from me. Because of this I never wanted to be at my house, so I was with a new group of "friends: I had made. There was this one guy, who I'll name John. John shared a lot of my common interests, and would talk to me during class and we'd hang out at the centre of our city pretty often, just us two messing around and having fun, like a bunch of 8th grade boys. This lasted for a few months. I had one of the best birthdays ever with him. Around a month afterwards, this man somehow tricked me into sending nudes to him. I'm a straight man. I thought this was another one of his jokes and we'd be chill afterwards.
I was wrong.
The next day, I went to school surrounded by weirded stares and comments on the situation. I knew then, that I seriously fucked up bad. I somehow got myself out of the situation by saying it wasn't me, but my friendship with John was diminished. Despite this, he was the only friend I actually hung out with consistently after that. I dealt with his remarks in the times in the future, which grew more and more consistent as the times went on. I knew I had to let him go after he told my principle that I had a weapon on me for self defense (which basically everyone in my city does), which nearly led to me being suspended. Eventually, I abandoned him all together, and ran with whatever little amount of pride I had left. I fell into a huge state of depression after this. Even my online friends didn't want me anymore. Someone had accused me of being a pedophile and falsified screenshots. I had no one.
One day, after school, a friend who I wasn't particularly close with wanted to hang out with me after school. He mentioned his parents had a cabinet full of alcohol.
Seeing no danger with this, I accepted without hesitation. This was my first experience with alcohol. I got wasted with him, and for the first time in months, my worries washed away. Eventually, this became a weekly occurance. I would tell my parents I was going to the park, but instead I would get drunk with my friend. This soon became the only way I could live without stress. Around this time, I became closer with an acuqainted friend and his friend group, who we'll call Terry and his friends. Terry was a chill guy. We didn't share all the same interests, but he liked me for who I was. He didn't care about my past. I became closer with his friends, too. Eventually this became my new friend group. Around the time I formed this new friend group, I stopped going drinking with my other friend. Not because I didn't want to, but because he stopped pestering me to hang out with him like he did the months before. Instead, the roles were reversed at that point. Me and this friend group started hanging out more, and more, and more.
During this time, I met my first love. It was online, but it felt like the best thing in the world. We were young, and stupid. She was beautiful. I remember first talking to her on the phone on the plane ride to my Uncle's wedding. I decided to myself that I really liked this girl. I wanted her more than anything. I remember she was the only thing I dedicated myself for. Something I felt was worth being there for. I finally felt like I had some worth for the first time in forever. I should mention this was slightly before the drinking thing. We talked, we called, we loved for two whole weeks. Towards the end, I made the stupid mistake of telling her that "if I didn't meet her I probably would've killed myself". This wasn't entirely true. I was depressed before talking to her, but I don't think I was suicidal. However, this seemed to be a problem for her. Apparently, she felt trapped. Thus, she left me. I remember having to hide my heartbreak from my parents. I shortly got over it, however, and met a new girl from my school. I realize now I didn't love her, I loved the idea of being in a relationship. I remember joking to my ex about how bad my girtlfriend at the time was. After a while, she found out I was following other girls on instagram. I denied it at first, but discovered it was an opportunity to pin a breakup on her not trusting me enough, so I used that reason and dumped her. She later told the whole school I was unloyal (which I wasn't, I didn't even talk to the girls I followed). She proceeded to post shitty photos of me on her tiktok account. I remember being fuming. If sonething so small was the worst of my problems now, I would be blissful happy right now. A few weeks afterwards, I got back with my first ex. This time, it was one sided. After just over a month, I began to look at girls in my class with desire. I completely broke it off with my ex, telling her I didn't love her anymore. Years later, I still regret this decision. She accepted this, and we remained friends. Every time I felt lonely, I would talk to her again, and we would begin talking like we were together again. This repeated for around 6 months. We kept talking until around a few months ago, where I discovered she blocked me out of nowhere. I believe it was out of respect for her new boyfriend, which I respect.
After we had broken it off for the final time, I began spending time outside of school with my new friend group. Slowly, we began to hang out more and more. I even found a new girlfriend, which I had found off of quick add on snapchat, lol. Around Christmas, things went downhill. My friends asked a personal question, which was whether my girlfriend had sent me explicit pictures (i thought it would make me sound cooler if I said yes), but then they caught me in the lie, and they immediately lost trust for me. I saw the same look in their eyes as I saw in my Mother. Distrust. I tried to salvage the friendship, but I new it wouldn't be the same ever again. It still isn't. I saw the cycle repeat itself. Like last time, I left my girlfriend because I lost interest. I began to become depressed again. I started vaping and drinking to escape the pain. I didn't care as much about my looks anymore. I remember having one of the worst heartbreaks of my life afterwards. I told myself I wouldn't date ever again. I still hung out with my friends, but we all knew inside that we didnt care for each other as much as we acted. For around a month, I lived life in a cycle. A depressed cycle. One day, I caught a glimpse of a girl in my class who was exactly my type in a woman, physically and mentally. I knew she was far too good for me. I barely talked to her, and didn't have her on any social media. I eventually got the courage one afternoon to add her on snapchat, after one of my friends gave me her snap. This was after a mutual friend informed me that she found me attractive, which I didn't buy. The night I added her, we talked, and I rememebr playing games with her and her friends. It was one of the best nights I've ever had. I fucked up my sleep sdchedule just to speak to her longer. I got to know her more, and more. She was the most beautiful and perfect girl in the world. My eternal bliss lasted for a week. I had ordered flowers to ask her out with and I had the whole thing planned out with her friends. I remember going to my first work shift, and coming home, and getting a message from her:
"Hey, I think I'm lesbian. It's not your fault, I promise. I'm so sorry."
I was heartbroken, I kept tryna suffocated myself over and over again. I asked her why, what her thought process was. She eventually tired of my questions and she said that I was being a dick about it. I ended up sending her a message later that day telling her that I was sorry for being a dick about it (I still don't know what I did wrong). I didn't go to school the next day. I remember avoiding her hard for the whole rest of the school term. I was insanely depressed afterwards, the worst I've ever felt. she was the best thing that ever happened to me. I tried weed for the first time afterwards, it was mesmerising. It nearly compared to the feeling of being with her. But it was only a temporary escape. As the weeks went on, I became more and more depressed. Then, my parents found out I smoked weed, and my own mother told the police (I still dont know if thats morally right and im overthinking it) and my whole family found out and now hates me. I'm scheduled to see them tomorrow. I'm being illegally overowkred by my job, and I can;t do anything about it. I didn;t show up today, I'm probably already fired. I tried a cigarette today, it was one last thing I wanted to know before I pass. I went to one last convension today, and asked God for a sign to keep living. I ended up meeting a girl, asking for her number, and she gave me her insta and messaged me "You really thought I'd date you? Not tryna be mean".
In three hours, it'll turn midnight. I'll go to a store, find nitrous oxide, and overdose on that. Asphyxiation isn't that painful. I have nothing at all.
2024.06.01 13:34 Mark-JoziZA Awkward moment with my father
I'm 36(M). I'm 5yrs+ sober now, and long may that last. I came home to visit my folks as it's both my Dad and Mom's birthdays in the last two weeks, so figured it'd be nice to come see them.
We played in a charity golf day, with most holes sponsored. Most sponsors had loads of snacks and drinks (heavy focus on shots, cocktails, or they had drinking games (e.g. down a beer, then flip the cup, and if it lands upright, your playing partner goes)). Luckily I'm able to now not worry about the booze on offer, so I really wasn't phased by that aspect - they all had water or soft drinks too.
Anyway, we get to the one hole with the flip cup game, and my dad awkwardly pulls the promotions lady aside and in a stage whisper pretty much announces "we've got a problem here. [My name] can not drink. We need to make a plan", and she sort of scrambled to get a new cup without booze in it. It was so fucking awkward and unnecessary, and as we drove off in the cart after teeing off, as I was about to start speaking to him about it, he said "I know, I know. Sorry."
I explained to him that he needn't make a thing of this, and it is no different to someone ordering a normal drink. Like it's not "special" that when I order, it needs pulling people aside, whispers, pre-checking what options are available (I.e. literally saying: "what drinks do not have alcohol, we need alcohol-free drinks" rather than just asking what soft-drinks they have).
Anyway, I was frustrated at first because I'm living (well, with a good job, healthy lifestyle, happier life) in a different country, and there is no concern when I'm not with them etc., it's like he just panics when I come visit. But I also thought to myself, that I process my alcoholism and recovery lots in my own life/world, but I suppose my folks went through terrible trauma as a result of my problems, and maybe haven't processed it for themselves yet. So I tried really hard to be understanding, but it was still incredible awkward knowing that this shadow may never leave me in their eyes.
So that's a bit of a shit feeling, but I can't control how he thinks. I do really worry that my father is developing memory problems, and I really fear that he may "remember me" from when I was going through dark times (just because those memories are seemingly prominently stuck with him) than who I am now.
Alcoholism will forever be my biggest shame, and because I'm part of quite an old-school minded family/friendship group, it will also be probably something that those closest to me probably feel too. It sucks. Short of upping and leaving, I suppose this is something I'll just have to live with. Anyway, appreciate anyone reading my frustrated ashamed vent. IWNDWYT
submitted by Mark-JoziZA to stopdrinking [link] [comments]
We played in a charity golf day, with most holes sponsored. Most sponsors had loads of snacks and drinks (heavy focus on shots, cocktails, or they had drinking games (e.g. down a beer, then flip the cup, and if it lands upright, your playing partner goes)). Luckily I'm able to now not worry about the booze on offer, so I really wasn't phased by that aspect - they all had water or soft drinks too.
Anyway, we get to the one hole with the flip cup game, and my dad awkwardly pulls the promotions lady aside and in a stage whisper pretty much announces "we've got a problem here. [My name] can not drink. We need to make a plan", and she sort of scrambled to get a new cup without booze in it. It was so fucking awkward and unnecessary, and as we drove off in the cart after teeing off, as I was about to start speaking to him about it, he said "I know, I know. Sorry."
I explained to him that he needn't make a thing of this, and it is no different to someone ordering a normal drink. Like it's not "special" that when I order, it needs pulling people aside, whispers, pre-checking what options are available (I.e. literally saying: "what drinks do not have alcohol, we need alcohol-free drinks" rather than just asking what soft-drinks they have).
Anyway, I was frustrated at first because I'm living (well, with a good job, healthy lifestyle, happier life) in a different country, and there is no concern when I'm not with them etc., it's like he just panics when I come visit. But I also thought to myself, that I process my alcoholism and recovery lots in my own life/world, but I suppose my folks went through terrible trauma as a result of my problems, and maybe haven't processed it for themselves yet. So I tried really hard to be understanding, but it was still incredible awkward knowing that this shadow may never leave me in their eyes.
So that's a bit of a shit feeling, but I can't control how he thinks. I do really worry that my father is developing memory problems, and I really fear that he may "remember me" from when I was going through dark times (just because those memories are seemingly prominently stuck with him) than who I am now.
Alcoholism will forever be my biggest shame, and because I'm part of quite an old-school minded family/friendship group, it will also be probably something that those closest to me probably feel too. It sucks. Short of upping and leaving, I suppose this is something I'll just have to live with. Anyway, appreciate anyone reading my frustrated ashamed vent. IWNDWYT
2024.06.01 13:25 Old-Butterscotch-814 AITA for telling my dad's wife he lied and that I never agreed to visit them for the summer?
I (18m) moved out of my home state two years ago with my mom. My parents are divorced and my dad is remarried and has kids and a stepkid back in our home state. I don't have a good relationship with him so when my mom got an opportunity to move, I told her to take it and bring me with her. A judge agreed that at 16 I was old enough to say I wanted to go and so we went. My dad was really unhappy. So were the rest of his family.
BG: I was 5 when my parents divorced. Dad cheated. He then moved in with his affair partner and they broke up a few months later. So I had a lot of unsettled shit going on then. A couple of months later my dad meets his second wife and her kid who was 1 at the time. They got engaged and married really, really fast. After he moved her in I told him it was going too fast and I asked him to slow down and wait to get married and stuff. He told me it wasn't my decision, he was the adult, he made the choices, and he would do what he wanted and he didn't care how it made me feel because he wasn't going to stay single for me. I never forgot him saying that. The day he did get married is when he realized he had fucked up. Because I "ran away" back home to mom so I wasn't there for the ceremony and I refused to go to the reception either. He told me the day after the wedding that I should really give this a chance and he would prove that this was the best for everyone. But I never wanted to be with my dad from the day he told me what he did to the day mom and I moved. I wished for him to not have custody over me and I never tried to be a part of his family. The rest of them are innocent and I don't hate them or blame them. I just don't care about knowing them. My dad kept hyping me up to his stepkid and later his other bio kids with his wife. So they thought of me as this really cool older brother and they expected a much closer relationship than I wanted to have with them.
When I left it upset them. I got letters and calls from them. I told dad he needed to get it stopped because I wouldn't stay in touch once I was 18.
A few days before my 18th birthday he called me and told me he wanted me to visit for the summer so his family could see me, that his kids missed me. I told him I would not come, not if he paid for everything, not if he begged.
Last week his wife reached out and asked why I hadn't told them my arrival date yet. I ignored her message but then she started calling my mom and to stop her I called her and she asked why I'd go back on my word to visit this summer and how disappointed her kids would be if I didn't show up after they were told I was coming. I told her dad's a liar and I never agreed to visit for the summer. I made it clear I wasn't going to. She got mad and asked me why not and I said I no longer wish to have any contact with them and I ended the call. I then got a bunch of emails sent by her and then by dad who were pissed about what I said.
AITA?
submitted by Old-Butterscotch-814 to AmItheAsshole [link] [comments]
BG: I was 5 when my parents divorced. Dad cheated. He then moved in with his affair partner and they broke up a few months later. So I had a lot of unsettled shit going on then. A couple of months later my dad meets his second wife and her kid who was 1 at the time. They got engaged and married really, really fast. After he moved her in I told him it was going too fast and I asked him to slow down and wait to get married and stuff. He told me it wasn't my decision, he was the adult, he made the choices, and he would do what he wanted and he didn't care how it made me feel because he wasn't going to stay single for me. I never forgot him saying that. The day he did get married is when he realized he had fucked up. Because I "ran away" back home to mom so I wasn't there for the ceremony and I refused to go to the reception either. He told me the day after the wedding that I should really give this a chance and he would prove that this was the best for everyone. But I never wanted to be with my dad from the day he told me what he did to the day mom and I moved. I wished for him to not have custody over me and I never tried to be a part of his family. The rest of them are innocent and I don't hate them or blame them. I just don't care about knowing them. My dad kept hyping me up to his stepkid and later his other bio kids with his wife. So they thought of me as this really cool older brother and they expected a much closer relationship than I wanted to have with them.
When I left it upset them. I got letters and calls from them. I told dad he needed to get it stopped because I wouldn't stay in touch once I was 18.
A few days before my 18th birthday he called me and told me he wanted me to visit for the summer so his family could see me, that his kids missed me. I told him I would not come, not if he paid for everything, not if he begged.
Last week his wife reached out and asked why I hadn't told them my arrival date yet. I ignored her message but then she started calling my mom and to stop her I called her and she asked why I'd go back on my word to visit this summer and how disappointed her kids would be if I didn't show up after they were told I was coming. I told her dad's a liar and I never agreed to visit for the summer. I made it clear I wasn't going to. She got mad and asked me why not and I said I no longer wish to have any contact with them and I ended the call. I then got a bunch of emails sent by her and then by dad who were pissed about what I said.
AITA?
2024.06.01 13:22 Agreeable-Math It's enjoyable to take care of a baby beetle.
 | submitted by Agreeable-Math to wholesomegreentext [link] [comments] |
2024.06.01 13:21 Just_Your_Enemy Coming to a library near you!
 | In the meadow, wild and wide, Lived Becki Bison, with quite a stride. But oh, this bison, what a sight, Loved junk food, morning and night! submitted by Just_Your_Enemy to BeckiJones [link] [comments] Chips and soda, candy galore, Becki would munch and always want more. Grazing the fields? Oh, no way! Snacks and sweets made her day. Friends would say, "Becki, please, How 'bout some grass or leafy greens?" But Becki just laughed, and with a cheer, Opened another root beer. So if you see a bison, round and stout, With a candy bar hanging out her snout, That's Becki Bison, happy as can be, In her junk food jubilee! |
2024.06.01 13:21 debzz_z My (34F) brain thinks I'm cheating, but I'm not
Hello everyone, first of all English isn't my first language, I'm on mobile, and I tend to ramble, so I'm sorry about that. I (34F) am in a short relationship (4 months) with L (28M), he's very kind and sweet, and I'm still adapting to this whole new relationship thing, for this last sentence I'll give you some background. My last serious relationship lasted for 3,5 years between me (24F at the time) and F (21M at the time). It started after we matched on a dating app and we went on our first date. Our first date was crazy perfect, he picked me up on a garden and we went to a tattoo/piercing shop where we got pierced. We talked for hours until evening, and he invited me to eat pizza at his place with his dad lol. It was super late by then, and I lived far far away, so we slept together just cuddling, nothing else. Since then we would meet each other every day. One time (6 months into the relationship) he rear ended another vehicle while going back home. So I decided to move closer to him, because the commute was getting to us. So I did. One week into the new lease, I had an accident and broke my ankle. So he decided that it was better for me to stay at his place to recover (bigger house, access to vehicles, and accessible in general). Three months and two surgeries after I decided it was time for me to go home, but he would convince me to "postpone just one more week" every time, and I would always oblige (I know the little doormat I sometimes am). And things would go like that until I hit the one year mark into that lease. And I said to him "or I move back home or I move definitely here, there's no middle therm", so I moved into his place. I offered to pay rent but he refused. Until this moment the relationship was perfect, his father also lived at that place, and we would always cook together, sing together, go for short trips, etc. But after a while I started to have symptoms of anxiety and depression. Until one day I had a panic attack by just sitting in front of my computer at work. I started to treat that and the doctors said I would have to stop work for a bit, because it was super serious (I don't want to go into too much details for that). At the beginning he was super supportive, but now I know that to have a relationship with someone w/ depression and anxiety it's super hard, 0/10 not recommend. So he and his friends started to be petty to me, and I noticed. One day me, him and his friend went for dinner and I got catchup for me. His friends started to berate me on how catchup is bad for my health and that I should stop using it. I simple replied that every time I see him he is smoking his cigarettes and I never said nothing. Or one time that his friend started to talk bad about gold digger women and insinuate that I was one, because I wasn't working. Before stopping to work I had a career in IT, while my bf had an assistant warehouse job, and I used to earn way more than him (that was never important to me before, honestly). So I said "I know I'm not working, but as soon as I get better I'll earn 4 times more than my bf, so your argument doesn't apply". Just wanted to point out that I had my savings, and I was living off it, paying for food, and other bills. My bf then was very mean and cold to me too, and at one point I asked "Do you want me to move out?" and he said "yes". "After that will you break up with me?" And he said "yes". So I activated my survival mode, and started to work my way into leaving. Between that, and getting a job, I started to pack my things quietly, and applying for jobs. All that while mourning the relationship. For him, I was doing nothing, but I was actually already in the way of signing a new lease, going to interviews and packing my things (and hiding in the house), I wanted to just disappear, I felt humiliated to not be able to leave in the next day after that talk. One day he went after me for sex, and I said "don't be like that, I feel like a piece of meat", he answered "so I'm going downstairs to get some salt then", and from that moment on, all the good feelings I had were replaced by disgust and disdain. A couple days after he asked me what I was going to do on next weekend, because he would go on a trip and wouldn't be home, and I said "nothing". I actually went to help the landlord to clean and paint the new place, since I wanted it to be ready ASAP. And I could move in next Wednesday. When I broke the news to him, he looked surprised and said "already??". So I kinda moved all out in less than a day. After that he would always go after me. I was 27 by then, and from that moment on the idea of a relationship would always make me sick. So I had the crazy teenager phase (since I always had long relationships before) and decided that I would be alone. I started to draw a plan to move to New Zealand, as far away from my ex possible and the plans didn't go through. But 3 years later I moved to Europe, my ex would always send messages saying he missed me, even when he was on a relationship, and in one of my birthdays he sent me a picture from his wallet with my picture in it. I replied politely, but I felt disdain honestly. We haven't talked in years now, honestly, and I'm alright with that. I was single for 7 years icking the idea of going through all that again. Ok, so now, what's happening? I'm 34 now, and I have my cute sweet new boyfriend, and every time he comes here to sleep with me I dream that I sneak out the bed to sleep with my ex. Even though I would never do that, even if he was in other bed next to us. I always feel guilty and dirty, like I'm cheating. I spend the days thinking that I should tell my bf, but I don't want to hurt him. All I feel for my ex is disdain and ick. But I feel like I'm hiding something. What do I do?
TL;DR!: Every time my bf sleeps over, I dream that I sneak out of the bed to go to sleep with my ex, and my brain thinks I'm cheating.
submitted by debzz_z to relationships [link] [comments]
TL;DR!: Every time my bf sleeps over, I dream that I sneak out of the bed to go to sleep with my ex, and my brain thinks I'm cheating.
2024.06.01 13:10 dabi_gaming I think I had a panic attack for the first time but I don’t really know
I’m a 16 year old male, my birthday was a few days ago but that ain’t too important
Basically, about 45 minutes ago, out of random, my chest began to feel tightened and it felt like my heart was beating on my chest like a swat team breaking down a door, my breathing increased rapidly out of nowhere and my vision blurred
I don’t know what triggered it, I do have typical teen problems with anxiety, I won’t say I have depression because I’ve never been diagnosed and I don’t want to be a liar
Recently, i’ve been severely neglecting my health in general, I’ve always had terrible problems with my mental health due to ADHD and my brother and many others suspect me of being autistic(though like with the depression, I refuse to say I do for I’ve not been diagnosed)
For the past three nights I got 2 hours of sleep on the first one, on the second I got four, and it’s already bright out and I’ve still yet to fall asleep
Not to mention I’ve developed a minor caffeine addiction
I really just want to know if this is a normal feeling or what?
submitted by dabi_gaming to PanicAttack [link] [comments]
Basically, about 45 minutes ago, out of random, my chest began to feel tightened and it felt like my heart was beating on my chest like a swat team breaking down a door, my breathing increased rapidly out of nowhere and my vision blurred
I don’t know what triggered it, I do have typical teen problems with anxiety, I won’t say I have depression because I’ve never been diagnosed and I don’t want to be a liar
Recently, i’ve been severely neglecting my health in general, I’ve always had terrible problems with my mental health due to ADHD and my brother and many others suspect me of being autistic(though like with the depression, I refuse to say I do for I’ve not been diagnosed)
For the past three nights I got 2 hours of sleep on the first one, on the second I got four, and it’s already bright out and I’ve still yet to fall asleep
Not to mention I’ve developed a minor caffeine addiction
I really just want to know if this is a normal feeling or what?
2024.06.01 13:09 Late-Green7684 People can meet you and one day they ll say that you are the best person ever and then on the next day, they ll forget about your birthday.
submitted by Late-Green7684 to u/Late-Green7684 [link] [comments]
2024.06.01 13:09 big_b_44 My drunken thesis from last night- read and rip holes in it.
 | Good Morning Y’all! Yesterday was my birthday, and as I celebrated by sneaking a flask of Blanton’s into the new Mad Max movie, then finishing the bottle when I got home….. I had a drunken epiphany I found this morning written on toilet paper from last night. If these two items have been beat to the bush, then just ignore me, but I wanted to share. submitted by big_b_44 to Superstonk [link] [comments]
On to my next toilet paper theory: 2. My sober self has been struggling with wtf RK say to come out of hiding. My drunk self goes fuck it, I am ready to fight, but I want to make sure I win the fight. Here was the theory I came up with on that (insert second picture of sitting up in the chair) The notorious first tweet after 3 years of hiatus and risking body and mind, but why? My theory is he saw GME strongly reject the 200 day moving average (see the last picture) and knew it was time. He was waiting the last years, making memes and that was Cat Signal. Please feel free to tell me I am regarded and shoot holes through my toilet paper thoughts, but this morning when I was going for my whiskey diarrhea and saw that surprise I left myself, I said I had to share it with y’all. |
2024.06.01 13:02 Fire_The_Torpedo2011 Trump protesters shouting "F**K the Queen, f**K the King" at British tourist
I am British, and although I cannot obviously speak for every British person in the world, shouting "f***K the King" at a British person is really lame.
99.9999% of British people couldn't care less about the monarchy. I think the Trump people assume British people are as furiously defensive about our royalty as they are about their King, Trump.
FWIW, I would be in favour of getting rid of the monarchy entirely, as I think it is silly and expensive and outdated, but I don't want them dead or anything either. I think the royalty should just be dissolved peacefully after Charles dies. Though we do get a load of paid holidays when one dies, is crowned, has a birthday, gets married etc etc, so maybe it is worth it after all.
Edit: as an addition, I would say that the main defence in keeping the Royal Family is that they 'bring in lots of tourists'. That is the best way to think of the Royal Family I think. They are for tourists. Like if you have a friend over from the UK and you want to show them all the best bars in New York but the tourist just wants to see Times Square or where Home Alone 2 was filmed.
If you really want to upset a British person, don't shout "f**K the King", shout "Stephen Fry is overrated!" That would just not be on at all.
submitted by Fire_The_Torpedo2011 to thedavidpakmanshow [link] [comments]
99.9999% of British people couldn't care less about the monarchy. I think the Trump people assume British people are as furiously defensive about our royalty as they are about their King, Trump.
FWIW, I would be in favour of getting rid of the monarchy entirely, as I think it is silly and expensive and outdated, but I don't want them dead or anything either. I think the royalty should just be dissolved peacefully after Charles dies. Though we do get a load of paid holidays when one dies, is crowned, has a birthday, gets married etc etc, so maybe it is worth it after all.
Edit: as an addition, I would say that the main defence in keeping the Royal Family is that they 'bring in lots of tourists'. That is the best way to think of the Royal Family I think. They are for tourists. Like if you have a friend over from the UK and you want to show them all the best bars in New York but the tourist just wants to see Times Square or where Home Alone 2 was filmed.
If you really want to upset a British person, don't shout "f**K the King", shout "Stephen Fry is overrated!" That would just not be on at all.
2024.06.01 13:02 Successful-Song-8238 Toxic in-laws, What to do?
I’ve never written a question on this app before but this is eating at me. BUCKLE UP THIS IS LONG!
So my husband’s family have been abusive to him, he is the black sheep of his family he is the youngest and has a different father than his older siblings (8,6 years older).
Ever since I started dating him I was antagonized in some way. When I first met his family for Christmas his middle brother invited his ex-girlfriend to hang out, unbeknownst to my then bf which was awkward but she was fine with me. My boyfriend then was really sick and I took the train 2 hours to pick him up from his home (where his family was with their cars) and take him to a hospital in London. He was there for 6 days not one person visited him but me. They made fun of him and minimized his illness.
Then we moved to my home country the US and eloped. They came to visit a few years later his mom and eldest brother were okay. Middle brother again constantly throwing barbs and digs at me completely unprovoked. I get there may be a culture difference they are White English conservatives, I’m African American. Shortly after we married he dated a black girl, who left bc she was also treated poorly. Some examples of digs; I congratulated him on graduating and asked him when he finished he replied “same time you were supposed to” (I dropped out). Then I asked what the he loved most and what was challenging about being a PT and he replied “no offense, working with fat people.” Took them to multiple meals and covered everything which wasn’t cheap, he complained about the food being “reheated” and bitched when he was ID’d.
Things get progressively worse, middle brother has a precious baby. I want to spoil her and become close with the mother of the child (who is not with him due to his creepy behavior). We form a fast friendship and chat all the time about the baby. My brother in-law tortures this girl denies he is the dad but also goes out of his way to bully her (she’s not breast feeding right, she shouldn’t have pacifiers) all from the comfort of his home. He is also constantly complaining about having to pay $50 a week in child support nonstop saying he is going “bankrupt”. My hubby is part of a group chat and my mother-in-law talks ish about my friend and my hubby is telling me. I ask to see and his brother is actively trying to give his soon to be 1 year old daughter eggs and gluten that his ex told him she was allergic to and they are plotting to do this during her birthday and explicitly NOT tell my friend the mom of his baby. The reasoning was “I’m the father, I deserve to be respected, I can make choices to” but he is extremely sneaky. I show my friend/baby’s mom the messages and all hell breaks loose because of course he lies and gets caught. I would have told him off directly but he blocked me because he was mad at how close I was getting to his ex. I am called a “despicable woman” dragged in their chat, made to seem that I’m spying on my husband and accused of being jealous and sabotaging my niece’s birthday party. My husband says nothing in my defense just goes along like he didn’t send me the photos of their chat…
They don’t know I’m pregnant at this time and I chose not to tell any of my in-laws due to how awful they are. I also don’t believe in telling anyone that would wish ill on me and my baby (bad juju), but my bestie the baby mom knows. I give birth his mom has an absolute tantrum says incredibly awful things to my husband, reaches out to my mom to wish her congratulations on her grandchild and says “i guess I will learn to love him.”
Then my friend the mom gets diagnosed with cancer and wants to keep this secret and makes me promise, she kept my secret pregnancy it is the least I could do. She dies a few months later and my brother in law attacks her for not telling him and claims she is a horrible mother. He takes custody of his daughter.
Fast forward the eldest brother meets this hog woman. She is rotund and English, very ignorant and rude. The first interaction I had she thought she knew so much, decides to bash my dead friend’s parenting, call my dead father in law “weird”, tells me my niece eats everything now due to having a “good parent” and called my apt in NYC “embarrassing” bc it had scaffolding on google maps when she looked me up (like a creep). She then antagonizes me in a variety of slick ways including posting the eldest brother with my niece with the caption “uncle B’s favorite!” On my son’s birthday. Most recently I tell his family that we want to actually have a proper wedding and celebrate after 10 years of marriage, i give them 2 years notice. The hog says “ohhh me and the eldest are planning on getting married then.” I ask why she says “nice weather”. She then proceeds to have a fall wedding (orange, red, greens, pumpkins, barley, wheelbarrows etc.” in May. I try to be the bigger person and send a kind welcome and she leaves me on read.
I hate these people, I need to let this go. My husband says that we should just go on continuing our happy life and not “start problems”. But it feels like so much awfulness to have to swallow. I also feel like if/when I do speak up I’m the hysterical angry black woman and this hog is the “innocent”. The whole thing is so so frustrating but I need to let it go even though I want them to hurt emotionally as much as they have hurt us.
Any recommendations, would you want revenge? There is so much more but I have written a novel already. I feel alone like no one has my back or tries to understand my perspective. They are so sneaky and underhanded. I want to protect my family from these sick people. At the same time I want justice, justice for my husband, for my dead bestie, for me son and for me.
submitted by Successful-Song-8238 to AITAH [link] [comments]
So my husband’s family have been abusive to him, he is the black sheep of his family he is the youngest and has a different father than his older siblings (8,6 years older).
Ever since I started dating him I was antagonized in some way. When I first met his family for Christmas his middle brother invited his ex-girlfriend to hang out, unbeknownst to my then bf which was awkward but she was fine with me. My boyfriend then was really sick and I took the train 2 hours to pick him up from his home (where his family was with their cars) and take him to a hospital in London. He was there for 6 days not one person visited him but me. They made fun of him and minimized his illness.
Then we moved to my home country the US and eloped. They came to visit a few years later his mom and eldest brother were okay. Middle brother again constantly throwing barbs and digs at me completely unprovoked. I get there may be a culture difference they are White English conservatives, I’m African American. Shortly after we married he dated a black girl, who left bc she was also treated poorly. Some examples of digs; I congratulated him on graduating and asked him when he finished he replied “same time you were supposed to” (I dropped out). Then I asked what the he loved most and what was challenging about being a PT and he replied “no offense, working with fat people.” Took them to multiple meals and covered everything which wasn’t cheap, he complained about the food being “reheated” and bitched when he was ID’d.
Things get progressively worse, middle brother has a precious baby. I want to spoil her and become close with the mother of the child (who is not with him due to his creepy behavior). We form a fast friendship and chat all the time about the baby. My brother in-law tortures this girl denies he is the dad but also goes out of his way to bully her (she’s not breast feeding right, she shouldn’t have pacifiers) all from the comfort of his home. He is also constantly complaining about having to pay $50 a week in child support nonstop saying he is going “bankrupt”. My hubby is part of a group chat and my mother-in-law talks ish about my friend and my hubby is telling me. I ask to see and his brother is actively trying to give his soon to be 1 year old daughter eggs and gluten that his ex told him she was allergic to and they are plotting to do this during her birthday and explicitly NOT tell my friend the mom of his baby. The reasoning was “I’m the father, I deserve to be respected, I can make choices to” but he is extremely sneaky. I show my friend/baby’s mom the messages and all hell breaks loose because of course he lies and gets caught. I would have told him off directly but he blocked me because he was mad at how close I was getting to his ex. I am called a “despicable woman” dragged in their chat, made to seem that I’m spying on my husband and accused of being jealous and sabotaging my niece’s birthday party. My husband says nothing in my defense just goes along like he didn’t send me the photos of their chat…
They don’t know I’m pregnant at this time and I chose not to tell any of my in-laws due to how awful they are. I also don’t believe in telling anyone that would wish ill on me and my baby (bad juju), but my bestie the baby mom knows. I give birth his mom has an absolute tantrum says incredibly awful things to my husband, reaches out to my mom to wish her congratulations on her grandchild and says “i guess I will learn to love him.”
Then my friend the mom gets diagnosed with cancer and wants to keep this secret and makes me promise, she kept my secret pregnancy it is the least I could do. She dies a few months later and my brother in law attacks her for not telling him and claims she is a horrible mother. He takes custody of his daughter.
Fast forward the eldest brother meets this hog woman. She is rotund and English, very ignorant and rude. The first interaction I had she thought she knew so much, decides to bash my dead friend’s parenting, call my dead father in law “weird”, tells me my niece eats everything now due to having a “good parent” and called my apt in NYC “embarrassing” bc it had scaffolding on google maps when she looked me up (like a creep). She then antagonizes me in a variety of slick ways including posting the eldest brother with my niece with the caption “uncle B’s favorite!” On my son’s birthday. Most recently I tell his family that we want to actually have a proper wedding and celebrate after 10 years of marriage, i give them 2 years notice. The hog says “ohhh me and the eldest are planning on getting married then.” I ask why she says “nice weather”. She then proceeds to have a fall wedding (orange, red, greens, pumpkins, barley, wheelbarrows etc.” in May. I try to be the bigger person and send a kind welcome and she leaves me on read.
I hate these people, I need to let this go. My husband says that we should just go on continuing our happy life and not “start problems”. But it feels like so much awfulness to have to swallow. I also feel like if/when I do speak up I’m the hysterical angry black woman and this hog is the “innocent”. The whole thing is so so frustrating but I need to let it go even though I want them to hurt emotionally as much as they have hurt us.
Any recommendations, would you want revenge? There is so much more but I have written a novel already. I feel alone like no one has my back or tries to understand my perspective. They are so sneaky and underhanded. I want to protect my family from these sick people. At the same time I want justice, justice for my husband, for my dead bestie, for me son and for me.
2024.06.01 13:02 dmdbdmdbdmdnd Do guys usually talk about ugly girls behind their back?
I have this female friend who is part of a male friend group. My friend tells me that guys are generally quite insensitive and she tells me not to take anything they say seriously but recently, i met this group of guys at her birthday party and they were very polite and cordial to my face. However, I cannot stop being paranoid that they are talking shit about my appearance behind my back.
I was probably the least good looking person at my party (im being objective by the way because my friend is one of the popular kids and most of the people there were popular) but the guys kept pointing to me and whispering. It made me feel kind of sick to be honest because I know for a fact that i was the least attractive person there and they were definitely not attracted to me because there were really some genuinely good looking girls there that could be models.
From the stories my friend tells me of them, it does sound like guys do talk shit about girl’s appearances a lot. Is this true? Or am i being too paranoid
submitted by dmdbdmdbdmdnd to BodyDysmorphia [link] [comments]
I was probably the least good looking person at my party (im being objective by the way because my friend is one of the popular kids and most of the people there were popular) but the guys kept pointing to me and whispering. It made me feel kind of sick to be honest because I know for a fact that i was the least attractive person there and they were definitely not attracted to me because there were really some genuinely good looking girls there that could be models.
From the stories my friend tells me of them, it does sound like guys do talk shit about girl’s appearances a lot. Is this true? Or am i being too paranoid
2024.06.01 12:58 Victoriantitbicycle Do people actually get excited by scotch eggs and cold cocktail sausages at buffets?
Exactly what the title says really.
Whether the office you work at puts on a “spread” to show gratitude to the staff, you’re at a wedding or an elderly person’s birthday party. Do any of you walk into the room and see the spread consisting of scotch eggs (and not nice large ones handmade by a farm shop. The shit miniature ones in a plastic container from Tesco), cold sausage rolls, cold cocktail sausages, egg and cress sandwiches, cheese sandwiches and breadsticks and think “I could not of asked for a better or more imaginative spread of food. I’ve hit the jackpot here”?
So to be black and white, the question isn’t do you get excited at the fact there is a spread full stop and think “great, food! I’m most grateful” but do the contents of that particular spread I’ve mentioned give you a real bounce in your step and an injection of arousal?
submitted by Victoriantitbicycle to AskUK [link] [comments]
Whether the office you work at puts on a “spread” to show gratitude to the staff, you’re at a wedding or an elderly person’s birthday party. Do any of you walk into the room and see the spread consisting of scotch eggs (and not nice large ones handmade by a farm shop. The shit miniature ones in a plastic container from Tesco), cold sausage rolls, cold cocktail sausages, egg and cress sandwiches, cheese sandwiches and breadsticks and think “I could not of asked for a better or more imaginative spread of food. I’ve hit the jackpot here”?
So to be black and white, the question isn’t do you get excited at the fact there is a spread full stop and think “great, food! I’m most grateful” but do the contents of that particular spread I’ve mentioned give you a real bounce in your step and an injection of arousal?
2024.06.01 12:57 More-Bag5408 Is my boyfriend negative or am I cold hearted?
Hi everyone, I need some advice. My boyfriend 26M and I 23F have been dating and living together for around 2 years. I have always been a very easygoing person, while I obsess over my own actions and what I say external stresses don’t bother me as much. I realise not everyone is like that and that people have different things that make them worry. That being said my boyfriend seems to put a negative spin on absolutely everything, it is really starting to drain my energy, but then I feel a bit heartless because maybe I’m too easygoing and should worry more. For example we are meant to be going on holiday for my birthday next week, he has said we will not have a nice time we will only have an ‘alright’ time because he hasn’t saved enough for it. I would understand if he had tried to save but this boy has been buying himself jewellery, me jewellery I specifically asked him not to buy and to save the money for the holiday, shoes, clothes and bags. Now he is miserable because we haven’t got as much money to spend as he hoped (this is not bothering me at all, only how he is going on about it after he caused the issue). Every time I call and ask if he’s alright or how his doing his response is ‘yeah I’m alright, but I’m not’ then it’s the given half hour to an hour of moaning about nothing or problems he’s created for himself which is really just starting to drive me crazy because at some point he has to be responsible for his actions and the consequences of them. Nothing is ever his fault or responsibility it’s always that the ‘devil is out to get him’ ?!? Im religious myself, but we have full power over our actions and he never seems to be able to accept that and stop moaning. These are not the only things he’s miserable about, just the ones annoying me the most at the moment. Am I being a total birch? Someone please let me know. Ty
TL;DR
My boyfriend is negative about everything and it’s making me miserable.
submitted by More-Bag5408 to relationships [link] [comments]
TL;DR
My boyfriend is negative about everything and it’s making me miserable.
2024.06.01 12:54 QueasyStorage637 Looking for novel
Hi I just came across a novel, chosen by the moon novel by izabella W. Its on pay by chapter websites, I've opened and read a few chapters but I can't seem to find any free version or chapter version anywhere. Please help. If anyone has read it I'm willing to take spoilers. Here's the advert I found below of it on Facebook.
Lycanthrope species is a disgusting race. And I, Delan Riley, am nothing more than a human scum in their eyes never expected those species would turn my world upside down. Since when the lycans managed to penetrate our town, like in the early 1900's we have a hierarchy, upper class = the lycans, middle class = mated humans, and lower class = the normal humans, who were basically considered scum. I endured their torment day after day, vowing to run away from them one day, until that day came and everything changed.
Dylan POV "Humans," I scowled at the principal's words from tannoy. "The Alpha twins will be celebrating their birthday tomorrow, as such, festivities are in order." Oh great, the Alphas twin children. Adrian and Arya are the worst lycans alive. I swear just because they are the alphas kids they literally get away with everything. If their birthday is tomorrow, then the wolves are going to be worse than ever. "All students will be present to greet them, two lines will be made, with humans on the left and the lycanthrope on the right. Any mated human will be at the front of the line for their year, you will all also be in order of your school year. That is all." Chat broke out the minute the tannoy was finished. "We haven't had a school gathering since the alpha king visited three years ago, before his sons coronation." Nick was right, the last time we all gathered like that was for the king and queens visit, when he decided to let the world know that he was to renounce his title to his only child, son Josh. "That sick bestard, he wants to make sure everyone is there so those idiot twins can find their mates." Yes I was mad, my fists connected with the table in front of me once more as I thought about how disgusting the situation was. You see the twins will be turning 17, so it's very possible someone in our school could be their mate, finding a mate is sacred to a wolf, the minute they say that one word your fate is sealed. They will turn your mind, morph you into being a lover of their kind, and then you'll give in.
submitted by QueasyStorage637 to romancenovels [link] [comments]
Lycanthrope species is a disgusting race. And I, Delan Riley, am nothing more than a human scum in their eyes never expected those species would turn my world upside down. Since when the lycans managed to penetrate our town, like in the early 1900's we have a hierarchy, upper class = the lycans, middle class = mated humans, and lower class = the normal humans, who were basically considered scum. I endured their torment day after day, vowing to run away from them one day, until that day came and everything changed.
Dylan POV "Humans," I scowled at the principal's words from tannoy. "The Alpha twins will be celebrating their birthday tomorrow, as such, festivities are in order." Oh great, the Alphas twin children. Adrian and Arya are the worst lycans alive. I swear just because they are the alphas kids they literally get away with everything. If their birthday is tomorrow, then the wolves are going to be worse than ever. "All students will be present to greet them, two lines will be made, with humans on the left and the lycanthrope on the right. Any mated human will be at the front of the line for their year, you will all also be in order of your school year. That is all." Chat broke out the minute the tannoy was finished. "We haven't had a school gathering since the alpha king visited three years ago, before his sons coronation." Nick was right, the last time we all gathered like that was for the king and queens visit, when he decided to let the world know that he was to renounce his title to his only child, son Josh. "That sick bestard, he wants to make sure everyone is there so those idiot twins can find their mates." Yes I was mad, my fists connected with the table in front of me once more as I thought about how disgusting the situation was. You see the twins will be turning 17, so it's very possible someone in our school could be their mate, finding a mate is sacred to a wolf, the minute they say that one word your fate is sealed. They will turn your mind, morph you into being a lover of their kind, and then you'll give in.
That won't happen to me, I'm growing old to see the world as it once was, and I'm going to choose who I'll be with. No one will take that dream away from me.
Once dinner was finished, I just wanted to sleep. I'd had a very long tiring day, I quickly sat down on a small stool my mother kept in the storage closet and removed my shirt while my brother Freddy sat at the table to do his simple homework. It wasn't long before my mother came in with a large bowl of warm salt water and some cotton, this was going to sting I just knew it. She was here to help me with the wounds caused by wolves yesterday. She slowly began to unwrap the bandage from around my torso and slowed down drastically when it came to the final layer, I felt it peel off every wound and my fists clenched in pain. "Jesus!" I heard my mom exclaim once the dressing was completely removed. The air on my back was nice though and I sighed as my arm covered my once again exposed brests. "This is more than 15!" I began to hear sniffles coming from her and sighed turning round to look at her face, only to notice tears streaming down it. "Mom I'm fine, it's alright." She shook her head. "It's not alright, I'm your mother I shouldn't let these things happen. I'm so sorry. Your father would have..." here she goes again. Every single time something happened she'd always bring up dad, it really annoyed me because no matter how much we all wish he was here, he just isn't. My father was kiled by THEIR kind, almost 5 years ago when they actually managed to take over. When the lycans managed to penetrate our town my father rose up with some people from the neighborhood, to defend our livelihood, it was futile to say the least. We lost many people and I watched as my dad was ripped apart by two fully shifted wolves, I ended up shoting him to stop his suffering before they dragged me to the courtyard, i was the person to receive the first lashing of the town when I was 12! The wolves have been pretty strict with me since that day. "Stop being stvpid!" Was I harsh? Definitely! Did she need to hear it again, absolutely. "Dad is dead, we don't know what he'd do because he never knew this life. He never knew this world." I know what he'd have done, most likely attacked the guy who held the whip and got himself kiled in the process. "The best thing you can do for me, is stop crying and help me, next time don't insist on helping if you can't handle it." She began to wash my open wounds with the warm salt water causing loud winces to leave me, I knew it was necessary to prevent infection, but my god it hurt like a betch. "Some of these are really deep Dylan!" She sniffed again and my eyes rolled in my head. "I told you, I'm fine, just wrap me back up so I can get to bed." My mom was obviously more impacted by my injuries than I was, I suppose that always the case though. When it's happening to you, you've just got to get through it but when it's happening to someone you love, you just want to take their pain away. She quickly placed a fresh bandage around my waist and chest and wrapped it tightly for compression. The bowl of water that was used was now red in color, I guess from the blood my back was dripping with. "Can you keep your head down please? At least just this week. You can't take any more lashings." I simply nodded before standing up away from the stool, I walked over to Freddie and ruffled his hair in affection. "Good night squirt." He giggled and fixed his hair slightly. "Night Dilly." I smiled walking upstairs to my little bedroom, as soon as I was inside i shut the door and flopped down on to my bed on my stomach and I took a minute to cry to myself at the pain in my back, what my mom did was important but it hurt, not that I'd ever tell her. My hand covered my mouth quickly to muffle any noise I might be making. I couldn't tell anyone, I had to be strong because more and more people were crumpling these days, and my mom would break if she knew how much I was suffering. Sleep followed me shortly after, she was right though about me needing to keep my head down for the time being, I could not take another lashing! After a long night and an even longer morning, we were all finally stood in the hallway at school waiting for the twins to arrive. "Mine!" Everyone that was stood in the hallway tensed up, as we were seniors, me and Nick were stood towards the very back of the human line. All the mated people were situated directly opposite their wolf mates in their years. We stayed silent and still as Arya walked down the hall and stopped directly in front of Nick. His eyes widened in fear, unsure of wether to look up or keep his head lowered. "Look me in the eye, mate." He glanced at me slightly as if asking what he should do. "I said, look me in the eye." He slowly moved his eye line up to look at her face. I took a glance myself to see her eyes pitch black with lust. "I... can't... I mean... erm." Before he was able to mutter anything else, two wolves from opposite, grabbed him out of the line and dragged him behind Arya. "Hey!" My head shot up before I could stop myself. My mouth also forgot its place as I jumped out of line. Everyone's head shot to me as my eyes widened in realization at what I'd done. Adrian, the other twin, walked up to me before punching me right in the stomach, I doubled over instantly. Feeling the sting in my slightly healed back. "I know you... You were publicly flogged only two days ago." God I hate this guy. "I also have it on good authority, that you openly spoke out against our rules and regulations in yesterday's class." My head shot down the line slightly to see Erin, looking a little frightened, her mate, the beta to be was looking at her, nodding his head in reassurance. "You traitor, you grassed on your own kind?" I yelled at her before feeling a fist connect with my cheek. My head whipped to the side from the force, while my class members gasped. I'm so done with this treatment, right then, I wasn't in charge of my actions. My fists curled up and my stance became a lot more defensive. My head snapped up to the alpha to be, and I looked him in the eye. "You don't know the meaning of the word disrespect." I suddenly hurled my fist towards his head, which he easily dodged, but my foot came up and kicked him instead. He stumbled backwards from the force with wide eyes. "You... you Actually hit me!" He didn't even sound annoyed, more shocked. Everyone in the hallway was watching, waiting for the alpha to do something but instead he simply stood up straight, regaining his composure. "I think everyone should get back to class." He began to walk away, following his sister when I called him back. "What about Nick?!" "Simple, He's my sisters mate. He now belongs to her." Argh, he's not an object. "He's not her property." A chuckle left his mouth, before turning his back to me again. "All humans are property." A short while later everyone made it to science class, our teacher Mrs Mathews is mated to the lycans pack doctor, she also now has a four and two year old with him. She was one of the first humans to be cohered into a false relationship. "What were you thinking young lady?" I rolled my head at her before looking at the empty seat next to mine. Nick was with that stvpid wolf girl right now. Being changed, I'm so angry it's ridiculous. "I was thinking, this guy is being a prick. Did you hear him? 'All humans are property.' It's bull shet." I looked up and the whole class looked at me like I had three heads. Talking shet about wolves is one thing, but talking about an alpha is punishable by death, attacking an alpha is an even worse offense. There was then a knock at the door and in walked Erin and her band of mated bestards. "Sorry we're late Mrs." "Erin, how are things between you and bata Monroe?" She blushed, the traitor actually blushed at the mention of his name. "He spoke to me last night about trying for a baby. We need a good strong boy to take over as beta." I scoffed looking at her as she took her seat. "You guys are actually pathetic, why can't it be a girl? Those mutts are basically Neanderthals" I voiced my opinion and saw all the shocked faces around me. Calling the lycans mutts, is the same as them calling us scum. After lesson had ended the entire school was called into the hall for assembly. This is where any human who has been found to have broken the rules were punished, usually 10 lashings were goven out or something similar. "Welcome to the school assembly, congratulations to the alpha twins for finding both your mates. Now on to the business at hand, as the 5 year anniversary of the new world is coming up, we have been informed that the alpha king will be visiting our district next week, this is very exciting news. We want you all to look your absolute best, she wolves and mated females will wear exemplary dresses made by seamstress. Male wolves and mated men will wear tailored suits. Anyone who doesn't comply will be reprimanded." The Alpha King?! No one has met him yet, he took over the throne three years ago when he turned 18. He really didn't make any appearances though, great, this month is going to be a nightmare. "As for the humans, you will be given a new uniform to wear for the visit, these are to be neatly ironed and worn to the highest standard. As for the following humans, based on your attitude this past week, you will be coming to the front and facing punishment. Tony summerset?!" Tony's head shot up as he looked around, he was in the year below but he shared my views when it came to the lycans. He slowly walked up to the front of assembly, almost instantly his top was t0rn in two and he received 10 lashings. A girl named Kara was next and she too received 10 lashings. A few more people went up slowly accepting their fate then suddenly my name was called. "Dylan Riley." Inside I was terrified but I simply shrugged my shoulders, I guess I did kind of expect this. Although I'm not sure if my back can take any more damage. "You attacked an alpha, correct!" His eyes bored into mine as I bowed my head submitting to his authority. "Technically, no." Everyone in the school gym looked on in fear, as my head moved to the front row of the wolf side. Adrian sat, with a werewolf girl in the year below, her name was Jana, I guess he found his mate. Nick and Arya were no where to be seen though. Adrian gave me a shrug as if to say he didn't tell, before smirking at my comment. "He hasn't officially taken the alpha title yet, so he's just..." i looked at the principle and noticed his eyes black and his claws out, he was in what lycans call a half shift, triggered when the subject has become angered. He turned to two security wolves and gave them a nod, Almost immediately i was forced onto my knees, my arm was slammed on a table and held in place by one wolf, while my body was held in place by the other. "Ok, I don't think this is needed, I have alpha blood, a stvpid human girl can't hurt me." My head snapped to Adrian who had stood up in front of the school to stop what was happening. "Nevertheless, humans need to know their place." With that the pressure on my arm increased as our principals hand pulled my sleeve up before a long claw punctured my skin. The searing pain shoting from the fresh wound had my eyes scrunched and my fist clenched, I bit the inside of my cheek hard instantly tasting blood, however no sound left my mouth. He continued to write, using my skin as a canvas and his claws as a marker, it went on forever, my vision blurred slightly at one point as I turned my head away. After minutes of torture, he was done and the pressure on my arm eased, instantly I snatched my arm away, hissing through my teeth at the pain. I was about to scurry off stage, when I was roughly grabbed yet again, my arm being held in the air by the principal while my feet were inches off the floor, blood dripped from the wound and the pattern he had made was on show for everyone to see. Loads of people gasped, even the wolves looked slightly horrified at what had happened. "This is what happens when a human decides to speak out. I can promise, anyone who so much as says one word about our way of life, will have the same punishment." My arm was starting to seriously ache from being held in the air for so long, and the lack of blood flow to my suspended arm was causing me pins and needles, still I refused to make a sound. I held the tears back and I bit my cheek harder causing more blood to fill my mouth. "That's enough Bradley!" Adrian growled, he was still stood up and looking at the scene in front of him. His eyes hard as he stared at the principal a low warning growl erupted from his chest which had the head teacher gulping, he quickly let go of my arm causing me to crash to the floor. A small cry left my mouth as I hit the hard floor. Immediately I scrambled away, my foot just missed the high step leading to the stage and I fell, waiting for the impact of the ground, but it never came. Two strong arms wrapped around me catching my weak body causing me to look up, my eyes widened as I noticed Adrian had caught my falling form. "This isn't part of the human punishment program!" Adrian growled causing me to tense in his grip, I pushed him away from me before fixing my uniform top. The room was deadly silent, taking in the scene in front of them, while I stole a glance at my forearm. Carved into my skin by his devastating claws were two words, words that would most definitely scar my body for life. 'Human scum' "Lessons must be learned, she received lashing merely two days ago, and clearly it had no effect on her." Another growl left Adrian's chest as he stepped on to the stage, I wasn't bothered though, you would think I'd be ashamed but I simply smiled slightly. I fixed my sleeve a little so it wouldn't rub on the fresh wound before speaking. "It doesn't matter," the whole room looked at me shocked by my attitude. "I would rather be labeled human scum, than have any resemblance to your kind. I'm proud of what I am, how many of you can say that?" After my amazing little speech, I walked right down the middle between the humans and lycans and out the door. No more compliance, I'm going to get away with as much as I can without getting into too much bother. There will come a day when the lycans power will fizzle out. When it does I'll be ready, I'll be waiting for the day we take our world back. As for the best part about my plan...No one can stop me.
"Ouch, not so hard." I seethed as the school nurse cleaned my new wound with antiseptic. "If you had of just kept your mouth shut, this wouldn't have happened." I turned to my right looking out the window at the few clouds that were floating in the blue sky. "Like I said, I'm proud to be human, and now everyone knows what I am." I clenched my fist together as the nurse began wrapping a bandage around my forearm. It had been a good few hours since the incident in the hall, and I had been forced to come to the nurces office after I had tried to clean my wound by splashing it with water from the tap, it also refused to stop bleeding. "You are impossible. Can you please just try and stay out of trouble? For one day, that's all I ask." Our school nurse is a wolf, she's one of them. However she hates the way they treat us mere humans, she thinks we should all just live in peace with equal rights. Like that would ever happen. "All I've done is stay out of trouble, but you are just going to humiliate me anyway, so what's the actual point?" "The pack were discussing a public execution, Dylan. You need to walk on egg shells from now on, not just for you but for your family as well." No ones been publicly executed in over 4 months, I'm flattered they're considering it. They only execute people who they believe are the biggest problems to society. "Well then... I'm flattered." I chuckled, before looking at the patch job. 'Huh, not too shabby.' I quickly stood up from the human nursing station and pulled the sleeve of my shirt down covering the evidence of ever being hurt. "This is serious!" I just gave her a blank look before leaving the room. On the way out I heard her call back to me. "Please just think about it." I gave a clipped nod as I walked away wondering how I'm going to tell my mom about this. Later in the evening... "Dilly why you say that?" Freddie looked up at me with a mouth full of bread. "Don't speak with your mouthful!" My mom scolded him as a bashful blush made its way to his cheeks. "Sowwy mommy." His reply was muffled as he swallowed the last chunk of food. "I said it Freddie, because it's the truth. The wolf race are a pathetic excuse for..." my mom cut me off with an extremely stern look. "Dylan! They have ears everywhere, one more word out of you and it's your room." I scowled, my hatred for the Lycan kind growing stronger as each day passes. "What more can they do to me, lash me? Beat me? Brand me? They've ran out of options." I stated slamming my hands down, then severely regretting it as sharp pain shot though my wound. "What was that?" My head shot to regard my mothers worried expression. Her eyebrows were raised and her eyes were dull and judging as she looked at me. "Nothing, it was nothing." I quickly took my plate in my hand and began to walk to the kitchen. "I'm not really hungry, and I have homework to do!" My mom caught hold of my forearm causing me to drop my plate suddenly, I watched it slowly fall before shattering on the floor. I retracted my arm quickly and turned to Freddie. "Stay there and don't move until it's cleaned up ok sport?" He just nodded with wide eyes, I turned back to my mom and noticed her curious stare on my arm. Her grip shifted to the other side as she turned it around before pulling my sleeve up. The bandage was showing and a bit of blood was seeping though after the wound had been disturbed. "What the hel happened?" My moms eyes widened as she began to fumble with the bandage. Before she could unravel any of it I snatched my arm away. "I had an accident at school. No big." I began to gather the large pieces of the broken plate up ready to put them in the bin. "What did you do Dylan?" She looked at me with pure worry and only then did I realize what the wound must look like to someone who didn't know. "For gods sake! I didn't do it to myself! I got publicly punished at the assembly alright? It's no big deal." Her face dropped instantly and she stepped towards me, causing me to step backwards. "Mom, I'm ok. So back off will you." "What did you do? I've never known them to cut someone's arm as a punishment." Her shock and accusation was evident in her voice and I sighed heavily. "I spoke against the alphas son." I may have hit him too, but I wasn't going to divulge that part to her. "It's not one big cut, mom, it's a brand, 'human scum' carved onto my arm." "They've branded you now too?!" My eyes rolled at her hurt tone as I went to get the dustpan and brush. "You're so much like your father." A sigh left her mouth as she spoke, running a hand through her hair, while I quickly swept up the little pieces of the broken plate. "You've had a new uniform delivered. It's laid out on your bed. Dylan, Please just try and stay respectful in the future, I don't want my daughter to be completely mutilated. Although you're not far off." "Gee, Thanks." I then walked over to my little brother Freddy before blowing a kiss into his neck and hearing him giggle. "So sport, how's school going?" "It's ok." He shrugged before going back to coloring a dinosaur picture in. "Well that's good, stay out of trouble, ok little man?" Heading upstairs and into my room, my thoughts wandered to the permanent graffiti scar very slowly healing on my arm. Disgusting beasts. Think they own the world because they're faster, stronger and can shift. Pah. If you ask me they are not all that.The second I walked into my room my mouth dropped open. On my bed was some grey pants laid out neatly, which wasn't the surprising part, no, what shocked me was the grey high neck no sleeved button down shirt, every single set of uniform had sleeves except this one. They've done this on purpose those, mutts. They want the world to see my arm and know what a disgusting creature I am. They want the world to know that I, Dylan Riley, am nothing more than 'human scum'.
During the last week, I've been horrible, in class I've been loud in voicing my views, I've insulted at least everyone to some degree, I didn't care about the consequences, and I certainly didn't think about them. I haven't seen Nick at all since he was claimed, and to make matters worse today was the royal visit. Oh yes, werewolves and mated humans alike were spending every waking minute preparing themselves to meet his royal majesty, king of the wolves. Unclaimed Humans however would rather stick pins in their eyes. "Dylan, get down now... you're going to be late." She was right, I was dawdling this morning, I really couldn't be bothered today, I gave myself one last look in the small mirror and sighed when my eyes met my newly uncovered brand. It had bad bruising around the letters, and was still extremely tender to touch, it was definitely healing now though. I made my way down the stairs and came face to face with my mother who was seeing to Freddie, she was helping my brother get his coat on when she turned to me. "You ready sport?" Freddie nodded his little head at me and smiled while I quickly slid my shoes on. "Just Remember, the alpha is bad enough, Dylan, please, please don't do anything to anger the king." My mother stopped us from walking out the door to tell me something she had been telling me continuously for the last couple of days, it was almost as if the entire human population of our district was expecting me to do something stvpid. "Try and have a good day." I rolled my eyes but nodded, even I know not to push the king, he could kil me in the hallway like it was nothing. In fact I plan on staying out of his way for the entirety of the day. "We will see you tonight mom." I stated before me and my brother began our walk to school, his little hand clutched my own tightly as we went. Usually Nick would be with us, as he lives next door, well he used to, now he's residing in the main pack house. I quickly dropped Freddie off at his school and watched him get the wolfsbane neutralizer before walking into him building giving me a small wave before he went in. With my new scar on complete show, and my figure being complimented by the skin tight shirt I was wearing, I sauntered down the street to school, I gave my name and year in and took the wolf's bane neutralizer injection with no problems at all. It was finally getting into school that the problem occurred. Walking through the halls I was met by many looks, some of pity some of disgust. You see every single non mated human in the school was wearing a long sleeved version of the uniform I was given. All the Wolves and mated couples were scattered around in fancy floor length dresses or tailored suits. As I turned the corner I noticed a couple, now this couple happened to catch my eye the most out of all of them because it consisted of Arya and Nick, eating each other's faces off. "What the hel!" Nicks head shot to me as his eyes widened. He too was dressed in a tailored suit, a navy blue tie hung on his neck to match Aryas dress. Why was this happening all the time? It's always my friends that get completely brain washed. I shook my head in disbelief before turning my back on him. I heard his fast footsteps behind me as I rounded the corner. "Dylan?!" He ran right in front of me, stopping me in my tracks, making me drop my bag off my shoulder and almost causing me to bump into him. "Let me just explain..." "Has she marked you?" I mean you could almost see it in his eyes, she had marked him, and knowing the way life goes he's probably even mated with her. "Actually... Don't even answer that." I aggressively picked my bag up off of the floor and stormed off down the hall. "Dylan, just listen to me, Erin was right, it's so hard to resist your soulmate, and Arya is actually ok once you get to know her." I just kept walking, he caught up to me walking beside me but it didn't matter, I completely ignored everything and everyone. 'I'm so not in the mood today' getting into class was good though, I said hello to Mr Foley and took my usual seat. Nick sighed then took his bag off ready to sit next to me, but I snapped before he had the chance. "Traitors and mated idiots sit on that side of the room." I didn't look him in the eye as I pointed to a seat right at the front of the classroom on the opposite side. His eyes widened as he turned his attention back to me. "You can't be serious Dylan." I gave him a blank look before grabbing my book out of my backpack, I placed it on the desk then began to write the date on the top line. "I've sat in this seat for as long as I can remember." I ignored him, his voice sounded sad and shocked. "Dylan? Wait! What is that?!" Before I could react Nick had grabbed hold of my branded arm and turned it to see the letters. "Oh my God! What happened?" I snatched my arm away from him and shrugged as I continued to write in my book before grabbing my water bottle out of my bag. "The principal happened, it was my punishment for speaking out against Adrian and Arya. I wear it with pride." He just held a complete look of disbelief. "You spoke out against them?" I shrugged, what did he think I'd do. "It's no secret that I despise this stvpid new world and the mutts that control it. You were my friend, I wasn't going to let them just take you without saying something, although that is exactly what you seem to have done. Enjoy the view from your new seat!" "Don't be like that, Dylan, I'm your best friend, I'm sorry about your arm, but..." my eyes rolled inside my head at my friends words. "Anything with the word 'but' in, isn't an apology, it's a rationalization." I took a drink of water from my bottle and kept my eyes facing forward, ignoring his every attempt to try and talk to me. "Dylan?.. Dylan?... Do you know what? Erin is right, if you push us all away you won't have any friends left." He huffed before walking over to the empty seat and sitting down, I could feel him glancing up at me every now and again but I didn't respond. "Good morning class, please settle down." He looked at me then at Nick and frowned, we've never sat apart, we were friends before the new world even began. I just shook my head telling him to forget it. "So... as you know the king will be arriving in a short while, but until then lessons will go on as normal." Its funny seeing teachers in the same uniform your wearing, mr Foley and his wife are the coolest. Human teachers and doctors only have slightly more respect than we do. Because of Mr Foley's status him and his wife have better access to food and drink, Mrs Foley is cool, sometimes she even makes sure mr Foley brings some in for me. Ya know, coz I'm their favorite student. It's not in a weird way, it's just they were friends of the family before the new wold took effect. Mr Foley and my dad were buddies from high school, so it goes without sayin really. "All the mated humans will be at the front of each years line again, after that you will all be placed in status, Nick, as your mated to Alpha Arya, you'll be at the front of your line. Dylan as you have been branded..." his voice trailed off as he looked at me. "Yeah yeah, I'll be at the back of the line behind everyone. I get it." I huffed, moving my sight towards the window once more. "I am sorry." I turned to face Mr Foley again, he looked genuinely upset and that look of pity wasn't something I wanted to see. I gave him a clipped nod then turned away again. "Anyway, on to the subject matter, 'Of Mice and Men, page 64, Nick why don't you start us off with the reading.""Of course sir." Nick began reading the book but I switched off, today is going to be a long day. After almost an hour and a half of reading comprehension, the bell chimed signaling lunch. I shot up and out of the classroom before anyone could say anything. Today, I was avoiding drama like the plague.
I wandered the corridors straight to the lunch hall. All the people I would normally hang out with we're all mated so I grabbed my lunch quickly, and sat down at the end of the human table. Let me lay the lunch hall out for you. On one side of the room you have two long rows of tables, with simple benches that make it look like prison, on the other side of the room you have multiple round tables with fancy chairs. Yup you get it. The humans sit at the prison tables and the wolves and traitors sit on the fancy tables, they get fancy food, fancy drink and most importantly they get pudding. what I would give to have some pudding. "Dylan can we just talk?" Nick quickly took the spot next to me as he set his lunch tray down. I looked at his food which had been placed on a ceramic, circular white plate. God that looked good. I sighed knowing he was going to talk anyway. "Fine, you have two minutes." I used my fork to take a bit of pasta off his plate and shoved it into my mouth. God that was good. "After I left school, I was taken to the pack house with Arya, and I really got to know her. It took a few days for me to finally accept being with her, but ever since life has been ok, and the sax... well that's a whole other story." Eww, I didn't need that mental image in my head. "I'm glad your happy." I stated before deciding I had no appetite. His face held shock before he sighed in relief. "That means a lot Dylan, I mean you know that your opinion matters to me." I cut him off before he could say anything else. "I said I was glad your happy. I didn't say I approved of what you've done. You've basically turned into one of THEM, I can't ever forgive you for that." He looked hurt, but I couldn't care less about his feelings. He placed his hand gently on my arm and went to open his mouth when a growl sounded out. All heads whipped to where it came from, Arya was stood holding a glass of soda and a plate, she was looking right at me and Nick and I would totally be dead if looks could kil. Nick quickly retracted his hand, his whole face fell and you could see sorrow flood his irises. "You sit with me now, get away from that, that... scum!" Wow, Nick was such a lucky guy. NOT. "You heard her. Get away from me, go sit with your new friends. I'm happy for you, and I understand where your coming from, but don't come up to me again and pretend you didn't betray your own kind. Don't pretend you didn't betray me." I shoved a little bit of food into my mouth before standing up and walking out of the cafeteria, leaving my tray on the table. I was walking through the hallway to the classroom, you see I decided to spend lunch with Mr Foley in his room, when I happened to hear voices in the corridor. "Is it wise for her to actually be present when the king arrives? Surely she could be placed in the dungeons, it might actually teach her some respect?" My principal was speaking to the alpha of our district, huh, if I stayed and listened do you think they'd notice, maybe they could smell me?! "Everyone is to be present, if the Riley girl does one thing out of line she will be dealt with severely, child or not. That girl has been a blight to the district since day one, she's dangerous, if she puts one hair out of place I will personally break her into submission." Oh shet, they were talking about me specifically, and they mentioned the dungeon, that's not been used in months. Normally I would have listened in more but something about the entire situation didn't sit right with me, all of a sudden, I was on edge, and simply wasn't interested in the slightest in hearing how my misery was to be enhanced. I backed up slightly before turning around and bumping head first into one of the hottest man I had ever seen. I lost my balance immediately and fell straight on to the floor letting out a small grumble in the process. His eyebrows knitted together quickly and his breath hitched in his throat as he looked upon my fallen state and gasped. "Mate!" He whispered, his eyes fixated on mine. Now, I had seen and heard that many times to know what that means, I gasped before taking a step back. 'No, no, no, no, no. This can not be happening.' He growled slightly before stepping towards me. Oh Shet!2024.06.01 12:45 NoGas8462 TIFU by encouraging my dying grandmother to live on
Obligatory this started more than 2 years ago. I live with my grandmother, my father lives with his own family an hour away.
Grandmother fell ill and hid it from all of us. When we found out, she refused to have herself checked and this went on for months as her condition got worse and worse. Any attempts to urge her to get checked would be met with yelling and snapping back, even items being thrown at people, it didn't matter if you were her son or grandson.
Eventually she ended up at the point where she couldn't even stand, she told me she wanted to die already. Now this grandmother of mine terrorized me my whole life, she tried kicking my mother and I during my childhood multiple times because she hated my mother, she would instigate fights with me and lie that I hit her or yelled at her siblings and my father. But I felt like I couldn't just watch her wither away, nor did I just want to stand idly and watch my father break down more and more at the thought of losing his mother.
So now at her most vulnerable, I cared for her, I moved into her room to watch over her. I urged her to keep living, I told her the family wouldn't want her gone and that she's still strong and can fight it. Long story short after a month she agreed to go to the hospital. It's cancer, we're too late and its terminal, but they chose to operate anyway and it was a success they removed as much as they could, but nothing could be done with the cancer that has reached her head. The doctors did everything they could and they believe she'll have a few more years to live her life. My dad dedicates the next year of his life to being with her and taking care of her, along with hiring 2 personal nurses to attend to her other needs as she refuses to allow me or my father bring her to the toilet for example.
Fast forward a year later, we find out that she's been talking shit behind my father's back. Soon enough, whenever he's around she badmouths his wife (my parents are now divorced) to his face and openly says that my half-sister isn't her grandchild. This goes on for months more until on my birthday she wakes up, gets out of her room, causes a scene and badmouths my father's wife and daughter to their face. This was the last straw, my father no longer drove over everyday to be with her, he still pays for her medicines and nurses but he told me he can't face her anymore, it was too much after everything he's done for her the past year+. I try to mediate but my grandmother sees no issue. After all, according to her she only badmouthed the wife and kid, not my father.
Today her favorite nurse went home to take a 1 week vacation, a temporary nurse came in to take her place. She has yelled at both nurses to fuck off and leave the room. Both aren't allowed in, she smells like shit because she refuses to let anyone change her diaper and whenever I try to convince her she just yells. As with before, she refuses anyone not female to clean her or take her to the bathroom, I am male.
More than 100k+ USD spent the past 2 years solely on her, that amount of money in my country you could live comfortably for years, 2 years of trying to give a dying old lady a good last few years, ends up here. With a smelly, angry, spoiled grandmother who refuses to listen to me once again. One who has told my father he can fuck off if he wants as long as he keeps paying for her nurses and medication.
I'm back on my anti-depression meds, and I'm having a thought worse than suicide. I'm regretting having convinced my grandmother to live, I should've let her die like she wanted. I feel like a complete asshole for thinking of it, but she's caused endless problems for her nurses, my siblings and I, my parents, her own siblings and many others in these two years.
TL;DR: I convinced my dying grandmother to get treated despite the fact that she is a horrible person. 2 years later she's an even worse person than before and I'm learning the lesson that sometimes some people should be left to die.
submitted by NoGas8462 to tifu [link] [comments]
Grandmother fell ill and hid it from all of us. When we found out, she refused to have herself checked and this went on for months as her condition got worse and worse. Any attempts to urge her to get checked would be met with yelling and snapping back, even items being thrown at people, it didn't matter if you were her son or grandson.
Eventually she ended up at the point where she couldn't even stand, she told me she wanted to die already. Now this grandmother of mine terrorized me my whole life, she tried kicking my mother and I during my childhood multiple times because she hated my mother, she would instigate fights with me and lie that I hit her or yelled at her siblings and my father. But I felt like I couldn't just watch her wither away, nor did I just want to stand idly and watch my father break down more and more at the thought of losing his mother.
So now at her most vulnerable, I cared for her, I moved into her room to watch over her. I urged her to keep living, I told her the family wouldn't want her gone and that she's still strong and can fight it. Long story short after a month she agreed to go to the hospital. It's cancer, we're too late and its terminal, but they chose to operate anyway and it was a success they removed as much as they could, but nothing could be done with the cancer that has reached her head. The doctors did everything they could and they believe she'll have a few more years to live her life. My dad dedicates the next year of his life to being with her and taking care of her, along with hiring 2 personal nurses to attend to her other needs as she refuses to allow me or my father bring her to the toilet for example.
Fast forward a year later, we find out that she's been talking shit behind my father's back. Soon enough, whenever he's around she badmouths his wife (my parents are now divorced) to his face and openly says that my half-sister isn't her grandchild. This goes on for months more until on my birthday she wakes up, gets out of her room, causes a scene and badmouths my father's wife and daughter to their face. This was the last straw, my father no longer drove over everyday to be with her, he still pays for her medicines and nurses but he told me he can't face her anymore, it was too much after everything he's done for her the past year+. I try to mediate but my grandmother sees no issue. After all, according to her she only badmouthed the wife and kid, not my father.
Today her favorite nurse went home to take a 1 week vacation, a temporary nurse came in to take her place. She has yelled at both nurses to fuck off and leave the room. Both aren't allowed in, she smells like shit because she refuses to let anyone change her diaper and whenever I try to convince her she just yells. As with before, she refuses anyone not female to clean her or take her to the bathroom, I am male.
More than 100k+ USD spent the past 2 years solely on her, that amount of money in my country you could live comfortably for years, 2 years of trying to give a dying old lady a good last few years, ends up here. With a smelly, angry, spoiled grandmother who refuses to listen to me once again. One who has told my father he can fuck off if he wants as long as he keeps paying for her nurses and medication.
I'm back on my anti-depression meds, and I'm having a thought worse than suicide. I'm regretting having convinced my grandmother to live, I should've let her die like she wanted. I feel like a complete asshole for thinking of it, but she's caused endless problems for her nurses, my siblings and I, my parents, her own siblings and many others in these two years.
TL;DR: I convinced my dying grandmother to get treated despite the fact that she is a horrible person. 2 years later she's an even worse person than before and I'm learning the lesson that sometimes some people should be left to die.