How to write cool fonts on paper

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Karghol stepped forward. As Rob he might be scared, but he'd been the leader of the group for a long time, operating as our main tank across a ton of games, and now, I could see him taking that step again, "Okay, first thing's first. If they're gonna pop us out of this from the outside, then that's not on us, but we've all seen this anime. If they're not coming, then we need to get to the endgame as fast as possible."
"Nope," I shook my head, surprising even myself at how quickly I'd said something.
He turned, "What? I mean, we gotta get out ahead of this."
"In most games, I'd agree, but not here, not in this game. Also, side-point but decision time for everyone: Real names or character names? I can't keep flipping between them. Lugh is what's on my party registry, so I'm sticking with Lugh," It seemed small but wasn't.
I'd learned well enough that giving people all of the information was most often counter-productive at best. Giving people a small, immediate choice was far preferable and got them on the path to understanding better. Temur snorted slightly at the absurdity, "Well, I suppose you can call me either Temur, or Temur. Whichever floats your boat."
Several groans came out, and finally, some laughter. I mean, it was dad joke humor to be sure, but jokes were probably going to become a much more specific thing for us. From there, everyone chose their character names, either because it was simply easier given the nametags in our party rotation, or because they just didn't want everyone knowing their real ones. Khargol however, was a slight agitated, "Alright, so why not speedrun it?"
"Because speedrunners die and reset constantly."
The slight mirth died out in the room, but Khargol wasn't ready to yield the point, "I've watched you do a no-death run of Dark Souls!"
I nodded, "And do you have any idea how many times I died in that game getting to that level of skill? Look, this isn't Dark Souls. That game has set difficulty levels. Yeah, it's got solid AI, but here? The AI adapts to tactics, and I'm pretty sure the beta test players are about to learn that the hard way."
Everyone was a bit curious at the statement, but it was Shelara who spoke up, "What does that 'adaptive AI' mean?"
I sighed, and took a seat at the head of the table, with Khargol finally sitting down next to me, "It means the AI of the system is learning. Beta testers essentially get to play ahead of the general public to try and stress test the system under actual play conditions. Most usually, they'll try to learn as many exploits as possible, so even if they start out on brand new characters, they're still going to be far ahead of the pack, getting gear and coin ahead of others. Assume that the beta testers have watched things like SAO or other 'trapped in a video game' style series, and they're doing the same as Khargol is suggesting. Problem is, that's exactly what a bunch of them already did, and if the AI works like it's supposed to, then it's ready for them.
"For Valorian Saga, one of the biggest selling points was its adaptive AI system, a system that learns. What that means is that the system behind bosses has already learned those exploits from beta testers and has some sort of answer for them, and they're going to run dead into them."
Chrysta sat forward, leaning her elbows on the table, at least in part to show off her biceps, "Well if a speedrun is out of the question, then what do we do instead?"
Shelara cut back in, "But... shouldn't we try and go save the beta testers?"
I considered, "Shelara, in answer to your question, we can't. Even assuming we could catch up to wherever they're at, there's almost no chance they'd listen to us if we did. They're just as likely to assume we're rivals, or to think we're idiots, but regardless they won't be following our instructions just because we say so. As far as they're concerned, they already know this game, and we're a bunch of sprouts who are panicking. Even if we could get past that point, we don't know the game like they do, and we're more likely to end up needing saving before we ever get to them.
"As to the other question, Chrysta, what we do now is finish up the starter quests, then we use our flyers to join the militia."
Every MMO veteran groaned openly. Arkadi especially was annoyed at the concept, "Come on, man, faction-grinding on day two? We're not even out of the gate yet!"
I'd expected this, and checked my in-game clock, and swore under my breath. We needed to get moving, with only roughly eighteen minutes of daylight left, "Guys, that's why we need to join the militia. It's safe, and grinding up our faction rep with Valoria opens a lot of doors, not least of which is giving us barracks space to live in free of charge, basic equipment upgrades, and getting coin. That's just the short-term gains. Yeah, not much, but it gives us a foundation. We get the lay of the land, and we build up our strategies. There's another reason though, and it's important."
Khargol nodded, "As militia, we get arrest powers in line with the laws of Farrelston."
"Wait, we'd be cops?" Shelera seemed slightly hyped about the concept.
I nodded, "More or less. We aren't out in the main room right now cause everyone's losing their minds out there. They're all coming to terms with the idea that this place is where they might die, and that breeds desperate reactions. Fourteen million players split between fifty servers, giving an average server population of... two-hundred-eighty thousand per server give or take for server popularity. Assume maybe one percent of that go fully around the bend and get violent, and that gives us two thousand eight hundred violent criminals that just hit the city on this server that have the ability to level up within the system.
"Farrelston has to be a safe space for players to return to, but that can't happen if there isn't order, and that means law enforcement."
One of our newcomers made her presence felt, the elf woman from the cathedral, shaking as she spoke, "I'm Layala. What about my brother?"
Tom... "I don't know. I don't what happens to those who die in the game. Maybe they wake up, maybe they're just comatose in a hospital somewhere, or maybe they're gone."
I let it sink in for everyone. Layala's eyes fell to the table as she slowly wept. I hate this, but sugarcoating the thing wasn't good for anyone, "All I can work on right now is keeping us all alive. This is a fantasy RPG, so for all I know, there might be another way to get them back, but I don't want to get anyone's hopes up. Anyone who knows someone who didn't respawn, we'll keep a journal of names, to see that they're remembered. We chronicle the dead, and if the opportunity to get them back presents itself, we go all-in on it.
"I know we all have questions... but we can't stay here to answer them all, and I don't have all the answers for you. We need to start moving, and moving now. We've got thirteen people here, our five and the eight we added on. We've got enough people to form a guild when the time comes, so we should start acting like a guild now."
Layala's voice cracked, "I-I nominate Lugh."
I was startled. I've been very game-knowledgeable, but I wasn't the leader type. It was never my role in the group.
"I second the nomination."
Khargol. My head whipped around, "Look, guys, I'm not a leader. I know stuff, that's what I've got. Khargol's the one who leads."
Khargol shook his head, "Not here, not in this game. I'm all good for the tanking, but you're the only one of us who's putting out a plan of attack, and I'm getting more lost by the minute. It sucks dude, and it hurts to admit it to myself, but you're the guy this time."
Nods occurred, and by show of hands, I was almost unanimously elected to command the 'guild', minus my own dissenting vote. Well.... crapbaskets, "Alright, fine. I won't argue it, but we've gotta get a move on. Get the starter quests going, and when we unlock the job change system, we'll work things out from there. Until then, we'll break into three parties, two four-man parties, and one five-man. Khargol, you're in charge of the five-man, Temur and myself are the other party leaders for now. We'll meet at the barracks come sundown. We spread out the neos amongst the three parties so they're all protected, and we get started. Don't do any combat quests alone."
I picked up Shelera for my party's neo, along with Chrysta and Layala, and the parties agreed to meet up in front of the barracks around sunset so we could join up together. We fought the press of bodies in the tavern to get out into the streets, and headed off for our quests. I could feel my heart racing a bit, the whole thing feeling like some sort of bad dream, but we would need a minute to get things together, "Okay, let's check everyone's quest logs. Any shareable quests, share them with the group so we can all help out and get rewards. We tackle them from lowest to highest."
We moved through the streets to the first quest, running messages around the city for the heralds. The quest was designed to get new players oriented with the larger city of Farrelston and what factions existed within it. The vast majority of players though, were barely moving, either pressed into the tavern or milling about in front of the cathedral. This was a huge problem, and we were finding clusters of people around, hiding and trying to just deal with the enormity of it all. We were running messages to guards, merchants, and nobles on what was a very low-key questline while watching people crying or raging. Shelera moved up next to me, close to tears herself, "We can't do anything?"
a I halted, and looked around again, and noticed some people who weren't in groups. Solo players who had come in by themselves, the same as you'd see in any MMO, and now they were cut off from the world, friends, family, and no party. Solo players really only existed in MMOs, people who would just fill in the gaps, and otherwise keep to themselves, and it worked in the world of video games. In the real world, though, it wasn't good, "We can do a little."
I jogged over to where a powerfully built Dracon with a sword and shield was balled up on the ground, weeping, purple-scaled head buried in his arms. I knelt down next to him, laying a hand on his shoulder, "Hey, what's your character name?"
The Dracon boy looked up imploringly, his voice quavering, "Umbaar..."
"Hi, Umbaar. I'm Lugh, and these are my friends. Why don't you come with us? You can join our party," I kept my tone even by pleasant.
He nodded sheepishly and accepted the party invite, "My mom's gonna kill me. I wasn't even supposed to be playing the game."
Oh God, no, "How old are you, Umbaar?"
"I'll be fourteen in December."
Due to the nature of the game, the minimum age for Valorian Saga was eighteen. He'd likely gotten access to the rig, and just jumped on, and now he was trapped, "I'm sure right now, your mom's just worried about you, but we'll keep you safe. Come on, we've got quests to do."
The absurdity of our questing was fully growing with each step we took. After running messages, we helped the watch with investigating some local crimes to learn the search system, worked with merchants on trading to get the economy down, and along the way, we found some more solos to fill us out to the party cap of eight. The jobs were immaterial to me, but Shelera and Layala both found comfort in picking up more people, with the latter taking over care of Umbaar. NPCs went about their day's work, and I started to catch on to something, "Hey... is this day... running long to anyone else?"
Games don't use full twenty-four-hour days, using a shorter day and night cycle to give the impression of a world without having to artificially inflate the game to make it feel like a full day. Valorian Saga had, in the videos, been shown to have a twenty-minute day, and twenty-minute night, but as we ran around, it had been far more than twenty minutes now. The sun had barely moved in the sky, which given the rest of the game's level of detail wasn't something they would've ignored. Chrysta spoke up after counting her clock, "Uh... well dearheart, I do believe we've got us a twenty-four cycle now."
There were several possibilities to this, perhaps either our minds changed gear to work with in-game time, or the game had altered to have twenty-four-hour time. Either way, we had no answers for it. I was getting a bit sick of having more and more questions I couldn't answer, but I couldn't focus on it in the here and now. I called a halt, and we found a small corner tavern to get food and drink. I took some time with the menu system, and up popped the character status window.
By statistics, we were moving up a bit, but the main stats of our jobs weren't changing very much at all. My basic stats for movement had risen, but not by much, and the gain was tapering off. That was probably from all the walking around the city we were doing. Reputations were going up in the city guilds attached to our quests, but again, they were minor improvements, and the effective XP was tapering off from doing them. I took out my character journal, a system conceit by the devs that the game world was simply too grand in scale to not allow a lot of notetaking, and did stat-math just like when I would spreadsheet my builds at home. From what I could see, the game had no true 'leveling' system. Instead, skills and attributes were built up by how you played, sort of like in Skyrim, but the same actions would not keep getting you the same degree of XP. A common enough point, or else someone could pull a South Park and just merc wolves until they hit the cap. Abilities would unlock as your stats rose, some coming online automatically like Sprint, while others you had to find a trainer for, such as the Double Knock ability for archers. From what I'd seen online, the abilities would unlock advanced jobs, and certain combinations would unlock hybrid jobs, so a Paladin would be a combination of a knight and acolyte. None of the testers had gotten that far, however, they'd just seen the possibility of it.
I noticed Shelera leaning over to look at my journal, and I smiled, "Just doing nerd stuff, plotting my progression to figure out what jobs I need."
She smiled back, "That seems weirdly normal. What are you thinking of doing?"
"Well, for now, I need to move up my abilities as a Hunter, right? Hunter eventually leads to a few choices, so I'm thinking I'll probably go for a Ranger build. That means I can train up Yndress here as a battle companion."
Yndress had been flying about with me, and sometimes resting on my shoulder, and now, she was curled up by my arm on the table as I continued. Shelera reached over and petted Yndress, "That is so cool. She's so warm. I totally should've figured out a way to get the limited edition... so what should I be leveling up?"
"Well, you're a vagabond, so you might look at something like Bounty Hunter since we're working with the militia. Combine that with another job.... huh."
"What?"
Daeva grinned, "Oh, sweetie, he just worked somethin' out. What do you need, Lugh?"
"Give me a minute. I need to go to the scrivener," I shot up and stepped out of the tavern.
It wasn't far to the scrivener where I could buy the supplies I needed. We'd just done an ink delivery there, and now, I would need paper and ink to work with. Returning, I cleared off the tavern table and laid out a large scroll used for maps, currently unmarked, "Okay, I need everyone to bring up your character pages and stand where I can read them."
Gamers generally do have a sense of when someone's worked out an exploit, and this was one of those times. They brought up their screens so I could start marking down abilities, attributes, and skills. Of note, my Scibing ability was ticking slowly upward as I laid things out. Scribing could turn into runic writing and other more arcane and mundane pursuits. What I was working on became a skill tree system, with the various jobs being grouped together. I had to move things around, and in real life I wouldn't be able to do that with ink, but in the game sense, it was pretty simple. I kept moving around my drawing, finally starting to come into a workable initial system of abilities, jobs, and other things that built off of one another. It look a bit mad, like if no one had stopped the devs on Path of Exile's skill tree, but it was there, "We're thinking about this wrong. We need to get to the barracks. I don't want to explain this twice."
Banded back up, I stopped by our newest unlock: Carriage Stations. The city was entirely too big to be running around it all the time, and for just half a silver, we could go to any other ward in the city. I signaled the coachman, handing him my flyer, "Take us to the militia barracks."
The coachman nodded sharply, "Right you are, sir."
The coaches held four, so we split between the two, and I rechecked my numbers. I was pretty certain I was right by the math, but these things didn't always pan out like you wanted, so it was best to recheck. It still seemed to be working out like I thought, but I needed Temur for a blind study of it. We got out at the barracks, a building made up of fortified walls and barred windows with internal shutters. Militiamen NPCs were standing guard out front, while we could just see some working in the training yard to the side. From what I could see, however, we were the only players here.
Temur's party arrived first, and apparently, I wasn't the only one picking up strays as two carriages emptied of people. He was running a full party as well now, and grinning in his uniquely Temur way, even if he did have draconic features now, "So, I see we're all taking in the lost little lambs?"
"I mean, sure, why not? That's how we met, so why not do it here, too?"
He nodded, "Questing went well, if a bit hum-drum, but you have a look in your eyes that says you've worked something out. You got math time!"
I nodded, "Waiting for... yeah, Khargol went off-road, I see."
Temur and I had shown up with two carriages each, only for Khargol to pull up with four, all packed. That put our new numbers at thirty-two players as he practically bounced up to us, "What?!"
We both shook our heads, "Nothing, man. Never change. I've got some news for everyone."
The full mass moved over to the side of the building so we weren't obstructing the entrance, "Party people, I worked something out at lunch."
I rolled out my map of the skills tree, "Okay, so I was going over my character screen, and did some math. I know what we need to do: We need to move up on every job."
Khargol shook his head, "Isn't that gonna leave us as jacks of all trades? We'd be running pretty average."
I gestured with my hands a bit in dismissal, "Usually, you're right, but here, it's different. The stats aren't really separated here, they're intended for cross-classing, and it's not just the combat jobs. I moved up a bit at Scribing here, and it looks like it'll be the same for crafting and gathering jobs. Move up in X, Y, and/or Z jobs and you unlock a hybrid. So like, say you move up as a blacksmith, armorer, and weaponsmith. All three have abilities building into one another, and that can unlock further abilities, other jobs, a whole classification of things we can't see yet.
"Using abilities works up the stats associated with that ability, and the higher the ability, the more XP it generates for the stats. Those stats still stay there when you do a job change, so you could be a Gladiator working up strength by working the forge."
Shelera looked over the drawing, "Okay, so you think if we take every job up, then that'll make us a lot stronger? But won't we end up with a bunch of usless stats?"
I shook my head, "No, for two primary reasons. For one, what if instead of Paladin, you went something like a Hexblade in D&D terms? Or, Shelera, you take Bounty Hunter, then build up your hunter job to Scout, and you have something akin to a Justicar class? Or Khargol, what if you master every weapon group?"
Temur's interest was peaked at mention of Hexblade, "And what is the second reason?"
I sucked in a breath, "It's a job change system. There's a job change skill, and every basic skill I've seen has upgrades, even if I can't see the end of the trees yet. The adaptive AI is going to adapt to our individual tactics, but even if all of us were playing hunters, we'd all approach hunting differently, maybe more reliant on archery, or snares, or pets. It would force the AI to keep readapting its own tactics on the fly. If we build up, we might just be able to get to something better than the sum of our parts."
Karghol nodded, "And that makes it doubly important we get going on the militia stuff. Shall we?"
The lot of us went over to the barracks, where a guard greeted us at the door, "Hold, citizens. What is your business with the thirteenth Valorian militia?"
I stepped forward, "We're here to enlist for service."
The guard perked right up, "Ah, good. Greetings and well met! I am Sergeant-at-Arms Brant. We are in need of stalwart folk to help protect Farrelston and wider Valoria in these trying times. Dark things are afoot both at home and afar, and it speaks well of you that you would choose service. Please, enter the hall, and register yourselves with Yeoman Granger. Welcome once again, may the purple dragon fly eternal!"
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This is basically just me venting, but I've finally sta down and read Abyssals and Sidereals and they're good books. Well written, evocative. Some great changes to the fluff.
But they're formatted really badly as like.. reference books? In a way that's kind of crippling to use them in play. A lot of important information is spread throughout multiple different write-ups and that can make tracking down concrete information when you want to look something up a real pain.
Like, take the Loom of Fate. The Loom has always been confusing, and the version presented in 3e is probably the best version it's ever been. But the books font actually... Tell you what it is? There's a section on what Fate is, and ehat Destiny is, and how Destiny is written. But the only concrete writeup we get for the Loom is is in the Lexicon. Which means that to really understand it you have to dig deep into quite a few writeup
And like, that's loom which has always been confusing so I could forgive that. But there's lots of issues like that. The Calendar of Setesh barely gets explained in a sidebar, important information is left out because it's covered in another book, etc.
They're still good books, but it feels like they aren't well edited for clarity.

This is going to be fairly long and probably somewhat depressing post, but I've been wanting to share my story even if it's just with the void.
I remember waking up with some pain in my groin area one morning during my senior year of high school. At the time I didn't think much of it at the time since I'm a tall person and waking up with random pains happens to me frequently. So I walked around with a limp, and the pain persisted. It was like that for a couple of weeks. Eventually my mom and I agreed that I needed to see someone about it. Unfortunately I had fell into the dangerous trap of looking up my symptoms online to try and see what might be wrong with me. I ended up convincing myself that I had a hernia, and when I went to see the doctor on Halloween, I was having difficulty explaining my symptoms to him. My answers to his questions all suggested that something was wrong with my groin muscles, I might've even said the words, "I think it might be a hernia." The doctor was sure that wasn't the problem, but thanks to me downplaying my symptoms, he diagnosed me with a pulled muscle. His advice was to not exercise for a week, even though the pain had lasted for weeks at that point, and the only exercise I did regularly was ride my bike to school (roughly 2 miles round trip). I didn't listen to him, in fact that evening I was running around through my neighborhood on Halloween with my friends. One last hurrah for our senior year. Exactly one week later, my leg gave out on me and I collapsed on the floor walking to my next class. The tumor had grown so big, and I ended up shattering my femur.
I instantly knew my leg was broken, and I was rushed to the hospital. They found the tumor fairly quickly, but were unsure how to proceed. Surgery was a given, as the damage to my leg was massive, but they were also unsure whether or not the tumor was malignant or benign. So I stayed in the hospital for a couple of days living off of painkillers while I waited for the results of the biopsy to come in, and for the surgery to begin. It turned out to be a Ewing's Sarcoma, luckily still localized, even if I didn't feel very lucky at the time. I was sent into surgery immediately where they removed the tumor and gave me a prosthetic femur. The recovery process was really difficult for me. I'll never be able to run or jump anymore (which sucks because I love playing basketball). I walked around with a cane for a while; that was one of the most embarrassing experiences of my life. I still remember all of the weird/sympathetic looks I received. And to this day, I still have difficulty with my mobility, and I walk around with a visible limp. It's difficult to make up excuses for when people ask me why I'm limping, I'll usually just explain that I have a prosthetic femur without mentioning the cancer part, since that kills the vibe.
I started chemo in December of 2019, but the typical treatment regiment was thrown off, thanks to me breaking my leg. Usually the doctors will give around 15 weeks of chemo with heavy and quick dosages, followed by surgery, and then another 15 weeks of chemo. The surgery came first in my case. Chemo was the hardest part of my battle. My dosage was a lot, I had to stay in the hospital overnight so that they could keep me attached to an IV the whole time. It was every other week, and for the etoposide and ifosfamide weeks, it was 5 days at a time. What was difficult though was being away from my friends. I was apart of a very tight knit group of guys. We played DND every Friday after school which I missed greatly in the hospital. My friends were still very supportive, and they tried to include me in any way they possibly could. But I was still really lonely. One of my worst memories was crying on my birthday, because my parents wouldn't let me hang out with my friends for fear of getting sick. I was very suicidal at this point, the chemo made me horribly sick, and I hated staying overnight at the hospital. But then COVID came around in March, and I think that sort of gave me my second wind.
Everything moved online, and I was able to talk with my friends nearly everyday. We played games online together, including DND. I remember one of my friends mentioning to me that at graduation it was going to be so awesome when they called my name, and I would be able walk across the stage in front of everyone, hopefully to a loud applause. It was silly, but that was the light at the end of the tunnel for me. I looked forward to being able to stand in front of my classmates, and sort of say look what I've accomplished. Obviously graduation never happened, but I wasn't too beat up over it, since I finished my treatment in June. I was really looking forward to college, and to meet new people, even if I settled on a school that I wasn't really interested in going to. I didn't want my college decision to be a burden on my parents, especially after all I had put them through. Plus it was a good idea for me to stay local so I could still see my same doctors.
College sucked though. I couldn't make any new friends since everything was virtual, and I hated my online classes. I had an image in my mind of what my life post-cancer would look like, and it was nothing like the reality I was living in. My hair wasn't growing back after the chemo, I was stuck at home with my parents, and college sucked. I didn't care anymore at that point. I didn't try in any of my classes, I remember turning in an assignment in which I had done none of the work, instead I just scribbled all over my paper. I received the lowest grade I had ever earned in my schooling career that quarter. Come December, I hated life. I had built up such grand expectations, and my time during COVID was miserable.
In March of 2021, I relapsed, and the cancer came back. My doctors suspected that it returned because we weren't able to properly treat it the first time. It was still localized, but at this point I was convinced I was going to die. I understood that the tumor coming back was a bad sign, and I was overcome with anxiety. The chemo wasn't as bad this time around, they tried different drugs, none of which required that I stay overnight. I still had to come in 5 days per week on treatment weeks, and was still super sick from the drugs, but at least I didn't have to spend the night. I ended up dropping all of my classes that quarter, and thanks to my mom, I decided to take online GE classes at my local community college over the summer. But I had new problems this time around. Since I was first diagnosed when I was 17, I was being treated by the pediatric oncologists, so I got my chemo dosages in the pediatric clinic. Seeing kids with cancer on a daily basis was difficult. I experienced guilt, shame, and was embarrassed to even think that I had it rough. To this day the survivor's guilt weighs heavily on me. I cried nearly every night during this treatment cycle, whether that was because I was fearful of dying, not being able to live the life I wanted, or having to see kids and parents in such pain.
I finished my treatment for the second time in December of 2021. I felt nothing this time around. I didn't know what I wanted to do, I was lost. I stuck with my classes at community college, but I wasn't making any new friends or doing anything that I really wanted to do. I ended up taking all of my credits, and transferring to a different university. I was optimistic this time around, but still disappointed that I wasn't going to get the real college experience. It was around this time when most of my friends from high school were moving out, getting ready to start their new lives. The school that I transferred to was 20 minutes from my house, going anywhere farther was out of the question at this point, since I figured the cancer was likely going to come back any second now. I commuted for my classes, but had difficulty making any friends. For my first semester at this new school, September 2022, I still walked around with a cane, and my hair hadn't grown back properly. I was embarrassed by the way I looked, and still am to this day. I think about not having hair every single day, and have the same recurring dream once a month in which my hair is starting to grow back properly, only to wake up and feel the top of my head. I hate the way I look, and I hate the fact that I can't walk around in public without a hat.
More scans came and went, and they all turned up negative, even though I had a scare recently in which they found some lesions in my liver and had to perform a biopsy. I've been in remission for about 2 and a half years now, but have been stuck in a rut. I'll chat with my high school friends every once in a while online, but I have no social life outside of that. I spend my Fridays and weekends reading fantasy and comic books, sometimes watching movies. I just feel so lonely. I struggle so much with letting my real personality show and am completely socially inept. It feels like I have barriers in front of me that I can't seem to break down. I've dealt with social anxiety nearly all of my life and I think these problems have only been exasperated from the years of limited social contact. Even at my work, it feels like my coworkers think I'm weird and don't want to interact with me.
Writing this I feel ashamed, because I know it could be so much worse. In another world, I died in the battle with cancer. In another world I had to go through all of that without the support system that I had. I truly believe that I wouldn't have been able to get through all of it without my parents, my friends, all the nurses who treated me, and my talented doctors. Sometimes I think that maybe the cancer and my current situation is deserved, punishment for the things I've done in the past that I'm not proud of. I was so convinced that this most recent liver scare was definitely the cancer coming back to finally finish the job since I'm not worthy of all of the opportunities and privileges I've been given. While I was waiting to get the biopsy done, I challenged myself to be the best person I could possibly be, going out of my way to do random kind things that I wouldn't normally do. Just in case if there is a higher power, maybe it would be more merciful, or if I really was going to die, maybe I could try to put some good into the world before I go. But since it came back negative, I've failed my challenge. I fallen back into the same old habits of indifference.
Thanks for reading all of this, if you've made it this far. I want to end on a positive note, since I am blessed to be in the position that I am today. I've fallen in love with my studies and am excited to pursue grad school once I graduate in a year. I love my job as a tutor for my school's learning resource center, and want to pursue a career teaching. I love my family and the friends that I have. Regardless of how difficult things get in the future, I'm still determined to give it all my best try. It would be selfish of me to not give it everything I can.

Hey, everyone. I recently turned 18, and I really need help.
I’m typing this on my phone about to go to bed, but I just joined this group.
I’ve been struggling with masturbation for around a few years, but I’ve been struggling with pornography all my life.
Every time I masturbate, I pray afterwards. In all honesty, I do it believing that if Jesus were to come right now, he would have sympathy or pity for me. But as I’m writing this, I just feel stupid.
I used to be an altar server and went to Mass twice a week, and as a result I just feel bored during Mass. I haven’t gone to Mass on my own volition since COVID. I always yawn, and I don’t feel God.
With the preface above, during my prayers after masturbation, I don’t feel anything. I don’t feel God, but I also don’t feel remorse or guilt. I’m feeling like my entire relationship with God is built upon me hoping for eternal life and not building a relationship with him.
I’ve recognized that I’m very selfish these past few years. I want eternal life, I want worldly pleasures, I want all these things. But, I just don’t feel, I guess, happy with the Lord. I don’t feel fulfilled. I just serve myself, and I don’t want to seek the Lord, just eternal life. And I don’t know how to seek the Lord anymore.
I can’t focus during prayer, my thoughts wonder. I don’t know what to do. I downloaded the Bible app and did the daily prayer, but they changed it, and I don’t pray anymore except before meals.
I really want to say it’s a pornography addiction, as I don’t feel anything when I masturbate anymore. I just watch it, and I act. Whenever I even remotely think about it, whether at morning or night, I just think of the night when I’ll be able to masturbate.
And, I want to believe in God—well as I said, I think I just want eternal life—but I’m so logical and calculation-based, that I just don’t know what to think. Because I think of all the recorded miracles, the probability of this world happening, the incorruptibles, but then I think of maybe it’s all just one possible accident. I don’t know what to say.
I definitely think I might need therapy. I’m so afraid of death, but I just struggle with my faith.
I’ve even tried putting Bible quotes around my phone, like in Safari where I often try to get pornography. I just ended up going incognito on reddit. So I joined this, so that if I ever open reddit again, I’ll see this community. But even then, I don’t know if I’ll follow through.
I say that because even right before masturbation or sometimes even during it, I think about God. But I don’t stop, I can’t stop. I need the euphoria. When I want to masturbate, I am going to masturbate.
Whenever I think about God, I only try to believe in him I think for the sake of being saved. But I just don’t feel any remorse or guilt anymore when I commit these actions. I wouldn’t say I’m unsavable, but I definitely feel that way.
Additionally, I’ve been masturbating to a certain genre, that I won’t delve too much into, but I will describe how it affects me. It’s a sort of hobby, and I truly find the non-sexual aspect cool, but whenever I see it, I just feel invigorated to masturbate. I don’t know how to be involved in the activity non-sexually.
And then, I’ve been struggling with just being a good Catholic. I’ve been confirmed, but I’m such a hypocrite. I criticize others for anything that doesn’t relate to the Lord, but then I struggle in doing anything remotely good. I don’t know what to do.
I apologize for going point to point with no concise manner, but I’m just going on my tangent of thoughts to express myself. I thank everyone who read this. Please help, I don’t know how, but I guess anything. I’m selfish, and I don’t know if I really even want to repent, but I don’t know how to describe how I’m feeling. I feel like the only way I can be mentally fixed from the cycle is through restarting or just hoping that the Lord can do something when we go to Heaven.

Hi all,
I posted a while ago seeking advice on where to start with my graduate studies, but I haven't taken that advice yet because I'm unsure about which type of master's program in research to pursue. I'm leaning towards a non-thesis route in wildlife studies. My background includes two REUs focused on marine or coastal environments, and my research experience spans birds, prairie dogs, badgers, zooplankton (with a publication in progress), pipefish, and moray eels. In essence, I've explored a variety of fields.
However, I'm still undecided between marine biology, wildlife biology, or natural resources. There are numerous research opportunities available, but I want to focus on conservation on endangered species or predator work. My goal is to work for the federal government and be near the coast. I love animals, particularly mammals and predators, but I'm struggling to narrow down my options. How did you all decide on your paths?
I am passionate about research, fieldwork, and lab tech jobs, as these were significant parts of my undergraduate experience. After taking a gap year, I'm now looking for programs starting in fall 2025. One professor who has inspired me, and who works with animals I love (like wolverines), plans to meet with me to discuss opportunities in his lab next year since I’ve read so many of his papers in conservation work on wolverines. This is definitely my plan A, but I want to explore other programs as well in the coast too obviously knowing wolverines aren’t in the beachy areas but they are just one of the animals I ended up falling for especially writing about them for a class using the professor research and I saw his work and graduate students experiences, really amazing.
Ideally, I'd like to find a program near the coast, whether it's focused on terrestrial or marine research. As a natural resources and ecology major, most prerequisites for a Marine Biology MS degree aren't applicable to me, and I'm not keen on taking extensive physics or chemistry courses. Does anyone have any advice? What would be an ideal major to help me narrow down and dive into a specific field? I've been spending hours every day trying to figure this out.

I have been going out clubbing on girls night about once a month, and it morphed into me sitting on the couch while my friends flirted and made out with guys. I would talk to the 'spare' guy, but absolutely no flirting, kissing or touching.
I know two of the girls in the group from uni, and the rest of the girls are friends of friends. We would go clubbing (where I live has quite the night life, and my city is a bit of a tourist destination, so it's always busy), have a few drinks and dance, then head home. The last few times I went with them (I usually only go once a month, but most of them seem to go every week, or even twice a week), my friends have been meeting guys rather than just dancing, and then going back to someone's place to flirt and make out. One of the group, who I have dubbed Barracuda (she honestly scares me and totally gives off that vibe) lives with her bf, but when he was away for work was when the girls would invite guys back to her house. Barracuda has been doing a lot of flirting with the guys who come back with our group, and more than once she has gone to one of the bedrooms with a guy for an hour or so. I'm honestly a bit naive and always assume the best of people, but even I'm guessing she has cheated on her boyfriend. She doesn't kiss or make out with anyone in the public areas of the house where I can see, but what else would they be doing in a bedroom for that long?
It gets a little worse. My girl friends never wanted me to bring along my fiancé, because he'll "cramp their style" for what's basically become making out with guys. I get pretty bored sitting around waiting for my friends to finish flirting or kissing these guys, so I would sometimes sit and talk with the 'spare' guy who wasn't paired up with one of my friends. I felt super guilty about hanging out with these guys when my fiancé is waiting for me at home, but I also feel guilty about leaving these guys sitting there waiting on their friends. I never flirt or touch them or kiss them, but the thought of my handsome, kind, generous fiancé sitting at home while I'm chatting to guys had me twisted up with guilt. I don't know exactly how I got into this situation, but my fiancé has gently pointed out to me a couple of times that I can be a bit of a people pleaser, so there's that. 🥲
So based on many comments on my first two posts, and some hard thought on my end, I decided to claim I was busy (not hard since we are part-way through my exam block for uni) and not attend the next girls night, until I could figure out how to tell my fiancé what was going on. In my last two posts, I got some good advice on how to broach the topic, so I was just figuring out the best one to suit me.
I told my fiancé that I wasn't going out for girl's night this weekend because some of the girls made me uncomfortable, but he just nodded and didn't say anything, staring off into the distance. I was kinda bummed because I was hoping that would prompt some questions which would lead to a conversation in a natural way. I tried again by telling him I was cutting contact with the girl group, but he didn't really react to that either.
Frankly, he seemed kind of out of it all week, really distracted and giving short answers, staring off into the distance a lot. He hadn't rejected me when I hugged him or snuggled or kissed, but he never initiated this last week, which isn't normal. I figured he was stressed from work, but his behaviour kinda weirded me out.
Come the night of girls night, I was sitting in the lounge room watching some reality TV (trashy, I know, but I was really on edge and needed a distraction) and idly going through my notes for my upcoming exams. My fiancé had been in his study all day (catching up on work even though it was a Saturday) when he finally emerged. He stopped dead, his expression surprised, and asked me what I was doing. I told him I was waiting for him to finish work so we could spend some time together. He got this really weird expression on his face, and didn't seem to know what to say. I reminded him that I had decided not to go to the girls night out, and had told him earlier in the week. He still didn't seem to know what to say, and didn't ask any questions.
Eventually, he told me that a friend of his needed some help, and he'd be gone a few hours. I asked if he'd like me to come, and I swear his face got an almost terrified expression on it. I told him I could change if he needed me to (I was dressed in some jeans and a t-shirt), but he said it would be best if I didn't get involved. Which was a super weird thing to say, but this week has been super weird all up. He then left, and I took the opportunity to finish writing my thoughts out and prepare for how to tell him. An hour or so after my fiancé left, I started getting weird text messages from a couple of my girl friends. Apparently, Barracudas bf came back in a surprise visit, and caught her red-handed. I got some accusatory text messages asking if I set her up or something. I texted back for more details, but then I think I got blocked.
At first, I thought I was lucky I hadn't been there, but it gets more complicated.
My fiancé came home around midnight, and I rushed to the door to give him a hug and let him know what was going on with my girl friends (at least what I could figure out). But he held me at arms length, which really hurt. I asked what the hell was going on, in a fairly straightforward manner (not usual for me), and he looked startled, but asked me to come with him to the lounge room. We sat down, and he dispassionately told me about Barracudas bf installing a door cam, and figuring out his gf was cheating on him. He'd planned to catch her in the act by pretending to fly to work the day before and stay in a hotel, but he also contacted my fiancé since I was the only other attached girl in the situation. My fiancé planned to turn up and catch me in the act if I was cheating as well.
At this point, I burst into tears because I don't handle confrontation well, and I couldn't get any words out between sobs. I was an absolute mess - this wasn't a couple of tears and glimmering eyes like in the movies. It was an ugly cry with snot and my entire face blotchy. I couldn't explain myself and just shoved the paper I'd been writing my thoughts out on at him while blubbering incoherently.
He found me a box of tissues, and I tried to clean myself up while he read through my somewhat disjointed notes. In the end, he asked me point blank if I had ever cheated on him, and I remember shaking my head vehemently, and trying to deny it through tears. He nodded, saying some of my girl friends there that night has vouched for me, though they seemed convinced I had ratted Barracuda out to her bf. He asked me if I had known what Barracuda was up to, and my tears had subsided enough that I was able to explain that I suspected what she was up to, but hadn't seen anything myself.
He rolled his eyes at that, looking exasperated, and asked me what would anyone think at that point. I started crying again, but managed to get out that I hadn't felt it was any of my business, but that I had wanted to tell him, and that's why I had drafted the notes.
My fiancé raised his voice at this, and started shouting about how he would want to know if he was being cheated on, and people who know about cheating and don't say anything are almost as bad as cheaters. His voice was still loud as he told me he was really angry at my lack of boundaries, and staying there to talk to guys had violated his trust. I was shocked at this point. My normally quietly assertive fiancé was shouting, and I couldn't recall that ever happening before. Sure, we'd had some arguments in three years of dating, but we rarely even raised our voices and always kept things civil. This time, his jaw was clenched and veins were standing out in his neck and forehead. His eyes were wild, and I admit I got this little tingle of attraction that I couldn't explain. I should have felt worried because I'd never seen him so angry, but I still felt totally safe with him.
He calmed himself down pretty quickly, and I thought maybe we'd start sorting things out. But then he looked at me, and it was really sad, combined with some betrayal and a tiny bit of contempt. He'd never looked at me like that before, and suddenly I knew we were NOT okay. I started sobbing again, and he told me he was sleeping in the guest room, and we'd talk more in the morning.
I honestly think I was still in shock and reacting slowly, because before I knew it, my fiancé had collected his pillow and phone charger, and the guest room door was locked. I pounded on the door a bit, and begged him to talk to me, but he ignored me. I eventually went to sleep in our usual bed, wearing his favourite hoodie that smelled like him. In the morning, my fiancé was waiting for me in the kitchen/informal dining area.
He told me that I had broken his trust by hanging out 1-on-1 with guys instead of having him there, and not reporting what was happening in terms of cheating. What really sucks is that he wasn't even a tiny bit wrong. I know that now, and my guilt earlier kinda told me I knew earlier as well. I apologised profusely, saying I would never do anything like that ever again. I asked him what I could do to earn his trust back, and his answer had me flabbergasted. He said I needed to move out, "get my crap together", get some counselling, and build better boundaries. After that, he might be able to trust me again, when he'd seen that I'd made some big changes, but it wasn't an automatic thing, and we might not get back together.
I felt like I was in an alternate universe. I managed to stammer out that I didn't have money for counselling, or enough to pay for food, petrol, and bills, let alone rent. Couldn't I stay here and make it up to him?
He refused, saying I needed to move out on my own and go to counselling. That it would be an important first step in building some proper boundaries. I burst into tears again at this point, and begged him not to break up with me and kick me out, that I loved him and wanted to be with him. He said he loved me too, but it hurt to look at me right now, and he needed space.
It took me a couple of minutes to calm myself down. Once I could talk coherently again, I told him I understood, and wanted to give him that space, but I had nowhere to go. I know there's a worldwide housing crisis, and many fellow Redditors will be familiar with the problem of finding housing. Where I live, it's a common practice to outbid others on rent by simply offering to pay more. Apparently, there's some legislation coming soon to my state to fix that, but it sure ain't here now, and finding affordable housing at short notice is practically impossible. I am also halfway through my exam block (which I've been studying hard for, but still have two exams left), and this was going to be incredibly disruptive to my studies. Honestly, I was trying not to hyperventilate - my fiancé was breaking up with me, I had to move out with zero notice, couldn't think of anywhere to live, I was halfway through super stressful exams for my Masters, and I wouldn't be able to pick up more work shifts with my current study load for at least another week.
My fiancé said he'd organised some short term accommodation for me, and I needed to pack some bags. I was in shock. He walked to the bedroom and pulled out my suitcases as I followed him on autopilot, then we packed almost silently together. It was the most surreal feeling as I watched most of my belongings make their way into my luggage. I realised just how much my fiancé had bought for me over the three years we were together - clothing, shoes, make-up. My phone and laptop had been gifts, as he wanted me to have the best to do well at uni. He'd bought me entire outfits so I could feel beautiful while helping him schmooze at his business parties. My smart watch, that I really only wore at the gym. Some noise cancelling headphones so I could focus on uni assignments and exam prep. He'd even bought me the luggage we were packing in, for a couple of overseas holidays we'd gone on over the years. I managed to sneak his pillow in place of mine, and I was still wearing his hoodie from sleeping in it.
Before I knew it, all my stuff was in the backseat of my little hatchback, and he took one look at me and said he'd drive me to the temporary accommodation. He gently pushed me in the passenger side and did up my seatbelt, then got in the driver's side and started driving. He drove north a few suburbs, getting closer to my university, and pulled into some underground parking for high rise apartment buildings. He parked, we got some of my luggage out, and took the lift without saying a word. I was still trying to process everything, but suddenly realised I was about to lose my perfect fiancé over stupidly keeping my mouth shut when I shouldn't have. I managed to get my arms around him, and clung on like a baby koala and wouldn't let go. I was blubbering that I loved him and would do anything, even wearing all the lingerie he had bought for me. 🫣 He was blushing at that, but managed to push my luggage out of the lift, and then lumbered down the hallway with me clinging on him with both my arms and legs wrapped around him. A family with young children was coming out of their apartment and saw us, watching shocked as I clung to him, blubbering and making wild promises of all the things I would do to him in bed, as he tried to open the door to my temporary accommodation. He got it open, and then the husband of the little family helped him get all the luggage from the lift and inside the door as I continued crying and begging him not to break up with me. He thanked the man, then got the door closed, and waddled with me into the bedroom. We flopped back onto the bed together, and I started kissing his neck and giving the little nibbles he likes on his neck and ears, although the effect was kinda ruined as I'd been crying a lot, and was snotty again at this point. He got me some tissues from the night-stand next to the bed, and I cleaned up, but still had my legs locked around his waist. He managed to disentangle me, then stood up. I was about to grab him again, but his face was kinda cold, and I shrank back, feeling humiliated.
He asked for the engagement ring back, and the waterworks started again as I struggled to get the ring off my finger with shaking hands. I managed it, then threw it at him in a pique of anger. That beautiful diamond and white gold ring hit him in the chest, but he just caught it on the rebound, and it didn't even hurt the heartless man at all. He said he'd text me all the details I'd need for where I'm now staying, and that I should reach out to my work to see if I could get more shifts to make ends meet. I was just getting angry at this point, and told him to get lost. And with that, he left, the door banging shut behind him.
It's mid-afternoon, and so much has gone down in such a short time. The entire course of my life has changed in what amounted to one evening and a morning. Less than 24 hours. I'm sitting on the tiny balcony that this one bedroom apartment has, huddled in my ex-fiancé's hoodie to keep warm from the stiff sea breeze, about ten floors up and looking out at the blue-grey sea. True to his word, he texted me the address of where I'm staying, details on how to pay the rent and bills (he was careful to say twice that I didn't need to pay any rent for the next two weeks due to my studies), details on the included parking space and the code for the parking lot gate. He must have got all this ready during the week leading up the night I'm now referring to as 'Operation Barracuda'. No wonder he was standoffish.
Ugh, I can't start crying again. My eyes hurt, but my heart hurts more. I just completely blew up my life with some lies of omission, and destroyed my ex-fiancé's trust in me. At least I have a counselling session to look forward to. He texted me the details of my first session, which he carefully booked around my uni classes and exams. He said the first dozen sessions are already paid for. He's broken up with me, but still looking after me. Dammit, I'm crying again.
So, Reddit, is it really over with my ex-fiancé? Is there anything I can do to get back together with him, or is it truly over? I know I need to focus on my studies, especially since I'm partway through my exam block, and I need to pick up a lot more work shifts when my vacay starts in mid-June. I have counselling lined up. What else should I be focused on? What pieces of my life do I try and pick up? Do you think there's anything constructive I can do with my ex-fiancé?
TL;DR I had been going out clubbing on girls night about once a month, and it morphed into me sitting on the couch while my friends flirted and made out with guys. I would talk to the 'spare' guy, but absolutely no flirting, kissing or touching. My fiancé found out from another girls bf, who was being cheated on. I had hesitated to tell my fiancé about it, as I had previously felt it wasn't any of my business. I had plans to tell my fiancé, but he found out first, felt I had poor boundaries, then broke up with me and kicked me out with less than a day's notice.

I’m about halfway through Fourth Wing, and I might be making too many early judgements about it, but I’m kind of struggling to continue with this writing.
I really really love the idea of Fourth Wing, from its world building, to everything about the dragons, to the fact that it’s “academia” fantasy. I love the idea of “dragon rider college”, forming rivalries and friendships, getting tested again and again mentally and physically, forming bonds with dragons, and also having a romance.
Unfortunately, the writing has not been pulling through for me. I don’t think the protagonist is for me, and the whole “sexy enemies to lovers” romance with her and her love interest isn’t that appealing either. The vibe is more focused on making the pairing seem super hot and full of sexual tension than actually “romantic” if that makes sense. I’m just not charmed!
I also don’t think I’m a fan of this style of YA writing either— the constant cursing, middle fingers, edginess, and blatant statements when we could just clue ourselves in with subtext is kind of getting to me.
I’m really disappointed, because I truly want to love this book— and I AM enjoying a lot of it. I WANT to fall for this love interest, root for the main character, and fully dive into this book, but I feel like I’m being held back from truly enjoying it because of the elements I mentioned above.
I hope any fan of Fourth Wing isn’t offended by this, because I absolutely understand the appeal of the story and I will be finishing it. I was just looking for some recommendations because I think Fourth Wing is really close to what I AM looking for.
Here are some things I’d like to see:

• a likeable main character that has a personality that can stand on its own regardless of how “cool” their abilities may be. I want to really feel for them, root for them, admire their accomplishments, and get angry for them when they’re wronged. It’s not that I DON’T like Violet!! I just don’t think I’m a fan of the snarky protagonist trope. Give me a protagonist where it makes total sense for the “overpowered sexy” love interest to fall in love with them.
  
• As for romance, I do enjoy a really good slow burn. And I mean slow burn!!! Not “gods he’s so handsome it’s painful” every other page after they meet. I don’t mind if the romance is more of a side story— I look forward to every interaction more if they’re sparse. But I want pining, I want quick soft moments that aren’t overblown, I want their relationship to actually make sense within the context of the story. Enemies should actually feel like enemies. I also don’t really care for stories that follow “tropes” like enemies to lovers step-by-step. It doesn’t feel as natural to me!
  
• I’m pretty flexible when it comes to the fantasy element of the story. I like academia settings, not only because there’s an inherent competitiveness in them but also the way it can easily introduce characters (classmates, professors, etc) and fun moments (exams, dance nights, general student tomfoolery). I think that’s half the reason why people loved Harry Potter, too. THAT BEING SAID! I don’t mind what the story is about, and what the magic system is like, or if there are dragons or not. I just ask that it’s engaging enough!
  
• I would like for the side characters— not just the main character and love interest, to truly be relevant and interesting as well, not just “the friend that follows you from the start of the journey”. Let me root for various relationships, not just the romantic one!!! I love found family
  
• I would like for the writing to not be filled with snarky/quirky throwaway lines or for curse words to be thrown between every word. I curse all the time and I think in the right instance, in the right moment it can absolutely have an impact. But definitely not all the time..
  

That’s all I can think of. Hopefully there’s something out there that you think will be a good fit!! Thanks!

Hiii! I’m Gabe and I’m 18 years old from Brazil.
This is not asking for advice because I kinda know there’s nothing I can do, but still I want to vent with you because I don’t have any gay friends to hear me trying to make this gay love story happen.
Well, there is this guy, John (18), who was my very best friend, until he said some things that hurt me and we stopped talking about a year before the pandemic.
After the pandemic, when classes went back to being in person, we started talking again and became best friends one more time.
One day, more specifically, the last period of the morning of the Friday of May 21st, 2021, he came out to me in the middle of our geography class! Just to clarify, it was a complete surprise for me, since he always talked about girls and other straight stuff.
In details, a girl threw a paper ball that accidentally hit him. One of her friends joked about her having a crush on him and the paper was a love letter. After we laughed at it, he whispered to me that even if it was true, it didn’t matter because he likes the same “fruit” as her. I was in complete shock and joy!
After that, we never talked about that again, since he only came out to me and didn’t plan to tell anyone else and we were almost never alone to actually talk more about it.
After that, I kinda developed a crush on him.
Thinking about it, why would he only tell me about it? Ok, I was his best friend and everything, but there were more signals.
I can say with property, we were the top 2 students of our class and very nerdy, so we always had this friendly rivalry with grades and answering teachers and other things, and he would ALWAYS pick on me in these situations. I knew that he didn’t hate me because we were friends, because for an outsider it was almost a nerd war lol.
Well, after that, every year on May 21st I always remembered him of his coming out day.
After a year or so, we kind of grew apart and became more distant, still, he would always pick on me and I just loved it! And my crush on him grew each day more and more.
I’ve always been close to everyone in my class, so me his new friends were also pretty cool, which made it easier for me to talk to him even though he didn’t make part of my group anymore. And his friend even offered me to be part of their group, which John “vetoed” and said that everyone but me.
Y’all see where this is going? I started to think that he was avoiding me because he liked me and even though I sound delusional, but it was very clear that, at least, he didn’t hate me, specially in chemistry and math classes, where he would look at me every time teachers asked a question, or on Portuguese classes, where he would always come to me to compare grades.
After all, I can conclude he was trying to avoid me not to (maybe?) rise suspicion about him being gay — a secret confided in me by him and that I never told anyone, EVER!
My world kind of fell in our graduation party, where I finally asked him if he wanted to make out with me, and he said no. Although I didn’t take it 100% as a rejection, ‘cause there were a lot of people there and he could’ve just be shy and afraid (writing that down makes me feel even more delusional lmao, but trust me, he’s very shy socially and his whole family was there).
After that, we still wished happy birthday to each other (so I guess we’re cool?), but other than that, never talked again after school ended.
He still lives in my city, and the thing is, I still have a crush on him after all that! And I really think he liked me too! But I really don’t have the guts to talk to him and, even though I had, I had a very extensive foot surgery to correct a birth problem and I can’t walk or leave home much for the next year almost!
Well, I think this ends here, the post and this almost love story. Even though I’m still trying to create courage to hit him up.
Thank you all for reading! And If you’d like, share your thoughts!
Byeee

Yall…i messed up. Okay so for context, I got another job and when I was talking about with my dad, I misunderstood him thinking that he wanted me to put in my 2 weeks to work full time over there(it’s a part time job but their part time hours go up to 8 hrs I believe so it’s a full time by kohls standards). I put my 2 weeks on Wednesday(May 29) and it should’ve ended June 11 but I got a terminated email on June 2z
Now for the problem. After I realized my dad wanted me to work both jobs, on June 4, I found the manager and told her the mix up and asked her if there was still a way to reverse it since my 2 weeks isn’t officially up.(Side note: Im VERY intimidated by her. Whenever she’s in the store, I avoid her of all costs because she makes me so nervous. I don’t even call her when she’s at the store helping around with bopus or fixing the fixtures. I call on the other supervisors and hope she doesn’t come in to help me. This information is very important)
She says that she can but she was hesitant to because she said she was in a meeting and heard that ever since I put in my 2 weeks, i’ve been disconnected like not helping around as much, not engaging, sitting down on the benches in the women’s fitting rooms and this threw me off so bad yall. I didn’t even know what to say because none of that was true because:
Not helping around: if it’s with coworkers, i’m helping out everytime because 9/10 im scheduled, im the only person on the floor who can back up registers and covers breaks(sometimes for Amazon too). If it’s for customers, not a lot of customers come to me for help. they would just ask me where the price checkers are, I tell them that we removed them, and check the price on the zebra or tell them where a certain area is(shoes, swimsuits, amazon)
Not engaging: Im assuming she meant not talking to coworkers and…yeah. I’m not a talkative person unless I know you or am comfortable. It’s to the out where my coworkers would even be shocked that i’m working because i don’t say anything unless i need help but i’m not rude. If you need help or make small talk, i’ll talk but i’ll be awkward about it(introvert gang).
Sitting down in the fitting room benches: ok now this i can give a pass because i understand how it could come off that way but when i would sit on the benches, I would organize the folded clothes on there by brand. Plus i find it easier that may since my hard is usually full of hanged clothes to be put back on the floor. So that I understand and i never thought it was an issue because the supervisors/LODs would walk past me and tell me to work on an area after im done or say hi because they’re doing bopus.
Now, as she said the reason why she was hesitant. I got really nervous because she gave me the strict manager and mom start so I was standing there 🧍🏾‍♀️😟💦 sweating bullets. So guess what I did :)
I agreed with :)
every :)) single :))) thing :)))) she :))))) said :))))))))))))))))))))))
I even made a little 😁fun😁 speech about why everything she said was correct
“Why did you do that?!” I don’t know. I honestly cannot tell you why I did that because my mind blanked when I realized I was in trouble with HER of all people. So, she told me to change my availability so match with my schedule at my others job and i’m just nodding at everything she’s saying at this point. So, i go to the back and do the availability sheet and as i’m sitting there, cooling down, i realized that i really f’ed up. I try to talk to her again, but she was busy helping sephora so I decided to talk to her later that day when i clock-in in the evening but i voicing talk to her because i was busy helping a customer on registers and decided to talk to her Thursday when I work.(This is all tuesday(June 4) btw)
Thursday(June 6): I walk in and im told that she already clocked out, i say that’s fine. I’ll talk to her Saturday but i went around asking the supervisors that were there if they were in that meeting and can tell me who said that. They said, they didn’t hear anything(one of them didn’t know i put my 2 weeks in) but hinted that it maybe the LP. I said okay. I talk to the LP and he said he didn’t report anything. I said okay but now im confused on WHO said that because I asked everyone except the assistant manager.
Saturday(June 8)comes and she’s not here today but she’s here tomorrow and now i stressed because i let this sit for 4 days( now 5 because it’s midnight) and I still don’t have a schedule for this week, my manager thinks i’m not a good worker, and for me to officially start my other job , I need to reference letters and everytime i ask my supervisors, they say i need the manager and assistant manager to do it. My assistant manager is on a 2 week vacation(i think he comes later this week) and my manager now has a negative perception of me😃 i don’t want to think about what she would write on there.
Please what do i do because it sounds so suspicious to say what i said tuesday and come back to her like “heyyy😙about tuesday, well umm i lied😗”(i wont say it like that but i bet it would come off like that to her). It practically looks like i was brewing a lie up.🧙🏿‍♀️and if your a manager, PLEASE put your input about how you would view so i can know whether i just give up and leave(but with my reference letters because girl i need that other job now) or try to rewrite my wrong doings.
Im sorry this was long

Tonight, for me it was: Relief, Pride, Satisfaction, Worry, Depression, and emptiness.
Relief: I finished something I stared.
Pride: Same as relief.
Satisfaction: A mix of the above, and a feeling that what I had in mind, made it to 'paper'
Worry: Will anyone like it besides me? Then I added: Who cares. I wrote it for me, anyway.
Depression: This filled many months, gave me focus, now.. what?
Emptiness: The world in my head is now on 'paper' I dont have to think about plot points, ideas, world building, character development.. the :Hey, this will lead to that and its so cool moments and that feeling of YES when I finish a chapter, re-read it and go: mm, I like it.
I can't express how amazing it feels but at the same time; how do you process these things when you finish a book?

So this is my first time posting a DnD story here. I'm not sure how long I can make these but I just think this was funny and so far has been a highlight of my relatively short DnD career.
So I was DMing a 1 on 1 game a few months ago with the premise of the PC and a bunch of people getting isekaid into this fantasy world and accidentally taking over the bodies of people in the forgotten realms. One by one at seemingly random times throughout the month, a random person from our world would die horribly to get forcibly borrow the body of a fantasy character. And coincidentally, the PC was thrown into the body of an elven woman with a missing older brother, Eize, who apparently got a reputation after his disappearance. And PC believes that guy might have some clue how to get back home and plus the girl she's accidentally taken the body of, Luna, is now in her head and wants PC to carry out her task and find him. So both of their paths are set on finding this one guy. Perfect. The whole time, the fact that this elf woman was actually this random human from another world hijacking her body was kept a secret to most characters she came across. Including an NPC party member who I just kind of made to guide her through the basics of DnD.
It was her first time playing so I made the elf she was hijacking have an archer roommate friend who tries to see if she can shoot an arrow well, lift, and other stuff that would translate into different rolls at the start. Turns out the PC really liked him so he tagged along to help her find her missing brother not knowing that the person in control of her body and voice was... someone else entirely. Occasionally, since she's in the body of someone who already has a history with the weapon she's using (A bow. She picked a ranger) we'd just let any exceptionally good rolls be explained by the trained muscle memory of the woman whose body she's possessing kicking in and doing the heavy lifting for the PC. And occasionally, said elf woman would appear in her head for commentary, ideas, brief explanations and just another outlook on whats happening. Sometimes even throwing in a random wisdom save for select moments to see if the elf would momentarily take over. Small things like when PC is trying to get drunk, a failed random wisdom save would make the normally lightweight elf refuse to lift that mug to her lips for a brief moment. Or in another scenario when she successfully rescued tutorial NPC from being captured (which is a... whole other story), a failed random wisdom save made PC lunge forward and wrap him in a hug since the actual elf has known him for a long time so naturally she'd want to hug him. Just to remind that these were people with their own lives before they were bodyjacked. But these were just very fleeting moments of free will... fun for flavor though!
But anyways after meeting another isekaid soul who's using his host's magical powers as a means to steal and be a pretty shady dude, PC and Luna get a little tip that the guy isn't on the same plane thanks to a magic map that can track anyone in the world. PC used it on herself and someone she met but couldnt find the one they were after. So where to go next but PC a school of mages that can take her to other planes via a staff they have made specifically for this. But in exchange she has to jot down anything she can find to help them document the creatures since one of the students casted fireball in their library. Its a deal! The downside to this staff was that it needs 24 ingame hours to recharge so she has to make sure she knows where shes going. But... she doesnt. And theres like 16 planes in DnD.
So she guesses! And after a little bit of body horror explaining how the staff melts and sucks the PC into itself before teleporting to the other plane and spitting her out, the PC's sent to an area where only what is directly in front of her is visible. If its a little in her peripheral, it'll just disappear into a void. The main reason for this was because I got bored or lost trying to study what the actual planes are like and just kinda made something up for one of them. But after looking around what was basically a desolate landscape with a few abandoned towns, she finds this tall.... thing just kinda standing in a grassy field looking off somewhere. So of course, she decides now is as good time as any to draw the big fella. Was her first time drawing anything ingame. Nat 20. Turns out the person she took the body of is a Davinci-level artist and she didnt even know it and every single art PC wants to draw after this was an automatic masterpiece
But then, when she turns around to at least look for a resting point, theres something off. Roll perception: passed! Something following her.
Due to the nature of this area, she cant tell exactly what or who unless shes looking directly at it so she cant even sneak a glance over her shoulder. So she turns. Dex check: failed. Nothing.
Instead, her one and only party member NPC pointed behind her. And what she sees is the man of the hour; a big tall creature arching its freakishly long neck and spine downwards to get a better look at her with a huge array of masks with different expressions lining his back and somehow staring right at her. And on its face was a joyous mask described as being akin to one of those old tragedy/comedy plays.
PC asks "who... what are you."
And this is where I finally got to cement the name and the creature answers, "I am Gay... Though, this word has a varying meaning though does it not? Call me Happy."
We did not call them Happy. Because me and the PC were both 12 at heart and Gay is just funnier. So Gay is a Aasfaraaba, creatures who are basically just named an emotion so legally, by the books own admission, I can name a character in the most serious context, Gay. He's Gay. And that just makes me smile.
And despite the PC trying to keep the fact that she's hijacked someones body and the fact that the real elf is kind of just a bystander in her own mind a secret, the first thing Gay does is stare directly at the PC and ask "why are there two of you" completely ignoring the NPC party member and nudging forward the idea that Gay can see both people inside her. And no im not rephrasing that because I dont know how to for this one. Gay gives her some information on where the guy she's looking for is while politely says that Eize and his "parasite" are in a different plane entirely called Baator. Frankly, what else could you call these isekaid bodysnatches if not parasites? And as the creature explains this, the joy mask switched seamlessly to a different one with the only real sign its not just the mask physically changing was the discarded expression suddenly being in their hand. With more being added the more the conversation went on and the expressions had to change.
Despite Gay being a weird eldritch creature, me and the other player loved the dude and the fact that fact that their presence meant i could seamlessly make gay puns. Turns out the dude just like to come here to listen to the stories of lost souls that find their way to this place. And that they just like the weird phenomena like chocolate rain appearing at a certain time and shows off how magic simply touching the air makes a bunch of weird and random effects like summoning a simple ball of light and watching as it slowly morphs into pink strawberry icecream. Dude was just here for fun and noticed these people who dont belong here.
And after a short interaction, Gay said they didnt want to miss the chocolate rain starting soon and asked if PC had any other questions. The NPC party member is freaking out still and the actual elf woman forced as a bystander is weirded out but PC really likes him and says "I like him! Her? Um… do you have a gender by chance we can call you by?" Gay's response?
"What is that?"
Gay was just Gay. And Gay had no gender.
And that was it. A character made from a monster i thought was cool and a joke i thought was funny that quickly became a favorite among me and the player despite the dude not even showing up much. He did appear another time much later after this when she went to a different plane, Baator, which to my knowledge is basically Hell. And Gay was just kinda sitting by a river of blood and rapidly moving, outstretched arms. PC runs over to the mask enthusiast screaming, "Hey! Gay!" which of course got a nice out of game chuckle cause we are once again both 12 mentally, and this dude pulls out a mask with a guy cupping his chin and says "do I know you" And after a short awkward shift in tone with PC thinking she was racist thinking all weirdly tall mask collectors were the same person, Gay cackles, swaps to a mask of wild laughter, and says "Did you appreciate my joke?"
Turns out PC caught Gay sitting by a river of souls, stating they find it "relaxing." And proceeds to turn a piece of one of their shattered masks into a beach ball that gets tossed around by the flailing souls being whisked away. Gay gives her a hint, light plane lore, and directions on where to go when asked at this point, Gay was just the PCs very hands off guide when she goes to other planes so as to give her SOME kind of hint as to which direction her main goal is. But mostly sticking to a few random spots far away and immediately leaving to do whatever they came here for in the first place after a bit of talking.
And the FINAL of the three Gay events happened when PC finally found the elf's brother and bested him in an incredibly close boss fight with a very confused party member. Turns out the one hijacking Eize was body to- somehow successfully gain a pact with nearly every demon including Glasya, who in DnD lore, I think? is a big deal since shes the daughter of the big boss of DnD Satan. And the PC isnt fond of Eize's "parasite" using his body for evil. PC is upset. The elf whos watching her brother being puppetered like this, is upset. And the NPC is completely clueless as he lacks the context of wtf they're both talking about.
But loyal to the end, NPC helps his friend beat up her suddenly evil brother and with just a bit of health left, she tries to teleport them back home...? Back... to the normal DnD plane. i don't know what its called. But she forgot to bring Eize and the NPC tutorial friend. The guy she spent all this time trying to get and several irl months trying to find. Because all creatures need to touch the staff to teleport to a new plane and she thought that simply holding hands with someone else would drag them along. It didnt. So now she has to wait several in game hours while her ally is in literal Hell with the enemy while she has a measly 2 hit points left after the battle. So she goes back to the wizards who give her a health potion and casts a plane spell. I dont remember if thats a thing they can do but i did mention they could do it once months ago so PC just asked them to just teleport her there.
With limited time and limited health, she's spawned right back to where she did before in Baator with Gay still just chilling by the river of souls. PC desperately asks Gay to take her to Glasya's castle where Eize and her friend are still probably laid out. Gay just looks at her and says "...You're still here?"
And so engages an attempt to persuade Gay to help.... and it fails. Because I, in my brief and probably flawed readings, understood devils in DnD to be really into the idea of only helping IF you have something to offer, Gay says, "I must obey the rules of this plane, and that requires me to only help you in return of something of value. However there is nothing of value you have for me. So I cannot aid."
She tries again, saying that if she doesn't get to her brother soon, they could start a massive war against the other planes. Which... didnt need a roll. Aasfaraabas dont really give a hoot about any of that. So that one just automatically failed. "Oh, my sweet girls. The safety or conquer of the planes does not concern my kind." Didnt work either.
So in a huff PC was about to just leave. Then one more idea comes to mind. In the form of the elf shes hijacking asking her to trade knowledge about PCs non-fantasy homeworld. A persuasion roll here and it actually works!
So Gay yells something in another language and just stops time so they can hear her story. For Gay has Wish. Any spell is theirs to use including the one to stop time. "Very well. If you wouldn't mind, I will take my payment now." So they sit down and after telling Gay all about her own world with bikes, trains, cars, and a bunch of technology, And so Gay is content and simply snaps her around the proper location she needs to be. Not the exact area since theres no way to know exactly where to put her but Gay had a general idea and made the trek significantly shorter.
And that was it. Thats the final appearance of the most powerful random NPC i've ever created who just so happens to be a favorite among me and the player AND a very fun character to write. Half of the time, the descriptions of what the guy were just vague and confused as though I, the DM, didnt know what to call him. Saying things like "the tall.... thing stared down at you." "The masked.... thing" The word Aasfaraaba was foreign to the player since i didnt tell her. It was her first game and I wanted things to be naturally told via the game and the species name was never brought up in Gay's 3 whole appearances. Gay was just Gay. It became a little joke that "Gay was just Gay" The other player didnt want to know what Gay was. Didnt need to know Gay's gender. Gay was just Gay.

I binged season 1 today with some friends. I have never had a work of art made me feel this emotional. Spoilers extremely minor: honestly I feel like I don't get very emotional over media. My brother and the YouTuber schaffrilas recommend me things saying how moving it was and I'm like eh. One of the biggest reasons is I find I don't have enough time with the characters. Like akame ga kill had a bunch of emotional death scenes but they happened so fast I didn't get attached to any of the characters. However one major exception to this is anxiety. I love anxiety inducing media- basically mysteries.I recently found how much I enjoy mysteries when I watched knives out and read some of the nine princes in amber books which had my wheels spinning. Another thing I really like is when characters find really creative solutions to problems using limited resources. Like the scenes in Dr stone where they're put in a predicament and have to find a really sciency technical solution from scratch. Specifically the penultimate scene from the latest arc I won't spoil dw. Re: zero is EXACTLY perfect for this. He constantly has to work to understand what's going on around him and figure out what to do. That would be cool alone but... it's really the EMOTIONAL BEATS HOLY S*** this show twists in ways I never saw coming. And(almost) every time I got annoyed that it was leaning into a stupid trope it subverted it in an intriguing way! More on that in the next level of spoiler warning. The combat is good too but not crazy or anything, but it honestly made me want to see it bc it was always super tied into the plot so it builds anticipation and keeps it gripping with developments mid battle. Most importantly- the reason it resonates emotionally is because these geniuses found away to completely eliminate plot armor? The way the story is structured always has you nail-biting whenever the Mc is in danger, not because actual spoilers You think he's going to die and not come back, but because he's going to restart from the last point and lose everything that he worked for. But the show knows that's not gonna last forever before you get used to it and starts making you worry in other ways, like when he's suffering greatly in one loop and you are anxious bc you want him to die to stop his torture. And especially like the part midway through the season where he starts having a mental collapse. He's tearing himself apart. I honestly didn't feel bad for him because of how stubborn and unlistening he felt. I was starting to get annoyed and thinking he was just badly written but no subverted again wtf??? He starts getting disrespected when he asks for help and this time it's not his fault, and the whole time they're saying things that I has seen in his character culminating in a breaking point where he admits his flaws openly and says how much he hates himself. Up to this point I was really not liking how rem was liking him, like ughhhhh it's just gonna be another stupid isekai harem bruh. But this moment totally changed my tune. They give her a really fleshed out character and callback to a moment where it actually makes sense that she likes him. The moment where they have an honest to god talk and she helps him get back on his feet and grow a lot as a person hits hard ngl. But tbh she kinda deserves him more than he deserves Emily like please marry this woman God she deserves you stop chasing this other girl. BUT even my tune was changed(a little) when the conversation gets echoed and I realized that the way rem feels about him is the same way he feels about Emily like what the symbolism goes crazy???? Super major spoilers don't click unless you've seen it don't do it!!!!! The season finale. That shit hit me like a truck . You finally think things are going his way! I totally let my guard down. I noticed rem was missing but I just thought she went somewhere and I missed it. "Who's rem". That sentence has kept me up all night. It's the reason I'm still on reddit writing this at 2 am. Idek what to say. I need to edit a video tomorrow I have a good idea I might post it here idk. But dude... TLDR WATCH RE: ZERO

One thing I am doing I don’t see people mention to much is, in addition to the many other apps and videos I use, is read children’s books and use Greek to Greek dictionary.
I am about A2 level so find Disney and The Little Prince too difficult. I mean do you know how to say fumerole or Bilbao tree in Greek? Or Springer Spaniel or mermaid? So while those are written for kids there is a lot of vocabulary too.
So I am working through a Delta Publishing book on Greek mythology at what they call level 3. Then reading a children’s book for ages 5 to 6. It’s important to get a book where the lines and margins give space for you to write.
Such books are usually more interesting than the dialogue given in teaching books. After all the people who write them have a different goal in mind: write something interesting.
I also like looking up words in a Greek to Greek dictionary. For one thing it keeps it interesting. It also teaches you how to look for nouns and verbs in their infinite or whatever is their root form. It teaches you to learn how to think about what the alphabetical order of words in Greek. And most importantly it teaches you that words like περνάω have many different uses. The paper dictionary gives all uses. The translation app usually gives one.
Just an idea of how to add one more tool to the set of tools you use.
Anyone do that? Please write back if you have something pleasant or constructive to say.

I never dated.
I was to busy with depression in high school. I had girls which were interested in me, but I pushed them away because of my lack of confidence and self hatred.
I‘m in Uni now and arguably no longer depressed but still with a lot of insecurity.
I want to change that.
I want to find someone which I can really connect to and be together with, thinking about each other’s life and problems.
I hate Tinder. All the girls look so fake with their fancy vacation photos and I wouldn’t even know how to write with them anyway.
I love to go on night walks. Especially in the forests. Places like these give me a unspeakable sense of freedom and solitude. Like I could disappear into the trees.
I love poetry and photography. I like to describe my feelings with them.
Music is also something I can’t life without. I play the guitar myself and I love a wide range of genres. Ranging from Black metal, to melancholic drum and bass and various rap subgernes.
I love horror movies and mystery stuff. Although I‘m way to scared to watch them alone or sober.
I love to play video games. If you do too, I will be sure we will find something in common. If not, I‘m open for anything new.
Well and as stated in the title. I am a introvert by nature. But a chronic dopamine deficiency in my brain forces me to be extroverted, you can guess how this beautiful disorder is called.
I promise you’ll never get bored with me. I don’t know what I‘m doing wrong (or right I guess) but people think that I am a funny person even when I don’t try to be funny.
And yeah about the physical aspect. I have heard a few girls say to me that I‘m hot or attractive but I‘m still with a lot of insecurities from the past and I cant take their word for that.
I lift weights regularly. Height I don’t know and don’t care. i guess between 1,81-1,83 cm. And I still got all my teeth
My preferences would be.. well be alive and non-related would a good start. I would be also cool if you have a discord account since i dont use reddit often.
So yeah if this speaks to you don’t hesitate to dm me looking forward to getting to know you better.

This post is all about deliverability. The basic math equation is simple. More people will buy from your emails if more people see your emails. So if your open rates are below 20%, you can probably double them by just following the basic tips I give you below.
With that being said, let's get started.
Here are 10 things you should avoid doing regularly if you want to have good deliverability:

1. Don’t keep unengaged members on your email list. If your business isn't seasonal and someone hasn't opened your emails in over 6 months you should consider either reducing the volume of emails that are sent to them or completely removing them from your email list. They will bring your open rates down and this will increase your chances of being marketed as spam.
   
2. Break your list down. Segmentation does not matter if you have less than 2k emails. But once you get to 10k+ emails You’ll need these 4 basic segments: Buyers, Non-buyer, Engaged customers, and Non-engaged customers. You can personalize emails based on what they have bought/viewed. This alone will significantly boost your open rates. Think of it like this, what’s more likely to be opened? FREE SHIPPING on everything Today Only OR You’re in luck🎲 – Free Shipping for the next 6 hours in {{Users_city}} (while recommending items that they have viewed recently in the email)
   
3. Beware of spam filters - Did you know that you could get blacklisted? If your domain is unhealthy your emails will almost always go directly to spam. It's almost impossible to revive a domain so be careful how you go about sending from your main domain. Also if you burnt a domain in the past from 1 IP address it's likely that if you create a new domain using that same IP address your 2nd domain also will be negatively affected. If you use a shifty email sending provider you will also run into spam filter problems.
   
4. Write a good subject line. The subject line is the single most important aspect of email copywriting. There are typically only 2 types of good subject lines. Subject lines to make people curious and subject lines that are direct (Typically with a good offer). That’s literally all there is to it. Also, don't lead with a misleading subject line. Pissing people off is the easiest way to get spam complaints instead of normal unsubscribes. (Spam complaints are way worse for deliverability)
   
5. Don't be inconsistent. Algorithms love consistency. This is why the number 1 way to boost engagement on almost any social platform ever created is to post consistently and follow some sort of routine. Emails aren't different at all. Try to email your most engaged segment every week. This will give you a good average open rate and also it will show the email service provider that people interact with your content regularly.
   
6. Don't try to hide the unsubscribe button. Not having an unsubscribe button is illegal but some people just try to use cheat codes like making the unsubscribe text white on a white background. This is the easiest way to increase spam complaints greatly. Customers should never feel like you're forcing them to do anything.
   
7. Don't send emails from shady domains. You should have a clear professional-looking sender address. Use a business domain, not a regular email account. Avoid using any random characters anywhere in the domain and do everything you can to make it very clear where the email is coming from.
   
8. Make sure your grammar is on point. Typos of any kind can be a red flag for spam filters. It's impossible to be perfect all the time but at least try to make sure your emails have less typos than this Reddit post.
   
9. Never buy email lists and use them for B2C marketing. Sending to people without their consent is the worst thing that you could possibly do if you're trying to avoid the spam filter. Make sure every single email address that is receiving your emails has opted in.
   
10. Don't use spammy copywriting. Most people have literally no idea what this means so I put together a list of things that are generally bad. Here is the list of things to avoid: Using all caps for subject lines, capitalizing every word in your subject lines all the time, using large fonts, using fonts smaller than size 8 font in main bodies of sales copy, overusing words like FREE or SALE in your subject lines and over using emojis.
    

I want to end this with a reminder that no one is above spam filters. If you go to your spam folder right now you'll probably see at least one 8 figure company stuck in there multiple times. These people hire "experts" and pay them thousands every month and still can't figure it out. So just because your emails are doing okay now, just know that can change fast if you are not careful.

This post is all about deliverability. The basic math equation is simple. More people will buy from your emails if more people see your emails. So if your open rates are below 20%, you can probably double them by just following the basic tips I give you below.
With that being said, let's get started.
Here are 10 things you should avoid doing regularly if you want to have good deliverability:

1. Don’t keep unengaged members on your email list. If your business isn't seasonal and someone hasn't opened your emails in over 6 months you should consider either reducing the volume of emails that are sent to them or completely removing them from your email list. They will bring your open rates down and this will increase your chances of being marketed as spam.
   
2. Break your list down. Segmentation does not matter if you have less than 2k emails. But once you get to 10k+ emails You’ll need these 4 basic segments: Buyers, Non-buyer, Engaged customers, and Non-engaged customers. You can personalize emails based on what they have bought/viewed. This alone will significantly boost your open rates. Think of it like this, what’s more likely to be opened? FREE SHIPPING on everything Today Only OR You’re in luck🎲 – Free Shipping for the next 6 hours in {{Users_city}} (while recommending items that they have viewed recently in the email)
   
3. Beware of spam filters - Did you know that you could get blacklisted? If your domain is unhealthy your emails will almost always go directly to spam. It's almost impossible to revive a domain so be careful how you go about sending from your main domain. Also if you burnt a domain in the past from 1 IP address it's likely that if you create a new domain using that same IP address your 2nd domain also will be negatively affected. If you use a shifty email sending provider you will also run into spam filter problems.
   
4. Write a good subject line. The subject line is the single most important aspect of email copywriting. There are typically only 2 types of good subject lines. Subject lines to make people curious and subject lines that are direct (Typically with a good offer). That’s literally all there is to it. Also, don't lead with a misleading subject line. Pissing people off is the easiest way to get spam complaints instead of normal unsubscribes. (Spam complaints are way worse for deliverability)
   
5. Don't be inconsistent. Algorithms love consistency. This is why the number 1 way to boost engagement on almost any social platform ever created is to post consistently and follow some sort of routine. Emails aren't different at all. Try to email your most engaged segment every week. This will give you a good average open rate and also it will show the email service provider that people interact with your content regularly.
   
6. Don't try to hide the unsubscribe button. Not having an unsubscribe button is illegal but some people just try to use cheat codes like making the unsubscribe text white on a white background. This is the easiest way to increase spam complaints greatly. Customers should never feel like you're forcing them to do anything.
   
7. Don't send emails from shady domains. You should have a clear professional-looking sender address. Use a business domain, not a regular email account. Avoid using any random characters anywhere in the domain and do everything you can to make it very clear where the email is coming from.
   
8. Make sure your grammar is on point. Typos of any kind can be a red flag for spam filters. It's impossible to be perfect all the time but at least try to make sure your emails have less typos than this Reddit post.
   
9. Never buy email lists and use them for B2C marketing. Sending to people without their consent is the worst thing that you could possibly do if you're trying to avoid the spam filter. Make sure every single email address that is receiving your emails has opted in.
   
10. Don't use spammy copywriting. Most people have literally no idea what this means so I put together a list of things that are generally bad. Here is the list of things to avoid: Using all caps for subject lines, capitalizing every word in your subject lines all the time, using large fonts, using fonts smaller than size 8 font in main bodies of sales copy, overusing words like FREE or SALE in your subject lines and over using emojis.
    

I want to end this with a reminder that no one is above spam filters. If you go to your spam folder right now you'll probably see at least one 8 figure company stuck in there multiple times. These people hire "experts" and pay them thousands every month and still can't figure it out. So just because your emails are doing okay now, just know that can change fast if you are not careful.

This post is all about deliverability. The basic math equation is simple. More people will buy from your emails if more people see your emails. So if your open rates are below 20%, you can probably double them by just following the basic tips I give you below.
With that being said, let's get started.
Here are 10 things you should avoid doing regularly if you want to have good deliverability:

1. Don’t keep unengaged members on your email list. If your business isn't seasonal and someone hasn't opened your emails in over 6 months you should consider either reducing the volume of emails that are sent to them or completely removing them from your email list. They will bring your open rates down and this will increase your chances of being marketed as spam.
   
2. Break your list down. Segmentation does not matter if you have less than 2k emails. But once you get to 10k+ emails You’ll need these 4 basic segments: Buyers, Non-buyer, Engaged customers, and Non-engaged customers. You can personalize emails based on what they have bought/viewed. This alone will significantly boost your open rates. Think of it like this, what’s more likely to be opened? FREE SHIPPING on everything Today Only OR You’re in luck🎲 – Free Shipping for the next 6 hours in {{Users_city}} (while recommending items that they have viewed recently in the email)
   
3. Beware of spam filters - Did you know that you could get blacklisted? If your domain is unhealthy your emails will almost always go directly to spam. It's almost impossible to revive a domain so be careful how you go about sending from your main domain. Also if you burnt a domain in the past from 1 IP address it's likely that if you create a new domain using that same IP address your 2nd domain also will be negatively affected. If you use a shifty email sending provider you will also run into spam filter problems.
   
4. Write a good subject line. The subject line is the single most important aspect of email copywriting. There are typically only 2 types of good subject lines. Subject lines to make people curious and subject lines that are direct (Typically with a good offer). That’s literally all there is to it. Also, don't lead with a misleading subject line. Pissing people off is the easiest way to get spam complaints instead of normal unsubscribes. (Spam complaints are way worse for deliverability)
   
5. Don't be inconsistent. Algorithms love consistency. This is why the number 1 way to boost engagement on almost any social platform ever created is to post consistently and follow some sort of routine. Emails aren't different at all. Try to email your most engaged segment every week. This will give you a good average open rate and also it will show the email service provider that people interact with your content regularly.
   
6. Don't try to hide the unsubscribe button. Not having an unsubscribe button is illegal but some people just try to use cheat codes like making the unsubscribe text white on a white background. This is the easiest way to increase spam complaints greatly. Customers should never feel like you're forcing them to do anything.
   
7. Don't send emails from shady domains. You should have a clear professional-looking sender address. Use a business domain, not a regular email account. Avoid using any random characters anywhere in the domain and do everything you can to make it very clear where the email is coming from.
   
8. Make sure your grammar is on point. Typos of any kind can be a red flag for spam filters. It's impossible to be perfect all the time but at least try to make sure your emails have less typos than this Reddit post.
   
9. Never buy email lists and use them for B2C marketing. Sending to people without their consent is the worst thing that you could possibly do if you're trying to avoid the spam filter. Make sure every single email address that is receiving your emails has opted in.
   
10. Don't use spammy copywriting. Most people have literally no idea what this means so I put together a list of things that are generally bad. Here is the list of things to avoid: Using all caps for subject lines, capitalizing every word in your subject lines all the time, using large fonts, using fonts smaller than size 8 font in main bodies of sales copy, overusing words like FREE or SALE in your subject lines and over using emojis.
    

I want to end this with a reminder that no one is above spam filters. If you go to your spam folder right now you'll probably see at least one 8 figure company stuck in there multiple times. These people hire "experts" and pay them thousands every month and still can't figure it out. So just because your emails are doing okay now, just know that can change fast if you are not careful.

This post is all about deliverability. The basic math equation is simple. More people will buy from your emails if more people see your emails. So if your open rates are below 20%, you can probably double them by just following the basic tips I give you below.
With that being said, let's get started.
Here are 10 things you should avoid doing regularly if you want to have good deliverability:

1. Don’t keep unengaged members on your email list. If your business isn't seasonal and someone hasn't opened your emails in over 6 months you should consider either reducing the volume of emails that are sent to them or completely removing them from your email list. They will bring your open rates down and this will increase your chances of being marketed as spam.
   
2. Break your list down. Segmentation does not matter if you have less than 2k emails. But once you get to 10k+ emails You’ll need these 4 basic segments: Buyers, Non-buyer, Engaged customers, and Non-engaged customers. You can personalize emails based on what they have bought/viewed. This alone will significantly boost your open rates. Think of it like this, what’s more likely to be opened? FREE SHIPPING on everything Today Only OR You’re in luck🎲 – Free Shipping for the next 6 hours in {{Users_city}} (while recommending items that they have viewed recently in the email)
   
3. Beware of spam filters - Did you know that you could get blacklisted? If your domain is unhealthy your emails will almost always go directly to spam. It's almost impossible to revive a domain so be careful how you go about sending from your main domain. Also if you burnt a domain in the past from 1 IP address it's likely that if you create a new domain using that same IP address your 2nd domain also will be negatively affected. If you use a shifty email sending provider you will also run into spam filter problems.
   
4. Write a good subject line. The subject line is the single most important aspect of email copywriting. There are typically only 2 types of good subject lines. Subject lines to make people curious and subject lines that are direct (Typically with a good offer). That’s literally all there is to it. Also, don't lead with a misleading subject line. Pissing people off is the easiest way to get spam complaints instead of normal unsubscribes. (Spam complaints are way worse for deliverability)
   
5. Don't be inconsistent. Algorithms love consistency. This is why the number 1 way to boost engagement on almost any social platform ever created is to post consistently and follow some sort of routine. Emails aren't different at all. Try to email your most engaged segment every week. This will give you a good average open rate and also it will show the email service provider that people interact with your content regularly.
   
6. Don't try to hide the unsubscribe button. Not having an unsubscribe button is illegal but some people just try to use cheat codes like making the unsubscribe text white on a white background. This is the easiest way to increase spam complaints greatly. Customers should never feel like you're forcing them to do anything.
   
7. Don't send emails from shady domains. You should have a clear professional-looking sender address. Use a business domain, not a regular email account. Avoid using any random characters anywhere in the domain and do everything you can to make it very clear where the email is coming from.
   
8. Make sure your grammar is on point. Typos of any kind can be a red flag for spam filters. It's impossible to be perfect all the time but at least try to make sure your emails have less typos than this Reddit post.
   
9. Never buy email lists and use them for B2C marketing. Sending to people without their consent is the worst thing that you could possibly do if you're trying to avoid the spam filter. Make sure every single email address that is receiving your emails has opted in.
   
10. Don't use spammy copywriting. Most people have literally no idea what this means so I put together a list of things that are generally bad. Here is the list of things to avoid: Using all caps for subject lines, capitalizing every word in your subject lines all the time, using large fonts, using fonts smaller than size 8 font in main bodies of sales copy, overusing words like FREE or SALE in your subject lines and over using emojis.
    

I want to end this with a reminder that no one is above spam filters. If you go to your spam folder right now you'll probably see at least one 8 figure company stuck in there multiple times. These people hire "experts" and pay them thousands every month and still can't figure it out. So just because your emails are doing okay now, just know that can change fast if you are not careful.

I started playing Eternal in early 2017. Initially I started due to my love for MTG and the fact that there wasn't really an accessible way to play it digitally, especially on mobile. Immediately I fell in love with Eternal and really began to see it as its own unique experience rather than an MTG clone. After some time building up my collection, I made masters nearly every single month for years. I even played draft quite a bit and made masters occasionally there too. And after expedition came out, I routinely achieved masters in both throne and expedition, and a couple times even got the triple masters. This isn't necessarily to say that I am or was a good player, but that I played a lot and my interest in the game was kept high. While the meta has had its highs and lows, I think it's safe to say that overall Direwolf was doing a great job with the game.
Starting out, the game had a solid release schedule: sets would come out in 5-6 month periods, with a campaign/bundle somewhere in between (sometimes two). However, starting in 2022 there was a change: the time between Unleashed and Behemoths of Thera was 8 months, which was unprecedented. Then after that, Battle Lines was released 9 months later. Now, we are currently 8 months into the release schedule. With a bundle just coming out, my guess is that there will not be another full set until at least August at the earliest. But it could be even later. We may even be looking at a year or more between sets at this point.
It was around Battle Lines that my interest started to decline. I saw the writing on the wall, so to speak. But I only truly noticed it because the lag in sets started to make games feel the same far too long. After sets are released it's often chaos on the ladder as people are trying new things, which makes it really fun. The previous release cadence often meant that at least for me, if I was getting bored I'll have a new set to look forward to soon to shake things up. I used to play every day, don't think I missed a single daily for years. Then I started just getting my daily every day. Now I'm only logging on once a week to do the weekly promo game, and even then I rarely play much on the ladder. Also, I used to regularly buy those prerelease bundles for sets. I haven't done that since at least 2022.
The slow schedule is also hurting the story. Yes, the story is rather cartoonish, especially with the reused villains at this point. However, it's always been fun at least on a surface level. Not just that but seeing how the cards represent the different factions, creatures, and personalities of the world. Thera is cool but at this point we probably won't see any new theme or area until at least mid 2025, as the next set will probably be the conclusion to the Thera arc (hopefully, otherwise we might be looking at 2026).
Now all this being said, I do understand that Direwolf has their reasons. Maybe the game just doesn't bring in enough money to justify more support, or maybe they just got burnt out. On a note of positivity, I will say that the weekly promos are actually a good thing, and that's why I'm largely not bemoaning the loss of campaigns. But that being said, I don't feel like it makes up for the 1 set a year schedule we may be on now.
How do you all feel about this? Has the change in release schedule made the game worse for you? Or, maybe, it has had a positive effect for some of you?

This post is all about deliverability. The basic math equation is simple. More people will buy from your emails if more people see your emails. So if your open rates are below 20%, you can probably double them by just following the basic tips I give you below.
With that being said, let's get started.
Here are 10 things you should avoid doing regularly if you want to have good deliverability:

1. Don’t keep unengaged members on your email list. If your business isn't seasonal and someone hasn't opened your emails in over 6 months you should consider either reducing the volume of emails that are sent to them or completely removing them from your email list. They will bring your open rates down and this will increase your chances of being marketed as spam.
   
2. Break your list down. Segmentation does not matter if you have less than 2k emails. But once you get to 10k+ emails You’ll need these 4 basic segments: Buyers, Non-buyer, Engaged customers, and Non-engaged customers. You can personalize emails based on what they have bought/viewed. This alone will significantly boost your open rates. Think of it like this, what’s more likely to be opened? FREE SHIPPING on everything Today Only OR You’re in luck🎲 – Free Shipping for the next 6 hours in {{Users_city}} (while recommending items that they have viewed recently in the email)
   
3. Beware of spam filters - Did you know that you could get blacklisted? If your domain is unhealthy your emails will almost always go directly to spam. It's almost impossible to revive a domain so be careful how you go about sending from your main domain. Also if you burnt a domain in the past from 1 IP address it's likely that if you create a new domain using that same IP address your 2nd domain also will be negatively affected. If you use a shifty email sending provider you will also run into spam filter problems.
   
4. Write a good subject line. The subject line is the single most important aspect of email copywriting. There are typically only 2 types of good subject lines. Subject lines to make people curious and subject lines that are direct (Typically with a good offer). That’s literally all there is to it. Also, don't lead with a misleading subject line. Pissing people off is the easiest way to get spam complaints instead of normal unsubscribes. (Spam complaints are way worse for deliverability)
   
5. Don't be inconsistent. Algorithms love consistency. This is why the number 1 way to boost engagement on almost any social platform ever created is to post consistently and follow some sort of routine. Emails aren't different at all. Try to email your most engaged segment every week. This will give you a good average open rate and also it will show the email service provider that people interact with your content regularly.
   
6. Don't try to hide the unsubscribe button. Not having an unsubscribe button is illegal but some people just try to use cheat codes like making the unsubscribe text white on a white background. This is the easiest way to increase spam complaints greatly. Customers should never feel like you're forcing them to do anything.
   
7. Don't send emails from shady domains. You should have a clear professional-looking sender address. Use a business domain, not a regular email account. Avoid using any random characters anywhere in the domain and do everything you can to make it very clear where the email is coming from.
   
8. Make sure your grammar is on point. Typos of any kind can be a red flag for spam filters. It's impossible to be perfect all the time but at least try to make sure your emails have less typos than this Reddit post.
   
9. Never buy email lists and use them for B2C marketing. Sending to people without their consent is the worst thing that you could possibly do if you're trying to avoid the spam filter. Make sure every single email address that is receiving your emails has opted in.
   
10. Don't use spammy copywriting. Most people have literally no idea what this means so I put together a list of things that are generally bad. Here is the list of things to avoid: Using all caps for subject lines, capitalizing every word in your subject lines all the time, using large fonts, using fonts smaller than size 8 font in main bodies of sales copy, overusing words like FREE or SALE in your subject lines and over using emojis.
    

I want to end this with a reminder that no one is above spam filters. If you go to your spam folder right now you'll probably see at least one 8 figure company stuck in there multiple times. These people hire "experts" and pay them thousands every month and still can't figure it out. So just because your emails are doing okay now, just know that can change fast if you are not careful.

This post is all about deliverability. The basic math equation is simple. More people will buy from your emails if more people see your emails. So if your open rates are below 20%, you can probably double them by just following the basic tips I give you below.
With that being said, let's get started.
Here are 10 things you should avoid doing regularly if you want to have good deliverability:

1. Don’t keep unengaged members on your email list. If your business isn't seasonal and someone hasn't opened your emails in over 6 months you should consider either reducing the volume of emails that are sent to them or completely removing them from your email list. They will bring your open rates down and this will increase your chances of being marketed as spam.
   
2. Break your list down. Segmentation does not matter if you have less than 2k emails. But once you get to 10k+ emails You’ll need these 4 basic segments: Buyers, Non-buyer, Engaged customers, and Non-engaged customers. You can personalize emails based on what they have bought/viewed. This alone will significantly boost your open rates. Think of it like this, what’s more likely to be opened? FREE SHIPPING on everything Today Only OR You’re in luck🎲 – Free Shipping for the next 6 hours in {{Users_city}} (while recommending items that they have viewed recently in the email)
   
3. Beware of spam filters - Did you know that you could get blacklisted? If your domain is unhealthy your emails will almost always go directly to spam. It's almost impossible to revive a domain so be careful how you go about sending from your main domain. Also if you burnt a domain in the past from 1 IP address it's likely that if you create a new domain using that same IP address your 2nd domain also will be negatively affected. If you use a shifty email sending provider you will also run into spam filter problems.
   
4. Write a good subject line. The subject line is the single most important aspect of email copywriting. There are typically only 2 types of good subject lines. Subject lines to make people curious and subject lines that are direct (Typically with a good offer). That’s literally all there is to it. Also, don't lead with a misleading subject line. Pissing people off is the easiest way to get spam complaints instead of normal unsubscribes. (Spam complaints are way worse for deliverability)
   
5. Don't be inconsistent. Algorithms love consistency. This is why the number 1 way to boost engagement on almost any social platform ever created is to post consistently and follow some sort of routine. Emails aren't different at all. Try to email your most engaged segment every week. This will give you a good average open rate and also it will show the email service provider that people interact with your content regularly.
   
6. Don't try to hide the unsubscribe button. Not having an unsubscribe button is illegal but some people just try to use cheat codes like making the unsubscribe text white on a white background. This is the easiest way to increase spam complaints greatly. Customers should never feel like you're forcing them to do anything.
   
7. Don't send emails from shady domains. You should have a clear professional-looking sender address. Use a business domain, not a regular email account. Avoid using any random characters anywhere in the domain and do everything you can to make it very clear where the email is coming from.
   
8. Make sure your grammar is on point. Typos of any kind can be a red flag for spam filters. It's impossible to be perfect all the time but at least try to make sure your emails have less typos than this Reddit post.
   
9. Never buy email lists and use them for B2C marketing. Sending to people without their consent is the worst thing that you could possibly do if you're trying to avoid the spam filter. Make sure every single email address that is receiving your emails has opted in.
   
10. Don't use spammy copywriting. Most people have literally no idea what this means so I put together a list of things that are generally bad. Here is the list of things to avoid: Using all caps for subject lines, capitalizing every word in your subject lines all the time, using large fonts, using fonts smaller than size 8 font in main bodies of sales copy, overusing words like FREE or SALE in your subject lines and over using emojis.
    

I want to end this with a reminder that no one is above spam filters. If you go to your spam folder right now you'll probably see at least one 8 figure company stuck in there multiple times. These people hire "experts" and pay them thousands every month and still can't figure it out. So just because your emails are doing okay now, just know that can change fast if you are not careful.