Benton county wa jail roster

I'm really wanting to take my DUI 1st offense to trial as it's a misdemeanor and in a small small town with 1 prosecutor whose also the DA.
For context:
The cops here are known for just pulling people over and handing out citations at a whim. Even the county DA's office laughed at me when I asked for a court date for tickets directly before getting the DUI charge. She said they don't assign court dates for tickets or lesser offenses bc they get so many and if they gave dates the court system would get bogged down.
I'm guessing most just pay the fine and move on, but I strongly believe in exercising my rights. I also wasn't drinking the night in question when I was accused of DUI. Worst case scenario they give me 24 hrs in jail, which I've completed half already, and probation. Best case scenario is I beat the prosecution as a pro se attorney and maybe effect slight change in the area.
Now back to the original reason for the post. I have a decent grasp on the criminal system and how court works. Tbh I think this would be the best way to gain experience for me and anyone looking to help.
I'm not looking for someone to represent me at all. More so if I have a 3rd or 4th party pointing to things I'm not seeing in my case.
I already have the discovery and so far they have no evidence for the traffic infractions alleged as the reason for the stop. The only thing I see in the videos is me fumbling over words or possibly the officers body cam interfering with the audio or mic for the first 2 questions the officers asked me. Then from there I sound fine and when he asks me out the car and to perform the tests I did great and no more audio distortions.
The officer performing the tests and ultimately arresting me was breathing extremely heavy during the majority of the interaction and he's not a heavy set guy nor had he been exerting physical exercise. I also think he lied about the reasons for the stop (me crossing a yellow line) because in the US the Supreme Court just ruled that officers cant stop someone after only running their plates and seeing a license suspended as the owner of the vehicle may have loaned the car out.
Officer also wrote a poor report leaving out a lot and lying on other things. I think it'll be fun on cross, when or if he even shows up to trial.
If anyone's serious about digesting the evidence and lending some advice we can continue to talk.
If this is not allowed or if I need to post more in the original post please let me know.
Thank you all for taking the time to read and help.
Edit: I'm not looking for anyone's sympathy or pity. I hope that we can all keep the conversation constructive.

1. Divide and Conquer - 4/5 (Slapper intro. Pretty good for a pilot episode, but it felt like they rushed into character drama a little too quickly. Like, I only JUST now met Robin and Cyborg for the first time, so this big breakup doesn't really hit as hard as I imagine it could had it been a later episode. The animation of this show is very fun and different from typical action cartoons, though. Stuff like the characters turning into chibis and going horrendeously off-model for gags is great stuff.)
2. Sisters - 3/5 (Immediately more character conflict and drama. I'd say this one works a little better, but again, I only really now just met Starfire, so there's not a hugely established friendship between her and the Titans enough yet. On the other hand, perhaps that's for this episode's benefit, as it's about her feeling replacable, which would not be very realistic after having been established as BFFs for several seasons. And I did think her and Robin's chat was really sweet, so whatever. Also, Blackfire is just a color swap of Starfire. Sunny Tennyson much?)
3. Final Exam - 4/5 (So this episode was the first to air, but is not the "real" pilot. Strangely enough, it would almost have worked better as a pilot, since it introduces the characters in their HQ immediately followed by showing how they work as a team. The H.I.V.E. aren't the most interesting villains but Gizmo was pretty amusing. What was with the lighting in the scene where they get out of the water though? Looked strange.)
4. Forces of Nature - 4/5 (Thunder's Sonic eyes is freaking me out. Please separate them... Anyway, decent episode, even if it's mostly just Thunder and Lightning wreaking havoc and getting moral lessons from Beast Boy.)
5. The Sum of His Parts - 5/5 (Fixit. Wow, clever name. Sarcasm aside, pretty great episode. It's interesting to see Cyborg's abilities explored, and the eerieniess of Fixit about to forcibly make him a full robot was highly engaging. Although while that IS the main story, the majority of this episode is spent with the other Titans fighting Mumbo Jumbo for some reason. Not that it's back, since I liked the zany wackiness of it. But it definitely didn't need take up that much time. Also, he briefly became a Canadian from South Park.)
6. Nevermore - 4/5 (Thunder and Lightning, Mumbo Jumbo, and now Doctor Light? So far this show has had really lame villains. Not that it's a huge detriment, because unlike other superhero cartoons, the focus in most episodes seem to be more on the inner workings of the Titans themselves as opposed to whatever villain they're facing, so I guess they just pick goofy ones to jumpstart the actual plots. Which in this episode was pretty amusing. Raven's a lot more mellow than her appearance would let on. I thought she would nearly murder Cyborg and Beast Boy for breaking into her room, but she was just slightly upset. Oh and, uh, what was up with intro being in Japanese?)
7. Switched - 4/5 (Just as I mentioned the villains being "lame" in the last episode, I thought Puppet King was pretty interesting. He's not like, compelling as a character or anything, but I found the puppet schtick fairly amusing to watch. As for the actual story, while "body swap" is not the most original idea for these kinds of shows, I still found it endearing how Raven and Starfire learned about one another. But the fact that they still keep their voices makes me go grrr.)
8. Deep Six - 3/5 (There's that Japanese intro again! Apparently it's used for episodes that are more comedic, while the English is for the "serious" ones. Guess I'll see if that assessment holds up under scrutiny. So this is mostly an underwater episode, which, while not a bad setting by default, feels pretty uninspired when it's nothing but blue backgrounds and rocks. Raven horning for Aqualad sure was a sight to behold, though. Felt a bit out of character.)
9. Masks - 4/5 (Wow, Red X was Robin? No way. It's not like they had the exact same voice or anything. Anyway, as good as this episode might be, it's really just some setup for Slade's schemes, which is really only vaguely hinted at whatever it is. As a result, I don't really have much to say. Starfire's lecture about Robin not trusting them was a bit "wha" though, because, yeah, if they knew Red X was Robin, they would've held back, and it would not be convincing.)
10. Mad Mod - 3/5 (Sheesh, this episode hurts my eyes. It's a funny one, though. And it has the Japanese intro, so I guess that fact about it was true. It's nothing but the Titans chasing some Brit for the entire episode. 20 minutes of pure zaniness. And Mad Mod was a pretty amusing gag villain. I also really liked the song "K2G" that played during that Scooby-Doo parody montage.)
11. Car Trouble - 3/5 (Gizmo drove away with Cyborg's car JUST as he arrived to confront the guys who initially stole it. He would have been right in the vicinity of it, how did he not notice it driving away? LOL. Also why do the two crooks calmly tiptoe around and vaguely say they "lost it" instead of just "some guy drove away with it right behind you like 10 seconds ago!".)
12/13. Apprentice - 5/5 (Slade merely wanting an apprentice is a bit of a confusing motivation. Like, for what purpose? Once he's fully molded Robin, what does he intend to do next? Take over the world? Not that it matters, since the conflict of Robin having to betray his friends to save their lives was thrilling enough. Although part 2 is obviously the better half, because the first is mostly just setup for that. Robin also makes a sick Batman reference, but can't directly mention him because of the Bat-embargo. LOL. Side note, the effect of the probes being the characters becoming...orange with a buncha circles wiggling around them was odd.)
14. How Long is Forever? - 5/5 (Robin just brooding in front of the speakers was funny. LOL. Anyway, the way time travel is handled here is confusing. I suppose it always is, but here it seems to function so that during the period Starfire was travelling 20 years, she simply did not exist during them. But she came back to the past in the end, meaning historically, she always returned. So instead of time travel looping around itself, I guess in this series when you travel, you're just gone. And if you return, the timeline you go back to will be a completely different one. That aside, it was neat to see the future Titans, although sheesh my guy Beast Boy aged horribly. And I find it hard to believe the entire city would become a dystopia like this, considering the Titans aren't the only heroes around.)
15. Every Dog Has His Day - 5/5 (Pretty solid for a zany comedy episode. Beast Boy becoming a dog to get bitches (pun intended) was funny. And the whole schtick of the Titans mistaking an actual green dog for him lent itself to a lot of good comedy. The reveal that that the dog is actually intelligent and can speak sort of "ruins" what made that aspect funny in the first place, but it doesn't affect the episode's quality or anything, so that's just a nitpick. Soto was pretty freaky though. Reminded me of Tiny from Ben 10.)
16. Terra - 4/5 (Yikes, Terra is scrawny. She's like a walking stick. I guess she has earth powers, although it's not really explored how or why. Though, at this point in the show, I've obviously learned that stuff is not something it prioritizes. Anyway, this episode is very good, but it's mostly just introduction to Terra and then a teaser that she is Slade's new apprentice victim. I'm interested for where that goes, but I don't have much else to say about this one specifically.)
17. Only Human - 4/5 (Not to go all Facts & Logic:tm:, but humans also have a limit to which they can use their muscles, so on a technical sense, Cyborg's conflict in this episode doesn't make much sense. Especially since he exceeds 100% by the end anyway, showing it was always possible. Not to diminish the story or anything, because I did find his conflict around it genuinely engaging. And the moment when he rises up to the challenge to actually beat Atlas is obviously very cathartic and rewarding. But also LOL that Atlas picked a beef with Cyborg over losing in a video game.)
18. Fear Itself - 4/5 (Here I spent the entire episode expecting the "obvious" reveal that everything scary that happened was a prank by the Titans to prove to Raven that she can be scared. Guess I was a little overconfident in that since it turns out she was just accidentally doing it herself.)
19. Date with Destiny - 4/5 (Hey, it's Spider-Man. I mean, Fang. That was a pretty freaky character design. Just a guy with a huge spider as his entire head. This episode felt like it ramped up the wacky animation to 11, particularly with nearly every motion Kitten makes. And that bit with Starfire's mouth falling into the punch stuck out, too. That aside, pretty cute episode. Starfire's jealousy is amusing.)
20. Transformation - 3/5 (Does the Titan Tower only have bathroom? That's ridiculous. It's huge! Anyway, not to complain about power inconsistency or whatever, but Starfire being able to instantly fly several hundred thousand kilometers away from Earth pretty much instantly, not to mention be able to breathe in space is a bit excessive. She's not Green Lantern... That aside, this was alright. It's neat to find out more about Tamaranians, but Starfire has already learned the "my friends will like me no matter what" lesson before.)
21. Titan Rising - 4/5 (Why is Raven so pissy at Terra? Like, I know she's moody and has a low temper, but raging at someone just trying their best? A bit out of character. That said, I still enjoyed the rivarly. I like Terra on the team. It's fun that they're expanding the roster.)
22. Winner Take All - 3/5 (Why does the Master of Games need people to lose a battle before he can absorb them and their powers? Why doesn't he just do it to all of them on the spot? I found it funny that Beast Boy lost the first round. When the episode began I was expecting some epic final battle between the three main characters. But nope, he just loses and is gone for the rest of the episode.)
23. Betrayal - 4/5 (That was a bit of a rushed betrayal. Terra is introduced in one episode, instantly leaves within the same one, makes a big comeback 4 episodes later, and betrays them in the very next while it's treated like some devastating loss to the team. Well, there is the game episode in between. But also she isn't even in that save for a silent cameo in one shot in the end, so that barely counts! That said I still liked the emotional beats of the story from Beast Boy's perspective and such, so I'm not hating on how this was done. I just think this could've meant more if she actually was a member of the Titans for the episodes leading up to this betrayal. On a lighter note, I liked Beast Boy's theatrical scenarios of how he should have asked her out.)
24. Fractured - 3/5 (So in-between the previous, serious, dramatic episode, and the upcoming 2-part finale which will obviously be about Terra, they felt they needed an episode about some annoying imp doing zany nonsense. Not that the show is a stranger to that stuff, but this wasn't nearly as charming as Mad Mod.)
25/26. Aftershock - 4/5 (Pretty standard "epic finale" fare, but obviously it's good because I liked this Terra arc, as rushed as it may have been. Her turning on Slade and even being the one who ends up killing him was pretty thrilling stuff. I didn't think they'd actually go that far, considering he's like the main villain of the series. But while that final battle between Beast Boy and Terra was pretty great due to the resonance and such it contains, I feel like the episode took up a lot of time having the Titans fight various miscellaneous characters leading up to it, that just wasn't as interesting. Side note, Raven and Terra just being colored completely brown to simulate being muddy stuck out to me. I don't know why. Mainly because most shows would draw wiggly lines to simulate the muddiness, not just one blank color.)
27. Deception - 4/5 (I know this show is episodic so stuff like this is bound to happen, but it is a bit eyerolling that characters seem to just learn the same lessons over and over. Like in this episode, Cyborg is beating himself up over being a cyborg, but by the end he accepts himself the way he is. A lesson he has learned in 2 episodes prior to this already. Not that I didn't think it was well done. His chat with Starfire was sweet, and the whole thing about him being undercover was entertaining too, so it's not much of an issue.)
28. X - 4/5 (So some guy steals Robin's Red X costume and takes up the mantle... But he also conveniently sounds exactly like Robin? Sure, because THAT makes sense. For the most part this episode is just baiting you into wanting to know who Red X is, but then NEVER answers it. Pretty rude. Nevertheless, it was still interesting. Also Professor Chang's design reminds me of Inspector 13 from Ben 10.)
29. Betrothed - 3/5 (Titans just casually flying to another planet like it's a mere road trip. OK. Is The Batman funding this or what? Also, that scene of Robin outside the spaceship made me LOL. Anyway it's interesting to see Tamaran thoroughly explored upon and such, but it's a bit absurd that every single person on the planet wears basically the exact same outfit.)
30. Crash - 4/5 (Cyborg's cybernetic features are confusing. Firstly, how could a digital virus affect his brain, which is clearly a biological component? Second, how and why are there red blood cells flowing in the "veins" of his mechanical parts? Nitpicking logic in a goofy joke episode aside, this was great stuff. I liked that they had to reluctantly get Gizmo to help, and Cyborg going nuts was just entertaining in its own right. I think the interior of his cybernetic parts were interestingly designed, and Beast Boy as an amoeba is just absurd but fun. Although it's inconsistent that he's able to talk while in that form, since he can't when he's any other animal.)
31. Haunted - 5/5 (This was pretty grim, but very thrilling. Given Slade was established as like the main villain of the show, even though it seemed obvious he was imaginary, I kept asking myself if he was actually real or not to come capacity, since I doubt the series would get rid of its main villain that easily. And well, they DID imply somebody else activated the hallucination chemical from the mask, so, like, yeah, he's clearly coming back. That said, if it was all in Robin's head, how did he get all those bruises and rips in his clothes? By punching the air? And why did Beast Boy have a cold in this episode? I guess they needed some comedic relief so it wouldn't be too grim for Cartoon Network.)
32. Spellbound - 4/5 ("Kardiak, you're under arrest". I get it. Because he is a heart. Pretty amusing. Anyway, yikes, Beast Boy sure was mean for NO reason. But the way they made up in the end with Raven even joining him and Cyborg's game of "stankball" was cute. As for Malchior, well, I thought he was a girl until he spoke.)
33. Revolution - 3/5 (Pretty much a rehash of the first Mad Mod episode. He has the Titans trapped in a maze of illusions and they chase him around and defeat him. Which I get is the whole gimmick since he's just a joke villain, so yeah. This was good, but not AS good. The pop-art backgrounds were pretty cool, and I liked how the British flag was the sky in the background the entire time. Plus, British Beast Boy was funny. The "message" about patriotism, democracy or whatever, felt a but muddled.)
34. Wavelength - 3/5 (I guess Brother Blood is growing to be Cyborg's arch nemesis or something. This was pretty average, so I barely got anything to say. Aqualad asks for help, so they take down Blood's underwater weapon and...Yeah. But I liked Bumblebee, and her fight scene with Cyborg had a lot of funny visuals. The bit where he shuts the door on her was amusing too.)
35. The Beast Within - 5/5 (This was great. You'd think it would be fairly predictable to tell a werewolf story with Beast Boy, but the execution really makes it work. Yeah, it's obvious he's acting strange because of the chemicals from the beginning. But his gradual shift from acting macho, to asshole, to picking a physical fight with Raven for NO reason was interesting because of how bizarrely out of character it is. Especially when his "beast" form took the Raven beef to the next level. But on top of that I especially enjoyed the twist that the Adonis guy from the beginning was a second werewolf, and the actual culprit. Robin seemed awfully quick to immediately lock Beast Boy away or straight up murder him though. For a guy who himself was blackmailed into being evil, you'd think he would be more considerate to other possibilities.)
36. Can I Keep Him? - 3/5 (This was alright. Pretty simple concept for a comedy episode is all. Beast Boy fosters a giant maggot and then it becomes bigger and dangerous. Kind of amusing how Starfire got more attached to it in like a day than Beast Boy did while hiding it for months. As a sode note, I liked the design of Rancids robot dog and dinosaur.)
37. Bunny Raven... or ...How to Make A Titananimal Disappear - 3/5 (Pretty good for a zany episode. The Titans as animals were amusing designs, and Beast Boy becoming a lamp instead was funny. Mumbo's song was catchy.)
38/39. Titans East - 4/5 (I like the concept of Titans East, although the only member I find particularly interesting is Bumblebee. I'm always fond of shrinking abilities for the potential practical uses that often go unacknowledged. She never really does anything with it besides shoot some lasers in the bad guys face, though. Speedy and Aqualad are kind of generic, and Más y Menos are just gag characters, so yeah. Cyborg's conflict here was pretty interesting, but the way he gets decapitated piece by piece was pretty brutal. But him sticking it to Brother Blood was pretty awesome, and I liked the sweet ending where he decides to stick with the Titans.)
40. Episode 257-494 - 3/5 (Steve Irwin gets mauled by a bear. Anyway, this episode is decent, but it's just an endless stream of references to other things, many of which I am not familiar with, so even as a comedy episode, a lot of the jokes don't work very well. That woman from the lame soap opera was still with Cyborg in the real world by the end because THAT makes sense. But it was funny.)
41. The Quest - 4/5 (Yeah, it was pretty obvious the old lady was the great master. Robin going through challenges was pretty entertaining though, but that snake one... He won by merely grabbing the snake? Sure, okay. The rest of the team dressing up as and pretending to be Robin was probably the best part, especially even Raven joining in.)
42. Birthmark - 4/5 (Welcome back, Slade. This was a very thrilling episode. Really just has you asking tons of questions. Like how is Slade back, why is he targeting Raven now, etc. But also, it was interesting how this potrays Robin and Raven as having a very close friendship. I mean I guess all the Titans are good friends, but these two haven't been explored as a duo at all, so it was interesting, if not a bit awkward.)
43. Cyborg the Barbarian - 4/5 (Silly concept, but I like it. Though given how time travel has been established in this show, Cyborg can't really do anything to affect the future, because everything he will do has already happened in the past. I like the design of the demon... Thingies)
44. Employee of the Month - 4/5 (I found it interesting how this acknowledges Beast Boy a physical task, as opposed to Raven or Starfire's breezy levitating. Beast Boy working at a meat shop itself was pretty funny, and the Tofu villain in the end sells the whole thing for me. LOL.)
45. Troq - 3/5 (The racism episode. The fact that we know what word "troq" is supposed to represent makes it very weird how often we see it used. I mean imagine an episode where they used the actual word this much... Yeah. I think this is pretty well done and what not in terms of being sweet and emotional, especially Cyborg's talk with Starfire and Robin instantly changing his mind on Val-Yor once he finds out. But the action plot they wrapped all this around didn't really have me hooked, and it's a pretty big chunk of the episode.)
46. The Prophecy - 3/5 (This is neat and all, but for the most part it really feels like nothing but setup for a grander plot than something to stand on its own. So while I'm sure the context of this will make the season finale more rewarding, this is just okay. I did get a kick out of Raven pulling up Slade as he was trying to leave just to jerk him around a little.)
47. Stranded - 4/5 (This is a fun episode, but it has one of the worst common TV tropes of all time; Character refusing to explain an easily explainable situation this creating conflict because of misunderstanding. I mean, yeah, Starfire DID describe what a "girlfriend" was, but then she just described what could also be platonic. Robin could have easily explained to her that there's a difference between platonic and romantic.)
48. Overdrive - 3/5 (I like the Billy Numerous theme music, but that's about it really.)
49. Mother Mae-Eye - 3/5 (Well, funny at times, I'll give it that. But ehhhh. Yeah, I don't know, there isn't much to be said here. Liked the scene where Robin spiked up his hair.)
50/51/52. The End - 5/5 (Yeah, pretty epic. The Titans using Raven's power was also cool. I was hoping to finally see Slade's face when his mask was knocked off, but I suppose a creepy half decomposed skeleton is also interesting... Don't really understand Trigon's motivation for, well, all of this though. He wants to take over the Earth and get rid of all life on it, just so he can sit in a giant chair and relax? I mean, the real story here is supposed to be about Raven, so I know it doesn't matter, but that's pretty thin for what's supposed to be the most threatening villain of the show to date.)
53/54. Homecoming - 3/5 (I love specific character focused episode where we see something more personal to them, but Beast Boy's background isn't that interesting and most of the team besides Elastigirl weren't very interesting. But I do find Negative Man's powers cool. Brain is a pretty cool villain too, I love his voice, really intimidating vibes. How are any of the Doom Patrol alive after what happened though? Never explained)
55. Trust - 4/5 (An entire Hot Spot episode? Interesting, since I always find it fun when shows divert from the main cast. Overall fun, but that ending was pretty frustrating though. Hot Spot was so obviously Madame Rouge!)
56. For Real - 3/5 (I do like the Titans East, but this was disappointing. I was hoping for more of a genuine episode in their own town, seeing their feats as a team and friends, as opposed to goofing off with Control Freak. Also one of the villains Brain had lined up two episodes ago is in jail here?? Were Más y Menos permanently translated to English for the audience to understand them? I mean I guess I prefer it, since having them two speaking what sounds like gibberish to the rest of the team makes it hard for them to appear as genuine friends, especially since they're mostly attached to each other as opposed to the whole team.)
57. Snowblind - 4/5 (Already loved Red Star and then he's immediately killed before my eyes!! Whyyyy! I was hoping he would gain control of his powers and aid the Titans. How has he still been getting tanks to fill up with radioactive liquid for so many decades though? And that's a pretty small room for two tanks a day over the span of decades.)
58. Kole - 3/5 (This entire season so far the Titans have just been around the world, given last time they were in what appears to be Russia, and now it's somewhere in Scandinavia. It's been an interesting change of pace, sure, but this episode wasn't terribly interesting. They meet some caveman with a little girl, Dr. Light is up to no good, etc.)
59. Hide and Seek - 3/5 (Bobby turning out to be real was a pretty fun "twist". Got dragged out for a while though.)
60. Lightspeed - 4/5 (Another non-Titan focused episode. Kid Flash is randomly horning on Jinx because why not, I guess? This Jinx redemption came out of absolutely nowhere, given how little we've seen of her prior. But Kid Flash is fun, so whatever.)
61. Revved Up - 3/5 (This episode is neat, but given how they are racing for the entirety of it, the constant action was pretty exhausting to sit through. Why did Raven sneezing and Starfire saying the Tamaranean equivalent of "bless you" inform all the villains they are Titans though? Also, infuriating we never got to see what's in the briefcase.)
62. Go! - 5/5 (Love seeing the origins of the team, though it's pretty oddly convenient that these 5 superpowered people (well 4 with powers) just so happened to stumble upon each other, same day, same time, same situation. I imagine shortly after this they occasionally stumbled upon each other trying to fight the same bad guy every so often and decided to start a team. Which would have been more realistic for their first interactions, not all 5 meeting at once. Pretty on the nose Batman reference but they still absolutely refuse to mention Batman.)
63/64. Calling All Titans!/Titans Together - 5/5 (Why is Beast Boy climbing up the mountain as a goat instead of just... Flying? This was quite the epic episode, I enjoyted the intensity of seeing nearly every hero be ambushed separately by different villains. It's a bit strange for the final part to mostly be from Beast Boy's perspective, and with the strange heroes he ends up meeting. I was expecting to see how the rest of the Titans made it to the Brotherhood of Evil base, but it's probably better this way, since it leaves it up to imagination, and it doesn't really matter. Seeing the brain finally defeated when all heroes went into battle was satisfying. Jericho's powers were pretty cool.)
65. Things Change - 4/5 (The amount of quiet and awkward scenes with that sad music was... Well, very strange. The whole Terra thing is a bit weird like, sure, if someone you don't know jumps up to you, acts as if they know you and tells you you've gotten amnesia, you'd think they were insane. But Beast Boy surely has photo proof? Or if not, he could get testimony from the rest of his team?? No??? It doesn't have to jog her memory back, but at the very least she'd realize the truth and know who she was instead of just being so vague and saying cryptic things. Some things she said implied perhaps she did know, because any real person would just yell out the weirdo stalking them, not give emotional speeches about the girl you once knew being gone etc. But all that aside, why did Slade send a robot out just to tell Beast Boy that he had nothing to do with what's happened to Terra? Also, that creatures ability to turn himself into any matter he touches is really cool.)
Movie: Trouble in Tokyo - 3/5 (This has pretty much one of the things I dislike most about movies based on TV shows; Instead of actually focusing on the iconic aspects of the series in question, it goes out of it's way to be as far removed from it as possible by setting it in a whole other country. Bummer, because an ideal Titans movie would really focus on the whole team, and THEIR city. Instead, they're just in Tokyo stopping a corrupt commander (who I knew was gonna be the bad guy from the get-go) who's creating crimes to be a hero. And the thing is with these kind of movies is, perhaps if they actually did focus on the characters relationships, it would be good. But instead they are mostly separated the entire time, just goofing off. And cue the obligatory relationship between Robin and Starfire. I mean, it was obviously going to happen, so it's not as if I mind it, but the drama feels pretty forced. They're heroes, yes, but they lounge around and take time off all the time when criminals aren't around. There really isn't much more to say about this. High-tier average. Although, admittedly, I was finding myself ready to close my eyes and fall asleep nearing the hour mark.)
-The Lost Episode - 3/5 (It's half the length of a normal episode, so it's hard to judge it, given it's not even serious at all. A fun little watch, for sure. Beast Boy walking around with a boombox on his shoulders was funny because of how dated it is.)
-New Teen Titans Shorts (Can't really rate them since they're just shorts, but here's a few throwaway thoughts: I like the artstyle. The lowercase T tower is a funny visual gag. Was Blackfire just killed? So, they finally actually showed Batman on screen (technically)? The hell was up with Cyborg's voice in one of these?)

hi! i have a traffic infraction FROM SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA (orange county) which i scheduled a court date for and the judge allowed me to do community service instead of paying for my fine. she very clearly stated "instead of the $226 fine, you can just pay $100 to sign up for community service and complete 4 hours of service" great! lets do that.
my due date for my fine is this monday, 06/03/2024 and i signed up two days ago 05/30/2024 for community service. judge said i need to register by 06/03/2024. i think i did everything right, however on my portal it says i owe $226.16 AND 4 hours of community service. i thought once i registered for the community service, the fine would go away. its now due in 2 days and unfortunately I CANT CONTACT ANYONE DURING THE WEEKEND so i have to wait till monday, 06/03, to talk to anyone about this!!!
i'm just trying to get advice/insight to put my mind at ease. is the registration just processing? will the fine go away once it fully goes through? has it gone through and i'll have to pay or face jail time? i'm scared to wait till monday to deal w this because its so last minute and im very anxious! im scared the girl that helped me like took my cash and i'm gna get screwed over. i want to put this behind me. help.

i would like to know if kentrell desean gaulden is still in jail or not, they said they set bail and that a commercial company would be paying it in total.. what commercial company. also og.three on instagram keeps posting using the hashtag freetop so I am curious to know if he is still imprisoned why is no one talking about it and where is he. the judge said he would still be in cache county prison but i dont see his name on the inmate list..

Hi all,
My LO wrongfully convicted was arrested and charged with sexual battery on a minor under 12 years of age, his little sister. He had just turned 18 two months after the crime was committed on the victim. The victim was 11 when she became pregnant by another relative.
The victim was coerced into saying it was my LO. They lived at 2 separate addresses and hadn’t even been around or seen each other around the timeline the investigator claims the victim became pregnant in the report.
The investigator who did the investigation lied in her report of probable cause to get my LO arrested. She said that he admitted to messing with the victim once, which was a lie. The DA knew that couldn’t be proven, so while he was in the county jail his charge had changed unbeknown to us to “attempted” sexual battery on a minor under 12?
The whole while in the county they interrogated him trying to get him to confess to the crime and take plea deals. For example, some of the deals were like 10 in 10 out on paper, 15 in 5 out on paper, life, 50 years, or 30 years, all at which he had to register for life. He kept turning down plea deals which in confidence of going to trial. The DA “claimed” to have evidence pointing the finger at him which was a positive DNA test of the fetus matching his and witnesses who would testify against him. That also isn’t true. They never had any evidence which explains why the charge had to be changed to stick.
His PD wasn’t any help. They took away one trying PD and gave him another bad PD who didn’t do anything to help him. The victim finally told the truth about what had happened to her and said that my LO didn’t do anything ever to her and even got a written statement, but the DA didn’t care to hear and refused to have the charges dropped. They knew he didn’t do it but still pushed to get a conviction based on an attempt that never happened.
They rushed his case. No motions were put in place on his behalf, no objection, no witnesses, and no evidence, not even an evaluation. The judge ordered him to take medication because he had become depressed behind this whole ordeal and was forced to take medication but was still cleared to go to court. We tried to get him to go into mental health court because he had behavior problems (ADHD), was quick tempered, and was on medication at the time of his arrest. He also attended special educations classes, so I don’t think he understood the severity of this crime at that time.
It was my LO first offence. They wouldn’t accept the youthful offender’s statue for him either, he tried that approach too. He ended up going in front of a biased judge during a plea trial who despised SO. She didn’t care for the truth, would hardly let anyone speak on his behalf. She told my LO she was going to make an example out of him and told him he was going to sign his plea of 23 years, and if he appealed, she would make sure he got life. So, he never filed an appeal scared of her words.
He was a young athletic man still in high school playing football, running track, and had his first child on the way when he got convicted. He comes home soon. He has already served almost 17 years, 35 months to go then 3 years on probation. He was wondering about how he would he be able to live with his wife and child?

I have been a fan for a long time of the show. Even as someone who works in a county jail. I always find it interesting to see how everyone reacts to be incarcerated. I was watching the newest season but fell back to season 8 since I haven’t seen it yet. Orion struck a nerve with me.
To refresh some peoples memories, there is a scene in the first episode where Orion is talking to his cellmate Jacob. They get into a discussion about race and racism. I have to give it to young kid, he was wiser than Orion who claims to be educated. Jacob spoke about how he doesn’t believe racism exists, or at least to a point like it used to. Orion is perpetuating the continual destructive narrative that black men are targeted by the police, and that his son was allegedly profiled by being followed by a police officer. It’s frustrating because he claims he wants to help mentor young men but is perpetuating a destructive to narrative to young black men that they are a target of a “racist system”. He doesn’t seem like a good mentor to me and it’s very frustrating to hear that being told to a younger man. African Americans have more opportunities than they have ever had in the history of the U.S., since the civil rights movements in the 1950s-1970s.
It seems to me Orion is stuck in a mindset that he has grown up with and closed off to accepting or even thinking about what this young man had to say. Just my opinion but I’m curious as to what everyone thinks. I’m sure there will be people that disagree with me but I’m curious to see if other people noticed to?
Btw I’m from the same generation as Jacob and was brought up not to judge people by the color of the skin but by the content of their character. This was taught in school but also by my family and my faith as a Catholic. While I’m not naive to say racism doesn’t exist in 2024, I don’t think it’s a prevalent as what the media and politicians try to say it is.

Is anyone familiar with the Newaygo County jail in Michigan? I'm just trying to figure out someone's bond and the numbers I call don't seem to work. Do they have a inmate lookup like access Kent? I don't know why this is being so difficult. Any help is greatly appreciated.

I'm a boring middle aged CPA. The most exciting thing to happen in my life within the last few weeks was when I made cinnamon rolls.
I'm very close with my 12 and 7 year old nephews. Their dad is a total loser fuck up. Yes I've contacted CPS and spoke to lawyers but not much cab be done. I actually hope he'll die of an overdose. I pay for my nephews clothes, activities, etc. They stay over my place on the weekends.
On Tuesday, my 12yo nephew told me that one of my brother's friend/roommate had been touching him since he was 9. I asked him how he was being touched and he said he would suck his dick and was on saying something now because this guy was now trying to fuck him and get him to suck his dick said if he didn't then he'd just go to my younger nephew to do it.
He wasn't lying. I said he will never touch you again. I went to my brother's house and beat the shit out of his roommate. I literally had to take a break. He thought that he'd just get his ass beat and move out but I wouldn't call the cops. I did call the cops and they arrested me for assault and went to LA County jail. I got bailed out this evening. Jail is fucking awful. It smells like puke and vomit and looks like a homeless shelter. I will never eat peanut butter ever again.
They did arrest my brother's roommate this morning. His face is pretty messed up and he got a concussion. I told my boss and coworkers that I was in the hospital for an allergic reaction. Hopefully I won't have to go back to jail.

I went online today to donate/volunteer and noticed Poll Watcher as an option.
Those that have done this, what is the normal responsibility/duty? What is the process like?
My State shows:
Look at voter roster Write down who voted Challenge voters Report problems (to County Auditor)
We are now a solid red State, so while maybe not as critical, I was still interested in helping.

Weekend Events
Manhattan Project B Reactor Tours The B Reactor National Historic Landmark, Richland Daily, 8:30a-12:30p Free
Petting Zoo/Hobby Farm Jostens Petting Zoo 10a $8
Mushroom Fest Adventures Underground, Richland 10-7p Fri-Sun
Auditions for Disney's Newsies The Broadway Musical ACT, Richland June 3 & 4 3-6p
Slamtastic IV - Indoor 3on3 Tournament Mid Columbia Hoops, Richland June 1 & 2 8a-5p
Friday May 31
Events
Opening Weekend Rise & Shine Bake Shop, Kennewick 9a-4p
CBC Dental Hygiene Club Fundraiser Red Robin 11a-8p
Huge Yard Sale First Lutheran Church, Kennewick 9a-3p
A Drag Queen Hoedown Out & About, Pasco 5-9p $15
Classes
Mini Van Gogh class Bristle Art Gallery, Kennewick 6p
Kaizen League Tri-Cities Triple Crown Classic Judges/Referee Clinic Pacific Kicks Tae Kwon Do, Kennewick 7:15p
Apollo Presents Water Follies Spring Splash Playground of Dreams 9a-10p
ImproveIntermediate Level Line Dance Lessons Branding Iron, Kennewick 6-9p
Fck it up with Lacey Lifted Lotus Yoga, Kennewick 6-7:15p $7
Crackle! Boom! Pop! Honeycomb Studio, Kennewick 2p $Unk
Yoga for TC Cancer Center Kaylor Ace Wellness, Richland 11:15a-12:15p $Donation
In Bloom Acrylic Class Yellow Dog Art Studio, Richland 6-8p
Community Healing Through Breath The Studio Bespoke, Richland 6:30-7:30p
Sporting
TC Thunder Twilight Meet #1 (Youth, Open, Masters) Southridge High School, Kennewick 5:30-10:30p
Jet Ski and Boat Rentals Howard Amon Park, Richland 5-6p
Games and Comedy
Solar Spirits Trivia and Taco Truck Solar Spirits Distillery & Tasting Room 6-8p
Karaoke with Pam Rose Tumbleweeds West, West Richland 7-10p
Art Krug Comedy w/ Drew McGrath Jokers Comedy Club, Richland 7:30-9p $12
Macrame Class: Wall Plant Hanger with Metal Hoop Anything Grows, Richland 6:30-8:30p
Music
Ben Naught Iconic Brewing
Fifth Friday Fete Barnard Griffin, Richland 6-8p
EMO Night Rays Golden Lion, Richland 8p
Blue Hour Open Mic Caterpillar Cafe, Richland 6-8p
Dr. ROCK & The Sturgeons At Michelle's, Richland 7-10p
Cindy McKay and Sally O’Neal Emerald of Siam, Richland 5-8p
Live Music with Jack Rothwell Rattlesnale Brewing Co, Richland 7-10p
Live Music with Frazer Wambeke Goose Ridge Winery 5-7p
Saturday Jun 1
Events
Artist Alley at the 23rd Classy Chassy Car Show & Shine Downtown Kennewick 10a-3p
Kids toys, clothes, & shoes release Wood & Neutrals, Kennewick 10a
Everyone's a little gay in June! DSH3 #156 Sam's Saloon, Kennewick 12p
Book signing- Kurtis Dolman Barnes & Noble, Kennewick 12p
Pride Kickoff Moonshot Brewing, Kennewick 12-9p
Cards, Cars & Collectible Show Kennewick Public Market 10a-5p
National Dino Day celebration Gesa Carosel of Dreams, Kennewick 5p
MCBA Field day 3619 W 4th Ave, Kennewick 10a
Food Truck Crawl Summers Hub, Kennewick 11a-8p
The Backyard Festival The Tin Hat, Kennewick 4p $20
Clothes by the bag & $ .75 Pants The Family Resource Center, Kennewick 10a-3p $8/bag
Hot Mess Cool Night Market Hot Mess Burgers & Fries, Kennewick 6-10p
20 Year Anniversary Celebration Hobby Town, Kennewick 11a
Abandoned Vehicle Auction Police Impounds and Private Impounds Rad Towing, Pasco 9a-12p
Cards, Cars & Collectible Show Kennewick Public Market 10a-5p
76th Annual Rose Show Columbia Basin College 1-4p Free
Pride Prom Columbia Basin College 7-11p
Huge Yard Sale First Lutheran Church, Kennewick 9a-3p
DSAMC Flower Planting Play Date Mac's Garden Center, Pasco 11a-1p
National Dino Day celebration Gesa Carousel of Dreams, Kennewick 5p Free
Terrarium Workshop Studio Paloma, Richland 3:30-4:30p
TCAB Recital 2024 John Dam Plaza, Richland 3p
1st Saturday Flight & Bites Lunch Monterosso’s, Richland 11a-1p $Var
Midsummer Festival + Summer Wine Club Release Longship Cellars at Horn Rapids, Richland 1-5p $64
Classes
Orchid Arrangement Workshop It's All In The Details, Kennewick 6-7:30p $75
Prancing Peacock Paint & Sip Art YOUR Way, Pasco 6-8p $42
Como la Flor Selena Paint & Sip The Medusa, Pasco 6-8p $42
STEAM Workshop: Pollinators! Columbia Park Trail, Richland 10a-12p
Hat Burning and Decorating Class Red Mountain Trails, Benton City 2:30-4:30p
Sporting
Level 7 - Mid-Columbia Tennis Junior Spring Championships 2024 Kamiakin High School 8a-4p
Big River Inagural Year Race Big River, Pasco 8a-11a
Outdoor Survival Training by Mid-Columbia 99s Columbia Basin College 9a $99
Summerfest Open Horse Show Franklin County Saddle Club, Pasco 8a-6p
NAMI Tri-Cities Walk Your Way Event 2024 Howard Amon Park, Richland 9a-12p
LAGERS & LUNGES on the lawn Iconic Brewing, Richland 1:30-4:30p
Games and Comedy
Trivia Night with Musical Bingo Aub's Lounge, Richland 5-7:30p
Karaoke Night Wine Social, Richland 8-11p
PRIDE Month Karaoke with Amber Bamber The Emerald of Siam, Richland 5-8p
PRIDE Month Karaoke The Emerald of Siam, Richland 9p-12a
Music
Stompin Ground Outside Longbranch Saloon, Finley 8p
Montez de Durango & Pattulla 81 Rancho De Las Vacas, Pasco 8p $Unk
Jägernauts Rattlesnake Mountain Brewing Co, Richland 7-10p
James Hunnicutt, Yotes Dog Bite Harris and Cory Peterson Ray's Golden Lion, Richland 8p
Frank n' Debi Jazz The Emerald of Siam, Richland 9p
Tresspasser Tumbleweeds West, West Richland 7-10p
Sunday Jun 2
Events
Tri-Cities Pride Festival Peanuts Park, Pasco 12-6p
Pride Night Drag The Emerald of Siam, Richland 7p $Unk
KA 10U Spaghetti Feed Village Bistro, Kennewick 4-6p $20
Father's Day Market/Bazaar Gesa Carousel of Dreams, Kennewick 12-4p
Storm Fest 2024 Ray's Golden Lion, Richland 6:30-11:30
Rest & Reset Day-Long Retreat The Yoga Community, Richland 9:30a-5p $150
Classes
Charcuterie workshop Muret-Gaston Wine Bar, Kennewick 3-4:30p
Beach Sign, Paint Party! D's Wicked Cider, Kennewick 5-7p $39
Food & Wine Pairing Dinner Monterosso's, Richland 5:30p
Sporting
SSSCC Event 6 Tri-City Raceway at RMEC, Benton City 7a-4p
Branded by M - Summerfest Open Horse Show Franklin County Saddle Club, Pasco 7p
Poses and Pours with Trinity Hot Yoga Goose Ridge Estates, Richland 10-11a $50
Games and Comedy
The Pub Prelims 1 The Pub, Kennewick 9p
Music
CBC Spring Choir Concert Columbia Basin College, Pasco 7p
Monday Jun 3
Events
Tri-Cities Pride Festival Peanuts Park, Pasco 12-6p
Transportation Improvement Plan Open House Cafe con Arte, Pasco 4-6p
Classes
Charcuterie workshop Muret-Gaston Wine Bar, Kennewick 3-4:30p
Games and Comedy
Game Night Live Round Table Pizza, Richland 5-7p
Music
Open Mic The Emerald of Siam, Richland 7-11p
Tuesday Jun 4
Events
Transportation Improvement Plan Open House Cafe con Arte, Pasco 4-6p
Future Eagle Day and Open House Heritage University TC, Kennewick 4-6p
Mobile Market (drive thru) 2nd Harvest Eastgate Elementary Kennewick 11a-1p
Silver City Brewery Tap Takeover The Underground Taphouse, Pasco 6-8p
Classes
Birds Of A Feather, Paint-N-Sip Shooters Sports Bar, Kennewick 6:30-8:30p $39
Stepping Stones Class Paws to Play Dog Daycare, Pasco 7:30p
Richland Rod And Gun Club Catfish Seminar Richland Public Library 7p
Sporting
Southridge Volleyball Camp for 6th-8th graders Southridge High School, Kennewick 4:30-7:30p
Music
CBC Orchestra Concert Columbia Basin College, Pasco 7p
Live Music with Siena Christie Wine Social, Richland 6:30-8:30p
Acoustic Night with Steve Carver The Emerald of Siam, Richland 6p
Wednesday Jun 5
Events
Transportation Improvement Plan Open House Cafe con Arte, Pasco 4-6p
Night Market Summer's Hub, Kennewick 5-8p
Life in Richland: Hanford Workers and Their Families Walking Tour The Uptown Theater, Richland 9-11a
Classes
Sips and Stems-Peony Party Richland Dugout, Richland 5:30-6:30p
Big Foot Beach Vacation- Art with Aubrey Crepe Haus + El Compadre, Kennewick 6:30-8:30p $Unk
Sporting
Pride Bowling Spare Time Lanes & Arcades, Kennewick 6-9p
Music
Jazz Jam's Hosted by Collin Wilson The Emerald of Siam, Richland 1p
White Bluffs' Howling Choir Club Performance White Bluffs Elementary, Richland 7p
events can be found on allevents.in and just a note, some events may have tickets required or payment at the door information I was unable to find

You ever met a rich crackhead bitch who’s parents bought her and her heroin addicted boyfriend a whole house, a new car, monthly allowance and seen it all come crashing down? This sounds like a fantasy, but it’s actually reality in the streets of Montgomery County, . This is the life of a rich crackhead named Amy.
Now I know a lot of you niggas don’t be wanting to read long ass shit, so imma warn you ahead of time, I’ll be putting a lot of effort in this post. So if you’re an illiterate ass nigga, u might as well leave now. Before I tell you about Amy, we gotta get the background first and go all the way back to 2021(if you want to skip and get right to Amy, just go to paragraph 11/12, but you’ll miss out on a lot). It’s the year 2021, I had just came back a couple months ago from pulling off EDD fraud. One day I was driving drop top mustangs in Malibu, the next I’m seeing my accounts get frozen and my money slowly begin to dwindle down. Before I knew it I was back in the dmv, broke and back to square one. Now from the time I was in Cali to the time I returned a lot of shit happened. I fell off with a lot of people, so I found myself hanging around an unusual crowd of people, the Bethesda kids.
You see before I dropped out of Towson University, I had met this nigga named LP, he was from Bowie and he went to school out Bethesda, but me and him got along because we had two things in common: we both liked DMV music, and we both liked to party our asses tf off. But that’s a story for another day.
You see LP put me on to a lot of people from Bathesda, I had never really hung around white folks before, and with the connections he gave me i made friends with a couple of crackas and even met my now deceased ex girlfriend. I was going to the craziest white functions and constantly turning up. But I saw more than a chance to have fun, saw this as a money making opportunity🤑 cha ching! And it was through LP that I met some friends who introduced me to a nigga named Swervy.
You see them white folks love to drink beer and smoke weed at parks, so one day I’m meeting up wit one of my good men, Ju. Ju is the typical school shooter typa fella, so it’s no surprise what I saw when I linked up with him at the spot. With him was this long haired European foreign exchange motherfucker whose name I forgot, and this bearded Eastern European nigga named Swervy, and he was wildin the fuck out. Mind you I’m from the projects, and all these bathesda niggas I’m meeting are rich ass motherfuckers who live in multi million dollar mansions. Keep in mind these cats may be rich, but everybody out bathesda is rich so these are basically the rejects. Pretty much the closest thing to a street nigga you can find out there.
As I’m getting introduced to some of these cats, Swervy pulls out a syringe. So I ask “Man wtf is this man doing,” “He’s shooting up fent” casually says Ju. That was the first time I ever witnessed someone shooting up a drug, and it wouldn’t be the last. Swervy would eventually become Amy’s boyfriend. And he was quite the yapper, he’s one of those motherfuckers who peaked in high school, and now he’s just watching his life come spiraling down, at least that is until he meets Amy…
In this meet up I learn a lot about Swervy. He was basically a kingpin at the age of 16-17. He would get shipments of 10’s of thousands of Xanax bars and sell them like hotdogs at a baseball game. These weren’t your regular junkies, these are the children of senators, buisness owners and lawyers. So you didn’t have to worry about a junkie saying he’ll pay you back, money was nothing to these crazy ass white folks. In the midst of all this yapping, I hear something that caught my attention.
“Yea so basically my cousins got like seven pounds of weed and 500gs of thc wax that they’ll give me if I can pick it up, it’s all the way in Arizona” Says Swervy.
🤑🤑🤑Cha mothafucking ching! This was the money I was talking about. Now driving cross country with pounds of weed and concentrate was risky, but shit I’d give my left nutsack for that kind of opportunity. And I might as well have, because a week later I was on my way to Tucson, with this Russian speaking drug addict I had just met the other day. Mind you I’m driving around in a red Lancer, with paper Vermont tags that I had printed online. I might as well Have went up to the police station and asked any of them if they wanted to buy drugs. My young naive dumbass didn’t realize the risk, all I was thinking about was 🤑🤑🤑 cha Ching!
I can sit here all day and tell you about that drive to Arizona, but imma keep it short and simple so we can get to this Amy chick. It was a fucking disaster, but we end up somehow making it back. We got the pounds and the concentrate, but it was all fucking shake! I’d be lucky to sell that shit for $100 a zip. Anyways, the trip opened my eyes to something, this nigga Swervy was a crashout crackhead dummy, and if I continue hanging out with him I was gonna end up dead or in jail. So I begin distancing myself, as I watched this man throw his life away from a far.
Now months go by, and at this point I’m like the street life ain’t for me and I’m working a job, I got a girlfriend and I’m staying low and just cooling it, with these pounds of weed that was so garbage, I was giving it away like charity donations. I had that goodwill pack! Just as things settle down that’s when Swervy comes back in contact with me. You see last time I had linked him, this man was overdosing off fent and we had to drive him to the hospital and save his life. But to my surprise, he was a changed man, or at least that’s what I thought...
He now has this girlfriend and he lives with her in germantown. You see me I’m baffled and curious, what crazy bitch would date this crazy motherfucker who’d probably sell his soul for one shot of heroin? I just had to find out. And when I met Amy I just didn’t know what to say. She was in her 30s and Swervy and me were in our early twenties. Amy was this slim, blonde hair, blue eyed Czechoslovakian chick who stood at about 5’7”. She wasn’t attractive by no means, you can tell the drugs did it’s toll on her, but if you’re drunk enough she can probably look fuckable. She had her degree in psychology from UMBC, but don’t be fooled her brain seemed like it was long fried. A conversation with her felt like a trip to the mental asylum. You will have better luck deciphering ancient Egyptian hyrogriphics before you can make sense of a word she says. Regardless I genuinely tried to get to know her. My guess was at some point in life she must’ve took a full sheet of acid and never recovered since. But she had her own two bedroom condo with a view of Sugarloaf mountain, a Pomeranian dog(which Swervy fucking hated), and a new jeep. So regardless I was impressed this crackhead motherfucker managed to bag her. So I asked him “Where did you find this shawty?” “At a hookah lounge in Rockville” he told me. That’s right folks, a fucking hookah lounge. Boi when I tell you after that, I was hitting up hookah spots like I had season tickets!
So I’m hanging out with them a lot now basically third wheeling, but Germantown was a long ass motherfucking drive, and I lived at the borderline to DC so I would even spend some nights in their guest bedroom. This Amy chick had parents that paid for her gas money and food, they had a fireplace and a balcony. And I can enjoy the comfort of all this as long as I occasionally bring some weed to smoke. And me I’m not one of those leeching ass bums, so the only time I’m hanging out with them is when I’m invited. And I got invited a lot, probably because Amy’s a bit cuukoo and Swervy had either robbed or scared off all his friends from Bathesda. He wanted someone to give him a break from her, a bro he can drink a beer with. So I would often times accompany them. One time we were at Buffalo Wild Wings, and as I sit across from both of them Amy begins playing footsies with me under the table. Of course I play it cool. I had no interest in her, mainly because Swervy hits raw and takes hepatitis medication, also having witnessed this man hold a bunch of homeless niggas at gunpoint in broad day light after I lost my phone at this gas station in Arizona. I can only imagine how he would react if he found out I smashed his girl.
A lot of the times I hung out with them, me and Swervy would talk about Amy. You see he’s not the type to hold back certain information, and as he’s telling me about his life and relationship that’s when it hit me. A nigga like me grew up all my life, with the world constantly kicking my ass and in a whole different realm of this life shit, you got these two rich kids who fucked up their life so much with so little consequences it became a culture shock to me. Me I caught a case and felt like my life was over, these two white people are disfunctional jobless drug addicts and they’re living the life I could only dream of having with years of hard work. I began to question the world, how many are there like this? Was my life a joke? I didn’t know where I was going hanging out with them, but if I couldn’t live the good life, I could at least witness it from the front row. I learned one thing about their relationship, Amy was basically getting old and low on options, and her parents supported her. Why? Because she’s not running around getting dicked down by a bunch of drug dealing black men anymore. Here they see this young white man, who’s also Eastern European who makes their highly mentally damaged daughter feel secure. And Swervy could win an Oscar, I mean what a fucking performance! One second he goes from Angus Cloud on Euphoria, the next a good suburban white kid the second he meets her parents. In fact he had convinced them that he was such a good man, even went to family gatherings and all, that they decided, let’s just buy them a full blown house.
That’s right, a FULL FUCKING HOUSE. I’m talking about a three story townhouse in Germantown, with a fully furnished basement, a patio, a balcony, a grill, 4 bedrooms, a 70 inch television, a paid off brand new fully insured jeep, they’re talking about trips to Italy. And that’s only the tip of the iceberg. Fool, are we living in a simulation? I couldn’t fucking believe my eyes, Swervy had pulled off the ultimate finesse. He convinced this rich family that he was the one for their daughter. And the most hilarious thing about it is that he was no better than a crackhead heroin junkie you can find panhandling for money on the street. I couldn’t even be envious, no instead I had felt something inside of me, this sort of toxic motivation. I learned that you didn’t have to work hard in this life, you didn’t have to earn your living, no instead one day God can just drop this lonely damaged woman who’s family is fucking loaded right on your fucking lap. He was even talking about marrying her and having her kids. In fact he tried, but see he had a problem. His sailors couldn’t fucking swim. Maybe it was all the crack, cocaine and heroine. He was having trouble producing fertile sperm, and Amy was running out of time! And that was the peak of their relationship. He was this close to closing the deal, but when it was game time he fell short. All it is now is one of those memories in your head that’ll have you like “damn, what if…” almost like when you reminisce on a football game thinking about how things could’ve been different if that one play went right.
Look I’ll be honest, I sugarcoated a lot of things. They may have lived in a world of handouts, but that relationship was more toxic than a nuclear wasteland. There’s a lot of fucked up details that I’m choosing to leave out, the psychical and mental abuse from both sides, the drug use. He was a psychopath and she was controlling and halfway demented. There’s a saying “opposites attract” and these two motherfuckers were far from it. They were two trains headed on a full on collision, so it was only a matter of time before disaster struck, and boy did it strike. Within a year I had witnessed a once fun relationship, become episodes of Shameless. At one point we fell off, I don’t remember exactly why, probably because I was tired of constantly being involved in their nasty games, and once again I distanced myself from Swervy.
The last I heard of Amy, she had kicked Swervy out the house and he caught her giving the sloppy toppy at a local park to 3 guys. Some hoodlum niggas, and a skater dude with a face tatt. The last time I seen Swervy he was arms dealing and one day pulled out an AR-15 on me and threatened to shoot me. I heard he’s now locked up currently awaiting trial because he broke into her home. I have a feeling one day I’ll see him on the news with a crazy headline.
Anyways if you’re a real mothafucka, you made it all the way here. If you read the whole thing I hope you enjoyed the story, if you have any questions ask away. If you didn’t feel like reading all that shit then fuck you bitch!
Edit: 😂apparently it’s a small world an a few of y’all know the people I’m talking about and updated me on swervys situation. He’s now out on bail awaiting trial.