i am repairing a relationship with one of my ex’s. we dated briefly and decided we both had too much going on in our lives and weren’t healed from past relationships so we broke up. it was messy at first, and we blocked each other on everything. but after a while we became amicable, now after being amicable for almost 8 months we are deciding to give things a try again.
i have trust issues from a previous relationship that i am heavily working on.
we have unblocked each other on everything except instagram and twitter.
a few weeks ago, we specifically agreed to be exclusive.
last monday we were talking about boundaries, my main issue was him still talking to girls he used to date/talk to/fwb/etc. i wanted to make it clear that that wasn’t okay. i slipped up and mentioned a girl that he follows on instagram. this got brought up bc we were talking about friends of the opposite gender, and the last time we dated he told me he had been friends with this girl since high school, but it was very apparent that she wanted him and went out of her way to be rude to me whenever she saw me. she now has a boyfriend and never texts him, talks to him, and unfollowed him on instagram. i mentioned this to prove my point that she was never his friend and was just waiting for her chance. if they were truly just friends she wouldn’t have went out of her way to unfollow him on instagram and she would still text him checking up on him, but she does neither of those things. and the only time she ever texted him before was to ask how our relationship was going. it was very clear she was only asking that to see if we were doing bad.
2 days ago i had a dream about him “cheating” on me, and i felt compelled to look at his instagram. and to my surprise, he put his page on private. i hadn’t looked since i last brought it up on monday. i confronted him and this started an argument. he said that 2 girls from his new job followed him and he followed them back, and he didn’t want me to see and start something. he was getting angry and just being outright rude about it. he asked me if every girl he follows on instagram gets stalked by me. he said he’s not sure if i trust him or this will work.
can anyone understand his point of view? i understand that looking through his followers is not healthy and wrong, and i took responsibility for that. however, i have never grilled him or policed him about instagram followers. i’ve never asked him to unfollow anyone. ive never mentioned anything about who he follows except for that one time i used that girl as an example. and my biggest thing is, if we are exclusive, then why the hell cant i look at his instagram? someone please give me advice. i am actively trying to better myself and move away from these unhealthy habits. i’ve expressed how sorry i am so many times. i understand he could’ve been worried about it. is it really that bad to even look at his instagram if he doesn’t want me to? and is it suspicious that he is going out of his way to make sure i can’t see his page? i also don’t understand why we couldn’t have a simple conversation about it, and why he got so angry and defensive.
TLDR; my man privated his instagram account so that way i couldn’t see anything about his page and i feel weird about it.

I have a pet cat who often spends time outside.
Stray cats in the neighborhood sometimes come to our yard and attack her.
I want our front and back yards to be safe places for her.
I want to buy a system that deters those other cats but ideally doesn't bother our cat.
(A simple motion-activated sprinkler system would not achieve my goal because it would prevent our cat from enjoying our yard, even while no other cats are around.)
I've seen amazing products with video camera AI image recognition.
Are there some that can detect whether an animal other than my pet is within view and then activate some deterrent (e.g. a sprinkler or ultrasonic speaker) and send a message to my Amazon Alexa / Echo and Slack?
I'd want the presence of humans (such as delivery people or me) in the view to pause the device.

Hello all, I’ve always wondered what a black person’s feelings would be while watching the scene in the movie True Romance that features a back and forth dialog between Christopher Walken and Dennis Hopper, specifically how Dennis Hopper’s character is viewed. If anyone reading this has seen that movie and would care to share your thoughts, then thank you!!! Have a great day!!!

I have a pet cat who often spends time outside.
Stray cats in the neighborhood sometimes come to our yard and attack her.
I want our front and back yards to be safe places for her.
I want to buy a system that deters those other cats but ideally doesn't bother our cat.
(A simple motion-activated sprinkler system would not achieve my goal because it would prevent our cat from enjoying our yard, even while no other cats are around.)
I've seen amazing products with video camera AI image recognition.
Are there some that can detect whether an animal other than my pet is within view and then activate some deterrent (e.g. a sprinkler or ultrasonic speaker) and send a message to my Amazon Alexa / Echo and Slack?
I'd want the presence of humans (such as delivery people or me) in the view to pause the device.

First post here, so sorry if this sucks. It's minor drama in an otherwise drama-free subreddit, but I felt it had enough to put here. I made one comment on this but wasn't heavily involved, so I hope that's fine.

The Context

arma is dedicated to discussing the Arma series, primarily Arma 3 and the sequel testbed Arma Reforger. Like many simulation games, Arma 3 has lots of DLCs (about 19 so far), but they're all fairly good and add a plethora of content to the vanilla game. Of the DLCs, a handful are viewed in very high regard. Apex (Pacific spec-ops), S.O.G. Prairie Fire (Vietnam War), Western Sahara (lore-friendly desert warfare), Contact (non-canon alien sci-fi), Tac-Ops ("meanwhile" mission pack occurring alongside the base game's campaign), Laws of War (Red Cross-backed humanitarian non-combat story campaign), and Global Mobilization ("Cold War gone hot" 1980s Germany) are generally considered the best for their content and popularity, and are viewed quite fondly. So fondly, in fact, that perhaps not liking them is a cardinal sin to others...

The Drama

This morning, a user posted their personal Arma 3 DLC tier list to the sub. Recall those DLCs I listed, because out of all of them, only Tac-Ops got to the top tier alongside Tanks and Helicopters (which both added a couple of their titular vehicles and improved gameplay mechanics for them, but not much else). Notably, Apex and S.O.G. Prairie Fire were in the middle tier, even though the community generally considers them the best DLCs. "Pretty good" might not be pretty bad, until you realize the only ones below it are Marksmen (added cool infantry weapons), Karts (a joke DLC that barely counts), and CSLA Iron Curtain (which was so bad the devs apologized and offered full refunds). So yeah, that's not a great position to be in.

• Some users wonder whether OP is "well" based on Apex and S.O.G.'s ranking. The sub quickly agrees that OP is stupid and that the post is probably bait, because "everyone likes SOG". OP responds, twice, and gets a total of 200 downvotes for their troubles (not entirely unwarranted; the reasoning was basically "Apex didn't have armored fighting vehicles, and S.O.G. did but not the one I wanted"). Their second response also prompts a user to hit OP with a callout block of text for judging entire game expansions based on the presence of specific armored fighting vehicles. Another user tries to defend OP and is told off because if you post on Reddit, you should expect criticism. Fair, I guess.
• A more tolerant user asks OP why they happened to rate the infantry-focused DLCs, particularly the well-received Marksman DLC, so low. OP states this is because they prefer vehicular combat over infantry combat, which strikes a nerve with another user, apparently based on the implication that Arma 3's tank simulation doesn't count as real tank simulation.
• One user asks about S.O.G.'s ranking, noting its high quality, and deduces OP must prefer vehicles more. OP's confirmation of this is downvoted heavily for no reason, prompting a user to bring up the stock response of the Reddit hivemind, sparking a brief argument about what upvoting and downvoting is even supposed to mean.
• A user repeats the belief that "prairie fire should be way higher". When OP sends a passive-aggressive reply advising them to make their own tier list, the user responds with the Neil deGrasse Tyson "we're dealing with a badass over here" rage comic meme, which was long thought to be extinct.
• One user tries to understand Global Mobilization's ranking, considering it has plenty of armored fighting vehicles. OP states this is because it didn't include vehicles they wanted, but also because "SPAAs dont work as they should". When the user asks what they mean by that, OP states it's because you can only aim them manually when the real ones used automatic radar-guided aiming... and, in the same line, notes this is a vanilla issue, meaning it's not the DLC's fault to begin with.
• A user suggests switching the rankings of Helicopters and Marksmen. When OP repeats that they aren't quite fond of infantry, another user tries to convince them by noting the Helicopters DLC added just three helicopters, while the Marksman DLC added a bunch of weapons and ghillie suits for infantry, which OP already said they didn't like. Upvotes suggest the sub thinks this is a pretty good response anyway.
• A developer of Spearhead 1944, a fairly new World War II DLC not included in the tier list, asks why it's not there. Mind you, it has plenty of vehicles, being WWII and all, so it's got a lot of what OP seems to like. OP's downvoted response: they don't really care for WWII.

And finally, the best for last:

• A user asks OP if this is satire. When OP states this is their actual personal opinion, the user proceeds to insist OP isn't a real human; upvotes suggest the sub agrees with this general sentiment. OP's response to this is removed by the mods, but after a brief back-and-forth, nothing is accomplished and the status of OP's existence as a conscious human being is left unresolved, though the topic has apparently been made a subjective matter.

OP has since deleted their account.

The Flairs

• "Does the sun shine on thine brain at all??😂😂"
• "There’s a comment section for a reason and it’s not to suck the OP off(most of the time LOL)"
• "If you're so spongy you can't handle someone having a disagreement with your opinion, and reflecting it by pressing a downward arrow, maybe the Internet isn't for you"
• "Nuh uh P E R S O N A L O P I N I O N"

TLDR:
I (28NB) and my partner (26NB) live together and we’re getting married next month. Been together on and off for a year, serious together for 6 months. They absolutely hate my friend (28M). i’ve been friends with him for almost 11 years, we dated for 4 years (the first 4 years i knew him), but this was back before i realized i’m gay, so there are obviously no feelings like that between us. I feel like i’m always playing referee. There are valid things in the past that my friend said that hurt them, but it was a long time ago and my friend is nice to them now. how would you handle this?
So my partner and my friend originally got along well when they first met. they’re both kind of jerks in a joking and fun way, which is probably why i like being around both of them. when i first met my partner, they were scared to officially be with me, and they did a lot of things that hurt me. they eventually cut all contact with me for 1.5 months, which hurt a lot. then they reached out, and after awhile, i forgave them and we got back together. they’re an amazing partner now and always apologize and feel bad about how they treated me in the past and trying to make up for it.
my friend was always there for me to vent to when i first met my partner and they were being hurtful to me, so he has a negative view of them based on that time. he was very unsupportive, saying things like “you two will never work, you know that right?” and “they’re just using you to have a fun summer before they go back home, they don’t actually want to be with you,” which neither were wrong at the time. now, my partner just moved across the country to be with me, and things are really good between us.
in the past, my friend has made some rude comments to my partner, although this was when we first met before we reconnected and became serious. he never apologized, but also my partner has said some rude things to him as well, but refuses to apologize or be nice unless they get an apology first. my partner takes everything so personally and is always being argumentative to my friend, even though he’s relatively pleasant with them now and has not said anything negative about them to them or me since before we became serious.
tomorrow my friend is coming over to spend the day with us, and i haven’t seen him in person for almost 6 months so i’m very excited, but my partner is not happy. he just called me and i had to forcefully tell my partner to “stop” and “drop it” (my friend said things about hating parks and my partner immediately got defensive and aggressive like he was insulting them). now i just tried to have a serious conversation with my partner about being nice or not saying anything if they can’t be, and they got upset (in a sad way) and stopped talking so i asked for space.
basically wondering how i should handle this, both in general and tomorrow? i hate being in the middle between them. i don’t expect them to be friends, i just want them to be civil for my sake. any advice appreciated.

https://the-avocado.org/authogroggydundee/ Article originally posted to The Avocado.org https://the-avocado.org/2018/05/08/steven-universe-why-lapis-lazuli-matters/
This week’s Steven Universe episodes put fans through the emotional wringer. The second episode, “A Single Pale Rose,” will undoubtedly draw the most attention with its game-changing revelations about the show’s mythology. But the first episode, “Can’t Go Back,” offers poignant tragedy in a slightly lower key. It highlights the ongoing struggles of Lapis Lazuli, one of the show’s most poignant (and, for this writer, relatable) characters, and why she is an integral part of the show’s dynamic.
It’s hard to say that One Thing won me over about Steven Universe, but it took awhile for the show to grow on me. The mid-season one arc “Mirror Gem”/”Ocean Gem” was definitely a game changer, where the quirky Adventure of the Week humor and action formula turned into something deeper, a story line with more gravity and stakes than your average children’s cartoon. No longer were the Crystal Gems merely stranded aliens fighting random monsters, they were alien outcasts waging a rearguard action in a long-ago war. And no longer would we, or Steven, automatically view Gems (even the Crystal Gems) as benevolent forces.
The principal catalyst for all this, of course, is Lapis Lazuli. And man, what an entrance she makes!
Mirror Gem
We first meet Lapis as a mirror, whom Pearl stores in her own gem and thoughtlessly gives to Steven as a way to learn about Gem history. Steven discovers that the mirror is sentient, able to reflect his own words and actions back to him in thoughts, jokes and conversations that leave Steven delighted and baffled. All goes well until Pearl, Garnet and Amethyst freak out at the mirror’s ability; Garnet tries to destroy the Mirror, branding it a “thing, a tool” causing the Mirror to scream. Steven sides with his new friend and releases the gem on the back, which turns into a person: Lapis Lazuli.
Initially, Lapis is elated to be freed, thanking Steven and embracing him as a friend. Until the Crystal Gems arrive, snapping her into a defensive posture. She summons a massive wave to smash Pearl, Garnet and Amethyst, complaining about their mistreatment of her: “Did you even wonder who I used to be?” She escapes, taking the ocean with her in a vain attempt to reach Homeworld. After a further confrontation, Steven manages to talk Lapis down, healing her gem and allowing her to fly back home.
Yet Lapis came back to Earth. And keeps coming back, with her personality deepened and her traumas increased each time. Between a detailed, ever-evolving characterization and Jennifer Paz’s consistently perfect voice over work, striking the right tone between moody teen and otherworldly being, she deserves more analysis than many fans grant her.
Rebecca
Lapis began in an early, unpublished Rebecca Sugar comic as Margo, a teenager whom Sugar describes as “an old self-insert character from high school.” From the bits and pieces Sugar’s released, Margo is a troubled young adult who barely survived high school with her sanity intact. She’s alienated, depressed and struggles to form relationships. Then a much-beloved cartoon character from her youth comes to life…and Margo leaps at the chance to escape into fantasy made flesh. Only things aren’t so easy as she hopes, leading to misunderstanding, manipulation and further despair.
It’s clear that both Lapis and Margo reflect Rebecca Sugar’s own struggles with depression, how she (like many people, mentally ill or otherwise) use entertainment as an escape and a way of connecting with emotions that are otherwise hard to express. The show reflects Sugar’s love for all manner of cartoons, from anime like Revolutionary Girl Utena and Sailor Moon to Looney Tunes and The Simpsons, while demonstrating how difficult translating their lessons into reality can be. There’s a poignancy to Lapis that many analyses (especially those who brand Lapis “selfish” and cowardly and flaky) seem to miss. More than anything, she is damaged and desperately lonely, a victim of unimaginable trauma struggling to form connections not based around abuse or selfish needs.
In her first two episodes, her conflict’s straightforward enough. Lapis trapped in a mirror offers a literal manifestation of inability to control her own life; not only that, it robs her of her humanity. (We later learn that she wound up on Earth, was poofed by a Crystal Gem, then interrogated for centuries by Homeworld gems who mistook her for an enemy.) Garnet explicitly brands her as a “tool” incapable of thoughts or feelings; this proves a recurring theme not only for Lapis herself, but the hierarchical Gem society in general, where Gems are made for specific functions and deemed “defective” if they deviate from the norm. And their first response to Lapis forming is to instantly fight her. No wonder Lapis immediately wants to leave.
Lapis Steven
Therefore, most of Lapis’s introduction defines her by loneliness. Steven offers her empathy, and she responds by revealing, if not friendliness, then at least a nicer side. She just wants to go home…but more than that, she wants someone to treat her as a person, not a thing. Her powers are meaningless if she can’t use them of her own free will; her personality is irrelevant when she’s just a “tool.” Steven meets both needs…simply interacting with her allows Lapis to open up and feel like herself; talking to her, rather than treating her as a monster, calms her down; healing her gem allows her to travel home. It would be a nice, poignant storyline if that were the end of it.
But reality is messy, and so is Steven Universe. Not long afterwards Lapis is forcibly returned to Earth, kidnapped by Peridot and Jasper and forced to inform on the Crystal Gems (though she tries hiding Steven’s existence from them). During “Jail Break” she’s imprisoned on Peridot’s ship; Steven promises to rescue her, but can’t, and she barely survives the crash. This leaves Lapis vulnerable to temptation from Jasper, who talks her into fusion to defeat the Crystal Gems. They form the monstrous Malachite, only for Lapis to immediately turn the tables on Jasper and drag their new form to the bottom of the ocean.
This storyline, in particular, provides Lapis much of her depth. Whereas other fusions (Garnet, Stevonnie, etc.) provide expressions of love and trust between two individuals, Malachite is a raging monster who’s unstable, violent and filled with hate. “Chille Tid” explicitly shows Lapis and Jasper wrestling for control over the fusion, a perpetual, mutually destructive fight that obliterates their separate identities into an embodiment of violence (“I’m not Lapis any more…We’re Malachite now!”). Our sympathies are likely with Lapis at this point, between the presentation of her actions as a sacrifice and her disheveled, battered appearance. This grows more complicated later on.
We're Malechite Now
The next time Sugar addresses this directly is “Alone at Sea,” when Lapis joins Steven and his dad Greg on a boating trip. Lapis tries to have fun but is constantly reminded about Jasper, and how awful their relationship was. And, worst of all, how much she misses it. Steven’s aghast, and viewers may be as well. But Lapis admits that she loved the power and strength Malachite gave her, after a lifetime of weakness and exploitation. And she admits to receiving pleasure from the ability to control Jasper, to wreak misplaced revenge on someone who, for all her evil actions, didn’t fully deserve it.
It seems that Lapis’s detractors (and there are a depressing number out there) use this as their springboard to their hating her. Which is understandable, since Lapis admits to what’s essentially domestic abuse (similar, in Agnew speak, to Lawrence of Arabia‘s confession that he enjoyed killing Gassim), but misguided. Jasper, not Lapis, initiated the relationship on the explicit promise that it would make them powerful, not from any affection or love. Lapis, after accepting, merely repays her in kind, offering a fusion of motives from the selfless (helping Steven and the Gems) to selfish (revenge).
Without excusing Lapis’s behavior, it’s unfair to judge it without this context or nuance. Maybe it’s because this is a cartoon (or, worse, a “kid’s show”), or maybe it’s because the leads are females where flaws are somehow less forgivable, but it’s clear that some fans can’t stand when the Gems aren’t perfect. Consider one of the leads: Pearl’s obsessive attachment to Rose and struggles to understand Earth and form her own identity provide a major part of her character development. Yet episodes exploring this lead to backlash from some fans who merely see Pearl’s jealousy and selfishness and not the multifaceted person they inhabit.
Alone at Sea
Thus with Lapis. Having admitted her unhealthy attitudes, she’s conveniently confronted with Jasper begging her to re-fuse with her. “I’ve changed! You’ve changed me!” Jasper promises, an abusive spouse appealing to Lapis’s vanity and insecurity. Lapis, to her credit, recognizes that Malachite was bad for both of them, and winds up driving Jasper away when she won’t heed Lapis’s warnings. This is a sharp moment of character development; it doesn’t excuse Lapis’s past actions, but it does show that she’s trying to change and be better. The takeaway shouldn’t be that she’s now perfect or recovered.
Because she isn’t. And her other major relationship, her friendship with Peridot, graphically illustrates this. Whether or not you “ship” Lapis and Peridot (I don’t particularly care), it’s clear that their friendship/romance/insert label here is pivotal to both characters and their understanding of Earth. For Peridot, a reformed villain embracing her role as a Crystal Gem, it’s an opportunity to make amends; for Lapis, it’s a reminder of her resentments and struggles to adapt.
After Lapis and Steven take a sight-seeing flight in “Same Old World,” Lapis seems energized with hope and the possibility of living on Earth. Until she returns to the Barn, and finds Peridot already living there. Throughout “Barn Mates,” Peridot attempts to win Lapis’s friendship, only for Lapis to rudely reject each overture. This seems harsh until you recall that Peridot captured and interrogated Lapis for months at a time, making her just another person who callously used Lapis. It takes more than a few nice gestures to convince Lapis that Peridot’s changed.
Lapidot
Lapis’s mindset here is harsh, but understandable. Peridot seems incapable of a heartfelt apology (“You were just full of such useful information. That’s a sincere compliment!”), expecting Lapis to instantly accept her transformation, and Steven’s insistence that she’s a better person means nothing to Lapis; nor do her gifts, which Lapis dismisses as “garbage.” Even so, she learns to tolerate her little green friend and tries empathizing with her; by the next episode, “Hit the Diamond,” she joins the Crystal Gems in an impromptu baseball game with a gang of Rubies to save Peridot.
Peridot and Lapis’s relationship proves healthier than Jasper’s, and helps Lapis acclimate to Earth. She and Peridot watch an awful soap opera called Camp Pining Hearts, create bizarre art called “Meep Morps,” and enjoy each other’s company. Despite this much-needed connection, it’s clear that Peridot’s kindness hasn’t solved everything. Lapis lapses from hostility to flippant indifference, still struggling to connect or let her emotions show. And Peridot, we learn, enables her by refusing to discuss troubling matters, from Jasper’s presence to, in Season Five, a possible Diamond invasion.
Another key episode is “Room for Ruby,” where Navy, a Ruby survivor from “Hit the Diamond” and subsequent episodes, seems to defect to Earth and asks Peridot and Lapis for help. Lapis is constantly frustrated by Navy’s cheerfulness and immediate love for Earth. While she distrusts Navy’s motives, she also immediately blames herself, assuming that there’s something wrong with her for not instantly adjusting.
Lapis Come On2
The episode ends with Navy revealing that the whole episode was an elaborate con to recapture her ship and humiliate the Crystal Gems. Where Steven and Peridot are furious, Lapis is overjoyed. “I was right!” she proclaims as they watch Navy sail into the cosmos, laughing hysterically. In one sense, she was right to mistrust Navy; in another, it’s a validation that there’s nothing wrong with her inability to handle trauma. Comparing yourself to the happiness to others is another inevitable part of depression; if everyone else is happy and satisfied, why not me? Because you’re not other people.
Even when Lapis seems better-adjusted, there’s an inescapable undertow of depression. No longer traumatized, she’s simply detached and lazy, watching TV all day rather than doing anything productive. Between her hair becoming gradually more unruly and Jennifer Paz trading her wounded angel voice for teenage snark, it’s not especially subtle. Even in “Gem Harvest,” when she and Peridot manage to cultivate some crops, she lapses into defeat when the corn and pumpkins don’t magically come to life…or when Pumpkin leaps into Steven’s arms (“It’s just come into existence and it already doesn’t like us”). Why bother?
Pumpkin 2
Which doesn’t make Lapis’s departure from Earth in “Raising the Barn,” her exile to the Moon and subsequent escape in “Can’t Go Back,” any less traumatic. She fully expects Peridot to leave Earth with her, and feels betrayed when she won’t. Yet she can’t bring herself to abandon her friends entirely, keeping watch over Peridot and the Gems and wishing that she had the strength and courage to join them. This leads to a hauntingly poignant song where she expresses her disconnect, her wish that she could be a good person but fear that she can’t. At episode’s end she ignores Steven’s entreaties and flies further into space, proving her fears are both self-confirming and inescapable.
The tragedy of Lapis Lazuli stems from her inability to move on. She suffers from trauma and depression, possibly post-traumatic stress disorder from a life of mistreatment. It’s easy to read her as a frustrating, even negative character, but I feel that’s missing the point. She is difficult; she is hard to understand; sometimes, she’s hard to even like. But it’s all of a piece with her characterization, which seeks for a nuanced understanding of what it’s like to live with mental illness.
We don’t know what Lapis was like before being trapped in the mirror. Maybe she was happy and content with her lot as a terraformer; maybe she had the same issues, in less extreme form. We never see another Lapis Lazuli to confirm or deny any suspicions (it does seem like Gems have default personalities, however much they try to transcend them). We only see the shattered remains of a life gone wrong. And someone who has to pick up the pieces with a minimum of help.
That Distant Shore
It’s clear that Lapis responds to empathy and understanding. Hence her instant bond with Steven, the one constant throughout her appearances on the show. Hence her growing more attached to Peridot the less the latter tries to impress Lapis and starts treating her as a friend. But she also can’t stand deceit, which explains her falling out with Peridot. And her social awkwardness seems driven less by fear of others than self-loathing; a fear that she can’t connect, that she is different, and that others can’t understand her and she can’t understand them. And that’s it best not to try.
As heartbreaking is it watching Lapis fly into space, it’s understandable. She feels that she’s let everyone down, least of herself. Her mindset doesn’t allow her to accept that her friends love her for who she is; she’s convinced they only see her failures and bad actions. She can’t conceptualize that she’s a person of worth, that she matters to others and that she deserves to be loved. Which is a blinder which she can’t remove, no matter how hard she tries, no matter how many friends she makes.
So many shows, movies and novels struggle to offer sympathetic treatments of mental disorders, from the severe to the commonplace. I still cringe when I see ads for The Good Doctor, which evidently treats autism as a superpower, or the reductive, often-insulting treatments of illnesses ranging from depression to schizophrenia in other works. So often, mental illness still serves as the butt of jokes and dismissiveness from people who should know better.
Lapis Same
Characters like Lapis Lazuli are important. Aside from BoJack Horseman, an animated series with a similarly nuanced take on depression, I can’t even think of a cartoon character I’ve empathized with as readily as Lapis. Sure, I love Pearl and the other Gems as much as anyone; Mabel Pines from Gravity Falls represents everything good and joyful in the world; Hank Hill and the King of the Hill cast are recognizable and funny. But I never felt that I was Mabel Pines or Hank Hill; sometimes I do feel a lot like Lapis Lazuli, even if I’m a cishet white guy and not a queer-coded blue space rock.
People like myself struggling with mental illness share Lapis’s dream that someday we can find happiness on that distant shore. We make mistakes, we hurt and alienate people we love, and we struggle with issues ranging from basic interactions to broader emotions and life-altering decisions. We don’t ask to be excused for our mistakes, just for patience and understanding. Nobody deserves to be alone. Not you, not me, not Lapis Lazuli.

So a while back when someone was hyping up the RP-StewV2 model on the boards, they had a special format for hiding the character's internal thoughts from the user, allowing the character to have thoughts that remained hidden but still voiced so that the character would be able to act on them more naturally.
This was an interesting concept to me but the model seemed to fail a lot at the format which was basically [] and then (#' followed by the internal thoughts and then another ' and an ending ) mark (trying to avoid having the whole thing disappear from view when viewed on Reddit). It would either make the ending parenthesis an ending bracket instead, would put way too many hash marks in there, or would otherwise muck up the format just enough that it was a headache and not at all conducive to good roleplay.
Then I found this character on characterhub: https://www.characterhub.org/characters/illuminaryidiot/zoey-51eca686 This character had a similar thing going but instead of simply being the internal thoughts, it summarized my last quote or action, figured out what the character thought about it and then formulated its own course of action from there, and hid the entire thing from view with div tags in HTML. What's more, It did this 100% reliably and without me ever seeing what was being put there, unlike the other format which stayed visible until the proper format was complete and then it would vanish from view.
The only disadvantage to this is that sometimes I'd be staring at a blank message as the AI was filling up the chain of thought in the first part of the post. but that only ever amounted to maybe 10-15 seconds of additional wait time.
I looked at the character to see how they managed such a feat and there was really only two spaces in the card that mentioned this. One in the character note on the card, and one in the body of the card itself under the first message.
I'm still not 100% sure of how much this adds to the character since this is the only card I've ever seen that uses it, but the fact that I've never seen it fail so far makes it at least less annoying than the other format, which seems to need to be all on one line.
Similarly to that, there was this 'creamsan' bot that was supposed to make use of some extra scripts to take down information you fed the AI about yourself and then supposedly it would compile this info into a lorebook automatically. Unfortunately I never could get this to work right even though I did everything the instructions said and it appeared to work according to the test instructions. Every time I went to look at the lorebook it would still say it was empty. BUT if that had worked, imagine how neat it would be for your AI to be able to take down info about you so that you could continue chatting multiple times down the road without having to to explain your likes and dislikes and hobbies every time it asked.
Have you seen any other cards with interesting gimmicks or tricks? Is it something you can easily copy to other characters or is it too involved to work like that?

I would love some advice on how to go about this situation at work: I was brought in for an interim membership position while someone was on maternity leave. In my eyes we immediately got off on the wrong foot because she was not communicative, did not follow through on the things she said she would do to help me during my training, and viewed my messages + ghosted me on her last day of work when I still had final questions for her. I picked up on the job quickly, saw an inbox with a handful of email chains of people following up over a multiple-month period bc she had never responded, and saw all of the processes she was not keeping up with in our CRM program. I did a good job in her absence and when she came back, the executive director wanted me to stay in a new position of supporting both her and another director of a different department. We laid out a very detailed divide of responsibilities in which I'm not answering any emails/inquiries, and I'm mostly supporting this other department on a daily basis. However, the control freak in me is stressing out because she's just not doing a good job - answering emails days after receiving them (it's super manageable and should be responded to within 24 hours IMO), not sending onboarding emails to members who have renewed (she's a month behind on this now), not creating/sending the monthly newsletter she's in charge of, not scheduling she committee meetings she's been asked to, etc. And I feel like such an asshole when we get on team calls and she's there with her 5 month old baby, and I don't have kids so I can't imagine what that's like, but she's literally barely doing her job, and I know that for a fact because I can see in BOX that she's not updating documents and we have a shared email account so I can see she's not responding promptly. I feel upset because on a weekly basis I ask if I can help with specific things, she says no she'll do it, and then she doesn't do it. I feel like I can't tell her "Hey, I really think you should be doing XYX" because I'm not her boss and she's been at the company longer than me.
I guess I have multiple questions: Should I just care less? Is it the right thing to do to try to bring this up to her directly? (I have little experience with confrontation so this option scares me) Do I tell my boss I'm struggling seeing this happen? I don't want to be a narc but it's pissing me off that she's getting paid and really not doing much work.

Rep ranges from 4-12 depending on the day and the exercise I consider myself an intermediate to advanced gym goer from the lifts I can do. Note that my workout is high-intensity (feeling sore for a some time) since I have to study almost all day long and don't have enough time. I'm also happy with the results and think this is the best split I thought about
I do a chest, back, legs and arms split (ABCD) Where:
A (Chest) consists of: -Flat barbell bench press 4 sets -Incline barbell bench press 4 sets -Cable crosses 4 sets -Machine flies 2 sets I also incorporate some sets of lateral raises in the end of my chest workout
B (Back) consists of: -Lat pulldowns 4 sets -Seated rows 4 sets -Neutral grip pulldowns 4 sets -Raw T-bar row 4 sets
C (Legs) consists of:
-Squats 4-5 sets -Hack squat 3 sets -Machine leg curl/stiff 4 sets -Leg extensions 3-4 sets -Calf raises 4 sets
D (arms) consists of:
-Barbell military press 3-4 sets (used to do seated dumbell presses, but those are feeling better) -Lateral raises 4 sets -Machine reverse flies 3 sets
-Barbell curl 2-3 sets -Hammer curls 3 sets -Scott machine curls 3 sets
-Tricep extension 3 sets -Rope triceps extension/dips 3 sets -EZ bar skull crushers 4 sets

Rep ranges from 4-12 depending on the day and the exercise I consider myself an intermediate to advanced gym goer from the lifts I can do. Note that my workout is high-intensity (feeling sore for a some time) since I have to study almost all day long and don't have enough time. I'm also happy with the results and think this is the best split I thought about
I do a chest, back, legs and arms split (ABCD) Where:
A (Chest) consists of: -Flat barbell bench press 4 sets -Incline barbell bench press 4 sets -Cable crosses 4 sets -Machine flies 2 sets I also incorporate some sets of lateral raises in the end of my chest workout
B (Back) consists of: -Lat pulldowns 4 sets -Seated rows 4 sets -Neutral grip pulldowns 4 sets -Raw T-bar row 4 sets
C (Legs) consists of:
-Squats 4-5 sets -Hack squat 3 sets -Machine leg curl/stiff 4 sets -Leg extensions 3-4 sets -Calf raises 4 sets
D (arms) consists of:
-Barbell military press 3-4 sets (used to do seated dumbell presses, but those are feeling better) -Lateral raises 4 sets -Machine reverse flies 3 sets
-Barbell curl 2-3 sets -Hammer curls 3 sets -Scott machine curls 3 sets
-Tricep extension 3 sets -Rope triceps extension/dips 3 sets -EZ bar skull crushers 4 sets

My list is based on my opinion of the most influential collections of music so albums and classical pieces are included. But most importantly this is a list of good music. I wanted to make this after seeing Apple's Top 100 Albums list. And yes there are only 50 but I can do the rest if anyone cares.
Top 50 Albums

1. Symphony No. 9 - Beethoven
   
2. Stg. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band
   
3. Pet Sounds - The Beach Boys
   
4. King Of Blue - Miles Davis
   
5. Paranoid - Black Sabbath
   

6-50: (not in order)
A Love Supreme - John Coltrane
Matteus-Passio - J.S. Bach
In the Court Of The Crimson King - King Crimson
Thriller - Michael Jackon
Berry Is On Top - Chuck Berry
Time Out - Dave Brubeck Quartet
King of The Delta Blues Singers - Robert Johnson
Symphony No. 5 - Beethoven
Revolver - The Beatles
The Velvet Underground & Nico - The Velvet Underground & Nico
To Pimp A Butterfly - Kendrik Lamar
Madvillany - MF DOOM
Requiem - Mozart
Swain Lake -Tchaikovsky
Enter The Wu-Tang - Wu-Tang Clan
Led Zeppelin II - Led Zeppelin
Nevermind - Nirvana
The Dark Side of The Moon - Pink Floyd
Songs in the Key of Life - Stevie Wonder
Back to Black - Amy Winehouse
OK Computer - Radiohead
Tristan and Isolde - Richard Wagner
Highway 61 Revisited - Bob Dylan
What’s Going On - Marvin Gaye
Are You Experienced - Jimi Hendrix
Symphony No. 9 - Anthony Dvorak
The Chronic - Dr. Dre
Discovery - Daft Punk
The Rite of Spring - Igor Stravinsky
The Low End Theory - A Tribe Called Quest
The Marshall Mathers LP - Eminem
I Put a Spell On You - Nina Simone
Aretha Now - Aretha Franklin
Showcase - Patsy Cline
loveless - my bloody valentine
Elvis (Fool) - Elvis
The Nutcracker - Tchaikovsky
Purple Rain - Prince
Off the Wall - Michael Jackson
Like a Prayer - Madonna
A Night At The Opera - Queen
The Good, The Bad and the Ugly - Ennio Morricone
The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars - David Bowie
Straight Outta Compton - N.W.A
Master of Puppets - Metallica
Exodus - Bob Marley & Wailers

22 (f), 5’1”, 206 lb, IUD (needs to be out by September) and married. Only on vitamins and biotin. Vape and marijuana.
Currently diagnosed with
BPD, depression and anxiety - but I am stable now other than the rare sad day. I have an incredibly destructive past with this.
Acid reflux - since about 12
Chronic pelvic pain, possible endometriosis, PCOS
About 5 months ago I ended up in the hospital after projectile vomiting all morning and puking up some blood. It might be important that I had drank a decent bit of alcohol the night before. They gave me meds to calm my nausea once I was there and took blood. I was told to change my diet to less acidic/spicy foods and I had been eating quite terribly as I’ve never been an overweight person until the last year. I was then put on a waitlist for a scope and completely changed my eating and drinking habits, losing 30 lb in the process.
After that I started experiencing intense nausea daily and for a while(months) after, I was vomiting multiple times weekly. The nausea has calmed down a bit but sometimes it is still unbearable. I have taken multiple pregnancy tests since the beginning of this, and all have been negative. I’ve had a hard time sleeping because of this, sometimes only getting a few hours. I have also noticed even my gag reflex is incredibly sensitive now, and I find it difficult to brush my teeth without vomiting, if that could be related.
I decided to go back to the doctor a few weeks ago to try and expedite the date of my scope, but she had decided because my nausea calmed down, that I should be fine to wait the normal time. She sent a referral for an urgent ultrasound. We parted ways and I booked in to get my iud removed with her coming up on June 12th and to go over my ultrasound.
I signed up online to view my results and waited a few days for it to come up. It says the timing is critical on my ultrasound and that almost everything is obstructed by gas. It also indicates I have fatty liver disease. I also noticed in my bloodwork from five months ago, it says I have an infection. I haven’t heard from the doctor about my results but have been waiting until the 12th.
This week suddenly I’ve been having on and off pain in my lower belly/pelvic area. I’ve also been constipated and not passing gas as much. I woke up this morning to it being very intense and especially tense whenever my bladder fills up. I’ve tried to give the doctor a call but I’m unable to get ahold of them.
Should I be concerned? I’ve felt awful for months and now this pain is pretty bad and has been here for about 6 days. I thought it may be appendicitis but it doesn’t seem like it is. I’m growing very concerned after seeing my ultrasound results and with this new pain but the doctor I’ve seen doesn’t seem concerned neither does the doctor who will perform my scope. I have tried to contact the doctor I’ve been seeing about this (I do not have an actual family doctor), but I’ve gotten no answers.

Hey chat I need ur help!! I’m pretty much in this game for almost 2 years TikTok 700k+ / Ig 50k+/ Yt 120k+/ Snapchat 180k+ and every single social media is doing great, except for IG. I post original lifestyle/entertainment content, I grew to 50k+ followers on lG back when we had “Do not post to feed option”, I had multiple reels get 10M+ views, but for some reason without that option my reach is super low. With 50k followers u’ll expect better story views, but I get 600 top, reels end getting reach at 3k in 24h and only 10% MAX of my followers see my posts. I never bought followers nor I violated any guidelines… Account status is good, but I can’t reach my followers at all.. I get more of non followers interaction 🤣 Thanks in advance

My list is based of my opinion of the most influential collections of music so albums and classical pieces are included. But most importantly this is a list of good music. I wanted to make this after seeing Apple's top 100 Albums list.
Top 50 Albums

1. Symphony No. 9 - Beethoven
   
2. Stg. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band
   
3. Pet Sounds - The Beach Boys
   
4. King Of Blue - Miles Davis
   
5. Paranoid - Black Sabbath
   

6-50: (not in order)
A Love Supreme - John Coltrane
Matteus-Passio - J.S. Bach
In the Court Of The Crimson King - King Crimson
Thriller - Michael Jackon
Berry Is On Top - Chuck Berry
Time Out - Dave Brubeck Quartet
King of The Delta Blues Singers - Robert Johnson
Symphony No. 5 - Beethoven
Revolver - The Beatles
The Velvet Underground & Nico - The Velvet Underground & Nico
To Pimp A Butterfly - Kendrik Lamar
Madvillany - MF DOOM
Requiem - Mozart
Swain Lake -Tchaikovsky
Enter The Wu-Tang - Wu-Tang Clan
Led Zeppelin II - Led Zeppelin
Nevermind - Nirvana
The Dark Side of The Moon - Pink Floyd
Songs in the Key of Life - Stevie Wonder
Back to Black - Amy Winehouse
OK Computer - Radiohead
Tristan and Isolde - Richard Wagner
Highway 61 Revisited - Bob Dylan
What’s Going On - Marvin Gaye
Are You Experienced - Jimi Hendrix
Symphony No. 9 - Anthony Dvorak
The Chronic - Dr. Dre
Discovery - Daft Punk
The Rite of Spring - Igor Stravinsky
The Low End Theory - A Tribe Called Quest
The Marshall Mathers LP - Eminem
I Put a Spell On You - Nina Simone
Aretha Now - Aretha Franklin
Showcase - Patsy Cline
loveless - my bloody valentine
Elvis (Fool) - Elvis
The Nutcracker - Tchaikovsky
Purple Rain - Prince
Off the Wall - Michael Jackson
Like a Prayer - Madonna
A Night At The Opera - Queen
The Good, The Bad and the Ugly - Ennio Morricone
The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars - David Bowie
Straight Outta Compton - N.W.A
Master of Puppets - Metallica
Exodus - Bob Marley & Wailers